posted March 27, 2008 12:11 PM            

It seems that I feel every chick ive ever been involved with was "the one." I'm a guy and it is hard for me to deal with the fact that I fall hard for chicks quite quickly.

I have this overwhelming feeling that I need someone more like myself in order to be happy. My need for equality, fairness, and reciprocation in a relationship are really strong and if those requirements are not met, I start to think negatively about the relationship.

I'm not a *** for tat type of person that when I do something for my woman I want her to do something back right away, no, its not like that. I view equality and fairness as something that happens over time. I don't even look for these things but I notice them when they are not present.

Why am I like this? Is there some lesson to be learned from my chart that I don't know about? Also I want to add that Its hard for me to let go. I can deal with being alone but I much prefer not to.

Help me out fellow knowflakes! Please!

Me: 6-15-1978 @11:27am EDT in Atlantic City, Nj. And if you wanna compare charts with my wife, hers is 3-13-1979 @ 12:30pm EDT in Atlantic City, Nj.

I'm posting this from my iphone so I can't post my chart till I get home, however I did post my chart in another thread on the first page of this forum, but I'll post my birth info anyway.

posted March 27, 2008 02:12 PM            

During our breakup, I dated an aqua (2-15-1984 @ 12:05 am est in Newark, nj) that seemed like a good fit but I ended it because she had an issue with being lazy and a liar. I don't call her at all but she still tries to call me to this day.

I treated her really well while we dated. I don't know why I go through this crap.

posted March 27, 2008 03:07 PM              

you said you guys broke up right? i think it's okay to air your frustrations in context.. i don't have time right now to look at your charts, but i did notice that your exwife has the same birthdate as a good friend of mine. also someone posted about a guy born on this day as well, just a few days ago, and was lamenting that relationship too!

posted March 27, 2008 03:11 PM            

You say you would be dustraugt but I think you would be more distraught if you had to go through half the things she has put me through. You'd tell me I should have ran for the hills looooong ago an never looked back. I know there are two sides to a story but I'm posting mine here.

Let me give an example. I don't do the infidelity thing and believe that is a relationship breaker. She belives that if I caught her cheating (which I did), that I should totally forget about it and move on based on her schedule of when I should be over it. And let me tell you, that's just the tip of the iceberg. That is one of the biggest reasons why we split for 7 months and almost got a divorce. I want to make it work for the sake of our children first, and to give her a second chance at our marriage. M just having a hard time forgiving her for cheating and trusting her again.

I'm here telling you this because I see her old ways creeping back up, however, she is trying so I have to give her that. And I say shudders because of her impersonal love style that is caused by her Venus in aqua. We actually had a long discussion about our individual love styles and how we perceived each other this morning.

Sometimes I feel like I was too nice to her and that is why she took advantage. She said my main problem was that I internalized and didn't talk to her about what bothered me. But the thing is, I DID tell her what bothered me, she just didn't listen.

Another big reason we broke up was because she was incredibly selfish. Everything was always about her.

posted March 27, 2008 03:18 PM              

I´m Pisces and when I read your post it´s like it´s my ex (a gemini) who writes all this about little me... *lol*

You are around 10 years younger than him, and he has matured considerably, so I guess there is hope for you too... one day you will wake up and realise that the grass is not greener over there and maybe, just maybe realise it takes two to tango... or as my grandmother said about Geminis; "they never chase the tram they are already sitting in"... (got that?) *lol*

N.B. No offence GotGemini - I enjoy reading your posts (so Gemini-ish! and I don´t mean to be nasty or anything, but your post reminds me of thinking twice before dating a Gemini again *lol*

posted March 27, 2008 03:23 PM              

you want to know why you get in relationships that compromise your sense of and need for fairness?

you want to try to work it out with your wife (i thought you said you broke up but maybe i misread), but aren't sure you can trust her?

posted March 27, 2008 03:50 PM            

I've often wondered if its something in my chart as well.

I hope you and your wife can work it out and communicate. Also, I must say I find water signs plain difficult to communicate with, they just don't 'get' me IYKWIM....... not that that should make any difference. I think they just think differently.

posted March 27, 2008 04:32 PM              

”I seemed to get matched up with some doozies. I couldn't be married to a more incompatible person, a Pisces with a Virgo moon, Aries merc, and aqua Venus (shudders everytime I think about it).”

She didn´t only marry you – YOU married her too right? Did you also Shudder in church when you said yes?

”It seems that I feel every chick ive ever been involved with was "the one." I'm a guy and it is hard for me to deal with the fact that I fall hard for chicks quite quickly.”

So, maybe “being a guy” is the big error in you life… *lol* No astrologer can help you there though… therapy? ;-)

”I have this overwhelming feeling that I need someone more like myself in order to be happy.”

Maybe she does too? (poor girl…?)

My need for equality, fairness, and reciprocation in a relationship are really strong and if those requirements are not met, I start to think negatively about the relationship.

“MY NEED FOR…” yup… you need to rethink about thinking when it comes to relationships ;-) as I said before “it takes 2 to tango”…;-) Maybe have a little look at “why reciprocation of equality and fairness doesn´t happen” between the two of you? Could YOU be one of the two factors here?

