posted April 14, 2012 04:55 PM            

Me--

Planetary positions
planet sign degree motion
Sun Taurus 22°46'23 in house 10 direct
Moon Virgo 24°01'04 in house 3 direct
Mercury Gemini 9°55'01 in house 11 direct
Venus Gemini 2°14'42 in house 11 direct
Mars Taurus 13°37'54 in house 10 direct
Jupiter Libra 0°44'39 in house 3 retrograde
Saturn Libra 3°25'00 in house 3 retrograde
Uranus Scorpio 28°20'08 in house 4retrograde
Neptune Sagittarius 24°17'33 in house 5
retrograde
Pluto Libra 22°09'10 end of house3retrograde
True Node Leo 4°50'06 in house 12 retrograde
Planets at the end of a house are interpreted in the next house.

House positions (Placidus)
Ascendant Leo 8°55'32
2nd House Leo 28°40'28
3rd House Virgo 23°14'06
Imum Coeli Libra 24°44'26
5th House Sagittarius 2°08'36
6th House Capricorn 8°32'38
Descendant Aquarius 8°55'32
8th House Aquarius 28°40'28
9th House Pisces 23°14'06
Medium Coeli Aries 24°44'26
11th House Gemini 2°08'36
12th House Cancer 8°32'38

Major aspects

Sun Trine Moon 1°15
Sun Trine Jupiter 7°58
Sun Opposition Uranus 5°34
Sun Quincunx Neptune 1°31
Sun Quincunx Pluto 0°37
Moon Conjunction Jupiter 6°44
Moon Sextile Uranus 4°19
Moon Square Neptune 0°16
Mercury Sextile Ascendant 0°59
Venus Trine Jupiter 1°30
Venus Trine Saturn 1°10
Venus Opposition Uranus 3°55
Mars Square Ascendant 4°42
Jupiter Conjunction Saturn 2°40
Jupiter Sextile Uranus 2°25
Saturn Sextile Uranus 5°05
Saturn Sextile Ascendant 5°31
Neptune Sextile Pluto 2°08

Him 1 --

Planetary positions
planet sign degree motion
Sun Libra 28°46'39 in house 9 direct
Moon Capricorn 1°54'44 in house 12 direct
Mercury Libra 11°47'53 in house 8 direct
Venus Libra 25°34'20 in house 9 direct
Mars Sagittarius 23°01'19 in house 11 direct
Jupiter Scorpio 16°02'30 in house 9 direct
Saturn Libra 25°36'36 in house 9 direct
Uranus Sagittarius 2°45'59 in house 10 direct
Neptune Sagittarius 24°51'16 in house 11 direct
Pluto Libra 26°56'18 in house 9 direct
True Node Cancer 6°35'47 in house 6 retrograde

House positions (Placidus)

Ascendant Capricorn °31'54
2nd House Pisces 14°26'25
3rd House Aries 25°27'27
Imum Coeli Taurus 22°27'10
5th House Gemini 12°50'09
6th House Cancer 1°34'44
Descendant Cancer 23°31'54
8th House Virgo 14°26'25
9th House Libra 25°27'27
Medium Coeli Scorpio 22°27'10
11th House Sagittarius 12°50'09
12th House Capricorn 1°34'44

Major aspects

Sun Sextile Moon 3°08
Sun Conjunction Venus 3°12
Sun Sextile Mars 5°45
Sun Conjunction Saturn 3°10
Sun Sextile Neptune 3°55
Sun Conjunction Pluto 1°50
Sun Square Ascendant 5°15
Moon Sextile Venus 6°20
Moon Sextile Saturn 6°18
Moon Conjunction Neptune 7°03
Moon Sextile Pluto 4°58
Venus Sextile Mars 2°33
Venus Conjunction Saturn 0°02
Venus Sextile Neptune 0°43
Venus Conjunction Pluto 1°22
Venus Square Ascendant 2°02
Mars Sextile Saturn 2°35
Mars Conjunction Neptune 1°50
Mars Sextile Pluto 3°55
Saturn Sextile Neptune 0°45
Saturn Conjunction Pluto 1°20
Saturn Square Ascendant 2°05
Neptune Sextile Pluto 2°05
Pluto Square Ascendant 3°24

Him 2 --

Planetary positions

planet sign degree motion
Sun Gemini 29°41'53 in house 8 direct
Moon Libra 28°08'01 in house 12 direct
Mercury Cancer 5°03'45 end of house 8 direct
Venus Leo 14°50'00 in house 10 direct
Mars Leo 15°26'58 in house 10 direct
Jupiter Leo 12°33'32 in house 10 direct
Saturn Aquarius 5°52'21 in house 3retrograde
Uranus Capricorn 12°20'16 in house 3 retrograde
Neptune Capricorn 15°49'02 in house 3 retrogade
Pluto Scorpio 17°56'03 in house 1 retrograde
True Node Capricorn 19°05'50 in house 3
retrograde

House positions (Placidus)

Ascendant Scorpio 4°53'08
2nd House Sagittarius 3°25'29
3rd House Capricorn 6°32'20
Imum Coeli Aquarius 12°11'41
5th House Pisces 15°13'42
6th House Aries 12°40'47
Descendant Taurus 4°53'08
8th House Gemini 3°25'29
9th House Cancer 6°32'20
Medium Coeli Leo 12°11'41
11th House Virgo 15°13'42
12th House Libra 12°40'47

Major aspects

posted April 14, 2012 06:17 PM            

Sorry you are going through love troubles right now!

