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Author
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Topic: Advise and help needed from fellas Capri
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Mystic Melody
Knowflake Posts: 748
From: IL
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted July 25, 2016 08:59 PM
  
Did you write the letter? Did she write back? What did she say?
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sugarflapjacks
Knowflake Posts: 235
From: southeasternseaboard
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted July 25, 2016 11:43 PM
Hi there. I'm sorry you are feeling this way. You've gotten some great advice. You behaved with respect and as a gentleman and cap women want that in a man. So if she isn't attracted to you romantically after that, it's not you, it's her.I was going to write a similar answer as Mystic wrote. You are her friend. Now, granted, caps can seem funny in the onset of things. I've only dealt with the male cap and usually you can tell pretty quickly if they are interested, but they WILL pull back just when you think you're both on the same page. So if the women are the similar, BUT your lady didn't show you any kind of reciprocal affection, well, maybe you knew this -- and that's why you only tried to hold her hand?
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zyuan24
Newflake Posts: 15
From:
Registered: Jun 2016
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posted July 26, 2016 03:37 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Mystic Melody:
Did you write the letter? Did she write back? What did she say?
Yep. I did write a "snail mail" to her. So far didn't get any news. I'm curious whether did she check the letter box lol quote:
Originally posted by sugarflapjacks:
Hi there. I'm sorry you are feeling this way. You've gotten some great advice. You behaved with respect and as a gentleman and cap women want that in a man. So if she isn't attracted to you romantically after that, it's not you, it's her.I was going to write a similar answer as Mystic wrote. You are her friend. Now, granted, caps can seem funny in the onset of things. I've only dealt with the male cap and usually you can tell pretty quickly if they are interested, but they WILL pull back just when you think you're both on the same page. So if the women are the similar, BUT your lady didn't show you any kind of reciprocal affection, well, maybe you knew this -- and that's why you only tried to hold her hand?
Actually there is reciprocal affection and that's the reason why I tried to hold her hand. Few days later since that, she told me that she felt too rush only.
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sugarflapjacks
Knowflake Posts: 235
From: southeasternseaboard
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted July 26, 2016 07:22 AM
quote:
Originally posted by zyuan24:
Actually there is reciprocal affection and that's the reason why I tried to hold her hand. Few days later since that, she told me that she felt too rush only.
It doesn't sound reciprocal based on your original post, that's why I asked. quote:
Originally posted by zyuan24:
So on our last date which also when we watch movie together in her house, I hold her hand and nothing happen till I went home. So the next days onward, things started to change. She started to be cold to me till I ask is "there anything happened to you". She responded that I was too rush and freak her out and mentioned that we should stop see-ing each other. We talked this out and I stepped back a little but things turn to worse.
quote:
Originally posted by zyuan24:
She would just say "Thing turns out to rush for me" and later on no more reply.
I really think you should back off her and let her contact you when she wants to see or talk to you. Maybe let her miss you? I don't know. If holding someone's hand freaks them out so much that they want to stop seeing you, that doesn't sound reciprocal. She told you she wasn't playing games with you when you "scolded" her, yet you still won't respect her answer. This may sound blunt, and I get that you like her. But people need to realize that not everyone is playing hard to get or want the pursuit, there are many times when "no" means "No". Your intentions are probably good, but don't let your good be evil spoken of and end up making her run away from you.
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zyuan24
Newflake Posts: 15
From:
Registered: Jun 2016
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posted July 26, 2016 10:44 AM
quote:
Originally posted by sugarflapjacks:
I really think you should back off her and let her contact you when she wants to see or talk to you. Maybe let her miss you? I don't know. If holding someone's hand freaks them out so much that they want to stop seeing you, that doesn't sound reciprocal. She told you she wasn't playing games with you when you "scolded" her, yet you still won't respect her answer. This may sound blunt, and I get that you like her. But people need to realize that not everyone is playing hard to get or want the pursuit, there are many times when "no" means "No". Your intentions are probably good, but don't let your good be evil spoken of and end up making her run away from you.
Yep. Perhaps I'll just back off. If after some time and she still didn't contact. I would say that's the end of story.
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Randall
Webmaster Posts: 72120
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 27, 2016 02:52 PM
Probably so.IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 72120
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 28, 2016 02:51 PM
I agree. Once you "disappear," she might miss you.IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 72120
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 29, 2016 02:59 PM
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.IP: Logged |
zyuan24
Newflake Posts: 15
From:
Registered: Jun 2016
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posted July 30, 2016 12:12 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
I agree. Once you "disappear," she might miss you.
quote:
Originally posted by Randall:
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Hopefully things would turn out good :|
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sugarflapjacks
Knowflake Posts: 235
From: southeasternseaboard
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted July 30, 2016 02:38 AM
And don't put your life on hold.
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zyuan24
Newflake Posts: 15
From:
Registered: Jun 2016
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posted July 31, 2016 11:36 AM
Oh well well, I guess that's the end of story for me.
She just told me that "I just know from the bottom of my heart that you are not someone I'm looking for to be with for the rest of my life"
This is the most direct answer I even get  IP: Logged |
Mystic Melody
Knowflake Posts: 748
From: IL
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted July 31, 2016 05:56 PM
zyuan24, someday she will think of you and wonder if she made the right decision. If you two are meant to be, she will be back. If you are not meant to be, then you will find the right person for you if you keep your heart open and soft and keep praying. IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 72120
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 31, 2016 06:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by zyuan24:
Oh well well, I guess that's the end of story for me.
She just told me that "I just know from the bottom of my heart that you are not someone I'm looking for to be with for the rest of my life"
This is the most direct answer I even get
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sugarflapjacks
Knowflake Posts: 235
From: southeasternseaboard
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 17, 2016 03:17 PM
zyuan24, you were authentic. I know you feel bad, but please see the courage in what you did. You put your heart out there. Have no regrets. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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