posted January 25, 2009 07:51 PM         

quote:

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Lexx, regarding your reply post (I don't want to take up too much room since it's a little off-subject), we cling.

That's putting it simply. See, the thing is, when I decide on someone, I'd prefer if they just lay down their arms and give in fully to me, and if they don't, then I try to force the issue. I admit, it's pushy. And it's not right or fair, but we want what we want and we'll keep at it until we give up hope. I totally understand your pov, and it's possible you've come in contact with people who were a little bit...too much in this department, but the feeling in general is common (though usually to a lesser extent). I think perhaps an Aries could understand this, and in a different way, a Scorpio might. It's a very aggressive way of pursuing, but I think with Taureans, it could be about worth. I'm worth getting to know, and I'm worth initial effort right away. If you don't agree, then I have to make you agree that I rock. Simplistic way of looking at it, but it taps into a deep-seated fear that we're not good enough, if someone decides to put us on hold or delay us in any way.

And thanks for the welcome.

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I am disabled and when a few Taureans got upset at me.....I could not get it through their heads that I do not have guests
because I cannot know from hour to hour if I can. It has been like that for nigh on two decades. Only a few folks I have known a long time will I let visit me. They understand I may have to take to bed throughout their visit, or send them home if I feel too ill. (They (the ones who felt rejected) offered to visit by my bedside...well if I am down, I am in pain, or agony, and definitely NOT up for chatty times!) I simply cannot accommodate folks who are hours or days away. It would not be fair to have them come and my not being up to even letting them in. The conversations can be had by phone or e-mail. It was/is not a rejection at all, it is just how it is for me. (My living conditions are also meager and there is nowhere for visitors to stay overnight, or sit comfortably)
I hope someday my financial situation will improve and I can have a guest house for out of my area guests to stay at, and then I would feel comfortable having such visitors.
However, I need to know them awhile, and well, and feel it important we have enough in common to be friends.
You sound like the kind of person who could understand.
Again...
Blessings to you WaterDog!

posted January 26, 2009 05:23 AM         

quote:

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To me when I'm emotionally involved then the world cease to exist other than the subject of my affection....this the most exhausting tendency.

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I hear you Matilda and Kaira. What exhausts me about my tendency to get obsessed is expecting the other person to be equally obsessed with me. And when they aren't... (because they're normal and healthy!) that's when the problems begin. That's what's dangerous about it.

Kaira, I think this has parallels with your other thread about maintaining boundaries and not losing yourself in a relationship. I thought that was a very honest thread and whilst I didn't comment on it I thought about it a lot, as I have the same problem. I am actively separating myself from my SO more now, and not indulging myself in thinking about him all the time, trying to see him in a less "passionate" and idealistic way and trying more to see him as a human being. It is helping and I now see my relationship in a healthier way and I have fewer expectations and I am less shocked and upset when he doesn't conform my idea of what his behaviour should be.

posted January 28, 2009 04:53 PM           

But your post touched upon something that I've been concerned about for a while now (your subject pertaining to a much bigger concern, that is). I don't think it's unhealthy just because it's different. Some of our greatest true love stories come from people who feel this way. Now, I will agree that if someone loses who they are, or is damaging someone in some way because of it, then it's unhealthy. But I've never lost myself in my obsessions, just reveled.

posted January 29, 2009 04:52 PM           

Love,

posted February 05, 2009 03:22 PM         

yeah, I know what you mean about two scorpios not taking each other on--I experienced that strange terror--that may be because both heavily need something they can't give each other

I don't know, It's strange, most of the time I disregard astrology, and then sometimes I could swear it explains everything...who knows after all...only by listening...by simply letting the moment wash over you and letting things be can we really be ourselves I guess

I seem to be learning to control this obsession with obsessions, it still happens, and I'm in one at the time being. I'm obsessed with my boyfriend's best friend, and I think it actually helps that we are forced to be so close all the time. It hurts, but it constantly pushes me into seeing him as a human, as something divisible from me--as something I cannot keep but should and must learn to love in a human fashion. I force myself painfully to cut me off from my own heavy feelings, and though it may just be getting jammed into the shadow, to people it seems like I am somewhat normal I think--I don't even know if that makes sense but oh well it does or doesn't

posted February 05, 2009 08:51 PM         

"so it depends how resistant you are to letting go of everything extraneous/distracting. anything that is holding you back from experienceing their very deep understanding of intimacy along with them."

