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Author Topic:   I give up on love...
JustAmanda
Knowflake

Posts: 567
From:
Registered: Jan 2003

posted May 07, 2008 01:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for JustAmanda     Edit/Delete Message
I cannot seem to have a healthy relationship with anyone...I think I must have something in my natal chart that says "You are Doomed in Love Sagittarius"....I have never felt more alone, more lonely, and more unloved in my life than what I do right now...

Is there such a thing as happiness in relationships? Love in relationships?

Does love even exist anymore? Furthermore...do I even exist? There are times that I feel like I've died but I'm trapped in this lingoworld, where nothing ever goes right and I just seem to repeat the same crap just on a different day...

Why are Sagittarians so hard to love? Is there just something wrong with ME or is it my sign all together?

I'm really, really crushed at the moment..thanks for letting me vent a bit...

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winky_winky
Knowflake

Posts: 296
From: SPAIN
Registered: Oct 2007

posted May 07, 2008 01:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for winky_winky     Edit/Delete Message
justamanda why dont u post ur chart to have us look at it and give u some clues?

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darkdreamer
Knowflake

Posts: 1314
From: Germany
Registered: Aug 2006

posted May 07, 2008 02:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for darkdreamer     Edit/Delete Message
Hi Justamanda,

I`m also a sagittarius and I feel like this, too. At least in terms of romantic relationships. Like I am doomed and have been most of my life.

Must be some Sagittarius-thing, somehow.

DD

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clockworkrose
Knowflake

Posts: 51
From: Pa, USA
Registered: Jul 2004

posted May 07, 2008 02:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for clockworkrose     Edit/Delete Message
I agree. I think it would be best to post your birth information. It has more to do with than just your Sun sign!

If you are still young, often you have to get through your 'humps' and sh*tty relationships... they are your learning experiences. (believe me I know lol) My lesson is to learn the difference between love, lust/infatuation, and co-dependence. They are all different things. But honestly, IMO its better to be alone than to be in an unproductive, unhealthy relationship! Don't give up! You'll find someone someday!

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GemGemGem
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Posts: 149
From:
Registered: Dec 2007

posted May 07, 2008 04:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GemGemGem     Edit/Delete Message
I can definitely relate and know what it's like to feel doomed in relationships. I've been through many failed relationships and a failed marriage all before the age of 29.

I think the kind of relationships we get ourselves into, reflect the energy we put out. If we are not whole, or fulfilled on the inside, we will attract the same type of individual. And two people who are not whole on the inside can never have a healthy fulfilling relationship.

Me, I kept blaming the other person for reasons why things didn't work out. I did this for many years, until one day I realized that i have to work on myself and have a healthy relationship with myself before I can have one with someone else.
I needed to learn to be by myself and with myself and happy first.

Look inward...there is no other person out there that can complete you. Completion of the soul, I think, comes with meditation and learning to be "still" and "present" in your life.

To answer your question, I do believe there is happiness in relationships. But anytime your happiness involves another person, it will be fleeting, because nothing external is ever permanent. Relationship happiness is not permanent. Only happiness within yourself is permanent.

Not to be Oprah or anything, but that book she recommended by Eckhart Tolle, called a New Earth, really made me see things in a different light, about happiness and the perception of happiness...and good and bad events in our lives.

If you are looking for any summer reading, i would highly reccommend it.

Good luck, and don't lose hope.

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Charlotte
Knowflake

Posts: 1362
From: USA
Registered: Apr 2004

posted May 07, 2008 04:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Charlotte     Edit/Delete Message
Well said Clockworkrose...

I have a Sagittarius moon and have experienced that same, Is it me? thing.

Sag's are usually easy to love, and I'll bet You are too JustAmanda! Easy to love and hard to hold...
But, we want something profound in a relationship, at-least that has been my experience. *REAL* love and sometimes that is hard to come by. The Archer aims High and I'm not sure will accept anything less, not truly in their heart of hearts.

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bunnies
Knowflake

Posts: 147
From: U.K
Registered: Mar 2007

posted May 07, 2008 06:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for bunnies     Edit/Delete Message
Gem....you are so right and wise in what you say. And it's only through experience you can feel that way.
It's very easy to mouth the platitudes and say "I'm about finding myself right now and learning to be happy in my own skin" when inwardly all the time you are screaming
"I WANT A MAN!!!!!

But you have to believe me one day it happens. And not in a sad cynical I hate men type of way, but in a calm relaxed manner.
Here's the bad bit.

I don't think it happens when you're young.
I actually don't believe it's possible.
Because underneath,when you are young is that drive to love, to mate and to procreate until you just can't anymore.

