posted May 16, 2007 10:18 AM         

Thank you...I appreciate your encouraging words.

Dulce Luna

Thanks for bumping

Nelly, Dew

I also appreciate your feedback and insight. All of you, all you folks have helped me a lot on learning more about people born under the influences of the sign Cancer. And I have to admit that, it was truly YOU who had inspired me to write that poem, after not having written anything new for a long time. Without you guys, this poem never would have been written. I owe you a depth of gratitude. Inspiration is so precious and infrequent for someone who likes to write things sometimes (I dare not call myself "an aspiring poet").

But this shouldn't turn into all about me. I am grateful for your replies, for sharing with me, and anyway, just a big, big thank you.

Just hold on to hope, right? But...I fear this lunar Cancerian I intend to reconcile with imminently will not let go of our past easily at all. It's not her fault. Not at all. We were being tricked by my mother. Thinking back, it was pure evil on my mother's part. She deliberately caused miscommunication and misunderstanding between me (Sun Aqua/Moon Virgo/Virgo rising/Saturn Virgo) and the lunar Cancerian (Sun Aqua/Moon Cancer/Taurus rising/Saturn Leo). Terrible things happened between us, both of us said and did terrible things to each other; I won't give up any hope, because I MUST restore this relationship. But I'm really not that 100% optimistic, and it happens to be tomorrow that I had originally intended to visit her. However, having read some of your later posts about holding grudges and acknowledgement of considering not holding back forgiveness to be what, at least, some of you guys may prefer...now I feel intimidated by the possible poor outcome, and I am reconsidering again, wondering if I should postpone the visit. Or if the visit mustn't wait. It's not her problem. It's not Cancerians' problems. No. Who would easily forget about a past injury and just get over it as if nothing happened and everything's still the same? It would make perfect sense that she will not want to start over at all. But this is going to be very, very challenging to me.

Anyway, many thanks again, for your kindness and your encouragement. Words cannot express my gratitude.

posted May 16, 2007 11:26 AM         

Wishing you a lot of luck!!! I know it is hard, but sometimes we have to face this issues before we can go on.

posted May 16, 2007 12:08 PM         

i am not really sure why i am saying all these because I don't know the situation but i don't need to;the truth is always the best way out even if it hurts at first.

JMO.... I should probably just shut up

posted May 17, 2007 07:51 AM         

Many thanks.

I saw the Moon Cancerian today.

No, don't worry, I will never try to fool her and make the most fatal mistake of letting her see right through me- I've never even tried that, because I have never been inclined to do so since we met. She and I had always shared some kind of mutual telepathic understanding. It's unusually easy for us both to instinctively know what is on each other's mind.

And I visited her today. It must have been my guardian angels watching over me- I could tell that she instinctively knew my intent and motive were benevolent. We did not need to say too much to know how to go along with our conversation. And yet, some things are meant to be left unsaid. And there are times when it is the things that are not said that really matters.

So far so good. Thank heavens.

So, indeed, hope is a good thing. Maybe the best of things- as the line goes in the film "The Shawshank Redemption".

I'd like to thank you, my Cancerian companions, for inspiring me, teaching me precious things and helping me out. My gratitude is beyond words.

Thanks.

And all the love, light and blessings to you.

posted May 17, 2007 05:32 PM         

I have my moon in cancer, and this is so true for me!!! I still my friends from kindergarden! ...

To me it doesn't matter just how long it was since a friendship was lost, or why it happend, I still love that person. I can forgive someone for hurting me, but it's hard and it comes with a price. Once someone as abused my trust a coupple of times I won't disappear, but I'll never trust that person in the same way ever again. I'll always be on my guard because I know they've hurt me before, so they might do it again. I don't trust everybody, so to me it is a BIG DEAL. And it never truly goes away. I'll be suspicious forever.

posted May 18, 2007 04:13 AM         

quote:

---

Once someone as abused my trust a coupple of times I won't disappear, but I'll never trust that person in the same way ever again. I'll always be on my guard because I know they've hurt me before, so they might do it again. I don't trust everybody, so to me it is a BIG DEAL. And it never truly goes away. I'll be suspicious forever.

---

Your comment just hits home. That is the true spirit of Cancerians (Moon, Sun or otherwise strongly influenced/represented).

In fact, that would be the perfect summary for my visit to the lunar Cancerian yesterday.

This might sound so drastic and way too dramatic to you folks, but I've just had a reading this afternoon, and although not directly from the answers provided from the reading, but I began to notice that something was wrong in our conversation yesterday.

I used to tell her straightforwardly that I didn't like her attempts to manipulate me when we interacted, and I didn't like her to play dumb. Once I even just said to her "Don't try to fool me. Don't play stupid with me. Because that's just going to be...just hollow. So hollow."

I've got my Mars conjt Asc, so often times I'm too blunt, too naive, and too imprudent.

I noticed each time, she would not stop her manipulating tricks, but instead, each time, she "advanced", so to speak- her "techniques" of manipulating. I remember I used to say to someone else, a mutual acquaintance, that "She (the Moon Cancerian) is the most gifted person I have ever met. But meanwhile, she is the most wasted- she wastes her gift. And that's such a shame."

And yes, this sounds too dramatic to myself, too. But, regretfully, I will have to be the one who makes the decision to end the friendship and leaves for good- because she will not want to let go of the hurt, and she simply cannot, and does not want to, resist the temptation to manipulate and to avenge.

Nonetheless, this does not eliminate my hope on things and people in general whatsoever. I do not despair. I will not allow myself to project my experience with this relationship onto my perception of other Cancerians. I will not hold stereotypical views on everybody else, simply because of her, simply because of one stale relationship. No way.

I will always hold on to hope, and remember each lesson I have learned.

posted May 19, 2007 11:20 PM         

Thanks to all of you, my Cancerian companions here- for reminding me of the power of hope.

posted June 15, 2007 11:35 PM         

Having said all that, trust does factor into the equation for me. If I feel I cannot trust someone with my soft, vulnerable bits then I must change the nature of my involvement with the individual who I no longer trust.

And at the end of a relationship, I have a hard time remaining friends...at least at first. Of the times I have truly fallen in love with a man, the letting go process is indescribably hard for me. I am currently in day 2 of just such a thing...having let go of the man with whom I have been more in love than anyone else in my life.

He wants to still talk and see me and to remain friends but I just can't. I have to go away for as long as it takes to heal and then I will be able to see him. As for going back to someone I once loved...it's never happened once I have truly let go and moved on, but that doesn't mean that I wouldn't. If you asked me right now I'd have a hard time saying that I would never open myself up again to this one specific person.

So that's my story.