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Author Topic:   The problem with knowing you guys is...............
sue g
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From: former land of the leprechaun
Registered: Sep 2004

posted June 06, 2005 07:32 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sue g     Edit/Delete Message
...........meeting other less evolved souls (and that is not mean to sound judgemental, remember I am a Scorp and see things all too clearly at times) is very challenging for me. Hubbie and I were in the pub last night, it was a great session, lots of people singing and generally being merry. The Pisces woman friend of my husband was there, I didnt see her for few months, so it was a bit of a challenge for me. The first thing she did was moved the stool away from me to sit next to another. Oh guys, after speaking to you lovelies over the past few months, I found it so hard being with this woman and her friend. They were talking about nail varnish and beauty and stuff and asked me about my nails - ha ha, short and non painted and I just thought "oh my, we are in for a good night". Anyway the conversation did evolve into higher things, we spoke of parenthood and how difficult it was with our son, and Pisces woman said "well is it your fault then, or his?" I was flabbergasted and replied "well there is actually more to it than that, we have gone in deeper with him (rmeaning the past lives), but I am not gonna go there here cos I dont think its the right place and you probably wouldnt understand". She just looked at me blankly and then said I spent too much time with him and I should work and leave him to get on with it - HE IS SIX!!! She could see I was sensitive about this issue, but no support came, and this is a woman who wants to be my friend. My husband said I read too much into it - I felt unsupported - I felt as though I was surrounded by aliens, have gotten so used to having you beautiful people and two or three friends here that I can reach great heights with, it felt like s*** and I felt angered by them - why??? Well because my hubbie is her friend, he even said she isnt a very understanding person, and I said she was an air head cos all they had in common was cars. I am sorry guys to go on, but I feel safe here, and after last night, I feel like I have slipped back a bit. I felt impatient with her lack of intelligence, but more so her lack of sensitivity. This is a woman that cried on my shoulder when her hubbie left her and I heard the same old story time after time "he dont want me" and I was there, but she made me feel as though no other had problems. She said we should be grateful for our health and life (which I agreed with) but OMG isnt there more than that - depression, desparation, isolation, we as human beings are not strangers to these curses. If she wasnt my hubbies friend, I wouldnt give her another thought. He seemed to think I was being too extreme (who me - ha ha), This has hooked me in. I know Mama Mia called her a FREAK in the thread I put up called understand a pisces woman. It just seemed to me that something that is so blatantly obvious to me, eludes her and that is sensitivity to others feelings. Sorry to have rambled - love to all xx

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Mama Mia
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posted June 06, 2005 10:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mama Mia     Edit/Delete Message
I donot know Sue g she does not sound like the typical Pisces women. I am a Pisces we are so caring most of us, I am concerned about strangers and I feel so many ppl's pain and I cry for them. You can do one of two things to her Straighten her @$$ out 1 good time tell her exactly how you feel about cetain things skip the fact that she is your husband's friend let him know that you feel she disrespects you in a sneaky way like you ar slow or something. It is a women thing and maybe he would not understand. So you just had to check her and u would not be mad at him if the tables were turned and he had to dothe same to a male friend of yours. Or you can just cut her @ss off I mean totally ignore her like you never knew her,either way she would get the point. If it were me I would more then likely check her @$$, but that is me. Hope you work it out...

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trillian
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posted June 06, 2005 01:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for trillian     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Sue G

As co-creator of your Universe, why do you think you manifested the Pisces into your life? You have the answer somewhere inside.

And remember, 'evolution' is in the eye of the beholder. Saints and sinners are one in the same.

That being said, she does sound terribly insensitive...but I also have to say that I have found that trait in more than a few Pisces. Any idea where her moon is?

And you know, despite my interest in metaphysics, I like talking about hair and nails and clothes and make-up and all that stuff, too. Sometimes my head is in the clouds, but I live here on earth.

Hope you're feeling better.

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fayte.m
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posted June 06, 2005 02:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for fayte.m     Edit/Delete Message
~Edited~
from sue g:
quote:
Its so good to see other sides, and no one need apologise for what they believe in - I love the honety here tis very refreshing. I hope at this stage I am big and strong enough not to take offence at what I am meant to hear.

I hope so too.
quote from sue g:
quote:
Fayte, I just knew you would understand, maybe it is very indicative of the Scorpio woman, these challenges we are presented with. I was told by many seers and prophets that there would always be much jealousy around me - I think the same is with you (normally from women too). This is hard for me. I dont seem to have problems with men!!!!

