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Author
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Topic: "I Love You" vs "I'm IN LOVE with you"
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thedividedsky
Knowflake Posts: 351
From: utah
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted July 01, 2008 11:19 PM
 
I always thought they were one in the same.I've recently been schooled. Before I get into my situation I'd like to get your opinion on the subject. IP: Logged |
cancersun_librarising
Knowflake Posts: 2
From: Australia
Registered: Apr 2008
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posted July 02, 2008 01:00 AM
I think that I'm in love with you is the next step to I love you. You can love a someone "I love you" and then when that other person loves you back you're in love together so it's transmografies into I'm in love with you.that's what I think of it =) IP: Logged |
CoralFrequency
Knowflake Posts: 1397
From:
Registered: Feb 2007
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posted July 02, 2008 01:01 AM
I sometimes say "i love you" out of the blue to people, for no particular reason - including familly and friends. Usually I say it if they did or said something that makes me go "wow you're really amazing". Also, I say "love you" at the end of conversations, even when talking to my best friend - just as a good bye "love you, bye!" I think saying "I'm IN LOVE with you" is more of a romantic thing, in a romantic situation. Although depending on how the "i love you" is said.. it can mean "i'm in love with you" - with your bf, parter, date or whoever else lol
IP: Logged |
26taurus
Knowflake Posts: 14898
From: *
Registered: Jun 2004
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posted July 02, 2008 01:03 AM
They are very different scenarios.People often misinterpret them. Think about it?
Youve felt this way, havent you? IP: Logged |
MysticMelody
Moderator Posts: 4514
From:
Registered: Dec 2005
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posted July 02, 2008 02:16 AM
I've recently begun to ponder "in love" as a state of existing "in" "Love", as in a relationship given to God for God's purposes. We can love someone, but to actually consciously make an effort to remain "in" Love, not as in infatuation or lust, but to focus on and make choices based on Love or to surrender to the Will of Love and allow that to guide your relationship is what I now consider to be "in love". But, I don't think that is what most people mean. I think they mean infatuated. Like he can love you and think you are a great person but he doesn't feel infatuated. IP: Logged |
blue moon
Moderator Posts: 4377
From: U.K
Registered: Dec 2007
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posted July 02, 2008 05:23 AM
In love - not an expression appropriately used to describe feelings for a son, sister, etc, and unlikely in the case of best friend. But these relationships are for many people what they would put down as Soul Mate and/or their most profound experiences of love. Marie Helvin was in an interview saying when he sister died it took the lustre off life. I knew exactly what she meant, I've seen sisters separated in this way and the one left behind was never really the same again. I don't think it was this interview but she mentions it here:
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/article554231.ece IP: Logged |
AquaGuy
Knowflake Posts: 124
From: NJ
Registered: Jun 2008
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posted July 02, 2008 07:52 AM
This is how it feels to Me:"I love you" - Nice, but, you love pizza too... "I'm in love with you" - intense, passionate feelings for Her that you don't feel for anybody else... ------------------
February 3 1968... Sun = Aquarius... Ascendant = Libra... Moon + Saturn = Aries... Venus = Capricorn... Jupiter + Uranus + Pluto = Virgo... Mercury + Mars = Pisces... Neptune = Scorpio... IP: Logged |
Lara
Knowflake Posts: 3037
From: London
Registered: Mar 2006
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posted July 02, 2008 09:31 AM
Totally with you on that one, Aqua.Bring on the passion and the intensity! IP: Logged |
thedividedsky
Knowflake Posts: 351
From: utah
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted July 02, 2008 09:41 AM
wouldn't you imagine that if a boyfriend told you he loved you (first may I add) he was IN LOVE with you too?Never assume is what I learned. I learned that mr. gemini loves me but never felt that crazy passionate, i think of you all day long kind of feeling. Which i always have. Just started this thread to make people aware of this issue, which for me was out of the blue. How this can last without him having that feeling I don't know....I ALWAYS have that feeling with new relationships..... IP: Logged |
thedividedsky
Knowflake Posts: 351
From: utah
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted July 02, 2008 09:47 AM
he told me that in the beginning, we've been together for 8 months now.IP: Logged |
breakfast on pluto
Knowflake Posts: 253
From:
Registered: Apr 2006
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posted July 02, 2008 01:39 PM
i love you is a sentence which shows instant emotion;but IN LOVE is a process which continou some time or all time..IP: Logged |
Isis
Knowflake Posts: 1975
From: CA
Registered: Jan 2004
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posted July 02, 2008 03:00 PM
IMO, there is no set definition - I've heard some people insist they're the same thing, others say that "in love" is the romantic version of "I love you", that "i love you" is the more serious version of "in love"....To me, being "in love" comes and goes...you can fall in and out of being in love, but once you truly love someone, it doesn't go away. Having said that, I still think it means whatever it means to you. Before you say it though you might want to make sure you're both working from the same definition. IP: Logged |
~jane_says~
Knowflake Posts: 181
From: USA
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted July 02, 2008 06:48 PM
"In love' is when you're in a constant state of flux kind of like rapture. Feelings of intensity, passion, agression, elation, and sublimation are more specific to a sole source. While "I love you" is more sedate, compassionate, & platonic which is more broadly felt for friends, family and even companions. IP: Logged |
thedividedsky
Knowflake Posts: 351
From: utah
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted July 02, 2008 07:05 PM
thanks everyone....interesting.IP: Logged |
CoralFrequency
Knowflake Posts: 1397
From:
Registered: Feb 2007
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posted July 02, 2008 07:55 PM
thedivided,I did say: quote:
depending on how the "i love you" is said.. it can mean "i'm in love with you" - with your bf, partner, date
In your case, he is your bf and you've been together 8 months. It should've been obvious to anyone with half a brain (and Geminis usually have a full one) that you would take his "i love you's" to mean that he is IN love. So in your scenario, I think he is being jerk-ish. IP: Logged |
Dooza
Knowflake Posts: 160
From: Planet Earth
Registered: May 2008
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posted July 02, 2008 07:59 PM
My ex ended our relationship by saying "I love you, but not in love with you" and then left me for someone they were supposedly "in love" with.IP: Logged |
thedividedsky
Knowflake Posts: 351
From: utah
Registered: Aug 2006
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posted July 02, 2008 08:03 PM
thank you coral.
