posted January 31, 2014 02:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Bluejay:
I think that there definitely was a reason that you were so attracted to him immediately, especially since you said this was not a feeling that you'd had before. I felt that way about a man that I met almost 9 years ago. I'm never easily impressed with anyone, but this guy just turned my world upside down from the moment we looked at each other. My first thought was that we were on the same vibration, and I knew he felt it too. I was in a relationship, so I wasn't in a position to act on it. I could barely talk to him because I thought the sexual tension was so obvious that people around us would know. Ugh, now that I'm single he's married. Not a day goes by that I don't think about him. So definitely seize the day and tell the guy! If you feel too awkward about it maybe you can just slip him your number. At this point, since you're befriending his friends maybe you should just message him on FB. I cringed when I read that part, but if you do end up getting to know him better, you should be honest. If he's not flattered that you looked him up, then he probably isn't right for you to begin with. You never know, maybe you were meant to meet the friend, and the post office crush was a stepping stone.

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I can definitely identify with those feelings. Looking back on things now, maybe i shouldn't have emailed the friend about his website but i genuinely was interested in the site's content because it struck home to me in a way. I'd seen his friends pics on fb and thought oh who is he, and yes i thought he was attractive and now too very intelligent and seemingly nice.

I did think that maybe it was meant as a way for me to meet the friend but to be honest, i'm hoping thats not the case because why were my feelings that strong for the postal guy. I'd feel cheated by fate or something. Im not very easily impressed either. I'm afraid of sending him a message on fb but il have to bite the bullet an stake a chance if i don't see him again next week.

posted January 31, 2014 08:21 PM            

I also think you should be honest that once you found his profile, you saw his friend and you were genuinely interested in his work so you contacted him. That's where it gets a bit awkward, but if you were to have a relationship and the friend realized he knew you, that would be way worse. I would feel it was a violation of trust.

posted January 31, 2014 11:38 PM            

You are so right. I like the way you summed up how i should tell him because i was unsure of what/how to say it. Thank you i will do just that. I love researching people etc. Im good at finding out things lol

posted February 01, 2014 03:01 AM            

Carpe diem..... For real!!! The worst that could happen is that you get rejected. Trust me, there is no worse feeling than wondering "what if"?

posted February 02, 2014 07:20 PM            

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Originally posted by Gracha:
Also I'm beginning to think I've crossed a boundary with the friend, maybe i shouldn't have emailed him and now I'm beginning to have doubts about everything.

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posted February 04, 2014 01:12 AM            

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Originally posted by starmoon:
ummm.. yeah. you're stalking. leave him alone. if you like him ask him out. don't stalk and pretend you have good intentions by emailing others in the hopes it'll get you to him. how would a man like knowing you did that? it'd be scary, not romantic.

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posted February 04, 2014 01:16 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Bluejay:
I wrote him an anonymous letter years ago confessing my feelings, but it was a pretty lame way to let my feelings be known. At the time my ex pretty much packed up and left me in the state where we were living to move back into his parent's house. In hindsight, I don't care if I was humiliated in front of the whole world. I should have gone for the gold and let my intentions be known, especially because there was a mutual attraction.

Carpe diem..... For real!!! The worst that could happen is that you get rejected. Trust me, there is no worse feeling than wondering "what if"?

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posted February 04, 2014 01:18 AM            

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Originally posted by Hera:
Ohhhh, interesting about the friend!! Plot thickens!

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posted February 04, 2014 04:29 AM            

I never found out whether he got the letter. That was back in 2006.

posted February 04, 2014 05:24 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gracha:
Lol the friend is nice surprisingly.

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posted February 16, 2014 05:53 AM            

I went to the post office again (twice) and haven't seen him. I'm backing way off because I think he's married based on what the friend has said. I suspected it anyway. So this one is gone. It was probably a karmic test or something. I'm giving this one up. So I've become "interested" in someone I work with who've joined the company recently. It's funny because I don't work with a lot of guys and I've never been interested in the men I have worked with in the past. There's something in the air because I haven't dated no one serious in about two years and I'm getting to meet guys now i think have potential. It's like when you're single no one wants you but when you're taken they're attracted like bees to honey. I believe I'm getting closer to meeting the man I'll spend my life with, I can feel it. I'm getting invites to social events and I've lost a little weight and have been working on having a positive outlook on dating.

posted February 16, 2014 05:58 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Hera:
Enjoy the time spent talking to the friend, Gracha. Sometimes people meet just to talk or awaken something in the other. It doesn't have to be romantic, but it can or might influence one or both of you in the long run.

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I agree although I've stopped talking to the friend as much because he lives in another state. I'm going to focus more on real life romantic relationships because I've never really did this in the past. Postal guy is more than likely married as per the friend. I still haven't seen him. This one is over. Thank you so much for the advice!!!!

posted February 19, 2014 11:38 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Hera:
Next one will be better!

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posted March 05, 2014 10:10 PM            

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Originally posted by Mystic Melody:
The Universe works in mysterious way. You could have had those strong feelings simply to draw you to LindaLand or to open up a door to talk to Bluejay. Thank you for sharing your experience... it helps more people than you know.
#magicoflindaland

Wow, that's deep. It's been my pleasure. I'm happy if i can help someone and I'm wishing the best for bluejay!

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posted March 06, 2014 03:33 AM            

"He never mentioned being married, and I thought he was single, but I saw his wife once when my ex and I went to his house. I saw her from afar, and I honestly thought it was his mom! He looks younger than his age, he's 44 now, she's 52, I'm 33. Oddly enough his wife's birthday is 5 days after mine, but with a 19 year age difference. That puts my north/south nodes just a couple of degrees away from hers....very weird. I feel bad about that, because I'm much more attractive than most women my age, I'm not full of myself, but it's the truth. I certainly wouldn't want to be in her shoes, with a much younger, attractive woman having this weird intellectual, spiritual and sexual chemistry with my husband."

For jjj,

I'm a very empathetic person, and I was stating that I would not want to be in her shoes due to the age gap, the difference in physical attractiveness, and the fact that I have so much in common with him personality and career wise. I personally would be very threatened and consumed with jealousy to be in her situation, so I'm very mindful of that. I believe in the Golden Rule....to do unto others as I would have others do unto me, which is why I'm not involving myself with him even on a platonic level. I was never suggesting that I win because I'm younger and prettier. He also told me he doesn't love his wife, but as long as he's married he's off limits, so that's a moot point. He is choosing to stay in an unhappy situation for financial reasons, and so he has made his choice.