posted February 18, 2002 10:43 PM         

Although you felt calm as you walked through the house, this calm was born of familiarity, not peace. This is a situation you are familiar with, you have been here before, as is indicated by an old stove and and old fashioned ford truck. These two items point to an old pattern at work. What is cooking in this "new" house (to you) is actually something old.

You wish to move this relationship/situation because you cannot live with it (living room) like/where it is (removed from the center). The old pattern takes over (truck) and begins the move. This truck symbolizes the way in which you handle these types of situations, and it is much outdated.

A friend points out a broken window - there is something about this situation that you have not been seeing, or do not want to see. Upon realizing that there is something wrong, much more damage comes into focus, you become more aware of the extent of your short-sightedness, of your illusion.

In the end you are left with a house on a trailer with a smashed wall/roof. The situation/relationship has no foundation (or at least an uncertain one) and the higher levels of it, the mental or spiritual or ideal, are not.

I did not intend for this to sound so negative or pessimistic, but this is the way it comes together in my mind, so that is the way I must relay it.

Please let me know if it makes any sense, corrections can always be made!

Whoa. Don't know what to say. Now I'm confused. Now you know me I'm going to what I'm going to do but I just don't know what that is. I hate to bother you but what type of tranists do you see. I know charts van bind but I'm so confused. Hmmm am I confused or am I not hearing what I want....hmm

posted February 18, 2002 11:42 PM         

You know. I get so tired sometime Auriel. I hate being alone (you know that already though ). I really don't do single well. It's not like I don't feel like a whole person I just don't like it. After meeting Jose, I just don't get it. He's not perfect but he is perfect husband material. I think about me. All my flirting and all of his little reponses but still nice guy. Not going to end on realtionship just to start another. What woman doesn't want that. It just gets to be hard.

Ra is right though about there being no foundation. By the way thanks for the recommendation. The guy is pretty unbelivable.

posted February 21, 2002 10:45 AM         

You and Jose have a lot of strong aspects, so when he says the foundation isn't there, I see that as you meeting him while he's still attached to his wife. If he were totally free, I really think you'd have the rock, solid foundation you want. However, for whatever reason, you chose to meet up at this time when he wasn't. Possibly for you to help him in some way?? You have told him to get counseling and told him his relationship means more than money. I'd say you've given him A LOT to think about.... There's a lot of healing that needs to be done between you and Jose, and maybe you helping him by being his friend is the way to do that. You could be testing yourselves by adding the sexual chemistry dynamics to your relationship, and could have very well taken that path together. But it seems to me that you didn't go with temptation, but followed your Higher S-ELF with the help and guidance from spiritual sources, and went the path that's best for yOu. That was tough, and I commend you for it.

As for being alone, when you learn to get comfortable with that, then you'll find the right one. Is your email still the same? If not, email me at Auriel@linda-goodman.com I'll send you some stuff I think you will like.

BTW, I totally agree with you about Ra!!

Take care, sweets!