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Author Topic:   Anyway to survive Sun opposing Uranus in a serious relationship?
BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 15, 2006 10:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Is there any way that such an aspect can be overcome in a relationship that is hoped to result in marriage? I read in Linda's book that its an on-off again type of relationship. And its true my bf and I broke up 26 times...in past 6 months! Though we did not fight at all for the first 6 months of the relationship, conflicts seem to come out of nowhere and I have no idea how to stop them. We have a hard Saturn aspect also opposing Sun. But other than that our synastry (especially with the nodes and asteroids) is magical as is our Arabic Parts. And yet i cannot figure out how to stop this hell. And while both our Uranuses r in Sagittarius and both our Suns are in Gemini. My sun is EXACTLY opposing his Uranus while his misses it by maybe like 5-10 degrees so they arent really opposing. Any way to deal? Please help.

------------------
Sun-Gemini
Moon-Scorpio
ASC-Libra

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 15, 2006 10:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Here is Synastry chart

Given that my Amor is conjunct his Sun and my Valentine is conjunct his N.Node. His South node is conj my Asc.

His Amor is conjunct my N.Node

my Lust is conj his Valentine and ASC
his lust conj my neptune

My Arabic part of love ios conjunct his Vertex

My Vertex is conjunct his North Node

My Part of Marriage is conjunct his DC and his is conjunct my DC

His part of Fortune is conj my Mercury and Mars

My Part of Fortune is very conj his Ascendant


Please help guys, im very hopeless at this moment. His Saturn is transiting his DC and its conjunct right now and this relaitonship is going through serious trials and these fights coming out of no where are really scrweing me over good.

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Inner depths
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posted December 16, 2006 01:27 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hmmmmmm......The only way that I can relate to this energy you ask about is that I have this placement natally - sun opposite uranus. My gut feeling tells me that the relationship would need to have less focus on commitment. Relationships scare me to tears because I think that my individuality would be lost, however if I keep things light hearted and casual then being with somebody doesn't bother me because the focus doesn't go on intense and serious feelings etc. I can still live my life and spend time with a special friend. (As long as I get my space to go spend time alone and explore the world.)

The Uranus person is usually the freedom loving one who gets antsy when fenced in a relationship. Just keep it fun and casual and ease off on the seriousness of commitment. Is it usually him that pulls back from the relationship? Maybe he just needs to balance out his life more....

Just a thought.......

ID

Ya know what...come to think of it...I'm in a relationship simular to the one that your in. My friend is a Aries and I have uranus in Libra. Our Suns are Conj and his moon is conj my Uranus. (His Sun opposes my Uranus) In the beginning he seemed to be very desperate to get a girlfriend and wanted to call me every single day - until I reached my limit and told him that I needed some down time to recharge my batteries.

I joke to him how I find marriage and relationships to be like a noose around my neck. I also realize that people need each other and no man is an island. I still seek a friend and companion first...before entering into a commitment. I get antsy when the deep feelings are brought up and I tend to distance myself away from him - eventually I will talk to him about how I'm feeling. Keep the avenue of communication open between you two. light hearted and airy is the way to go.

I find with commitments I do better if there is no expectation of a commitment and that I am free to come and go as I want. I need to ease into things before I am sure and made my mind up to make a lasting commitment.....it doesn't mean that I want to play the field cause that's not it....it just means that I need more down time and want to live my own life through myself instead of living my life through others. I also find that I need lots of variety in my life and get bored seeing and doing the same things day after day.......

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Gemini Nymph
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posted December 16, 2006 01:58 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Saturn and Uranus trump Arbaic parts anyday, regardless to how "magical" you want them to be. Sorry.

Ideally, tough Uranus cross aspects can be dealt with if there's positive Saturn cross aspects. Unfortunately you guys don't have that. You have tough Saturn aspects too. Saturn aspects tend to be karmic and "teach" us a lot. But they can be quite painful wgen they're hard aspects.

You have two aspects that tell me why you guys keep coming back together: his Pluto conjunct your moon and your Ceres conjunct his moon. The Pluto-moon is worrisome -there's a kind of obsessiveness about this relationship, where he (Pluto) has more power over you (moon). You let this relationship and him dominate your life. This wouldn't be so bad if Uranus and Saturn weren't such a problem. When balanced out with positive aspects, a Pluto-moon cross aspect can bring an driving intensity and deepness to a relationship. But here, I fear it just may make it harder for you to face reality and break away from this fruitless cycle you're in.

As for your Ceres conjunct his moon, this means you're willing to love him unconditionally, which is usually a great thing. But the problem I see is that you're too ready to forgive hima nd take him back. This too will only perpetuate teh cycle, and this will be more hurtful for you than him.