posted February 24, 2009 11:25 PM           

For now talking to my Capricorn Sun/Scorpio Moon Conjuct Pluto, Saturn sextile Pluto, Pluto conjust Ascendant friend as been really helpful in exploring these depths that recede deep within my conscious.

posted May 12, 2009 07:18 AM         

I’m a Cancerian and whenever I’m taking a flight away from my Scorp, I’ll end up crying, moping, looking miserable, filled with angst before traveling while he’s the one in control getting whatever I need, ensuring the ticket is in order, setting the alarm so we don’t miss our flight, totally in charge. I’ve literally said his mastery over emotions is commendable against my being a mess but he just responds with a smile, hug or kiss. When I leave though, having expressed my emotions, my inner turmoil is nowhere near his intensity - Business associates meeting him in that WEEK comment that he looks like he’s in mourning.

LetsDance, yeah, they do need someone to prevent them from getting lost and it has to be someone who can handle it – not everyone can. They tend to learn this growing up which is why most of them tend to become secretive, less talkative, even slightly neurotic – from keeping everything in. I think ‘topshelf’ said something to similar effect perfectly above.

posted May 18, 2009 03:02 AM         

You two are right, so right.

I totally know what you both are talking about.

Obe, I understand you now. I'm learning more and more about my scorpio. I've never been afraid of him or his intensity. Credit it to my Piscean,Cancerian and Capricornian placements.

There are too many times when I look at him and KNOW his struggle behind all the "bravado". Sometimes I am very protective of him---from myself! I scold myself sometimes for being so stubborn with him (yeah, I can be a bear--but sometimes he provokes it. I don't like being that way).

But I'm coming to know him more and more everyday. He doesn't even know how much I understand about him. And I don't mean from talking to him or whatnot, because he can be elusive. It's just from being around him. I'm like a freaking sponge...

He'd pass out if knew how well I'm coming to know him.

posted June 17, 2009 09:09 AM         

Help me figure this one out:

I have a scorp friend, he is my BFF, but at the moment I am highly p*ssed off at him.
Here's the backstory.....

He met a girl 8 years his senior about 10 years ago. He had a fake I.D. and snuck into the bar where she was a regular. (she's a virgo, BTW, don't have anymore info then that, as far as astro)
Anyway, they dated on and off for 7 years. She slept around with EVERYONE, and he always found out about it. She stole from him. He had/has a great job and he was just starting out with credit, so he got a card or two, and long to short, she ended up getting him 30 grand in debt.
She's fairly attractive, no raving beauty. And the head games! She would dump him every other month for a "better" guy, meaning someone who had more money, or would buy her drugs, as my friend would not.
She convinced him to let his lease go on his place, and move in with her.
They lived in bliss for one week, untill she forgot to come home for three days, and when she did she was with another man, and high on whatever.

Finally, his parents, friends, everyone he knew, got him to let go of her. And start rebuilding his life, and his credit rating!

He dated another girl for about a year, they seemed great together, but he was always complaining that she did not make enough money??????

Then he got with another friend of mine, they had sort of a whirlwind courtship, and he moved in with her, and has been living there for a year.
They do everything together.
He told me he would never marry her, but that he loved her, and he was happy.

posted June 19, 2009 06:24 PM         

They can't help it, they were born that way, better get used to it.

posted June 21, 2009 02:46 PM         

She acted so genuinely happy when we were physically together. So sweet, so affectionate, so assuring. We only met a couple weeks ago, but as is so often the case when two water signs come together, there is an immediate feeling of completeness. Her Cancer Moon has already talked about living together, and our first house, and we went to f*cking Home Depot and hung f*cking curtains!!! And for the first time in my life I let down my guard early, everything just felt so right.

She came on soooo strong, and I responded, now I feel like I'm solely carrying the torch and I just want to ignore her and hope she comes around. It seems like being out of sight is truly out of mind for her, and I get the feeling she's seeing (and f*cking) other guys despite saying that she isn't.