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Author Topic:   what kind of a behaviour is this? any idea.
AceNeerav
Knowflake

Posts: 90
From: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Registered: Apr 2008

posted July 17, 2008 02:57 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AceNeerav     Edit/Delete Message
i have developed this strange habit since last 5 years or so.

-> every once in a while i feel like formatting my pc again. each time i think i would not again but i do it.
-> i master reset my phone again and again.
-> i feel like chaging my phones again and again and i think this is gonna be the last one but a year down i crave for another
-> i just got my 4th computer in 5 years. i already have 2 other at home.
-> i just feel like i want to wipe the slate clean but i focus on trivial issues.
-> i do not like to see any kind of old clothes or thing around in the house. in exact contradiction my mom keeps even 10 year old clothes and things that have stopped working for long.

is this somekind of obsessive compulsive behaviour? i just got a brand new apple mac and have used it for like 5 days and feeling like formatting it for no reason. something in me shouts "change! change! begin again! "

is my subconsious trying to tell me somthing? i feel like having full control of my environment... lik my computer, my closet, my bed, my room's furniture, the color of the room, the curtains etc etc. but in exact contradiction i dont get to have any control on this. when we were getting our room colored i had a fight with dad as he didnt consider my choice. then to just show others that he does consider my opinion he would ask which color i want. then he would endlessly agrue about how that choice is a stupid one. eventually he got it to the color he wanted saying, "when u buy a flat of ur own money get it colored the way u want".

my dad is
asc aries
sun aries
moon virgo

mom
asc cap
sun leo
moon sag

bro
asc gem
sun leo
moon leo

me
asc virgo
sun sag
moon sag

there is always some sort of power struggle amongst us. and its is me alone who has to suffer cause the other three somehow make an arrangement amongts them selves.

i feel suffocated with them. mom and dad are real control freaks.

mom wants to dictates evrything and everyone, dad likes to keep everyone on the toes. my bro is growing up in similar lines. aargh, where is this discussion going?

one more thing, i also change my email id and phone number again and again.

i am going to talk to my psychiatrist about this, this time when i visit him.

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bunnies
Knowflake

Posts: 346
From: U.K
Registered: Mar 2007

posted July 17, 2008 03:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for bunnies     Edit/Delete Message
It sounds very much like obsessive compulsive disorder but I think you have answered your own question.

It is almost always triggered by anxiety and is a way of the mind keeping control of a situation that already feels out of control.
Think back five years and see what the trigger was.
The reformatting seems quite obvious to me.
You have said things are not comfortable in your relationships so you are going to keep starting again till you get it right.

Your mind is saying "Well it's still not right so if I start again from scratch....

There is a root cause to all this and I think you already are aware of what it is.
You need to find ways to remove yourself from it.
And I expect I will open a can of worms saying this but I don't think indulging it with therapy is going to help you.
I think it is one of those disorders that the more attention you give it the worse it gets.
Most people suffer from it and in a mild form or another during times of stress.
It's the source of stress that needs eradicating.

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future_uncertain
Knowflake

Posts: 2879
From: ohio
Registered: Aug 2004

posted July 22, 2008 10:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for future_uncertain     Edit/Delete Message
Hello to both of you.

Ace-- have you gone to counseling at all? Is it something readily available where you live?

I'll check in with you again soon...

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PeaceAngel
Knowflake

Posts: 1124
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008

posted July 23, 2008 07:13 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for PeaceAngel     Edit/Delete Message
ace

honestly, it sounds to me that what you seek is a new beginning. new this, new that - everything has to be fresh and start again - like it's giving you another chance each time - a new identity maybe. i've found that when this type of behaviour happens it's usually someone running from something inside themselves so they try to renew or refresh their environment. does this make any sense to you?

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PeaceAngel
Knowflake

Posts: 1124
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008

posted July 23, 2008 07:14 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for PeaceAngel     Edit/Delete Message
may i ask your age?

