Author
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Topic: Why Is It That When One Sleeps With A Man...
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Xena Moderator Posts: 398 From: UK Registered: Jun 2006
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posted October 20, 2006 11:11 AM
...one ceases to become of any importance to them whatsoever? Why do guys just want me for my looks (and nothing else), and why do I only seem to attract guys who want an FWB, rather than someone who would actually appreciate seeing me at least twice a week? I can't help being good-looking - but they fail to appreciate that I do actually have feelings! What am I doing wrong? Help appreciated (esp. from guys). IP: Logged |
hot_ice Knowflake Posts: 1012 From: Registered: Oct 2004
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posted October 20, 2006 12:06 PM
that depends on if the guy likes you or not,If i really like the girl I'll stick with her,else it's only physical,and once thats done bye bye!normal human tendencies... IP: Logged |
Mama Mia Knowflake Posts: 2320 From: Registered: Jun 2005
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posted October 20, 2006 12:12 PM
Well how soon after meeting these guys do you give it up..Make em wait for it and then you will find out who is in for the long haul or what..Also beauty is only skin deep. There are a million goodlooking women walking around. I don't think being so good looking has anything to really do with a man totally staying. Yes that is what attracts most but not totally what keeps them. You sound like me about 15 years ago I was and still am very attractive to the opposite sex and kept men around me all the time but seemed to be having the same problem that you are having. Make em wait awhile before you go there is my strongest suggestion to you.. IP: Logged |
sue g Knowflake Posts: 8591 From: former land of the leprechaun Registered: Sep 2004
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posted October 20, 2006 12:41 PM
Dont do it at ALL!!!! Seriously though, for a lot of blokes, the heat is off once they have you in the sack.... I would make them wait as long as ye can!!!!! That is REALLY hard when you are passionate too....but I honestly think if I was single again, I wouldnt be so eager to give myself to a guy, so quickly!! Good luck sweetie... p.s. wheres my music... IP: Logged |
BlueRoamer Knowflake Posts: 3944 From: Calm Blue Ocean, Calm Blue Ocean Registered: Jun 2003
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posted October 20, 2006 01:23 PM
Ya I was gonna say what Sue said! Leave it to scorpio natives to understand the controlling power of sex (muhahah)Here's the logic: 1.Any guy worth his salt who likes you for you will stick around forever, and won't care if you ever have sex with him. 2. Any guy not worth his salt will get bored and move on after he realizes you're not gonna sleep with him right away. These men I like to call slutwhores. So all you have to do is not give into their pressure. Be a diva about it, say "nuh uh no way honey" and wave ur hand in the air.
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Kamilla Knowflake Posts: 860 From: NJ USA Registered: Apr 2006
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posted October 20, 2006 01:24 PM
I dunno...according to my personal experience men REALLY do like sex...lol... and never fail to come back for more. As for good looks, it gives you a priceless opportunity of being a "tease" and it is SO-O much fun It's a cliche but true... they'll be after you as soon as you stop going after them Good Luck! IP: Logged |
sue g Knowflake Posts: 8591 From: former land of the leprechaun Registered: Sep 2004
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posted October 20, 2006 03:49 PM
Quote:"""So all you have to do is not give into their pressure. Be a diva about it, say "nuh uh no way honey" and wave ur hand in the air""" You is a clever one BlueRoamer..... And you read my mind daaaaarling....xxx IP: Logged |
Kamilla Knowflake Posts: 860 From: NJ USA Registered: Apr 2006
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posted October 20, 2006 04:36 PM
here is the thread "everything you always wanted to know about men" If you have time to read 17 pages, I think we got pretty much every aspect covered...lol http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/009047.html Sue, you remember that, right? Scorpio brothel...lol IP: Logged |
breezey93 Knowflake Posts: 116 From: sandy eggo Registered: Oct 2006
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posted October 20, 2006 05:10 PM
Man here: Many men are into the conquest of the opposite sex. But if the man is smitten beyond the conquest of course he'll stay. The problem can be that a woman will not 'feel it' and the man comes on too strong. I know it's very simple advice but...WAIT HIM OUT. If he really wants more than sex he'll prove it too you. I speak from experience as an ex-horndog. For that period in life I was totally into getting the girl in bed for the sheer pleasure of conquest. I got bored easily of the same person and wanted variety--commitment meant nothing! I know now we reap what we sow and I am thankful I awoke from this before it consumed me. I have asked for forgiveness and feel the desire is sublimated. Best wishes for you that you find a man and not a boy who likes to play. IP: Logged |
