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Author
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Topic: letter to my ex aqua make any difference?
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confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 11:12 AM
 
hmm...i did everything that could have been done to drive an aqua away...been 12 years relationship and he is very hurt and says he hates me... 
i mean he hates me because he is really really mad! we had a fight and i really lost my temper and did things i shouldnt have done,....its been a month now..we just have 1 liner sms contacts once in 10 days regarding work thats it.
i have deeply realized my mistakes and want to apologize sincerely...dont know what to do since he is acting distant... will a letter written form all my heart make any difference??..i want to open up all my feeling and tell him what made me do the things i did, i really love and care for him, what i did was only out of anger ..and other details ...pls adviseIP: Logged |
stopandstare
Knowflake Posts: 94
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 12:23 PM
i'm sorry about what you're going through...if at all possible, i highly recommend doing this in person. it will make a world of difference. no matter how scary or how difficult, if you can somehow find a way to do it in person.... good luck  IP: Logged |
GypseeWind
Knowflake Posts: 937
From: Dayton,Ohio USA
Registered: May 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 04:04 PM
Yes, yes, yes, write it now, if possible. A heartfelt letter is a treasured gift and much more valuable than a conversation (IMHO) because the 'receiver' can read and re-read and take time to absorb all your words and feelings.
Letters have been a major healing tool in my life, I highly recommend it.IP: Logged |
Diana
Knowflake Posts: 514
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 05:21 PM
I agree with Gypsee.IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 05:36 PM
thank you for ur replies ..the thing is ..he says i have done too much damage to him and he is done with the relationship :'(
he wants to move on ..just thinking that he wanted to get married to me very soon makes me break down.... i agree i did the damage but i cannot accept that he hates me so very much all of a sudden..
i think i will cry alot while writing this letter..because there are so many things in my heart right now that he is gone forever!..
i wanted to ask all of you because i have heard aquas dont like display of emotions, and i know my letter will make him emotional so i was confused... btw he is sun/mercury aqua , venus in picses and asc in cancer....
IP: Logged |
Lara
Knowflake Posts: 1247
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 07:06 PM
DON'T SEND HIM A LETTER... he's an AQUARIAN!!!Do it in person, please! oh, and be strong - Aqua's hate weak women  IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 09:30 PM
I disagree with you lara. I think gypseewind is right, a letter will give him more space, he'll be able to read it .... Well that is only if he wants toSo you have to do it now. Dont wait. Do it. Show him that u've changed. Not that you understood but THAT U CHANGED. He wants to see the change in real when you ll be be back together. He's pobably serious about the end, so if u want him, show him that u are serious about the change too But dont wait. Be yourself and let him the space to think it through. So a letter is better for that. Again, words mean nothing. An aqua man here Ps: i take risk because i dont know your story but i think he want the same as you. He wants to be with someone stable with whom he can be commited in the long run now.
Nothing is lost, everything is lost. And you can have it all, or loose everything with him.  IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 09:37 PM
About the letter, i wouldnt go to much in details about the reasons for why it went wrong. Dont develop that part much. Just prooves him that that you know and you've got what he wants. A stable, trustworthy, longhaul, committed relationship. And THEN, give him much time to reread and reread your letter. And dont forget if he calls u back later on that he'll be looking for proof of change (whatever, it's your story), proof that he can put everything he wants to have into YOUR hands. And it wont be THE end.
IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 09:42 PM
Im cancer rising, venus in pisces mercury pisces though and aqua sun. Emotional reading alone, whenever he wants is much better than face to face where he might react with overemotions. Letter is good, good, good.Sorry, tired frenchman cant write anymore. 3:41 am here  Good night IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 09:58 PM
Last thing, if he's cancer rising, his desc is cappy, so saturn. He wants stability. Long term. Not flashy but serious. Boring is fine. Veeeeery fine. Sleepers style, cosy, discreet, reassuring, reassuring, reassuring... Boring, longhaul, life!Or that's just me, well life sounds like a prison verdict so that's scary but myself, im looking for a reliable partner that i can be proud of in society and comfy within intimacy. Think cancer, him, and cappy, you. Well that can change too because he's aqua, like me so cappy can be him sometimes and cancer you. BTW cancer is not a disease  , it is about feeling confortable to share pretty much everything. No restrictions. Good combo with gem and aqua who never stop to share. Good luck IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 10:03 PM
U see, me writing like five post to say pretty much the samz thing, well, this is very much cancer feeling confy-dent or confy-table sorry, the last one is not so funny Cancer... Need someone that know how to hold it and get there though. Balance 
IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 10:06 PM
Ps: by balance i meant equilibrium.Gem is fine Phewww, good night and good luck. Now write it! IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 10:52 PM
Just tell him what you think is right.If you want to vent your stress, do it here. Ok? I hope i didnt scare you. IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 11:15 PM
haha peri ur sooooo sweet...i really smiled after a month i think!..i really appreciate everyones reply and peri your reply gives me some hope...right now i am just lost and broken because he has made his final decision and has involved his family and friends in it makes me cry alot but yes the reason i want to write that letter is because as you said..he will read..and re read..and re read..it will take alot of re reading for him to really understand how i feel, i guess if he is meant to be mine he will come back...although he was so upset that he said he is done with the relationship! i already apologized verbaly but he was too upset to even understand me...he keept saying dont push me! so i stopped and left him alone.
