The exact conjunction of my Twin's NESSUS and my NNODE proved years of emotional abuse. Which I just took, mind. Because 'reasons'. I guess it was because of how much it reminded me of these two. http://youtu.be/ZUQJKMngrYo
That was the crux of our initial argument, too. He worried about ratings, and I wanted to do GOOD TV, as opposed to the tripe you see on most broadcast (if not all) networks. And, of course, though McAvoy's a news anchor, and he was a stand up comic, both have the issue of needing a large group of strangers to 'love' them.
All in all, we shelved our own show, barring the very likelihood of outbreaks like this one ...
http://youtu.be/SQ1EmYonDjk
(Of which a mini-version already occurred in 2012.) I do recall I actually said, 'Jesus Christ, how much do you hate me?' and don't remember if it's just what I'd normally say, or if I had the scene pop into my head. (Ohhh, life in Hollyweird.)
This is the one that always sticks in my mind, though, even more than all of the others.
http://youtu.be/1qnZPXBOWU0
Which I recall as 'say what you want to say to me.' Which ends up going about as you might expect, with characters who have such a history.
Maybe it all hits home really hard to me because I'm both a TV writer and created similar characters with him back in 2005. Nonetheless ... hard it does hit.
At the end of the day, it was too much. Unlike being borne of Sorkin's pen, I was in charge of my own happy ending or tragic one. The series ended a year after we shelved our own show, and we watched it together from a distance 'til the end. Sometimes very awkwardly. Other times, weird isolated bits of truth would sneak through his cynical exterior -- and vanish just as suddenly, leaving me with the confusion as to whether or not they were ever there to begin with.
So I moved on. Looking back, I can't believe how much of it I took. How I withstood it for almost a decade. Day in, day out. His barbs -- his endless, wounding barbs. If I stop to reflect upon it, I either ball up my fists or cry.
No happy ending there. Just moving on.
As usual, if someone's evolved, their NESSUS will act in a transcending, taboo-breaking, barrier-busting fashion. They won't seek to harm you; they won't be ruthless -- or ruthless against you.
They'll be more akin to my boyfriend, whose NESSUS squares my ASC/VENUS. Bringing a bouquet of white roses, in apology (for having to end our relationship years ago), before a crowd of friends completely not in-the-know of anything, and still entirely unabashed. He cared, but he didn't; the only thing in that moment that mattered was that I knew how much he loves me, and how much pain he was truly in.
Frankly, that's the reason he is the one to whom I always returned. Who's NEVER treated me with anything but respect, and conducts himself with total honesty.
I gave my Twin a chance. Many, many chances. At the end of the day, I wanted to be loved. He can't do that.
For me, it feels like that NESSUS conjunct NNODE (0º40).
But I could be wrong.