So my bit of advice for what it's worth?
Get out there and don't take it too seriously.
You will get hurt...loads of times...but you will live.
It never hurts quite as bad the next time because you remember that bad as it was last time...you lived!
You will always look back 5 or 10 yrs down the line and think "What the hell was I thinking?
Just remember to watch for the, what I call red flags.
When you know something doesn't feel right from the word go.
If you can, get out of those ones fast.
Boy do we override our inner voices sometimes, even when they are screaming "NO! and you are saying

"I can't help myself...it's too beautiful...

Always always always, hold yourself in high regard and have good intentions because if you do, no matter what people do to you, you will feel strong and worthy.
And I think this is the most important thing.
If people don't enhance your life and make you feel happy because they are in it then quite frankly you don't need them.

And now I have completely forgotten whar I was replying to....oh yes...the search for love.
Sometimes it's better to journey than arrive!!

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JustAmanda
Knowflake

Posts: 567
From:
Registered: Jan 2003

posted May 07, 2008 11:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for JustAmanda     Edit/Delete Message
My birth info is as follows...

December 16, 1970
1:55pm
Roanoke Virginia USA

thanks everyone...I'm just sitting here listening to that great song by Pete Townsend, Let My Love Open The Door, and crying my eyes out...

ugh.

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lechien
Knowflake

Posts: 170
From: Germany
Registered: Apr 2008

posted May 07, 2008 11:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lechien     Edit/Delete Message
oh NO! it's a sagi thing? i'm really the same sagi here, and although i'm too optimistic to actually give up on love altogether, i feel like i'm taking a break right now. "taking a break" doesn't mean i'm not looking, but i used to just fall head over heels once i liked someone. i've become slow and skeptical. and i constantly question myself, is this love or is this just obsession/fascination?

i think true pure love exists. but it's dangerous if it doesn't work. it can take your soul out, and i'm curious but at the same time scared. i've never experienced myself but i know a person who had the extreme crash of intense love, and in a couple of years all his hair turned gray and he aged like 10 years. very scary... but it's also romantic.

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lechien
Knowflake

Posts: 170
From: Germany
Registered: Apr 2008

posted May 07, 2008 11:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lechien     Edit/Delete Message
aw i really like that song too!

JustAmanda, let us keep our fingers crossed that we'll someday find true love...

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charmainec
Knowflake

Posts: 43
From: cape town south africa
Registered: Dec 2007

posted May 08, 2008 02:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for charmainec     Edit/Delete Message
Helo JustAmanda

It is important to know yourself first and take time to reflect on how you respond in relationships and what kind of men you're attracting.

We go through theses phases as a learning ground and to gain more experience. I'm a saggi too and went through many broken relationships. After taking a break and contemplating on all my past romances and reflecting on what went wrong I had to admit my part as well as it is easier to blame the other party.After realizing my flaws I could move forward and know how to deal with certain situations in a better manner. I finally found love and we have been together for 10 years now (aries).

Don't give up! Finding the ideal partner is like finding your teacher when you're ready.If you send out positive energy you will attract it too


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bunnies
Knowflake

Posts: 147
From: U.K
Registered: Mar 2007

posted May 08, 2008 02:58 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for bunnies     Edit/Delete Message
A month or two ago I started a thread about how I had never come across a Saggittarian and I found that odd.
Now they're all over the show!
I am having a cosmic shower of Saggies!!!

It's like that old adage about buses.
You wait for ever then three come along at once!!

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bunnies
Knowflake

Posts: 147
From: U.K
Registered: Mar 2007

posted May 08, 2008 03:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for bunnies     Edit/Delete Message
Hey Just Amanda.
As I was typing,a song that I have not heard before came on the radio.

Deltra Goodrem "Believe again"
I dedicate this song to you sweetie.
Listen to the words and be happy xx

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deuxantares
Knowflake

Posts: 216
From: Female, Dubai
Registered: Nov 2006

posted May 08, 2008 03:13 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for deuxantares     Edit/Delete Message
don't !!!!!!

i have not had much luck in the area of relationships either. i was a late bloomer and had my first relationship at 25 years old.

i have the dreaded disease called paralysis of overanalysis, which makes it difficult for me to enter into relationships. plus i tend to attract unavailable men. but now i know better.

i am grateful to all the men in my past. though we shared beautiful times, i would not go back to them even if given the chance. i don't blame them for anything; i feel that each one of them served a purpose in my life.

i remember a quote from an I Ching book, it goes something like this: do not anchor your happiness on your relationships because if you do, as your relationships rise and fall, your happiness will rise and fall, too.

(btw, i'm not a Sag. only mercury in sag.)

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