Its okay to be a 'debbie downer' for a while. Sometimes we have to feel an aversion to something before we will retract our energies and actions from patterns we want to stop so we can change them.When Pluto opposed my natal Venus-Mars in the mid-90s, I fell in love intensely - twice. Neither ended well. It triggered a lot of anxiety, fear, depression, and health issues. But I survived and learned a lot from it and I'm in a good place today.
Usually we want to place the nice outcomes we want up front as the earliest result of our aims and efforts, but in reality they usually come after some learning experiences that are necessary to get there.
Just be careful of turning such disappointed generalizations as "... I genuinely feel like men are not capable of falling in love ..." into beliefs that become blocks.
Pluto transits opposite/contra-parallel, square, even conjunct/parallel natal Moon or Venus bring intense unconscious forces slowly into play in a way that lets us see more of what is stored within us, but takes the form of interactions that stir up things we cannot control. This is part of the function of Pluto in my view, to help us see how powerful our inner drives are and that certain things cannot be consciously controlled (others' choices or reactions).
The whole point is transformation, but these hard transits sometimes seem to bring only destruction. I assure you, from far on the 'other side' of such transits that is not the case.
Think of it as remodeling a home. Sometimes a wall has to be knocked out and a bunch of dust and grime and disorder is let loose before the room is freed up to reshape the place. All this seems as if a bull dozer has suddenly appeared at random and started wreaking havoc on our lives. This is why it is important to have developed a vision for who you want to become, or at least start developing it. Otherwise, these experiences can leave us cynical, and permanently a 'downer.'
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