Author
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Topic: Houston We have a ...something
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leo_on_fire Knowflake Posts: 330 From: Heiskell, TN 37754 Registered: Dec 2004
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posted May 20, 2006 03:14 AM
Soo basically it goes like this...I still love my ex very much always will..just how it goes..but now I'm seeing this other man (the sag who smiles like the sun) and I think that my feelings are developing into more than just "like"...I actually MISSED him..and I don't want to but I did and do and now I don't know what to do because this wasn't supposed to get serious or have any complicated little emotional thingies..it was supposed to be just fun..someone to hang out with and talk to and make out with and the such...*sigh* now I find myself feeling weird when he's not around...after the last relationship I was in went downhill I'd rather avoid getting that emotional again but the sag makes it difficult... He keeps saying things that any normal woman would swoon over but I keep telling him he shouldn't make promises he can't keep (mistake I know because being a sag he BELIEVES what he says) He thinks I'm pretty and he tells everyone how good a person he thinks I am and he goes on and on about how much he likes me and compliments me every five seconds..which is good for my ego bad for my heart.. But on the opposite hand it's easy to get us off in a disagreement because I handle stress a little differently than he does... It affects my entire mood and the way I am and everything while he just throws it off and doesn't worry about it... It's not that that characteristic bothers me so much as makes me wish I could do the same thing and because of that I get huffy which in turn starts him off on the "Why Katie needs to chill the hell out" lecture... Which then ends with me telling him he can either take me the way I am or find someone else... Then he feels bad and I feel bad and we make up and he hugs me (which I love cos hugs are few and far between these days) and says he doesn't want to hurt me but I'm so stubborn sometimes and I apologize to him and tell him he's gotta great smile... Then when we sleep if I so much as even move in the bed he panics thinking I'm getting out of bed...he'll sit up straight and pull me back and tell me not to leave (sadly enough I think it's because he has night mares which leaves him sweating and fighting in his sleep..he doesn't realize he does this or if he does he doesn't talk about it) Things with him are confusing because they are so simple...everything just flows well... even our arguments which aren't actually arguments but a competition to see who can get the last word in which would be unhealthy in other relationships but in ours... makes for great make-up smooches He's the exact opposite of me but I understand him ...which is odd He understands me and thinks I could conquer the world if I just put in a little effort... which is refreshing... I think he's got so much more than he gives himself credit for and he insists I'm wrong but smiles that smile anyway... All in all the whole thing confuses me... I want to latch on to him and not let go and then when I acknowledge that little feeling I want to run as far away as I can... When we first started dating I was honestly looking for reasons to say no but now I don't want to say no... If I could just relax it would probably be alot better but I can't seem to not worry that what he says is just a means to an end... He tells me I can't be so uptight...that annoys me but I know he's right...I wouldn't walk around with this grey cloud over my head if I'd just chill out.. But I'm watching my back on this one..there's no way I want to end up in the mess I was in... Just someone tell me it's ok to more than like him..that would be helpful
------------------ Live your life without regret, don't be someone they forget. Your heart is not yours to keep, it's yours to give... Unknown IP: Logged |
maroon_flower Knowflake Posts: 205 From: S.E.A. Registered: Dec 2004
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posted May 20, 2006 11:04 AM
Awesome quote, great advise "Live your life without regret, don't be someone they forget. Your heart is not yours to keep, it's yours to give...Unknown" Just cherish the lovely happy moments.. let it all slowly unfold.. all in good time. Be happy !! And savour the times you spend with ur optimistic, cheerful, 'great smile' guy !! Love and be loved ! Houston out.
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Azalaksh Knowflake Posts: 3170 From: New Brighton, MN, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted May 20, 2006 11:22 AM
l_o_fWhen you’ve experienced a heartbreak/breakup, it’s OK to be a bit wary in a new relationship. But one needs to temper the fear of being hurt again and take that risk, in order to explore the joy and exhilaration of a new deep connection. Once-bitten-twice-shy is learned behavior – a protective reaction to prevent further pain – useful behavior that helped our ancestors survive. One learns how not to touch that hot stove again, but to use the heat (which CAN burn) safely, and make a wonderful meal!! It sounds to me like you’re in love, girl And it sounds like Mr Sag might be pretty smitten too. Why not swallow your trepidation and see where this leads?? May be the love of your life, maybe not. But you gotta walk the road before you can find out where it takes you….. one small step….one giant leap Happy Trails! Zala Libra Sun/Leo Asc/Pisces Moon IP: Logged |
MysticMelody Knowflake Posts: 924 From: Registered: Dec 2005
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posted May 20, 2006 02:08 PM
"I want to latch on to him and not let go and then when I acknowledge that little feeling I want to run as far away as I can..." ~LeoI hate disagreeing with Zala I think you should at least give that intuition a listen. There is nothing wrong with taking a rest between relationships. Giving a broken heart to young, clumsy Saggitarian male is not wise. Step back, wait until you are strong and be friends. I know you won't listen. But you asked.... Enjoy the ride. IP: Logged |
Azalaksh Knowflake Posts: 3170 From: New Brighton, MN, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted May 20, 2006 03:24 PM
Zala loves having discussions with her favorite people when they disagree with her!! I'd like to understand your perceptions, MM..... What vibe did you get off the young clumsy Sag?? And Leo didn't say how long it had been since she broke up..... As for still feeling love for her ex, unless it's been a really acrimonious split, I can understand that. They're gone but they still can claim a piece of one's heart -- for instance, a guy I loved who left me almost 25 years ago: I still harbor very fond feelings and memories..... Perhaps she is ready for a "more than just fun" relationship..... the Universe tends to bring us what we need when we're least expecting it..... Whaddaya think?? Z IP: Logged |
leo_on_fire Knowflake Posts: 330 From: Heiskell, TN 37754 Registered: Dec 2004
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posted May 20, 2006 06:03 PM
Ok to answer the unspoken question... it was a very painful split about a year ago...nothing overtly deceptive or hurtful but the end result was the same------------------ Live your life without regret, don't be someone they forget. Your heart is not yours to keep, it's yours to give... Unknown IP: Logged |
boo Knowflake Posts: 64 From: Registered: Dec 2005
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posted May 20, 2006 06:55 PM
Just go for it.I really dont see the point in holding yourself back...standing in the stands, instead of being on the pitch. Whats the worst that can happen? You get together, fall in love, split up, and go back to being on your own again. So why not have a little adventure?! I always think people make such a big deal about love and loving. I know love is all we need but c'mon!! All this time you are spending pondering is just time you could be spending together. Just get on with it girl.