Happy Dragon Knowflake Posts: 2886 From: Registered: Apr 2005
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posted October 20, 2006 07:25 PM
** one ceases to become of any importance to them whatsoever?** * * Why do guys just want me for my looks (and nothing else), and why do I only seem to attract guys who want an FWB, rather than someone who would actually appreciate seeing me at least twice a week? **the answer to that could maybe be found in your astrology chart .. as in .. what do the guys think they see .. or what might you be subconciously projecting .. .. where or in what sort of social enviroment do you meet these guys .. ... i can appreciate what your saying as i've come across that as a guy .. as in realising the lass just wanted me for the physical sex .. which is a bit of a turnoff for moi .. ... ... or .. ... .. is it a case of the motivation being sexual physical pleasure and resulting in dissapoinment due to one thing or another .. i mean there are things in that department that can have folk avoiding each other when it comes to shagging .. if the sexual experience was akin to watching wet paint dry would there be motivation for wanting more ? .. i shall avoid a list of sexual turnoffs for now .. .. is alchohol involved here ?? i mean are they p****d as newts by the time it comes to that precious moment .. are you somewhat drunk when you go to it ?? ** What am I doing wrong? ** .. saying Yes to the wrong type maybe ?? .. from the point of realy knowing what your doing in the sack .. apart from experience .. this aint such a bad starting point .. it's a book called " Sexual Energy Ecstasy by David and Ellen Ramsdale" .. Bantam New Age Books ... .. if the query is why do you attract guys who just want a shag and nowt more .. then have a good look at how you might come accross to them when meeting up initialy .. .. what age group are the guys generaly ???? .. are they the type to read the back pages of the sunday tabloids ?? .. i mean generaly speaking what sort of guys are they ??? if it's an emotional relationship plus good sex your looking for .. then choose the guys carefully and make sure they know what you want or don't want beforehand .. make them wait .. don't say 'yes yes yes' at a moments notice .. spend time to find out exactly what their motivations for getting to know you are .. .. the path to a mans heart is not always via what lays between his legs .. although much of the media output would have one thinking so ... maybe post your astrology data .. it may help ..
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lovely* Knowflake Posts: 2141 From: CA Registered: Jul 2003
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posted October 20, 2006 11:02 PM
quote: Be a diva about it, say "nuh uh no way honey" and wave ur hand in the air.
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MysticMelody Moderator Posts: 3521 From: Registered: Dec 2005
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posted October 21, 2006 12:14 AM
Read "Mars and Venus On a Date", it's not a bible to live by, but he makes some good points and answers some of your questions. It's an easy read and you can get it at the library. The basic principal seems to be that sex can either be just a physical thing with an emotional "nothing", or it can be something that creates an immediate emotional bond. Since men aren't usually into emotional bonding with someone they have just met (it's just not logical to do that) then they more often will choose the Nothing. If you want a man to desire an emotional bond with you, you have to give him some time to get to know you, which could take months, a year, whatever, depending on how quickly and deeply your friendship develops.Here's your new song, beautiful: Don't Tell Me "You held my hand and walked me home, I know Why you gave me that kiss It was something like this and made me go ooh ooh You wiped my tears, got rid of all my fears Why did you have to go? Guess it wasn't enough to take up some of my love Guys are so hard to trust Did I not tell you that I'm not like that girl, the one who gives it all away, yeah.. Did you think that I was gonna give it up to you, this time? Did you think that it was somethin' I was gonna do and cry? Don't try to tell me what to do Don't try to tell me what to say You're better off that way, yeah Don't think that your charm And the fact that your arm is now around my neck Will get you in my pants, I'll have to kick your ass And make you never forget I'm gonna ask you to stop Thought I liked you a lot But I'm really upset (really upset) Get out of my head, get off of my bed Yeah, that's what I said Did I not I tell you that I'm not like that girl, the one who throws it all away Did you think that I was gonna give it up to you, this time? Did you think that it was somethin' I was gonna do and cry? Don't try to tell me what to do Don't try to tell me what to say You're better off that way, yeah This guilt trip that you put me on Won't mess me up, I've done no wrong Any thoughts of you and me have gone away Did you think that I was gonna give it up to you, this time? Did you think that it was somethin' I was gonna do and cry? Don't try to tell me what to do Don't try to tell me what to say You're better off that way, yeah you're better off that way I'm better off alone anyway"
