posted February 18, 2005 03:56 PM         

The first one is a friend of hers. She met him 4 years ago and they have got a very deep bond. They talk about absolutely everything. They connected straight away even when they come from very different backgrounds and have opposite views in many things. They share a very special and weird link, some kind of mysterious cord...

However, this man is rather unstable emotionally. Heīs always playing around and is unable to remain faithful to his mate. He is fascinated with sex. Thatīs his external appearance but heīs good-natured and very protective of hers (I remember one occasion when a group of young men were making fun of her and as soon as he found out, he was ready to face them without thinking how many of them there were).

She appears to be the only woman that he respects. Heīs always saying how important she is for him, how much he loves her and his only real friend.

Until the begining of last year, everything was normal... Their friendship always had been a bit flirty but still because he is a bit roguish... but she didnīt take it seriously because thatīs part of his character. But then, one day, when he was driving her home as normal, he started to kiss her and tried to go further

She always had been attracted to him but at that point in time, especially because she knew every little detail of his relationships, she didnīt consider him as a factible option and stopped him. She didnīt want to risk their friendship because she knew this man would lose the respect he had for her if he got his objective. She doesnīt really know if his interest is genuine or it is just another challenge.

After being rejected, he just left all this episode as a game, as if he was trying to test her... But reality was very different. The following month, he was avoiding her constantly. He acted as if he was hurt but never mentioning that day. Only a few months later, he started to behave normally.

Two weeks ago, he started to play hard again...

Now we have the second one... She doesnīt consider him a friend, not like the other one. Itīs just a exciting acquaintance They clicked instantly... She met him through other friends and started seeing him only occasionally. However, they have started to go out as friends without the people who introduced them. She likes him more and more every time.

They share many common interests: traveling, cinema, theatre, music... Their worlds are more alike.

What is the problem then? We donīt really know what he is playing at... He rings her suddenly, very interested in seeing her or talking to her one day... And the next, he plays evasive and unconcerned. He tells her he is interested in another girl who is not interested in him but insisting that he has overcome all that already... He constantly loses opportunities to be with her and plays cold about it but then he acts as if he regreted it... He is driving her (us) mad!!! He is getting playful as well...

Now, the big dilemma... She is attracted to both of them. The first one is his friend and she doesnīt want to lose him under no circumstance but she canīt help to feel an irresitible pull towards him. On the other hand, she doesnīt have a friendhip to lose with the second one and she likes him a lot...

If things go on like this, she will have to make a decision, and at the moment, she canīt make any...

posted February 19, 2005 04:12 PM         

It depends on what she's looking for. If she's looking at all. Like Pixie says, don't commit to anything and have fun. The bantering can be stimulating, but we don't know what her true wants are. If she is looking for the "real deal," then I would suggest that she keep dating other people besides the Scorpios and focus her energies on what she really wants, and give less time and emotional investment in casual play.

posted February 19, 2005 06:44 PM         

Natasha

posted February 21, 2005 02:08 PM         

I really like your sensitive side

posted February 21, 2005 04:36 PM         

Full speed, no brakes... They are clearly messing her around. His friend should value their friendship more and stop playing dangerous games because it seems to me that both of them are going to get hurt. You donīt play with people you love... Sex is not that important, especially when he gets it with any other girl he fancies...

As for the second one, well, I donīt like him one bit... He is not clean... He doesnīt care at all for her feelings, he is just playing.

At least the first one truly cares for her. He needs to get more centered, thatīs all. Sex is not a game and when you mix it with friendship and a confused mind, itīs very dangerous.

But I wanted (and she wanted me) to share it with you... I know she knows she should be running by now... She should have started a while ago, but she is hypnotised... I know how it feels, they are like a drug (Sorry Pixie, no offense to you... Iīm sure there must be a higher kind of Scorps... It happens that I never met one yet...).

posted February 21, 2005 04:50 PM         

As a friend you have done the best you can by being sincere and giving her your honest opinion. The next part of friendship is acknowledging her as a grown person and letting her know you will be there for her for the ups and the downs. Sometimes in friendship, friends will do and say things that go against better judgement. True buds let each other stand as people and grow their own.

Best of luck to your friend and whatever she decides to do.

posted February 21, 2005 07:11 PM         

I cringe when she tells me some of her stories, I bite my tongue to not say “I told you!!! What did you expect?”. But maybe Iīm wrong, maybe she needs to go through all this herself... I canīt live her life, she has her lessons to learn... I just canīt help feeling impotent because I know what is coming and Iīm not able to do anything... Maybe Iīm wrong, maybe she will be all right, maybe she wonīt be broken, maybe they wonīt sting her to death like my Scorps did to me... Maybe that game wonīt hurt her as much as it did to me...

Natasha, I agree with you... This is all about power... They play to dominate each other... She goes after that exciting almost-impossible conquest, blind after the challenge... And they go after her as if she was a wild animal they want to tame, control, seduce and bend.

posted February 22, 2005 11:59 AM         

Hope this helps

posted February 23, 2005 02:05 AM         

Looks like everyone's here has already had some good advice... just adding my 2 cents to this: I think if your friend were to talk it out with the 1st Scorpio.. ask him what's really on his mind, if he's just playing or what, it'll make it much easier for her to decide how to respond to him. Though, the avoidance tells me that he probably likes her a lot & wants more than just friendship! It's nice that they already have a bond; that, to me, is always a plus in a relationship (though i never did form a deep bond with either Scorpio i've been involved with; they were both very playful!). It's strange that you mentioned he's not faithful - strange because Scorpios are known for their loyalty - perhaps he's got some affliction in his chart?

Now, what's up with the second guy? It sounds like mind games - i've seen those before. Did she reject his advances? If so, i'd say he's trying to make her regret it by talking about other women, so she will respond favorably the next time, or maybe just plain jealous, so she holds on to him tighter (by committing to him).

One more thing i'd suggest to her is to decide what she wants in a relationship right now; that'll go a long way in helping her decide who to be with. You're a good friend, steelrose, for trying to watch out for her! I wish i had one of those right now - mine kinda flaked on me when i didn't make the decisions she wanted me to make
Oh well....