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AceNeerav
Knowflake

Posts: 90
From: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Registered: Apr 2008

posted July 24, 2008 07:00 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AceNeerav     Edit/Delete Message
my age is 24, male.

it makes total sense what u guys are saying. future, i live in mumbai where ample of counseling is available. i have been going to a psychiatrist since dec 03. and it has helped me a lot. but many such things happening in my regular life i haven't been able to discuss cause i simply forget about it!

my doc is one of the best in india. and i was advised by many general practitioners to not change doctors relating to mental conditions especially if u have been counseling with a famous doctor like mine.

my doc has given me some mantras which i dont follow cause i get bored of it within a short time. one was he advised me to go to gym and loose weight. and other was to meditate and do some pranayama.

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PeaceAngel
Knowflake

Posts: 1124
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008

posted July 24, 2008 07:43 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for PeaceAngel     Edit/Delete Message
sweetheart, do you have attention deficit disorder?

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future_uncertain
Knowflake

Posts: 2879
From: ohio
Registered: Aug 2004

posted July 25, 2008 08:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for future_uncertain     Edit/Delete Message
You took the words out of my mouth, Peace.

I definitely sense something in you Ace-- not just from this post, but from everything I've seen in you over the last few years. I can sense your urgency-- you have a strong drive and possibly some difficulty directing it. I think that leads you to situations you later regret.

We can talk more over email if you would like.

Be well, Ace.

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PeaceAngel
Knowflake

Posts: 1124
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008

posted July 25, 2008 08:50 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for PeaceAngel     Edit/Delete Message
hi f_u

i'm going to step out of the way and let you help ace from here as i feel that is the right thing. thanks.


ace

please take up the offer from future_uncertain and email.

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AceNeerav
Knowflake

Posts: 90
From: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Registered: Apr 2008

posted July 25, 2008 10:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AceNeerav     Edit/Delete Message
hello everyone.

i am not sure what attention deficit disorde is. what i know for sure is i am pretty confused and my doc acknowledges that. my email id is ace.neerav@gmail.com i also sign into google talk messenger with the same id. and am also present on orkut with the same id. how you want to help me is your choice. i really appreciate it.


email is a fantastic idea as after i stopped being friends with Ninad (know-flake The Goat) i havent been emailing a lot.

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AceNeerav
Knowflake

Posts: 90
From: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Registered: Apr 2008

posted July 25, 2008 12:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for AceNeerav     Edit/Delete Message
i read about it in wikipedia and this is something that caught my attention...

In 493 BCE, physician-scientist Hippocrates described a condition that seems to be compatible with what we now know as ADHD. He described patients who had "quickened responses to sensory experience, but also less tenaciousness because the soul moves on quickly to the next impression". Hippocrates attributed this condition to an "overbalance of fire over water”. His remedy for this "overbalance" was "barley rather than wheat bread, fish rather than meat, water drinks, and many natural and diverse physical activities."

interestingly, my indian astrology chart has the following...
Leo Ascendent
Sun, Moon, Jupiter, Uranus and Ketu (south node) in scorpio

important things to note...
sun & jupiter = fire
they are present in a water sign scorpio
also, sun and jupiter ane conjuct moon which rules water.
also, the trouble maker ketu is exact degrees with moon.
also, the combination of leo ascendant (fire) with rashi (moon sign) scorpio (water).
in indian astrology moon sign is considered as the sign.

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Aphrodite
Knowflake

Posts: 5032
From:
Registered: Feb 2002

posted July 25, 2008 11:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aphrodite     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Neerav,

You seem like a genuinely nice person, a little naive, but nonetheless a kind person I would just advise you to be careful in talking to strangers on the internet.

Best Regards,

Aphrodite

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PeaceAngel
Knowflake

Posts: 1124
From: Australia
Registered: May 2008

posted July 25, 2008 11:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PeaceAngel     Edit/Delete Message
ace

i ask the universe to take you to the people and things that can help you as you need to be helped, sweetie.


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AceNeerav
Knowflake

Posts: 90
From: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Registered: Apr 2008

posted July 27, 2008 03:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AceNeerav     Edit/Delete Message
thanks peace.

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AceNeerav
Knowflake

Posts: 90
From: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Registered: Apr 2008

posted July 27, 2008 02:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for AceNeerav     Edit/Delete Message
hey furture, i am waiting. sorry for being impatient.