You and I most definitely do not view men and silly needy women exactly the same way.
Women will not feel threatened by you talking to their men unless you come on as a vamp or sex fiend. So no sue, women are generally not threatened by me when it comes to men. And I do not believe in jealousy either. I always let the other person go if they need/want to, and walk away. If they want to go...who am I to be so needy and foolish as to want to keep them?????
If you cannot trust someone why on earth would you want to be with them?
If you trust them then jealousy should never enter into the picture unless you really do not trust them or have low self worth.
And to act all jealous when your mate has not done anything is saying to him loud and clear; I do NOT trust YOU!
So no...in retrospect I can see we are not of like minds when it comes to this matter.
quotes from you:
quote:
do you think me mean and paranoid

Paranoid? yes. But "you already knew the answer within yourself" when you asked another here that question. You have said here and elsewhere that even your husband thinks you are paranoid.
These quotes by you below, tell me your husband is not wanting to run around. Hows about really trusting the dear fellow huh??????
You can drive a man away who is innocent by acting as if he is guilty or think he could be. Why should he bother being faithful? He is already under your suspicious jealous eye and damned if he does, and damned if he does not.
He might as well run around.
He is faithful. but you do not trust him, and constantly need him to prove he is true to you.
If I were him, I would start wondering if you were thinking of being unfaithful, because of your projecting such suspicions upon him. I see alot of contradictions here too.
Either trust him or not.
I ask, why are You threatened by Her? I do Not see a threat based on your husband's reaction to your jealousy.
Quotes from you:
quote:
My husband said I read too much into it - I felt unsupported

If she wasnt my hubbies friend, I wouldnt give her another thought. He seemed to think I was being too extreme (who me - ha ha),

I am just wondering if any of you ladies out there could be all love and light and stuff to her if you felt your man was attracted to her........

But would you be as able to let this go (and I think you are right guys there is a bit of a power struggle going on here). I dont mind admitting that my Scorpio sting is being shown the light of day.

she isnt really a close friend, more of my mans.

I find it very tiresome and it has caused friction between hubbie and I

As for my hubbie, he knows exactly what I feel,
he thinks I am extreme (he is not wrong there),
but at the same time he assures me of his love and loyalty to our marriage, and yeah I do believe him.

I know my man loves me and feel he wouldnt cheat, he is lovely

he assures me of his love and loyalty to our marriage, and yeah I do believe him.


You are not sounding like a woman who trusts her husband.
Or is self secure of your own worth to self and to your husband.

quote:
I think she is dangerous and keeps saying "oh I dont want another man" - I feel she protests too loudly.

If you honestly trusted him,
that silly needy woman (far from dangerous! She sounds pitiful by what you describe and lonely) should be absolutely no threat at all!

quote:
My intuition tells me she is bitter and jealous of my situation.

Very likely. But not just you, but any woman. Also how long have your husband and her been friends? If the friendship is an old one...back off! It will not become anything else unless you push him away with your not trusting him and jealous displays. If it is not old, still nothing to worry about. He seems to think her rather daft too.
Also You have male friends and flirt rather outrageously...as you yourself have many times called your devilment!. Well many other women will not see that as cute, but man chasing! Please take a hard honest look at yourself dear. You may well appear to other women, who feel threatened by you, in the same way this woman friend of your husband appears to you.
quote:
Yes I have been put in a position with a friend of mine who my husband cant stand - a female, but even so he really cannot tolerate her - I understand, even at times I get irritated by her. I know I can be a person of double standards, this is something I dont like about myself and am trying hard to heal

Yes...double standards. You have friends, male and female, you have no right to dictate to him who he can be friends with. Marriage and true love is not about ownership. If it is, it is a lousily excuse for a marriage and a juvenile form of possessive love with little to no trust.
quote:
this is something I dont like about myself and am trying hard to heal

I hope in time you can. Not only with this situation but with friends and sharing them freely. All of them, not most. Most is not all. I feel you see rivalry and competition often where there really is none. It is all in how "you" perceive things.
quote:
I am gonna ask God for more tolerance f*** knows I need it.

Indeed, we all do, Keep working on that.
quote:
she and my hubbie have more in common (fast cars).

So what? Why should that bother you? Do your male friends like all the "same things" your husband does? Of course not! You are not into the car scene. What is so bad about him having a friend who is into cars? Male or female?
But I see you are also unnerved by the attention your husband gets from men too.
quote:
The other one is a guy, who keeps kissing him and telling him he loves him, usually whilst stoned or drunk - YUK!!

