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Author Topic:   Dirty Jokes.....Post yours
venusdeindia
unregistered
posted June 08, 2008 09:34 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him. “Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing.” “
What do they say?” the priest inquired.

They say, “Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?”

“That’s obscene!” the priest exclaimed. Then he thought for a moment.

“You know,” he said, “I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we’ll put them in the cage with Francis and Peter. My parrots can teach your parrots to praise and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time.”

“Thank you,” the woman responded, “this may very well be the solution.”

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest’s house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying. Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them.

After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison: “Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?”

There was stunned silence.

Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed, “Put the beads away, Frank. Our prayers have been answered!”


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cancerrg
Newflake

Posts: 0
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Registered: Sep 2012

posted June 08, 2008 09:59 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Fantastic ad by Uttar Pradesh tourism Dept for TAJ MAHAL :

"Come Via-Agra .....
and see Man's gretaest erection for woman "

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venusdeindia
unregistered
posted June 08, 2008 10:34 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
OMG, that cant be

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Inner depths
unregistered
posted June 08, 2008 10:55 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A white horse fell in the mud.......

ID

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fieryscales
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posted June 08, 2008 11:27 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
LOL @ Cancer's joke

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BlueRoamer
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Posts: 160
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posted June 08, 2008 01:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BlueRoamer     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That's a good one venus.

I don't get cancerrgs joke!

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fieryscales
unregistered
posted June 08, 2008 05:00 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You don't get Cancer's joke?

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yourfriendinspirit
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posted June 08, 2008 08:45 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The Taj Mahal, is a mausoleum located in Agra, India, that was built under Mughal Emperor Shah Jahan in memory of his favorite wife, Mumtaz Mahal.

Come via - Agra and see mans greatest erection for woman

*Where as the drug Viagra, causes also a similar effect without the travel...

That is funny as heck!

Liked yours too venusdeindia

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venusdeindia
unregistered
posted June 09, 2008 12:26 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
lol at BR

cancergg has the best one yet...any more from others ???

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cancerrg
Newflake

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Registered: Sep 2012

posted June 09, 2008 10:59 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Advertisement by a panty manufacturer :

"We are not the best in the world but we are closest to the best thing in the world "


Its funny when people discuss over "love marriage " and "arranged marriage ", its like asking a person if he would like to hang himself or shoot himself

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robyn.c
unregistered
posted June 09, 2008 11:50 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
this thicko picks up a lump of doggy doo-dah and says "look what i nearly trod in"

dont really do dirty jokes.
im such a prude

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LEXX
Knowflake

Posts: 9745
From: Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat.......& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Apr 2009

posted June 09, 2008 06:56 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LEXX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
OMGT! Those were fabulous!!!!

This is not an actual joke but is a scream!LOL!

http://youtube.com/watch?feature=related&v=RhWZ4gNqPP0

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venusdeindia
unregistered
posted June 10, 2008 01:48 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
loved em all, esp Cancergg pany one LOL

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cancerrg
Newflake

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From:
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posted June 11, 2008 11:43 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cancerrg     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ok one more on NOT so hevay public demand

Mrs Blair, Mrs Putin and Hillary Clinton are having a chat on penis .

Mrs Blair : In UK we call it Gentleman bcos it satnds up , everytime aldy walks in
Mrs Putin : in Russia we call it Rebel since we dont know whether its going to attack from the front or the back.
Mrs Clinton: In US , we call it Rumour for it travels from mouth to mouth .

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lalalinda
Moderator

Posts: 5107
From: nevada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted June 13, 2008 11:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for lalalinda     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A crazy guy in a Saran Wrap diaper walks into a Psychiatrist's office and asks the Dr.
"what is the matter with me?

the Dr. replies " Well for starters, I can clearly see you're (your) nuts!


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ghanima81
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Posts: 1121
From: Maine
Registered: Apr 2009

posted June 13, 2008 04:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for ghanima81     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Three women: one engaged one married and one a mistress are chatting about their relationships and decided to amaze their men.

That night all three will wear black leather bras, stiletto heels and a mask over their eyes.

After a few days they meet up for lunch.

The engaged woman: The other night when my fiance came over he found me with a black
leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask.

He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my life. I love you.' Then we made love all night long.

The mistress: Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing the leather bodice, heels, mask over my eyes and a raincoat.

When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we had wild sex all night.


The married woman: I sent the kids to stay at my mother's house for the night.

When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes.

As soon as he came in the door and saw me he said, 'What's for dinner, Batman?'


Not too dirty, but cute...

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venusdeindia
unregistered
posted June 14, 2008 02:28 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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Lexxigramer
Moderator

Posts: 6093
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012

posted March 03, 2013 04:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lexxigramer     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Old thread but funny anyhow.
And not actually dirty.

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Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 83127
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
Registered: Apr 2009

posted March 04, 2013 02:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Nope, not too dirty.

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Randall
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From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
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posted March 05, 2013 12:54 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A white horse fell in the mud.

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Randall
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Posts: 83127
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
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posted March 11, 2013 12:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Tough crowd.

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Lexxigramer
Moderator

Posts: 6093
From: The Etheric Realms...Still out looking for Schrodinger's cat...& LEXIGRAMMING.♥.. is my Passion!
Registered: Feb 2012

posted March 12, 2013 11:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lexxigramer     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
LOL!
Now he is a filthy beast.

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Randall
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Posts: 83127
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
Registered: Apr 2009

posted May 16, 2013 01:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Could use some humor right now.

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Gabby
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posted May 30, 2013 09:56 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Gabby     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Why do they PMS, PMS?
Because Mad Cow disease was already taken.

Whats the opposite of Irony?
Wrinkly, Da!

My fav saying..
Silence is Golden...
Duct tape is silver, but has the same effect!

@Randal, i couldn't stop laughing at your dirty joke, it was hilarious! LOL

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Randall
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Posts: 83127
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
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posted May 31, 2013 01:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Glad somebody thought so.

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