posted November 01, 2007 04:29 AM              

I have also experienced an overwhelming amount of loneliness.

posted November 01, 2007 04:43 AM              

what i noticed is that saturn has just finished transiting your jupiter and is just now transiting your mars. i would think that this could make you feel discouraged and maybe feel like you have less energy and/or have a hard time with your sense of purpose.

you have some similar placements to me (i am a year older, but our house placements are similar) and saturn just entered my 8th as well and i can definitely feel something more profound changing in me and it can be very difficult to deal with the darker stuff it brings up. maybe you are experiencing this as well?

please be gentle with yourself and remember that all troubles pass. i hope you get the answers you need.

edit:
also.. just to note. saturn just finished trining my chiron (also in taurus) and i found it to be *tremendously* healing for me. the timing was exact and impeccable. this should happen for you in about a year or less; just something to look forward to . here is the description for it:

posted November 01, 2007 05:13 AM              

I've gotta run but I'll follow this thread when I get back!

posted November 01, 2007 05:22 AM              

quote:

---

Um, I think Chiron might be a planet (or it's considered one), but in this case you're probably looking at your Sun (in 5th house) as the 'cutting planet.'

I've gotta run but I'll follow this thread when I get back!

---

My Sun is in the 5th house.

posted November 01, 2007 05:24 AM              

i know for myself, finding a deep faith really helped me out of it. it can be difficult to find and depression can take you into some hard times, but just remember that every single problem has the solution within it.. go for long walks in nature and *expect* goodness to come into your life!! you deserve it!!!

posted November 01, 2007 05:56 AM              

I'm so glad you're seeing a counselor soon - additionally, look after yourself physically... eat healthy and go for walks... get a cat or a dog... meditate... pray, even if you don't feel like anyone is listening at first... and maybe try some distance reiki... there is a site http://www.reiki-4-all.com where some members send distance healing for free... There are so many great things out there that can help.

posted November 01, 2007 07:36 AM              

LTTs the last time saturn aspected your Sun was may 2001
that was by conjunction

for now
tSaturn is the main fly in the ointment so to speak ..

the t.Lillth transit will pass by begining december ..
t.Chiron is moving .. once again to square natal Chiron ..
( t.Chiron was mentioned when you joined this site LTT
( it since went retrograde and is now direct again
the Chiron transit will be over by begining feb. '08
but will retrograde back to within 1 degree around september

unfortunately tSaturn is something you will have to deal with
untill june '08 ..

posted November 01, 2007 10:27 AM              

aprox from the 28th untill now .. you've has transiting Venus conjoining
your natal Saturn and squaring the other two placements ..
( that transit is now over )

it might be a key to how you feel now and again ..
maybe just watch the faster transits from mars and venus
as and when they aspect those three placements ..
'n see how you feel at the time ..

it's the transits from the faster planets that trigger
feelings from the outer planet transits ..

posted November 01, 2007 10:29 AM              

One thing I noticed right off the bat is that most of your planets fall on the right side of your MC, which means that you are greatly effected by outside events. And, maybe sometimes, you allow these things to overwhelm you. I think this is also due to what I perceive as a very neptunian/saturnine personality. You feel things deeply and they often leave you feeling disillusioned and depressed.

I saw you have a neptunian personality because you have a locomotive pattern in your chart and the "leading" planet is Neptune, in the 12th house...very piscean/neptunian. (I hope I read that going in the right direction.)

Also, your chart ruler is saturn, it's in the 8th house and it's part of a T-square.

So, saying all these things may not help you very much, but let me just say this. I've read that looking at the sign and house opposite the square planet in a t-square can give you some clues to dealing with it. And, low and behold...the sign opposing your saturn is pisces (in the 2nd house). So this is just a suggestion, maybe you should look to exploring matters of spirituality and how they effect your sense of self-worth. With Neptune in the 12th house, maybe this is a part of your life that has laid dormant. I'm not saying you need to enter a monastary or something! But maybe exploring the areas of spirituality in a very compassionate, pisces-like way will help you. Maybe...doing volunteer work, maybe look into nursing...I don't know! I think that maybe helping others might actually make you feel better...helping yourself at the same time. Just a thought!

