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Author Topic:   A SOULFUL RELATIONSHIP
ALeonine
Knowflake

Posts: 303
From:
Registered: Apr 2006

posted March 21, 2007 05:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ALeonine     Edit/Delete Message
Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye. Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem, make you blind to warning signs.

Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults isn't really important.
Once you decide to commit to someone, over time his or her flaws, vulnerabilities, pet peeves, and differences will become more obvious.

If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've got to learn to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you.

You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values, dreams, weaknesses, and strengths.
You are two unique individual children of God who have decided to share a life together.

Neither of you are perfect, but are you perfect for each other?
Do you bring out the best in each other?
Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or Do you compete, compare, and control?
What do you bring to the relationship?
Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past mistakes, past pain?...

You can't take someone to the altar to alter him or her.
You can't make someone love you or make someone stay.
If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and 'a life', you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain.

Manipulation, control, jealousy, anger, neediness, and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship.
Seeking status, sex, wealth, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

What keeps a relationship strong?...
* Communication, intimacy, trust, a sense of
humor, sharing household tasks and
responsibilities, some get-away time
without business or children and daily
exchanges ( a meal, shared activity, a
hug, a call, a touch, a note).
* Leave a nice message on the voicemail or
send a nice email.
* Talk..
* Sharing common goals and interests.
* Growth is important.
* Grow together, not away from each other,
giving each other space to grow without
feeling insecure.
* Allow your mate to have outside interest.
You can't always be together.
* Give each other a sense of belonging and
assurances of commitment.
* Don't try to control one another.
* Learn each other's family situation.
* Respect his or her parents regardless.
* Don't put pressure on each other for
material goods.
* Remember for richer and poorer.

If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty, pain replace the passion.

The difference between "United" and "Untied" is where you put the "I"

~By Rev. Ronald McFadden

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Sheaa Olein
Knowflake

Posts: 2864
From: London
Registered: Jul 2004

posted March 21, 2007 05:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sheaa Olein     Edit/Delete Message
Thank you ALeonine, you're an angel

------------------
"There is no remedy for love but to love more." Henry David Thoreau

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ListensToTrees
Knowflake

Posts: 3844
From: Infinity
Registered: Jul 2005

posted March 21, 2007 06:30 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ListensToTrees     Edit/Delete Message
So, true, so true!

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ALeonine
Knowflake

Posts: 303
From:
Registered: Apr 2006

posted March 21, 2007 06:47 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ALeonine     Edit/Delete Message
I know...am still learning....

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Sheaa Olein
Knowflake

Posts: 2864
From: London
Registered: Jul 2004

posted March 21, 2007 07:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sheaa Olein     Edit/Delete Message
Aren't we all

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ALeonine
Knowflake

Posts: 303
From:
Registered: Apr 2006

posted March 21, 2007 07:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ALeonine     Edit/Delete Message
Oh yeah Sheaa

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