------------------ "Did you ever get the chance to dance along the light of day?" IP: Logged |
MysticMelody Moderator Posts: 3521 From: Registered: Dec 2005
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posted October 21, 2006 12:15 AM
Oh, "Don't Tell Me" vocals by Avril LavigneIP: Logged |
Happy Dragon Knowflake Posts: 2886 From: Registered: Apr 2005
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posted October 21, 2006 10:39 AM
Ram Tiger .. .. check out an album by Hanne Boel called Dark Passions .. be a song there called "if you want my body" .. the refrain goes .. 'if you want my body then make love to my mind' .. i searched for the lyrics but couldn't find them on the net ... hanne boel be a danish singer ..
------------------ ( audio .. www.happydragon.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/jkbx/audiofls.html .. ) "If you don't like my peaches, please don't shake my tree" .. Elmore James .. IP: Logged |
and unregistered
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posted October 21, 2006 10:44 AM
quote: 'if you want my body then make love to my mind'
LOVE THIS QUOTE!!! Nothing is hotter than someone who can mentally stimulate me....
------------------ "WHATEVER the soul longs for, WILL be attained by the spirit" "Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation" -Khalil Gibran IP: Logged |
sue g Knowflake Posts: 8591 From: former land of the leprechaun Registered: Sep 2004
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posted October 21, 2006 11:27 AM
Hey KamYou have a very GOOD memory girl...... IP: Logged |
sue g Knowflake Posts: 8591 From: former land of the leprechaun Registered: Sep 2004
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posted October 21, 2006 11:28 AM
and....I love that quote too..... No wonder phone sex is on the up... x
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Mirandee Knowflake Posts: 4812 From: South of the Thumb - Taurus, Pisces, Cancer Registered: Sep 2004
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posted October 21, 2006 12:23 PM
Love that quote too, And. When it comes down to it you hold a man's interest more for the kind of person you are than how you look and in the long run if you can't communicate with someone it grows tiresome for both parties in a relationship. HD, I agree, it is more likely what is being projected subconsciouly through the body language that might be the problem. Men have built in radar for things like that. Make it harder for the guys. Men are like water, they always take the path of least resistance. They go for what is easy for them on the most part but when it comes to a serious, real relationship I think that men like a challenge. Looks get the attention of men but it won't hold them. It takes more substance to hold their attention. IP: Logged |
Happy Dragon Knowflake Posts: 2886 From: Registered: Apr 2005
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posted October 21, 2006 02:42 PM
Hanne Boel .. 1st one is original .. 2nd a cover version of a rock classic4.6 megs .. / stereo / 160 bit rate .. "if you want my body" http://www.happydragon.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/jkbx/lovemymind.mp3 4.7megs / stereo / 160 bit rate .. http://www.happydragon.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/jkbx/makelove.mp3 Hanne Boel .. Born 31st August 1957 in Bagsværd, Copenhagen, Denmark http://www.hanneboel.dk/uk/biography/ enjoy .. Mirandee re: * I agree, it is more likely what is being projected subconsciouly * .. mmmmm .. methinks they are picking up on transits .. as in the transits are effecting X's emotions .. and they will be projected onto the observer .. par for the course .. i'm only saying that as recently i was sent an interp of my nodes placement .. and unfortunately it was spot on .. was a real eye opener as it contained something that i realy dislike abut myself .. but know to be true .. and i know i project it sometime even though i wish i wouldn't .. men are like water ?? .. not this guy .. with sat opp venus i have a habit of climbing up a self made mountain to reach any creative objective ... i.e. always seem to take the difficult route .. but with hard work comes knowledge gained .. ... just been playing some bottleneck blues on the guittar .. .. hard slogg seems to be paying off .. :-) H.D.