”I'm not a *** for tat type of person that when I do something for my woman I want her to do something back right away, no, its not like that. I view equality and fairness as something that happens over time. I don't even look for these things but I notice them when they are not present. “

I´m sure SHE too notice if they are not present … ;-)

“Why am I like this? Is there some lesson to be learned from my chart that I don't know about? Also I want to add that Its hard for me to let go. I can deal with being alone but I much prefer not to. Help me out fellow knowflakes! Please!”

I wish I could, but I see no remedy in sight for this type of ailment… selfishness can only be cured when recognition of illness has been uptained… ok, joke!...*lol*

I hope you sort it out with your wife in the end, but think about it… you do come across as if you don´t realise how selfish your first post sounded.

Dani California has a point with watersigns and communication - we aren´t always being understood, so maybe this is the main problem here?

Good Luck!

posted March 27, 2008 04:48 PM              

but i don't think water signs can be *understood*. it's more about going with the flow, following feelings.. maybe if you tried stepping out of your mind or need to understand her, you can see if you can feel it out with her, from today on, if this is a relationship you both want to salvage. maybe she is thwarting your efforts to communicate if she feels you are being too persistent about it (dunno if you are; just a guess).

posted March 27, 2008 04:56 PM              

then again, the sea reflects the sky and the sky warms the sea.

posted March 27, 2008 05:12 PM            

First, Its not all about me, never has been. I ty to the best of my ability to do the things that mass her happy. That entails a lit but I try to do what I can. I support her, treat her with respect, give her companionship, help cook, clean, worked two jobs for 5 years so we could get her teaching degree, and the list goes on so no, I'm not selfish or whiny. I think I have a legitamate gripe. I treated her like a queen and all I asked was to be treated well. So you are saying these wants are selfish?

Please elaborate if you will, and again, I'm not taking offense. Its just that our convo here is very familiar.

posted March 27, 2008 05:42 PM              

Why don´t we ask her to come on here and write HER version - that´ll be amusing *lol*

I might have felt too much empathy with her (easy to do the way you wrote about her)as she is a pisces and I might feel a bit sorry for her... I just find it difficult to see a Gemini man being dominated and run over by a Pisces girl... but stranger things have happened...

My libra Moon just wants to see both sides of the problem... and when you also mention that the Aqua girl was being Lazy and a liar... hm... I thought, isn´t it very geminish to look for something else/new instead of "dealing with the problem" - we ALL have our faults and we will always find new/other faults with other people no matter what signs we mix with...

I remember being with the gemini-guy, no problem with verbal communication - great! But we didn´t "understand" each other... no matter how many words that we exchanged...

I agree with what has been said before here; go and talk with a councellar... I know cases where it has really worked wonders for couples... I think you both need to get help from outside to sort this out.

posted March 27, 2008 06:06 PM            

Its complicated because she never wanted me to leave but she put me to my breaking point, I couldn't take it any longer. I think the time we spent apart has made her realize the things she has done were wrong. She is getting better in some areas and I'm trying to work on my flaws as well.

posted March 27, 2008 06:10 PM              

If someone has been unfaithful then I don´t see it as an “astrological problem”… the placement or a natal chart doesn´t make a cheater but the action chosen by the individual for whatever reasons – free will for good or bad.

Usually these cases, when one partner has been unfaithful, are too “infected” to sort out by just “moving on and forgetting about it” – when going to a therapist or a councellar the act itself by just going there can make a big difference – by symbolically drawing the line for a new beginning and be proof of both wanting to make it work.

I sincerely hope you and your wife will sort it out Got Gemini.

posted March 27, 2008 07:09 PM            

Anyways, just got out of my session which went well.

posted March 27, 2008 07:25 PM              

like i said, if i was your wife, id be distraught.

posted March 27, 2008 07:31 PM            

Anyways, just got out of my session which went well.

posted March 27, 2008 07:36 PM            

quote:

---

Its complicated because she never wanted me to leave but she put me to my breaking point, I couldn't take it any longer. I think the time we spent apart has made her realize the things she has done were wrong. She is getting better in some areas and I'm trying to work on my flaws as well.

---

posted March 27, 2008 07:46 PM            

I'm not sure but I also though I stated I wouldnt pursue her unless me and my wife split. Were working it out. I haven't seen or spoken to that libra since then.

I guess you could say I'm wrong cause I'm curious and ask about other women, but I don't call anyone or have cybersex if that is what yall are thinking.

posted March 27, 2008 08:09 PM            

While some may say even flirting is cheating, I don't think so in my case because it happened that one time and I wouldnt take it any further, also, I'm a flirt by nature. So please, understand that I have not done anything that would give my wife reason to be distraught. Should I flirt? Probably not, but I don't think I hurt anyone. It sounds like a double standard but it isn't. I playfully flirt with NO sexual overtones. But I know, that still doesnt always make it okay. Hmm... Maybe I'll stop since it is in a way counterproductive.