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Author Topic:   Me and the ex-boyfriend
MysticMelody
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posted August 24, 2010 12:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
9-28-71 me
8-3-70 he

1987 us

His Venus, Saturn, and Pluto trine my Moon.
His Sun and Mars sextile my Venus.

His Venus conjuct my Mercury...
I think that is what I loved most of all.

His Uranus conjunct my Sun and trine my Saturn
at zero degrees each.

His Leo smile still warms my heart decades later.

His Venus conjunct my Pluto...

I left him over twenty years ago, spoke to him a couple times on FB over the last week, and at this moment feel like I'm still a little in love with him. His Venus and Saturn trine my moon? I feel loving emotion towards him and his sweet gestures and words and it is as if the love I had for him was just dried up... and now with a little water/emotion it is active again. I suddenly feel like the love I had for him never left. Like I could lay down next to him and go to sleep at peace.
Obviously a Saturn thing because I have no logical reason to "feel" that way. He's a decent guy, of course, but this loving feeling is a little disproportionate to the situation. Maybe being in love with my youth is the real powerful love.
Anyway... still pondering it. Just sharing the flood of thought and emotions along with the astro info for your research, knowledge, and consideration.

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mermaid26
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posted August 24, 2010 09:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for mermaid26     Edit/Delete Message
Love and logic don't seem to go together so very well from my perspective. I don't know, listen to some of Bono's lyrics (Gem.Sun/Mars/Pis) and you'll be even more confused. (sorry my Venus is Aqua) Sometimes we can't see the forest through the trees thingy.

I do hope you get some clarity. This came to me... lots of good words hidden in Cathedral ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PzJehXseMhA

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MysticMelody
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posted August 24, 2010 09:57 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
I didn't hear any words... are you putting a mermaid spell on me?

I got his birth time this morning... my Saturn squares his moon. I can feel all of these moon connections, that is for sure. I used to think that the reason I had such strong feelings for boys in my youth was simply because of my youth... but now, twenty years later, I feel an immediate stroooooong emotional connection. That is obviously what Moon connections do... and I STILL feel it, probably because of Saturn.

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Nephthys
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posted August 24, 2010 12:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nephthys     Edit/Delete Message
I totally do not want to burst your bubble, but in my experience Saturn square Moon feels like a wet blanket......even with all the other wonderfully gorgeous aspects, (believe me, I know) you are smitten and so happy and contagious for one another, BUT that Saturn square Moon is most often an obstacle........... it sucks.........

I hope you are not upset with my response!!! Just that I've experienced it too, and I believe in giving an honest response and I don't sugar coat everything.

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Nine
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posted August 24, 2010 05:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nine     Edit/Delete Message
You didn't put up charts with times so my calculation may be off, but...

In 1987 your pMoon was in Leo conjunct his nMoon, nSun, & pSun.

Now, in 2010 your pMoon is in Cancer and about to re-enter Leo and once again conjunct his nMoon & nSun in Leo.

This is what I believe is triggering the memories.

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Nephthys
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posted August 24, 2010 05:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nephthys     Edit/Delete Message
Awesome, Nine!!!

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MysticMelody
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posted August 24, 2010 11:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
Oh no, Nep... no bubble bursting. I just recently had a healing experience with another ex and I imagine this will be the same. But it does feel so good to revisit the love feelings. They were so strong when I was a teenager...

I am going to read again what you said and apply it like a good student.

I had been wishing recently that I had the charts of long ago boyfriends so I could see what deep connections and long term relationships looked like for me in my past synastries. I am interested in pondering the progression thing. I was thinking all of this had to do with Saturn's cycle somehow since the other ex recently found me a month or two ago.

As for the Leo ex I am talking to now... I just feel pure love. Regardless of what it is... it feels nice, and healing, and home. ♥

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MysticMelody
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posted August 25, 2010 12:03 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
Nine, my time is 3:02pm and his is 10:30pm.

I'm sure your calculations are close enough... it makes me wonder how any relationships can last when things are always progressing and leaving aspect. I guess that is why we tell young people that things change and you have to let the other person grow.