Of course, this is in addition to whatever medical treatment you feel is appropriate. I would never discount the importance of this.

This is just food for thought so please just take it as that. Good luck and let us know how you're doing! *hugs*

posted November 01, 2007 11:09 AM            

Transiting Pholus is opposite your Sun and square your Mars right now (I know from experience how difficult Pholus transits can be - see my thread on Pholus: http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/015243.html )

Transiting Venus is square your Neptune (from cafeastrology: "Transiting Venus square Neptune:
Unclear desires.
Imagination and fantasy fog judgment and create romantic confusion. Relationship ups and downs characterize this transit--a time when romantic mirages are more than likely. You see what you hope to see, rather than what really is. The "highs" of a relationship begun under this energy may be thrilling, but the accompanying "lows" are bound to set in, and they can be extremely draining. Be careful not to set yourself up for disappointment. The same goes for finances--what appears to be a great buy is likely to turn out to be a financial drain or money pit. Avoid making large purchases and commitments at this time. You may be inclined to withdraw from social activities, perhaps to nurse your wounds. This transit sometimes correlates with feelings of rejection or unusual experiences in love.".

Transiting True Node is square your Sun (almost to the minute).

posted November 01, 2007 12:07 PM            

Me, too.

I would not run from your depression or medicate as modern day society dictates, unless absolutely necessary. I have found taking time to live in, be in the depression, meditating, soul searching does beautiful wonders for this perfectly natural expression of the soul.

Years ago people respected depression and honered times of melancholy. They even built gardens with statues of Saturn where one could go and be alone in their dark nights of the soul.

Be Blessed

posted November 01, 2007 01:12 PM              

I'm not quite sure about the more in-depth aspects of astrology, such as Pholus (the link didn't work) and the implications of having a "T Square", however, it's all extremely interesting.

quote:

---

But maybe exploring the areas of spirituality in a very compassionate, pisces-like way will help you. Maybe...doing volunteer work, maybe look into nursing...I don't know! I think that maybe helping others might actually make you feel better...helping yourself at the same time. Just a thought!

---

Excellent advice.

But my main problem is finding out exactly what.

posted November 01, 2007 06:54 PM              

i have neptune in the 12th too. i think it creates a spiritual thirst that can be very confusing.. maybe because it is unfocused being in its ruling house? that could very easily become dispondency or depression, i imagine (i am not sure as i have not researched this placement).

i love the idea of volunteer work as well! i have a very neptunian chart as well and it is very helpful to put all of our extra energies of compassion into practice in the real world. it helps ground us and gives us purpose instead of that free floating anxiety that is so easy to get lost in. do you like old people? babies? special needs people? or would you prefer doing something more clerical for an organization that appeals to you? i bet if you phone around you can find lots of opportunities for volunteering. people *love* having volunteers around! and i bet if you phone community resources or something like that they can set up an appointment or have someone help you choose something.

also.. about the medicating. i agree to an extent with hippichick (i think?) who cautioned against it and advised spending time in your depression for clues and healing, but i just have to say that i have found with homeopathics and flower remedies that if you choose the right one, it really just helps to loosen the block and give you some perspective on it. it does not numb your mind or cause any jolting whatsoever. it can be difficult in depression because i think the nature of it is related strongly to some sort of blind spot or defense mechanism that has become habit.. so it can be extremely difficult to understand or gain perspective on through simple meditaion (though of course it can be done!). but the homeopathics can really help give you that perspective and help your mind find new paths and all of this is very very gentle. i have lots of experience in this myself. i especially love the flower essences because they start working pretty darn quickly and you can buy them anywhere and they aren't as finnicky to take as homeopathics.

hope you are having a better day today, listens! come back and talk to us if you need to

posted November 01, 2007 07:00 PM              

But first I need to heal myS-elf.
(?)