Stop freaking! Trust your husband, or not. But I suspect he feels the same about the guy and the woman. Just buddies, nothing more!
Also was this woman tipsy or sloshed? Were you? You did not give up the booze until much later, as you said yourself.
quote:
The Pisces woman friend of my husband was there, I didnt see her for few months, so it was a bit of a challenge for me.

You let it be one. It should not have been a challenge. If she is that much of a twit, as you have said, I do not see why you are concerned that she is your husband's buddie. Maybe he just likes the contrast.
quote:
Well because my hubbie is her friend, he even said she isnt a very understanding person, and I said she was an air head cos all they had in common was cars.

He is not interested in her! Can't you see that? Not as an intimate!
quote:
she did the fluttering eyelashes and pouting thing for my husband to rescue her - he was annoyed and told her so.

Sounds like he knows her well! But he married you. Looks like she is only a buddie to him is all. And he does not want her for anything else I believe.
I'd trust him. Why can't you really trust him?
This silly woman is no threat as far as I can determine.
Remember, my ex#2 has exactly the SAME birthday, only minutes apart from your husband's, even the same year! He never cheated on me. He only had an irritating(to me) "love affair" with fast cars!
quote:
I am beginning to think I dont know who I am, that I am not as evolved as I would like to be. This issue is affecting me more than it ought.

Yes it has. You really need to just let it go. Let it be. I see no threat here. As for the nails, laugh at her! Say, "oh honey, I can do more things with my soft fingertips than your talons ever could to satisfy a man!"
quote:
I know I have great work to do here -you pushed my buttons (especially Taurus), it doesnt feel very comfortable, but I think I need to be honest with myself.

I certainly hope you really meant that.
I should have been more to the point before, but I did not have the entire picture, until I reviewed later, many other posts about this woman and how much you feel danger from her, and threatened/challenged by her.
quote:
always feel safe with Scorp women, kindred spirits xxx

I wish that were true.
Good luck.

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sue g
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From: former land of the leprechaun
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posted June 06, 2005 02:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for sue g     Edit/Delete Message
Thanks guys, really helpful as usual, The problem is I have been spoiled by a couple of amazing friends here, who are astrologers, mediums/healers, musicians. I am perhaps being too hard on her with the nail thing, but Trill you would have to see it to believe it, even my hubbie thought it was "twee". It happens every time they are out, "lets look at your nails then". Anyway I know what you say is true, theres a reason for all of this, I think for the moment, I am gonna let sleeping dogs lie. I dont feel the urge to rush in like I used to., will just pray around it. She has Moon in Taurus like me (LOL), I am gonna ask God for more tolerance f*** knows I need it. Thanks again guys, appreciate your help xxx

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Devilfish
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posted June 06, 2005 08:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Devilfish     Edit/Delete Message
i would love to have a Guiness at a pub with you Sue !
An unsympathtic pisces sounds off balance
maybe she's really unsmypathtic/judgemental to herself
the way we love ourselves reflects on how we love others
you seem to be a very loving insightful person so you are respectful to yourself as well as others
but
some people are damaged
and they try to damage others ,as well, just to save face to themselves.
this woman needs some healing
but
im not suggesting you heal her only she can do that/ hope its before she loses such good friend.
jmho

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 08:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Maybe she doesnt need healing. Maybe she is a great person, you two just rub each other the wrong way. Maybe your Moon's square each other's. Maybe it stems from a past life. Maybe you have something to learn from her and she you. That is why you have come into each other's lives.

I bet there are people who think she is very sympathetic and others who dont.

Who is anyone to judge?
She could be saying the same things about you.

Is it true?

In who's eyes?

Some people you just dont mesh with. Learn what they are there to teach you and move on, wishing them well. Everyone is a reflection of a part of ourSelves and we invite them into our lives to learn from them. Whether we consciously ask them to or not.

Best of luck in your dealings with her Sue.

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 08:23 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Break the karmic cycle and attachment by releasing the negative feelings you have surrounding her.

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Devilfish
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posted June 06, 2005 09:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Devilfish     Edit/Delete Message
taurus thats very true advice

i only talked of healing in reference to her husband deal, i just thought she might be feelin raw and defensive.

"Some people you just dont mesh with. Learn what they are there to teach you and move on, wishing them well. Everyone is a reflection of a part of ourSelves and we invite them into our lives to learn from them. Whether we consciously ask them to or not."

well said.

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 09:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
*devilfish, just saw your post now. going to read it

sueg,

You mentioned that meeting unevolved souls is a challenge for you. "You are a Scorp and see things all too clearly."