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MysticMelody
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posted August 25, 2010 09:07 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
Stayed up most of all night on the phone...

it's like we just picked back up with the fight after the break-up! All the emotions still there with just some distance and a little memory loss!!! I finally got to say the things he wouldn't hear and we were both saying sorry etc... it was freaking surreal.

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Nephthys
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posted August 25, 2010 12:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nephthys     Edit/Delete Message
quote:
As for the Leo ex I am talking to now... I just feel pure love. Regardless of what it is... it feels nice, and healing, and home.

I know what you mean, the feeling of home.......

Maybe you were thinking of him and now talking to him b/c your soul is going through a "cleansing".... and you are processing these past issues with him....getting things off your chest.....freeing yourself by eliminating past karma..... so you can move on to bigger and better things/lessons/experiences in your life

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mermaid26
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posted August 27, 2010 09:50 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for mermaid26     Edit/Delete Message
Hey MM, I like the relationship articles from this site. I'm wishing positivity for you in your relationships.
http://omtimes.com/category/relationships/

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MysticMelody
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posted August 27, 2010 10:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
I am trying the OM site, mermaid, but it isn't loading any articles.

Well, ex-Leo obviously has some issues over our break-up TWENTY-THREE years ago and although this has all played out like some strange movie scripted by God (I know all life's experiences are, but this one is TOO obvious in every respect) it still has me stunned that he would pick up the relationship at the point of the break-up, and after reading a box full of letters he had written to the girlfriend he had before me (who he was "friends" with while we were together, which the letters somewhat prove and he had only ever kissed her once at camp or some-such but that's a whole 'nother story... including the fact that he almost married her years after we broke up and she ended up sending back his letters when he said he didn't love her during some problems they were having while she was PLANNING THEIR WEDDING...) he then calls me after celebrating buying his own business (earlier that day), at 11pm when he has been drinking and reads these letters to me where he writes about his broken heart (to her after he and I broke up) and writes all of these insights about our relationship which he had long since forgotten but which I had brought up a few days ago (talking about how young we were and the mistakes we both made etc) and he gets all emotional and HANGS UP ON ME.

Freaking drama King Leo.

So I just stare at the phone in astonishment, roll my eyes, unplug it so I can go back to sleep and of course don't say anything to him the next day. He says nothing as well and then writes me this morning at 9 am saying he is going to call me tonight. I didn't respond, though I have been online so he is probably not going to call, but STILL I have to unplug my phone before I go to sleep in case he calls later. I wonder if he is a drunk or something and that is why he isn't married. He seems relatively successful and has a super nice sports car (I think, it is black and shiny and was shaped like a newer car, I guess) so I thought my biggest problem if we got together would be that he might not be able to handle my simpler (poorer) lifestyle. It never occurred to me that he could drink too much or something.

Anyway, the hang up reminded me that he caused a bit of drama in my life back in the day and I know I don't want to revisit that. I wonder if this is just a burst of energy being healed or if he really is super immature.

hmm...

I wonder what I'm supposed to learn here now... probably to say goodbye with love? Who knows.

Do you have to pay for these articles or something?? I have tried so many times, it looked like such a good site!!

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katatonic
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posted August 28, 2010 10:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for katatonic     Edit/Delete Message
maybe you are supposed to learn that you broke up for a reason, and going backward is impossible?

(your saturn sq his moon is all over what you just said about him...and for leos having their hearts stifled is truly deadly)

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MysticMelody
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posted August 28, 2010 11:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
Ok, it is the burst of energy and healing... he has written me a beautiful long letter and explained that his phone died and he thought it best just to leave it at that since he was emotional that night. He had mentioned earlier that his phone was dying and I had forgotten. He just used to hurt my heart so much being a careless young man. I guess I am back in the pain and the growth too. I am very good at putting up walls, barriers, towers, castles, with moats, and sea monsters... to protect myself.
He knows I am talking to "my friends on my spiritual message board" and he doesn't mind. He just asks what you all say. He doesn't understand astrology though. Yet. Give me time.
I came back here in the middle of composing my reply to look up something I said about how this feels to me.
This is going somewhere and wherever it is going there is no stopping the love so please explain more about moon square saturn and how I can take it to the highest vibration. ♥♥♥

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MysticMelody
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posted August 28, 2010 11:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
Also, I was pretty hurt and annoyed that I let myself be hurt again when I wrote the above letter where I was upset about the late night call, the hang up, and the drama. I just didn't want to be sucked back into that again. I guess both of us are having strong reactions to all of this.