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MysticMelody Knowflake Posts: 924 From: Registered: Dec 2005
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posted May 20, 2006 07:23 PM
Hi Zala Lots of emotional words up there without any practical considerations mentioned. Sag's are famous for a "casual attitude toward faithfulness," I think that is close to a direct quote from Linda, and this girl has a broken heart. Fire signs come fast and hard and hot and the romance is intense, but so are the painful burns when the fire continues on... as it must... An older fire sign who understands their own nature is a different story, but this is a young girl thinking he might be "the one," not an older/wiser lady thinking he might be fun to adventure with for a while.... I know we should Love, but we have to go in with our eyes open and listen to our intuition. The post emoticon is "scary" and she speaks of her misgivings... but then asks for someone to just tell her it will be ok. When you are walking toward a dark alley and feeling fear, it doesn't always mean that you should just go ahead in and trust the Universe to protect you. Many times that fear IS the Universe TRYING to protect you. People should listen more. What do you think, Zala?
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Azalaksh Knowflake Posts: 3170 From: New Brighton, MN, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted May 20, 2006 08:02 PM
phoooey, double post IP: Logged |
Azalaksh Knowflake Posts: 3170 From: New Brighton, MN, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted May 20, 2006 08:03 PM
Hi MM ~I love your solid Cappy wisdom tempered by the Libran love of balance (emotional vs practical) !!! But that quote about Sagittarian “faithfulness” – you know very well that if you wave a generalization in front of a Libran, you’re going to have a debate We’ll revisit that another time I guess what I would like to know is whether l_o_f is looking on this relationship as marriage-material, or just enjoying a wonderful, fun connection. My perception was that l_o_f is just talking about being lovers – special friends – not about setting up housekeeping together. But I wondered about your fearful dark alley metaphor….. MY radar went off about the nightmares Mr Sag has. None of us are perfect, and all of us have history and baggage – I guess it comes down to what one is emotionally/mentally/spiritually capable of tolerating and/or embracing in another?? And can we live our lives being too fearful to take a risk on loving others?? “Better to have loved and lost...” comes to mind….. and Nothing and No One is Forever….. l_o_f, do you want to put up your birthdays/times/places so we can see what the synastry potential is?? MM, your advice about going into this with eyes open is sound, and I think l_o_f is doing a good job of examining and evaluating their mutual behavior. There doesn’t seem to be any of those lovely rose-colored spectacles (that I’m so fond of ) in evidence….. And l_o_f, this is a healthy and sensible way to be: ”But I'm watching my back on this one..there's no way I want to end up in the mess I was in..." And I don’t think you will – because you appear to have learned from the burned hand and hot stove….. Keep us posted ~ Zala IP: Logged |
MysticMelody Knowflake Posts: 924 From: Registered: Dec 2005
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posted May 20, 2006 10:53 PM
I hear ya, Zala Pray, Ms Leo on Fire and then go with your higher intuition. Good luck! IP: Logged |
leo_on_fire Knowflake Posts: 330 From: Heiskell, TN 37754 Registered: Dec 2004
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posted May 22, 2006 03:52 PM
i'm not sure how it would work considering I don't have the time of birth or the place of birth for him...i'll find out and let you know asap------------------ Live your life without regret, don't be someone they forget. Your heart is not yours to keep, it's yours to give... Unknown IP: Logged |
leo_on_fire Knowflake Posts: 330 From: Heiskell, TN 37754 Registered: Dec 2004
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posted October 29, 2006 02:46 PM
UPDATE::::: Mr. Sag turned into a nightmare of the scariest kind. The kind I had no control over and the kind I'd rather never experience again.------------------ Live your life without regret, don't be someone they forget. Your heart is not yours to keep, it's yours to give... Unknown IP: Logged |
Azalaksh Knowflake Posts: 3170 From: New Brighton, MN, USA Registered: Nov 2004
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posted October 29, 2006 04:05 PM
Sorry to hear that it didn't work out, l_o_f -- are you OK??IP: Logged |
BlueTopaz124 Knowflake Posts: 1041 From: Portland, OR Registered: Jan 2004
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posted October 29, 2006 07:31 PM
I hope you are okay.IP: Logged |
Gooberzlostlovefound Knowflake Posts: 1045 From: and the embers never fade in your city by the lake Registered: Jan 2002
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posted October 30, 2006 03:08 PM
Just read this today.Sorry l_o_f IP: Logged |
leo_on_fire Knowflake Posts: 330 From: Heiskell, TN 37754 Registered: Dec 2004
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posted November 01, 2006 12:52 PM
What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger------------------ Live your life without regret, don't be someone they forget. Your heart is not yours to keep, it's yours to give... Unknown IP: Logged |