posted December 23, 2002 05:05 AM              

O astral cohort,
When love's ideals
poured forth from
lips benevolent
did you proffer your brow
to be kissed?
When Logos
burrowed deep and
flourished bright
in the bridechamber
of Sophia
did space-time
and all things ephemeral
like quicksilver
transfigure
into that which
is eternal?

Tell me,
O creature of the moment,
in the gardens of Olympus
did the healing potions
of the wise Centaur
make whole
the fragmented light-spark
that is Castor and Pollux?
For here in the soul-expanse
in perfect symmetry
linked,
as arranged by the Fates
Mind and Spirit
in the depths
of a burnished heart.

um, ok, carlo, how goes it so far?
did my homework.

Gemini = rules mind
Sag = rules spirit

thought about writing from the point of view of a gemini, though.

my use of 'logos' and 'sophia' is based only on their superficial (not higher/spiritual) definitions, i.e., logos referring to reason and material knowledge as accumulated and communicated; sophia referring to wisdom.

err… didn't realize until after I'd written it that the action of logos in sophia could have another meaning.

posted December 23, 2002 11:31 AM              

That is such a wonderfully written poem. It is artistically and intellectually beautiful. I love it. I am saving a copy of it for myself.

Thank you for writing that.

posted December 23, 2002 12:30 PM              

Yes, it could be present tense, if you preferred, yet past is better I think because you are invoking images of the ancient past, so I think it works better.

The only Virgo comments I would make is that in the first couple lines, wine rhymes with divine (e.g, "and cavorted maids divine"), in case you liked that, yet that is just a Virgo-eye thing, the poem is exellent in every way! Let's see how it looks in present tense anyway, and all caps at the beginning of each line...

In fields Elysian
Where flow ambrosial wine
And cavort famed divinities,
Does the sage Chiron
Rest his learned gaze
Upon radiant Castor and Pollux?

For there in the night sky
Immortalizes,
The noble Archer
And scintillating twin orbs,
Perches,
As decreed by the Fates
On the edges
Of a celestial arbor.

O astral cohort,
When love's ideals
Pour forth from
Lips benevolent
Do you proffer your brow
To be kissed?

When Logos
Burrows deep and
Flourishes bright
In the bridechamber
Of Sophia,
Do space-time
And all things ephemeral
Like quicksilver
Transfigure
Into that which
Is eternal?

Tell me,
O creature of the moment,
In the gardens of Olympus
Do the healing potions
Of the wise Centaur
make whole
The fragmented light-spark
That is Castor and Pollux?

For here in the soul-expanse
In perfect symmetry linked,
As arranged by the Fates
Mind and Spirit
In the depths
Of a burnished heart.

***

Also, the last stanza, there is no verb. Did you mean to write one of the "in"s as an "is"? Would you like to give the poem a name?

I don't know now, present looks pretty good too! What do you think? I like past better.

Yes, if you could do a poem by Gemini to Sag, that would be sweet, since I don't even know one Gemini, boy or girl, in Lindaland. I just find it to be a nice way to learn more about one's opposite, just by doing a poem. If you do two, you will get a gold star on your forehead for the rest of the year Thank you again taj, it is just brilliant.

posted December 23, 2002 02:14 PM              

http://lovestarz.com/connect.html

Aphrodite, are you going to do one on Cancer Woman/Cappy Man? Where are all the non-Virgo Earth signs and all the Water signs? So far it's mostly the Fire and Air sign girls who are being prolific here. Anyone else even thinking about it? Take your time trippy, perfection cannot be rushed

Taj and others who have made poems, please let me know if you have any feelings about how the poem looks on the page I am making. I can make any changes you like, so if you dont like a pic or something, just say so

posted December 23, 2002 02:24 PM              

Where did you get me being a Cancer Woman?

I am Aries Sun

I have yet to be with a Libra Man . . . so I don't have anything to contribute with regard to opposites.

posted December 23, 2002 11:11 PM              

um, carlo, tis supposed to go:

For there in the night sky
(are) immortalized,
the noble Archer
and scintillating twin orbs,
perched,
as decreed by the Fates
on the edges
of a celestial arbor.

For here in the soul-expanse
in perfect symmetry
(are) linked,
as arranged by the Fates,
Mind and Spirit
in the depths
of a burnished heart.

they just sound more lyrical without the verbs.

i think herbal potions/healing herbs goes more with 'garden' than 'healing potions'. what do you think?

also, since I didn't make any subjective reference until the last part, can we change "tell me" to "pray tell"? and "this soul-expanse" instead of "the-" so that it refers to a specific physical being?

heh. is my mars in virgo showing?

thanks again!

posted December 24, 2002 04:49 AM              

g'nite!

posted December 24, 2002 09:32 AM              

BTW, Carlo - you were right about "Adaptation"...absolutely flippin' amazing.

posted December 26, 2002 01:45 PM              

You speak:
"I feel, so I see,
but having forgotten,
reached out for a hand -
finding yours."
And I laugh,
not in cruelty, but
in Gratitude and Comfort
and Joy. And so -

posted December 26, 2002 02:33 PM              

I and You Structure
and then Scatter,
Feel and Forgive and
then
tumble into
Analysis and Clarity.

posted December 29, 2002 09:52 PM              

But I LOVE the artwork! Esp. the picture of the woman with the Lion. Ah, how that brings back memories...

posted December 30, 2002 02:07 AM              

"Mars is the ruler of Aries."
"Nothing rules Aries."
"Mars is the ruler of the first house."
"That's better."

lol

okie Corri, I'll be patient Good things take time. What is your major anyway?

posted December 30, 2002 06:50 AM              

That picture was just fitting of that Leo and I. Of course, I'm not exactly built that nicely, but it's my fantasy.