Your Neptune wide conjunct his moon probably isn't helping either. Between your moon conjunct his Pluto and your Neptune conjunct his moon, you probably feel this is indeed amagical, once-in-a-lifetime relationship. Unfortuantely Neptune may be obscuring the truth, and both of you are likely to resist facing reality. He (moon) probably likes the dreamy quality of this relationship, it may even be addicting for him. You (Neptune) may feel compell to keep up the illusion out of fear of hurting him and being rejected yourself. However, this pattern of behavior can lead to great heartache when the illusion wear thin and reality shines through.

I think there's some hard truths about this relationship that both of you need to face. I don't think this is the kidn fo relationship you're hoping and fighting for. The sooner you two take a realistic measure of what's going, the better off both ofyou will be, even if it's not what you wish it was.

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Happy Dragon
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posted December 16, 2006 09:33 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
re: the guy ..

mid 2003 till late 2007
t.Uranus is squaring his gemini placements
that comes from t.Uranus in his 1st house squaring his 4th house

t.chiron from his 12th is active by aspect .. to his natal merc and saturn
probably since early 2005

t.Sat on his DC has been noted elsewhere .. that will be ongoing
.. as it goes retro 'n direct ..

t.lillith is active .. having just squared his venus and neptune placements

t.Pluto to conjoin his natal Moon .. building up 'till early 2011

nataly his saturn and mercury are at a very close opposition ..
.. as are his venus and neptune placements ..

and he's just been having a mars opposition to natal merc transit
and a merc transit opposing his natal chiron ..
t.jupiter opposes his sun .. next in line .. it opposes his natal mercury

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 16, 2006 10:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
What does that mean Happy Dragon??

And thank you al for the insights but i was wondering Gemini Nymph are all the good Venus and Mars placements and Moon Venus placements and ASC placements and Node Placements completely canceled out by the Uranus and Saturn. And there is no way to avoid that if i want someone my age because my Sun is opposing my own Uranus and Saturn. So am i doomed? And is there anything at ALL that can save this relationship? It was perfection for about 9 months...just perfection...all of the sudden this crap is out of nowhere.

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InLoveWithLife
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posted December 16, 2006 10:53 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
BUD, just wanted to send u some

i know you are going through a difficult time. And i know what u mean when u say that u have a sun opp uranus. i have a sun sq pluto, as bad if not worse.

But i have a feeling, that this means that once we integrate these aspects into out own personality, they will cease to affect us in a negative way. for example, i know a guy with sun opp neptune, and will u believe it, he shows abs no negative traits of it whtsoever. he is genuinely nice, really reeeally patient with the people he loves, and a very broad minded and spiritual person. And no delusions/holding on to unrealistic expecttions either. heck, he is one of the most grounded persons i have met.

so i have this feeling, that though he will have a sun opp neptune with most ppl of his generation, it is unlikely to carry it over in his relationships. he is totally aware of his blind sopts, and those of other people too!!

So have faith, u r not 'doomed' or anything. And it may not seem like that now, but everything happens for the best. As they say, 'God writes straight with crooked lines'. I wish i cud give you something more concrete to look forward to....but once u begin to think positively, u will find something to look forward to, believe me. please don't think that either you or this relationship is doomed. and u know, we r more than our charts, as Zala says. much, much more.

read some positive material....watch positive uplifting movies. keep yourself occupied. and NOT with bashing your charts to death.

take care dear
ILWL

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InLoveWithLife
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posted December 16, 2006 11:02 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
If you read the lectures by liz greene that HD posted here sometime back,
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/011378.html

she talks about how if we don't accept the uranus in ourselves, it comes disguised in the form of people and external circumstances. but once we 'honor' the uranian energies in ourselves, it won't come back and bite us when we least expect it.

this is what i meant whn i talked about integrating it in yourself/in the relationship. may be u need to approach your relationship in a more unique way. not expect it to be your average gf-bf kind of thing. something like that.

i believe that if we look deep inside ourselves, we will find the solutions to all the problems we r facing. but sometimes we r too scared to look, bcoz we may not want to accept the solution tht our heart offers. but the heart is always right, bcoz it is connected with God/Universal Consciousness, and knows what is best for us. So dear BUD, you yourself hold all the answers to your questions. Don't be afraid. You will be all right. that much is a guarantee from me to you.

take care, and do what your heart tells u to do, bcoz there is no other way to go, believe me.

ILWL

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 16, 2006 11:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Dear ILWL,

Thank you so much! Im so greateful that I have people who wish me well and say such wonderful things. I really feel so hopless but only because despite all my pessimism when it comes to love im religiously optimistic and believe that if you want something so badly you simply cannot fail. And i promise myself I will take a break from astrology because it became such a crutch but then i notice something that can help me and go forward only to find out there are other horrible aspects that make me feel even more hopeless. I embrace the Uranian energies but I dont know how to deal anymore. I really love this boy but Im starting to worry he will fall out of love with me. I tried to talk to him last night (he hates discussing emotions) but I need it so much. And he said he feels like im backing him into the corner and he will talk about feelings when the time is right. But i know him and he never will. So hopless...but thank you so much! Im doing the best i can to overcome this I just feel like im the only one fighting.