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MysticMelody
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posted August 28, 2010 12:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
Also, he signed his letter "love," and I did too. ♥

I was thinking of this song earlier this week when we first started talking but I was thinking it didn't quite fit because our conversation never lags and there was no emptiness... and then I posted it on FB the day after he hung up on me because I thought maybe the connection was just in my mind. His letter today absolutely shows me the connection wasn't all me or in my imagination, but I still love this song. ♥ We are trying to reach through 23 years.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Y8ag_Prj24

Same Old Lang Syne

Met my old lover in the grocery store
The snow was falling Christmas eve
I stole behind her in the frozen foods
And I touched her on the sleeve

She didn't recognize the face at first
But then her eyes flew open wide
She went to hug me and she spilled her purse
And we laughed until we cried

We took her groceries to the checkout stand
The food was totaled up and bagged
We stood there lost in our embarrassment
As the conversation dragged

We went to have ourselves a drink or two
But couldn't find an open bar
We bought a six-pack at the liquor store
And we drank it in her car

We drank a toast to innocence, we drank a toast to now
And tried to reach beyond the emptiness but neither one knew how

She said she'd married her an architect
Who kept her warm and safe and dry
She would have liked to say she loved the man
But she didn't like to lie

I said the years had been a friend to her
And that her eyes were still as blue
But in those eyes I wasn't sure if I saw doubt or gratitude

She said she saw me in the record stores
And that I must be doing well
I said the audience was heavenly but the traveling was hell

We drank a toast to innocence, we drank a toast to now
And tried to reach beyond the emptiness but neither one knew how
We drank a toast to innocence, we drank a toast to time
Reliving in our eloquence, another auld lang syne

The beer was empty and our tongues were tired
Running out of things to say
She gave a kiss to me as I got out
And I watched her drive away

Just for a moment I was back at school
And felt that old familiar pain
And as I turned to make my way back home
The snow turned in to rain

~~~ Dan Fogelberg ~~~ http://everon.info/same_old_lang_syne.htm

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Diana
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posted August 28, 2010 06:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Diana     Edit/Delete Message
I'm still confused at why he was mad at you. How/why did you break up with him?


I swear, men hold grudges forever. I know they say women do, but in my experience it is the men.


If he isn't over it after 23 freaking years, he never will be. Was what you did that bad or does he just hold onto everything? Because if he can't let anything go, be prepared for hell if you two are together. He'll throw every fight from decades ago into your face. If this is the case, and the type of person he is, you have to ask yourself if you can be with someone so immature and unevolved. If what you did was really bad, then maybe you two shouldn't be together, because he obviously can't let it go. if it wasn't that bad, but he's just holding onto it, then you may be able to move past it.


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MysticMelody
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posted August 28, 2010 11:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message
Who knows...
What I do know is that this is already a deep and intense experience and God knows I love those... and I constantly lament (during chick flick moments, of course) that I can never have that experience of being with the love from my youth. But now there appears to be a glimmer of hope. So, I'm immersing myself in the chance.
Especially since I always feel like I'll never be able to find someone I know enough and trust enough to actually have them around my daughter in a family sort of way. I always think that it will be five years at least before I know someone enough to fully trust them and by then she will be a teenager and will have missed the chance to have any sort of "family" other than the two of us. ("This is my family. I found it, all on my own. Is little, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good." ~Stitch from the movie Lilo and Stitch) So to be able to possibly build on a relationship with an existing foundation with someone I trust deep in my soul is very attractive. There are so many things I have learned since I was 17....

I don't know. But I'm sure God has good things in mind for me. S/He always does. ♥

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cpn_edgar_winner
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posted August 31, 2010 10:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cpn_edgar_winner     Edit/Delete Message
this here leo will always love you! don't you ever forget it!

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MysticMelody
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posted August 31, 2010 10:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MysticMelody     Edit/Delete Message

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