I think that an evolved soul wouldnt find it so challenging. I'm not saying that you are not evolved, I'm sure you are, it's just that no one can be the judge of how evolved someone else is or not. You are only seeing them through your own filtered vision. We all *think* we are seeing things clearly, but, are we really? I'm just as perceptive as any Scorp. I'm sure there are people out there that judge me as not so evolved. Then I've had numerous people say the opposite. I try not to get wrapped up in that and just live life the best I know how. No one is right or wrong. I know who I am and I realize that just because I have a conflict with someone else, that doesnt necessarily mean that they are unevolved, need healing or pity. Maybe we have unfinished karmic business. Maybe they are more 'evolved' on other levels than I am. No one is better than the next guy. We really are one and mirroring things back to each other. All connecting and meeting for lessons we need to learn. Things we need to wake up to.

Please dont take this the wrong way. Youve just gotten me thinking and I hope it somehow helps you.

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 09:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Devilfish,

Thank you. And sorry, I didnt even remember who said that about the healing. Just started typing away.

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Devilfish
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posted June 06, 2005 09:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Devilfish     Edit/Delete Message
awwwwwww dont be sorry , you have a valid point.

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GemStar
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posted June 06, 2005 09:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GemStar     Edit/Delete Message
The last three posts were right on Friends!!

Need to let go of those negative feelings and manifestation of unnessary stress...

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GemStar
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posted June 06, 2005 09:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GemStar     Edit/Delete Message
Devil...my count was messed up!! You squeezed one more post in...ha,ha!!

Oh, and, uh...'scuse the spelling error...wish I would read through these before I hit the send button!!

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 09:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
You had a few valid points yourself Devilfish ~ "the way we love ourselves reflects on how we love others"

GemStar, Indeed. Words to live by.

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 09:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Trillian said it nicely:

"As co-creator of your Universe, why do you think you manifested the Pisces into your life? You have the answer somewhere inside."

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Devilfish
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posted June 06, 2005 09:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Devilfish     Edit/Delete Message

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 09:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Hey devilfish. Nice hair.

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geminstone
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posted June 06, 2005 09:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for geminstone     Edit/Delete Message
I'm with 26.... and, not without acknowlegement to how you feel, Sue' cause, it would be safe to say that, everyone has felt the same, at least a time or two.... but, what it amounts to is time and energy that just continues to feed into what really does'nt matter. When it comes to your baby, you KNOW so, don't give her that much sway there. He is your Son and, ONLY he can pass that kind of ' judgement ', because only he knows you as 'Mother'. I, too, believe that there will always be encounters with personality clashes,.... I, also, believe these are the lessons in patience, tolerance, acceptence and, compassion.... none of which I can claim to have mastered! Sue, I think that you should not remember what you have given only to not see it returned and, be strong instead because YOU did give your support, period. I would be willing to bet that, one day, she will be reminded by being thrown into the same emotional state that you find you are in now. In all that we tend to tie up in our interactions with others, the importance of what being human is, is what goes forgotten...

~ geminstone

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26taurus
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posted June 06, 2005 09:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Well said Geminstone. I dont want to sound like I think I have them mastered either.
Part of being human I guess. hehe.

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sue g
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posted June 07, 2005 06:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sue g     Edit/Delete Message
"I think that an evolved soul wouldnt find it so challenging". "Im not saying that youre not evolved".......

mmmm........I was interested to read this Taurus cos, I think I needed to hear it (although to me the two sentences seem to contradict each other). Anyway, I feel I may have good insight, intuition and even a certain amount of wisdom,but I hear what you say, and I am beginning to think I dont know who I am, that I am not as evolved as I would like to be. This issue is affecting me more than it ought. I am just wondering if any of you ladies out there could be all love and light and stuff to her if you felt your man was attracted to her........now dont get me wrong he is not with her or anything, we talk a lot openly and I feel I know the score. But would you be as able to let this go (and I think you are right guys there is a bit of a power struggle going on here). I dont mind admitting that my Scorpio sting is being shown the light of day. This is a woman that came out with us one night. My husband had never seen me sing before and the very night they came to listen, she sat and chatted to him all the way thro the song, Later she was being chatted up by a guy and did the fluttering eyelashes and pouting thing for my husband to rescue her - he was annoyed and told her so. I watched her in the pub with the blokes and like Viper said once little bo peep - lost little girl - I think she is dangerous and keeps saying "oh I dont want another man" - I feel she protests too loudly. She once said to me "oh well you have been with him 15 years and then went on to say that I had better be careful etc (ironically her marriage broke up after 15 years). Having said all that I know you guys are right, but also would be interested to see how you would feel in the same boat?? My intuition tells me she is bitter and jealous of my situation.