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future_uncertain
Knowflake

Posts: 2879
From: ohio
Registered: Aug 2004

posted July 28, 2008 09:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for future_uncertain     Edit/Delete Message
Ack! No, you aren't impatient-- I couldn't find the thread. Sorry to keep you waiting. Let me email you tomorrow and then you will have my address.

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CoralFrequency
Knowflake

Posts: 1138
From:
Registered: Feb 2007

posted July 28, 2008 10:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for CoralFrequency     Edit/Delete Message
First of all - I think the urgency is awesome. I love it! But I usually sense that sort of urgency in mutable guys..
And it draws me to them.. simply because it spells: F U N to me.
You have a lot of energy. You probably just need more places to actually use that energy, instead of keeping it bottled up.

I also do not think you are naive. You're VERY VERY sagittarian - in the sense that you are straight forward and honest. Because of that Jupiter good luck, I actually don't think it will get you into trouble.
I wouldn't call this ^ naivety.

I've actually seen - not long ago a few ppl calling a different sagittarian person naive.
I think this comes from a misunderstanding of the basic nature of some people.
In my experience, the Sag person often knows the risks and they KNOW what they're doing (sometimes they pretend they don't for kicks, just to see people's reaction) - but they'll do it anyway because that's just their nature.
They LIKE taking risks. They don't mind.
Life itself is one big risk to Sags - and that's how they want to live it. It isn't out of naivety - It's being a daredevil and taking a chance, just because!

I know you have a Virgo Asc, Neerav - so you probably criticize your own nature - but there are a lot of positives to the Sag side.. and I think you should disregard Virgo sometimes and just move forward fearlessly.

You have a few threads about your family getting on your nerves, but considering the fact that you are all highly fiery people living under the same roof - this is not all that surprising. I wouldn't jump to the conclusion you have a disorder.

Being a double Sag what you'd want and need most is freedom. I think a lot of your problems would melt away once you are living on your own (or with a friend) - rather than your family. Try to put your energy into actually doing this, saving some money and moving into your own place. Fearlessly Don't worry about other things like - whether it will work out, whether you'll have as much money as you do now etc... Things will work out over time, but the 'moving out' step - needs to be taken - in my opinion.

I also think you'll get along much better with everyone in your family, if you don't actually live with them.

:edit: one more thing - you can't afford to be both - FREE- and SPOILT.. and I think you have to pick one.

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future_uncertain
Knowflake

Posts: 2879
From: ohio
Registered: Aug 2004

posted July 29, 2008 01:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for future_uncertain     Edit/Delete Message
CoralFrequency-- I enjoyed your clear insight into the sagittarius psyche. Right on! Are you one, too?

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CoralFrequency
Knowflake

Posts: 1138
From:
Registered: Feb 2007

posted July 29, 2008 02:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for CoralFrequency     Edit/Delete Message
Hi! No, but my bf is a Sagittarius lol

I'm an Aries - close enough

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future_uncertain
Knowflake

Posts: 2879
From: ohio
Registered: Aug 2004

posted July 29, 2008 02:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for future_uncertain     Edit/Delete Message
LOL-- I'm sure he's given you lots of opportunities to perfect your theories!

Sag and Aries can be a funny combination sometimes-- at least with my Aries friends I often get the feeling that deep down they think I'm off my rocker!

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CoralFrequency
Knowflake

Posts: 1138
From:
Registered: Feb 2007

posted July 29, 2008 02:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for CoralFrequency     Edit/Delete Message
hehe You guys can be as off your rocker as you like in my book

If your Aries friends they think you're crazy, it's a good thing!

I have Saturn and Uranus in Sag.. I think the Uranian side pretty much says - all goes in Saggi land, and my cautious Saturn side gets discarded.

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AceNeerav
Knowflake

Posts: 90
From: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Registered: Apr 2008

posted August 02, 2008 05:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AceNeerav     Edit/Delete Message
life did give me a chance to live alone. and i did for like 6 months. i enjoyed it. but it was me who complained about the problems associated with living alone, eg- loneleness, and came home back.

in the process of avoiding legitimate suffering, i invited more suffering!

and if i dont accept this fact that life did give me the chance, i would me fooling around with my self.

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