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 16, 2006 11:36 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
~ Sometimes the need to destroy is experienced inside oneself. I think that's a progression upward from blaming the other person, but it's much harder to recognise that you are trying to kill something you love. It makes no sense, and goes against any rational reason or moral decency. Whether this leads you in the end to staying or leaving isn't really the point. I think the point is to discover that emotions are often terribly ambivalent and that love is far more complicated than 'Bride Magazine' is prepared to admit. The capacity to betray is one of Pluto's faces, and to find that you yourself are capable of betraying someone you love is pretty difficult if you have any idealism at all in matters of love. To discover that love can die is also an awful face of Pluto, because we want to believe that it's permanent if it's the real thing. Power battles and manipulation and cruelty and sexual control are other Plutonian favourites. Obviously a person with Venus in Aquarius opposite Pluto in Leo, or Venus in Taurus in square to Pluto, is not going to be very happy about all this because the conscious values are so much at odds with Pluto's primordial nature.

God thats so me....Im a Venus in Taurus (IN 8th HOUSE) opposing Pluto in Scorpio in 2nd house...How wonderful is that? Does that mean i can never ever be happy in intimate relationships? Because i hate superficiality and crave intimacy esp cuz my own moon is Conjunct my Pluto. But also my Venus is opposing my bf's Pluto and my moon is conjunct his...in other words its hell for me either way i go about it...I honestly admit i sabotaged my previous relationship. I got bored so i took it appart, poked holes in it, manipulated, controlled and all that lovely stuff...and then was shocked when the person left. Im trying my best to avoid doing this now but i feel its out of my control cuz of Uranus!

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Happy Dragon
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posted December 16, 2006 12:14 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
b.u.d.

re: ** .. What does that mean Happy Dragon?? **

well that's the thirty three million dollar question ..

** So am i doomed? **
.. .. i doon't think so .. ..

personaly i don't think astrology can tell you What Will Be ..
it can only tell you what influences / energies you are and will be subject to ..

how one ( or 'another' ) will deal with those energies ?? ( rehtorical )
well i would think one would have to know the Person fairly well to even guess it ..

i'll try 'n get back to re that first question .. IF i can figure a way to explain it ..
gotta go now ..
folks are knocking on m'front door ..

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 16, 2006 12:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you so much Happy Dragon! As long as im not doomed im sure i can keep going! Though sometimes i feel like im a sucker for punishment. I read that thread on outer planets and i think i defnately have been projecting and sweeping under the rug. Time for some me introspection time for sure! Thank you very much

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 16, 2006 01:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
His North Node is also conj my Vertex. Would that activate it? And wat does that mean? My N.N is conjunct my own DC. I feel like its my karmic duty to suffer in relationships...for the rest of my sad sad life and im only 19. Whohoo

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GeminiLover75
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posted December 17, 2006 12:59 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
BUD... I think the positive advice in this thread is so valuable. And I'm going to take that advice myself.

Like you I've been worrying about how relationships are going to affect me throughout my life... different placements to yours, with me it's Saturn in my 7th house. I've been obsessing over questions like, if I don't attract a Saturnine partner then will it end up that I have to be the 'Saturn' one instead? Will relationships always be hard work for me? Will there always be a boring element to my relationships? And if they are not does that mean that Saturn will ALWAYS, IN SOME WAY, rear it's grumpy head to ruin things? I'm at the point where all I can do now is just be positive and stop allowing Saturn to depress me... and Pluto... and Uranus... and Mars. Not to mention squares... oppositions... T-squares... you name it. F*** them all, I'm getting on with my life, and whatever comes my way I will deal with it.

I am: ( decan), I'm damn proud of it, and that's all I need know! LOVE to all of us.

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 17, 2006 01:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ur a Leo decan? I think im a Libra decan. LOL more Libra in moi.

Definately Gem,
read the thread in Soul Unions it REALLY helped me right now. Im still in the crapper but like 50% less which is a big one.

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GeminiLover75
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posted December 17, 2006 01:30 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yep, the proud Lion. I just read your thread BUD... tears still in my eyes... I somehow feel like everything in that thread applied to me too.

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BornUnderDioscuri
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posted December 17, 2006 02:47 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for BornUnderDioscuri     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I know i was thinking of you when writing it as well. And soooo true it totally made me cry, i didnt want to say cuz i felt ppl would find it cheesy but it was honest tears of relief. Lotus has a gift for sure and i love her so much for her help!

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