i guess yes when ever he is ready he will read.
never knew all that water in his chart would boil up to this one day! IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 11:25 PM
and dont worry peri i will not upset him this time ..in general i will just apologize , tell him how i realized my mistake and can not move on with this pain that he hates me ..and let him know this was the most amazing relationship i had with him..he was my first true love and wish him all the best for his future....
he is venus in picses i am venus in cancer..i have been very clingy and possesive...awwww cant blame me i did always mother him around ..he told me he secretely loved that about me and thats why couldnt leave me all these years..but ... too much of a good thing is bad enough...~sigh!IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 12, 2009 11:28 PM
i am off to bed..goodnight everyone.IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 13, 2009 08:41 PM
ok guys i wrote it...hmmm...still not sure to give him or not..
i spoke to one of my friends today she said she had done the same thing, even after the letter the guy did not come back to her but got married to someone else , after 2 years of his marriage he called her one night and told her the exact same words that she had written to him in that letter, he told her that that letter makes him realise what he has lost!..what he had was true love!
too bad guys realise it when its too late!..i guess their male ego gets in the way and they dont want to get back with their girlfriends when they break up, they show how strong they are for that very moment when their girlfriends are pleading them not to leave for they truely love them.......
years later they eventualy realise what they had and what they have lost! ..too badIP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 18, 2009 05:44 AM
Hey, CG, everything ok? IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 18, 2009 11:52 AM
hi pire, i havent sent the letter yet because due to some business reasons (need him to sign some bank documents for me as we once shared a joint account) i will have to meet him once again in a weeks time.. i dont want to put myself and him in an embarassing situation as i wont be able to face him if he says no after reading the letter...so i will first have the last meeting.. apologize personaly and then... send him my last letter.... its less painful that way...
i am not keeping my hopes high..i have accepted the things that happened my apology is a must..i have really really hurt him and i dont want to end this way.. i love him too much to leave him with such bitterness in his heart <3IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 26, 2009 10:42 AM
Have you seen him yet?I hope u are ok... And friends with you. IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 28, 2009 06:30 PM
pire i am just so scared.. i hope my letter and my words have an effect on him.
today i met 1 of his friends and he told me ..'you lost him because of your temper, he was madly in love with you..you were everything to him but you never saw how much you hurt him' .. peri i feel so bad..i wish everyone stops telling me how much he loved me .. he is very sensitive and emotional ..unlike usual aquas.. pls pray that my words have an effect on his heart.. i feel terriable.. i have realised my mistakes when what i had is gone ... i am determine to make things better but there is not much hope
i will inform you as soon as i get in touch with him... need your best wishes
IP: Logged |
Antiquarianbookcollector
Knowflake Posts: 247
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 28, 2009 07:08 PM
Confused gemini, perhaps you should give the guy some room to heal then try to re-establish contact. Perhaps everyone is saying those things to gently remind you to let this guy heal from his pain. I don't know the whole situation but the effect will be negative if you try to push the issue when it is apparently too fresh for the both of you. Probably send the letter and say that when you feel ready we can talk about it? Might be totally off on that advice. All the best!IP: Logged |
pire
Knowflake Posts: 449
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 30, 2009 05:39 AM
ABC, i agree with you. confused gemini IP: Logged |
confused gemini
Knowflake Posts: 23
From:
Registered: Jun 2009
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posted July 30, 2009 08:25 AM
thank you ABC .. yes i too agree with you like pire, its been more than a month now with no contact, i take everyones advise on this and will not push him, i will apologize and give him the space and time to heal.. if hes mine he will be back .. and if not , its a long road to recovery and alot of soul searching for me..
i will keep u posted on my last meeting.IP: Logged |
Diana
Knowflake Posts: 514
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted August 02, 2009 02:06 PM
No offense, but I hate how people say aqua's have no feelings and aren't emotional. They are one of the most emotional and sensitive of the signs. They just hide it well, that is why they always get hurt by people who think they can say or do whatever they want, because they think the aqua can handle it and has no feelings. It's so not true. That's why people lose them. If you get back together you will have to be more aware that he is sensitive. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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