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Author
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Topic: I thought Geminis were meant to be dispassionate and detached?
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geminilibrarising
Knowflake Posts: 9
From: London, UK
Registered: Sep 2007
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posted September 09, 2007 11:59 AM
 
I met a sun sign Aquarius a few months ago and felt weak in the knees when he first smiled at me. The attraction must have been mutual because he went to crazy lengths to track me down and finally secured a date with me almost 3 months after first laying eyes on me.So far it's only been a handful of dates. He's affectionate, kind, gentle, hilariously funny, endlessly interested in me and remembers the tiniest details of my life. The 'problem' is that I am head over heels in love with him. I'm a 30+ year old woman and I have never felt this way about a man before. I am soooooo afraid of getting hurt. Also, as a Gemini I've always been fiercely independent and self contained. Now suddenly I've turned into a sentimental fool. I am day dreaming about having this man's children. Could I perhaps be having a nervous breakdown? The way I'm feeling seems so against my nature. My Sun, Moon, Mercury and Venus are in Gemini. I have Libra Rising. My Mars is in Aquarius. The thing with him is he is so loving and sweet when we are together but his emails and text messages are sooooo dispassionate and cold. He also seems unable to handle it when talking about his emotions (not necessarily emotions for me but for anyone). He doesn't seem very in touch with his feelings. IP: Logged |
Node
Knowflake Posts: 688
From: Crowded House
Registered: Nov 2005
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posted September 09, 2007 12:20 PM
Hi- you have tons of air in your chart. If anyone [and we don't know his placements] is able to respect another's need [Aqua Sun] for Independence and individuation it should be you. You have expressed your own need for independence as a separate identity, and that you have fallen so hard @ over 30 yrs of age scares you he might be just as frightened. As far as chilly text- ing. Aqua's seem to have a natural affinity for technology. They are also aware that line of communication can possibly be viewed by others, and not private. Depend on your instincts in private conversation. IP: Logged |
geminilibrarising
Knowflake Posts: 9
From: London, UK
Registered: Sep 2007
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posted September 09, 2007 01:22 PM
Hey Node,
Yes I do have an extraordinary amount of air in my chart. He did tell me his date of birth but I have forgotten it. I am just very used to having the upper hand in a relationship and if I am perfectly honest I've often played games with men and manipulated them. By nature I'm bursting with ideas and very good at communicating verbally but I'm not very physical. Yet with this Aquarian guy I literally feel like fainting from just one touch, lol. When he smiles at me....DAMN! And there's a huge amount of PDA (public displays of affection) between us which is VERY uncharacteristic of me and would seem to be so for an Aquarian as well. We actually got told to leave a bar recently for making out to heavily in there. Hilarious. At the end of our first date, we stood outside my home kissing and before we knew it TWO HOURS had slipped by. I am really not sure what to make of all this. And the problem is that I am very very big on communicating. I am itching to at least give him a hint re how I feel about him. But he is nowhere near as into communicating as I am. He can't even deal with answering a simple question like 'what's your relationship with your siblings like?' He has to turn his back to me literally when talking about emotional things and he speaks really slowly and unsurely. My gut feeling/intuition says that this guy is as crazy about me as I am about him. But he also seems very uncomfortable with talking about anything emotional. Yet the way he looks at me and touches me is a WHOLE other story - it's telling me that he's feeling deep connection or even love. I'm just rather afraid of making a total fool of myself! IP: Logged |
annaf
Knowflake Posts: 108
From:
Registered: Oct 2006
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posted September 09, 2007 03:44 PM
Hi Geminilibrarising,if you remember his birthday, I would be very interested what his other placements are! In any case his cool txting/emailing-style sounds very much like an aquarian I know who has a lot of gemini/capricorn in his chart. But maybe the detached communication style is really just typcial aqua behaviour, not sure. But if you two are already so close, I'm sure the communication is just lagging behind a little bit. Is he your age or younger? IP: Logged |
geminilibrarising
Knowflake Posts: 9
From: London, UK
Registered: Sep 2007
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posted September 09, 2007 04:06 PM
Hey Annaf - he's a year younger than me. So definitely in my same age group.Anyone know anything about Libra Rising? I'm Libra rising and i wonder what that means when it comes to lurrrve 