IP: Logged |
Breezy178
Knowflake Posts: 16
From: CA
Registered: Jun 2008
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posted July 03, 2008 12:22 PM
I think this can be different for everyone, obviously... but to me, here is the difference.Saying I Love You is something I've said to many people, I tell my brothers that all the time, my best friends, my mom... and once to the gas station attendant for realizing that she wasn't really all out of my brand of cigarettes (lol). Love is everywhere...love is the backdrop of life. Sometimes it's hard to see it, but it's always there somehow... However, I would never tell my brothers that I was In Love With Them...nor my best friends.... I believe that being "In Love" is a state of being between two people. I don't believe one person can be In Love with someone who isn't In Love with them in return... I believe that being In Love takes two...I don't think it's a feeling. I can't say it enough, I think it's a state of being that two people are in together... If you've ever seen a couple In Love it's very obvious. But of course, this is just my own opinion and my own experience. I think love and being in it can be different for everyone. IP: Logged |
JustAmanda
Knowflake Posts: 620
From:
Registered: Jan 2003
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posted July 04, 2008 07:32 AM
*hugs to Dooza*I know that hurt you terribly... IP: Logged |
flyin_free_70
Knowflake Posts: 99
From:
Registered: Jun 2008
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posted July 06, 2008 05:01 PM
One of my friends who I hadn't talked to in a while called me once and as we were reminiscing and talking about how each of our lives were going she said "Well I'm in-love with my husband again" This made me really think about the difference between the two....and there IS a difference. I was with my ex for 13 years, and I loved him...I mean how can you be with somebody for that long and NOT love them? I cared about him, I (deep down, since by the end we were fighting like crazy) wanted the best for him, I loved him....but by the end there was no way I was "In Love" with him at all. I love a lot of people. I love my children, I love my family, I even love my friends, but I'm not "in love" with any of them. I think being in love is something we share with only our romantic partners. Also, sometimes when you're in a romatic relationship and you say "I love you"...it really does mean "I'm in love with you" IP: Logged |
LetsDance
Knowflake Posts: 221
From: Where there's dancing...
Registered: Mar 2006
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posted July 06, 2008 07:50 PM
Mystic said:
"God's purposes. We can love someone, but to actually consciously make an effort to remain "in" Love, not as in infatuation or lust, but to focus on and make choices based on Love or to surrender to the Will of Love and allow that to guide your relationship... "Mystic, I feel very much the same way. Breakfast, I couldn't agree more, becoming "in love" is a process. Isis said:
"...but once you truly love someone, it doesn't go away...Before you say it though you might want to make sure you're both working from the same definition." This is so true. Perhaps if this was taken seriously, the lyrics "many a heart has been broken because these three words were spoken" would not apply to "I love you." Thank you, guys. Great thread IP: Logged |
ghanima81
Moderator Posts: 1763
From: MAINE! :)
Registered: Aug 2003
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posted July 07, 2008 11:05 PM
I've always had a hard time with the concept of "love". But... to be "in love", it's that MOMENT. That span of time you are IN with another person. You both feel it. You both look at each other and just .... know. You cannot be "in love" by yourself. That I totally agree with. If you are "in love" with someone, who you are constantly wishing was there, wanting to talk to, wanting to touch, and you are the slightest bit unsure about their intentions, you are not "in love". You are infatuated. Maybe they "love" you. But that moment, that span of time for you both, is not shared. I have this tingling feeling in this thread. Or maybe, with who started it. I feel I must say, he told you what he felt, it was not what you imagined. It was not what you felt. Or, you wanted it to be so much, you ignored what was actually being "said", in order to appease yourself, or not feel that rejection. Move on. I mean that with heart, but.... ... this seems shady to me... Anyone else? IP: Logged |
Love
Knowflake Posts: 997
From: Canada
Registered: Feb 2006
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posted July 08, 2008 08:43 PM
Dooza ~I can sooooo relate. That happened to me over a year ago and I'm still trying to find total acceptance of it. I almost wish, however, that he'd found someone he was actually "in love" with...in the end he was happier being single than being with me. And I was totally in love with him. Ugh. As for Love: "In love" is definitely a term in our culture that implies not only passion, but also that longevity of feeling is possible. In my experience, women tend to be far more comfortable telling their significant others "I love you" even before they are "in love". Men tend to reserve saying "I love you" for when they are "In love", at least within the context of intimate relationships. Personally, I tell people I love them often. I think it's really great to be reminded that we're loved  IP: Logged |
Heart--Shaped Cross
Knowflake Posts: 8980
From: 11/6/78 11:38am Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004
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posted July 08, 2008 09:27 PM
quote:
This is how it feels to Me:
"I love you" - Nice, but, you love pizza too..."I'm in love with you" - intense, passionate feelings for Her that you don't feel for anybody else...
 AquaGuy
IP: Logged |
buena36
Knowflake Posts: 421
From: Centre of Europe
Registered: Jul 2008
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posted July 19, 2008 06:56 AM
Hello,I think that: "I am in love with you" is much deeper than "I love you". How many men say to their wife: "I love you" but
"I have fallen in love" with somebody else and then leaves his wife. I can love many things, but can
"Be in love" only with some man. Buena
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Never say never! IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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