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Battle of Evermore Knowflake Posts: 1145 From: Registered: Sep 2004
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posted October 21, 2006 06:23 PM
To me, I agree with C.S. Lewis...Need love is like when you want something so badly, and you can't live without it, but once you get it, you don't want it anymore. Like a thirsty man wants water, but once he gets what he needs to quence his thirst, he's not going to keep drinking it just because. Gift love is when you're perfectly happy, and walking along in a meadow and you happen to come across something extaordinary, like a field with a great fragrance. It just made the happiness that you already had just that much better, and you never even felt like you needed it, it was just a plus to what you already had. I think that waiting will give the guy test enough what kind of love you're getting from him.
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Xena Moderator Posts: 398 From: UK Registered: Jun 2006
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posted October 29, 2006 09:16 AM
The thing is I and this particular guy that I've been seeing get on really well, and have been seeing each other for some months now, on and off, but he isn't over his ex yet and figures he's not ready for any sort of normal relationship right now. For now we have agreed to be friends only since it appears that it's that particular mental block that seems to be in the way...plus the fact I refuse to be an FWB. Bear in mind my husband was my first relationship and I honestly haven't had a lot of guys; at this point in time I seem to be in the process of finding certain things out, and having various thoughts and theories confirmed...just throwing myself into hobbies for now and hoping I'll meet some nice, artistic guy one day who will love me for me. Interesting what is mentioned about the body language, I do look rather Piscean and ethereal due to a preponderance of Pisces in my chart...sort of water-nymph type but, ahem, *sexy* as well...I must say I dress with intent, which is perhaps slightly confusing for guys...I do have a desire to seduce, though I want them to want all of me - if this makes sense. I also do have a desire to please men and create something of a dream for them - although in a sense I want something back, so it's not exactly one-sided. Anyway, the unequivocal message here seems to be: talk first, and keep them on their toes... IP: Logged |
sue g Knowflake Posts: 8591 From: former land of the leprechaun Registered: Sep 2004
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posted October 29, 2006 09:49 AM
Keep them on their toes indeed dear lady.... Enjoy....!! And remember always keep a little bit hidden....
p.s. I have never quite understood the concept of the FWB thing....doesnt having sex with another make them yer lover???
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aqua inferno Knowflake Posts: 1106 From: hopping about Europe Registered: Oct 2006
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posted October 30, 2006 07:07 AM
quote: ...one ceases to become of any importance to them whatsoever? Why do guys just want me for my looks (and nothing else), and why do I only seem to attract guys who want an FWB, rather than someone who would actually appreciate seeing me at least twice a week? I can't help being good-looking - but they fail to appreciate that I do actually have feelings! What am I doing wrong? Help appreciated (esp. from guys).
Love your confidence UK guys are idiots anyway - I once got asked if I was a Russian/Latvian whatever wh*re …and how much…when I was in Manchester And in London, I get asked where I’m from - thinking because I look foreign…I must be some easy b*tch I’m over UK guys *runs away to Estonia* scratch that *runs to Czech rep.* ------------------ aka WaterNymph pisces/virgo/pisces/aquarius/aries/aries IP: Logged |
Atlenta Knowflake Posts: 401 From: Registered: Jun 2002
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posted November 04, 2006 02:26 AM
quote: Need love is like when you want something so badly, and you can't live without it, but once you get it, you don't want it anymore. Like a thirsty man wants water, but once he gets what he needs to quence his thirst, he's not going to keep drinking it just because.Gift love is when you're perfectly happy, and walking along in a meadow and you happen to come across something extaordinary, like a field with a great fragrance. It just made the happiness that you already had just that much better, and you never even felt like you needed it, it was just a plus to what you already had.
This is so true. Gift love is the best, like a bonus present. Can't wait till I an the other can experience that. I think "need" love might be the reason why frustrating mind games are played.. push-pull effects. ------------------ The kingdom of Heaven lies within - J.C IP: Logged |