Cheers
Gem IP: Logged |
annaf
Knowflake Posts: 108
From:
Registered: Oct 2006
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posted September 09, 2007 05:02 PM
a friend of mine is librarising and she also has an exceptional amount of air in her chart (aqua, gemini, libra). Interestingly, when she fell in love with the love of her life she reacted similarly as you....in previous relationships some of her ex-boyfriends had complained about her being too detached and independent, one had even ended up calling her 'the ice queen' because she always seemed so cool and in control....but when she fell in love with 'the one', initially the depth of her feelings seemed to completely overwhelm her, she seemed completely obsessed with him - emotionally as well as physically. She even said that it scared her, because she felt so out of control. Somehow it was actually wonderful to watch because it just proved - air sign, earth sign or whatever, if it's the real thing, everyone will react completely irrationally and with the gut. So why dont you go with the flow? I dont know what he did to track you down, but from what you said, everything points to him really liking you!! Do you have the same circle of friends or do you work together, so that you are in touch anyway, independent of your dates? Otherwise, yes, I can understand how difficult it must be to go from the intensity and closeness of the dates to cool txt messaging.One question - as I said I have the same 'problem' reg. the txting/emailing tone of an aqua. And even on the phone, I found him extremely cool and detached, which I tend to react to quite badly (taking it as a lack of interest). Is your aqua only that detached with txt-messages and emails, or do you also have trouble with communicating on the phone? IP: Logged |
geminilibrarising
Knowflake Posts: 9
From: London, UK
Registered: Sep 2007
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posted September 10, 2007 06:07 AM
"One question - as I said I have the same 'problem' reg. the txting/emailing tone of an aqua. And even on the phone, I found him extremely cool and detached, which I tend to react to quite badly (taking it as a lack of interest). Is your aqua only that detached with txt-messages and emails, or do you also have trouble with communicating on the phone?"Hi. On the phone it's better because I can of course hear his tone of voice. He gets really sweetly shy when he tries to talk about his feelings and there are silences and then there will be a little nervous laughter. I actually love talking to him on the phone. But every time I get a text from him or an email I'm like 'Oh, he's so cold. I guess he doesn't feel much for me, after all.' Part of the problem is that I'm so big on communication and I'm good at expressing myself with the written word and I tend to forget that not everyone is that way. IP: Logged |
annaf
Knowflake Posts: 108
From:
Registered: Oct 2006
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posted September 10, 2007 08:32 AM
do you think there is any chance to double check his birthday? Dying to know his other placements.IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 1496
From: The Ether
Registered: Jan 2006
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posted September 10, 2007 03:37 PM
gemilibra~~~Welcome to the wonderful world of the Aqua male!!! I was about to hang my hat and resign as a philosopher of these creatures, but will stick around for just a bit longer... A Pisces sun I am, highly Aquarian myself so I tend to attract Aquas constantly. Cold....yup, that is them! When you combine the already inability to multitask of the male mind and color it with the Aqua sun, what you percieve is cold, icy cold, not just a cool breeze! And the coldness is almost vacant feeling, quite like air... When you are in his personal space, when he is in your energy space, he atleast "feels" your presence. Not that he will not drift off and take a mental trip to ride with Captian Kirk, he will, but when there is physical distance between his mind wanders. He thinks of so many things at the same time, if he is not engaged in your personal energy space he just can not focus and the icy chill of the Aqua male ensues. I have an Aqua friend that I have called, Ice Man, Mr. Blizzard and he is highly Piscean...still he wanders with his thoughts. Having said that, Aqua men are big into cyber communications so as they do not have to "emote" so. They like, and I will be frank, cyber sex...re-lating electoncially to them is more comfortable than in person, but being men, in person, lust has it's place too! They will run and hide when they begin to feel something for a woman, because feeling is alien to them...tho I am pretty sure all Aquas are aliens anyway!!!  I would have to say, get used to the icy chill..it will always be part of your Aqua guy's persoanlity. I am pretty sure, tho, you can warm the icy chill a bit using strategic cyber techniques!!! Feel as if I am rambling, been out all day and will settle a bit and ponder some more. There are lots of threads about those infuriating, beautiful men on this forum...