This is a hard one for me, I have shed tears over it. My shaman healer said "when are you gonna cry for yourself and not others for a change". Well Pina, if you are listening girl, I have been doing that. Yes I have been put in a position with a friend of mine who my husband cant stand - a female, but even so he really cannot tolerate her - I understand, even at times I get irritated by her. I know I can be a person of double standards, this is something I dont like about myself and am trying hard to heal.

I know I have great work to do here -you pushed my buttons (especially Taurus), it doesnt feel very comfortable, but I think I need to be honest with myself. Having said all that, I have no intention of being her friend, Ive now reached a stage in my life where I choose very carefully, and even tho I have great love for my hubbie, I draw the line there, it just doesnt "feel" right.

Fayte, I just knew you would understand, maybe it is very indicative of the Scorpio woman, these challenges we are presented with. I was told by many seers and prophets that there would always be much jealousy around me - I think the same is with you (normally from women too). This is hard for me. I dont seem to have problems with men!!!!

Anyway guys I am gonna close, said a lot and dont wanna bore you all - thanks for your help and guidance - love to all

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pixelpixie
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posted June 07, 2005 06:57 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for pixelpixie     Edit/Delete Message
This is the woman you dreamt of, isn't it?

Listen to your intuition.
Sure, the evolution of a soul is in the moments of challenge... but if you are sensing something you think is inappropriate, listen to it.

Put it in perspective and see her as someone you are helping right now... try to see her as she is, not as you project on to her... *this is easier said than done, especially in light of those 'territorial' feelings*
Go out with her, help her find her legs. But that doesn't mean she can imply things that make you uncomfortable.
You can even be honest with her there ( though I know you will play these cards close to your chest, as you are definately not used to threats to your love from an outside source regarding him)

Maybe she is more flippant when you go out simply because of the atmosphere.. a pub, and she doesn't want to dwell on anything deeper than nails.
Doesn't mean you have to.. it is her night, as it is your night.
No judgement here.

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sue g
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posted June 07, 2005 07:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sue g     Edit/Delete Message
I was calling for you Pixie............and you heard, thanks for your help, valuable, very valuable xx

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26taurus
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posted June 07, 2005 08:36 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
If put in the same boat, she wouldnt be someone my husband and I hung around with. I would listen to my intution, which I never said dont do. I also never said I think you should be friends with her. From the sounds of it, I think you should stay away. I just dont think that thinking negatively towards and judging her will get you anywhere. Lose this woman. Plain and simple. Your husband should understand why. And even if he doesnt, he should respect the fact that you have very strong feelings around this and sense things going on beneath the surface and it makes you uncomfortable. You are his wife. You are number one. She is trying to come between you, so she needs to go bye-bye.

Dwelling on what kind of person you see her as and that she might be after your husband, is not going to do any good. They are only hurting you more. Our thoughts are alive and find a way to manifest themselves. The more you think about her stealing your husband, the more power you are giving for that to actually manifest. You can choose not to associate with her. And if I were you, I wouldnt.

And you wouldnt imagine the jealously I've encountered from other women. I get along better with men myself for that reason. Theyre not as petty, catty. I can relate to you there.

I'm not saying be all love and light to her. But by holding onto negative feelings surrounding the situation, you are keeping the chain connected and open. I mean wish her well on her way (in your own mind if you can) but say farewell and dont look back! She needs to be cut out of your lives, that is what your intuituion is trying to tell you. Hopefully, your hubby can understand and maybe see where you are coming from at least a little bit.

And sorry, I pushed your buttons. People do that to me here all the time.
This time, for some reason, I said what was on my mind, and I guess there was a reason for that. Usually I just keep quiet, because I know people arent going to want to hear what I have to say. Their egos get involved and they think I'm the bad guy attacking them, or I dont 'understand', when that is not the case.

Again, I dont think you have to be friends with her. And dont bother trying anymore, she obviously isnt looking for a frienship from you. I think you need to break away from her and not let this negative cycle continue. It will snowball if you dont. I've seen it all before. (and when booze is involved it makes everything ten times worse.)

Just my two cents. Best of luck.

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26taurus
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posted June 07, 2005 09:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 26taurus     Edit/Delete Message
Is this the same woman that FishKitten pulled some cards for you about in another forum? I believe her words were to 'watch out' and 'be very careful' (I would pay attention to anything FK says. Dont take it lightly) Youve been warned, so why still associate with her? Your intuitition is screaming at you about this one. Listen to it.

.....Actually, dont just listen to it. Do something about it.

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