posted July 15, 2008 03:59 PM         

I
have Venus/Uranus aspect, so does the man I pine for and our relationship was SO Venus:uranus!

posted July 15, 2008 04:49 PM         

Oh gawwwwd - mars/Uranus? I have mars trine Uranus 3'

posted July 15, 2008 05:50 PM         

I have the Venus-Uranus conjunction in Scorpio within the lst house no less and I have found this to be one of the trickiest aspects in my chart.

How does one explain to their significant other one's need for a certain amount of independence/autonomy?

I ask because I have suggested the following to my fiancee and she has gone hysterical at my suggestions (i.e. "You don't love me anymore" even though I do):
1.) Having our own rooms in our 2 bedroom apartment.
2.) Living in different apartments within the same complex.
3.) Buying a duplex, where we each get one half.

posted July 15, 2008 06:13 PM         

I don't think it is because she thinks I am going to cheat on her; she knows that loyalty is one of my biggest virtues.

I think the problem is that she is one of those people who needs constant reassurance in order to feel truly loved (she does have an exact Moon-Neptune conjunction in the 4th house.) If she doesn't get that reassurance, she gets very clingy and tries to create that reassurance artificially.

This entire scenario is replayed in what ever other personality tool one wishes to use (i.e. I'm a 4w5 self-pres. variant, she's a 2w1 sexual variant.)

posted July 15, 2008 06:33 PM         

I have actually had her read the descriptions of Venus-Uranus in several books, with mixed results.

As for diplomacy, I'll give that a try; it would be a good thing for me to cultivate.

posted July 15, 2008 06:47 PM         

Can you not tell her that the reason. You are marrying her is cos she is the most special woman in the world?

I regret my need for reassurance now, ESP as I am naturally so independent. Best of luck!

posted July 15, 2008 09:41 PM         

She is indeed the most special woman in the world to me as she is accepting of nearly all my foibles, is very emotionally supportive to me, and passed the infamous Scorpio testing periods with flying colors.

I have tried saying to her, "I love you, this has nothing to do with you, I am not going anywhere, I want to stay with you, I just need my own space to process my own intense emotions and do my own thing." It truly is a frustrating situation, especially due to my complex chart, but like I said I'm trying to work it because I've destroyed too many relationships in the past.

The way that I look at it, there are five things that make relationships extremely difficult for me:

1.)Uranus is the "bad boy" of my tight Scorpio stellium, which also includes Moon, Mercury, and Venus. Thus, independence is mandatory in many aspects of my life.

2.) Venus is my chart ruler and Aries is my descendant ruler; they are locked in a tense 3 degree square (and Mars squares the rest of the stellium too).

3.) My stellium forms an opposition to my 7th house Chiron.

4.) Pluto is conjunct my ascendant and Sun.

5.) I have 5 planets in the first house.

OY! What a mess!