Will scout out one or two for you in a bit. O, and be-ware, with your Mars in Aqua, you will always be attracted to Aquas...I speak from experiece.... Terri IP: Logged |
geminilibrarising
Knowflake Posts: 9
From: London, UK
Registered: Sep 2007
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posted September 10, 2007 04:47 PM
Thanks Terri!!I'm not sure I'll be able to deal with the coldness! My last boyfriend was an Aries and I liked that he was quite aggressive in his pursuit of me and very very red-blooded. He definitely didn't blow hot and cold. I've dated other air signs. I dated a Gemini who I thought was weird, twisted and insane. I also dated a Libra who seemed too clingy and pathetic. Never dated an Aquarian before now. I sent my Aqua a sexy but light-hearted email earlier today. Who knows whether I'll even hear back from him! When we text/email, his messages will be curt and cold most of the time but occasionally quite affectionate. Weird. Weird. If I'm in love with someone (and I may well be with him) then I want someone who is able to reciprocate those feelings all or at least MOST of the time. I'm not interested in games and blowing hot and cold. Life's probably too short for this crap, right? IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 1496
From: The Ether
Registered: Jan 2006
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posted September 10, 2007 07:04 PM
Right!!!I am gald you mentioned games....Aquas are really into games...head/mental games, of course. A very wise woman once told me that her ex Aqua hubby once told her he had a death wish on her, to push her, emotionally to the edge, just to see how much she could take...wise words indeed!! From my experience Aquas can not reciprocate feelings of love, openly. They feel and they feel quite deeply, but they just can not show it... They are always, forever off in their world of mind. If a lady can enter the mind of the Aqua with him, wonderous things can happen...while he is riding in a space car with Luke Skywalker, planning a stop at the next planet to enjoy an electric blue beverage, he will engage you in the most marvelous conversation, but Luke will come first...because Luke represents his mind. If you ever do get one to tell you "I love you" remember the magical moment because it will be a rare day that it will ever happen twice. It is like they expect us to live off of the very cold air they send our way...they do not realize we can not, we as women need warmth, touch, connection. They do not realize we are more than a group of atoms of nitrogen, oxygen, argon and the various other chemicals we breathe in the air....They do not realize we can not live off of such, either..
They lie too, as naturally as they live and breathe, and from what I have observed, they do not think they are doing anything wrong.
I have often pondered the symbolism of The Waterbearer...if they do, in fact, pour the water of life upon humanity, then surely water must be highly air, but with only one part oxygen....hmmmmmm
Still I love those airy men....
Silly me!!! I would venture to say with your Aqua guy you are likely in for an emotional rollercoaster ride, tho your Gem soul may be able to handle it...the only way I ever have been able to is because I am an Aquarian-colored Pisces~~~ Blessings Terri IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 1496
From: The Ether
Registered: Jan 2006
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posted September 10, 2007 08:48 PM
What I said here is pretty much the origin of the detachment, I think...so, so mental.... http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum10/HTML/002884.html IP: Logged |
babeefoxx
Knowflake Posts: 305
From: San Jose,CA USA
Registered: Mar 2007
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posted September 10, 2007 11:22 PM
From one Libra rising to another
we're in love with love.Once we find that hero of our dreams(or someone like that) we stay stuck on day dreaming and romanticism...
Plus we can be stingy with our guy/girl!
That's ours!
<3 IP: Logged |
geminilibrarising
Knowflake Posts: 9
From: London, UK
Registered: Sep 2007
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posted September 12, 2007 05:57 AM
Babeefox - yes I'm noticing that I'm a very romantic creature. Just took a certain guy to bring it out.As for Mr Aquarius = he is doing my head in! I sent him a flirty, sweet, light-hearted email two days ago. No frickin response. But when I am in his company, the way he looks at me and the little smiles he constantly gives me and the hand-holding and affection - seems to say it all. If it wasn't for the looks he gives me, I'd have given up. But the look in his eyes.... I can't even describe it. IP: Logged |
hippichick
Knowflake Posts: 1496
From: The Ether
Registered: Jan 2006
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posted September 12, 2007 07:06 AM
Hey GemiAnother "trick" with Aqua men is to out- Aquarian them.... Once he feels you drifting away from his energy space he will be back, quite hastily!!! I do, at this point, have to say something positive about Aqua males...they are capable of the most unconditional love there is...unattached, not codependent, it is just that most of us humans need a more emotional type of connection rather than this "advanced" type of love... <sigh>........ Terri IP: Logged | |
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