But is it possible you could create a synastry chart for us on astro.com? It would be much easier to help out if I could have a visual aid.

posted April 15, 2012 05:52 AM            

http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/190/astro61gw0117medude5121.gif/ http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/820/chart.pdf/

posted April 16, 2012 01:08 AM            

Also, as another user said, make sure NOT to link us to your astro.com account next time for your own web safety. You can upload the synastry image to a host like Flickr to ensure no one hacks you! :')

posted April 16, 2012 11:05 AM            

Guy #1 (URL = http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/708/astro61gw0111medude1504.gif/)

This relationship has many of his personal planets in your 4th house. In fact, most of his planets are in your chart BELOW the horizon, so I'm guessing this is a highly intimate relationship and one that deals with more emotional rather than professional circumstances. Like, you two are not trying to further one another's careers, for example or connect on similar feelings about social issues and how to change them? (That would be, I'm thinking, if he had many planets in your 9th, 10th and/or 11th houses).

The 4th house is a watery house. It is ruled by Cancer, or the Moon. So I am assuming this guy brings out a lot of Cancerian feelings in you. It is INTENSE to have a 4th house stellium... the 4th house is a sensitive area in the chart. With his Sun here, you may feel you want to protect and nurture him. Perhaps this is why you feel deeply affected by relationship issues with this man. He has a place deep in your heart. That much, by this chart, is true.

Mercury is in house 3. This means you two probably enjoy talking about more intellectual or less superficial topics. You two probably 'get' each other on a mental level... his Mercury is trine your Mercury.

The Moon is in house 5. I'm thinking this means that he nurtures your creative instinct, or maybe you wouldn't mind having children with this man, since the 5th house is about fun, games and children. The Moon is highly sensitive and represents nurturing and care. Having the Moon here means that domestic issues will be significant in the union. This is not a union that has a flurry of passion or on-and-off feelings, I'm guessing. Maybe this guy is attracted to the expressive side of your personality; or on the flip side, maybe HE is bringing out the creative side of you, or maybe he is emphasizing creative and romantic activities in your life. Any of these scenarios or more than one could work. But what I'm getting so far is that this relationship is very emotionally intense.

At the same time, maybe this could cause grief. The Moon makes many stress aspects, a quincunx to your Venus, and squares to Saturn and Jupiter. Moon square Saturn is a notoriously uncomfortable aspect to have even in the natal chart. What this tells me is that the Moon person, in this case the guy, is feeling repressed from expressing the more childlike or creative side to his personality due to your Saturn influence, which they can interpret as being too cold or austere. The way you think (Saturn in the 3rd), is very serious most likely... and maybe your outward expression is what's making him feel like he can't express the deeper emotions (Moon) that he feels about things in the relationship, about commitment and creativity (5th house).

You are probably not conscious that you're doing this. What's possible is that he may feel he has A LOT to show you deep within but it's too much for you to process, and he could secretly resent not being able to openly show his deeper feelings. But the key issue is here, he may be just wrongly interpreting the actions of your Saturn as aloof or unable to process his feelings when that could just be an illusion. It's best to talk about this one together. Is it possible he is a little more lighthearted about the relationship than you are? Maybe you view it more seriously, and he doesn't always want to take it so seriously. Maybe that's the problem as well.

Ok, the Venus-Moon quincunx only further supports my idea that both of you may have issues opening up and expressing deeper emotions without feeling guilty or like you've said too much. This aspect means undeniably that you do love and care for each other. But it also represents that the way YOU love and nurture may not be well received by this man. Your Venus is sort of incompatible with his Moon. The way you love or express yourself in love may make him feel uncomfortable or awkward even at times... there is a good chance, according to research, that he is not being emotionally receptive due to past failed relationships. Do you feel that could be true?

I also noticed that your Sun makes a quincunx to his Mars-Neptune conjunction as well. With Sun quincunx Mars, you will have a feeling of annoyance with each other that requires constant adjustments over time. With the quincunx you might be likely to get into little 'spats' with each other that could escalate into worse fights easily. There is a high likelihood that one of you is more energetic than the other, and this can cause friction. What makes this all the more evident is that his Mars-Neptune conjunction ended up in your 5th house. Maybe the way you approach relationship issues and the way he does is very different.

I noticed the Mars-Neptune conjunction he has in your 5th house receives many stress aspects, particularly to your Saturn and Jupiter once again. I am beginning to wonder if you are maybe the more sober, serious partner in this relationship and his more childish ways can annoy you...? Even if he is a nurturing person maybe this is true. Maybe you feel more like the paternal partner. The Mars-Saturn square means mostly that Saturn is annoyed with Mars being too childish or too free in emotional expression, while Mars feels like they can never please a critical Saturn. Maybe the guy is feeling like you are limiting his emotional expression, it's a double-whammy since the Moon is in the 5th of expression.

Phew... I wrote a lot! Haha. I hope this helps for now. I tried to address ALL possible issues with the relationship with guy #1. Soon, later today, I can give you an in-depth reading on the second guy. I hope this helped! Tell me what you think of the comments I made and if any ring true for you.

posted April 16, 2012 12:01 PM            

I am currently filling my head with stelliums, north and south nodes... so much to know!

posted April 16, 2012 05:30 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by jesuis:
Wow! I've just seen your response now, sorry that I didn't see it before!

Ok, now to tell you about this mystery man number 1. He is in fact my partner. We have been in crazy emotional rollercoaster of an off and on relationship for the last 5 years of my life. So you are correct in saying he has a deep place in my heart. And I am sure that it is because of the 4th house. I, ironically, also have my sun and venus overlapping in HIS 4th house. So by that, I imagine, it is the same for him. I have also seen we have sun conjunct venus, leaving us both the feeling that we can't live without the other person - EVEN IF WE KNOW THE RELATIONSHIP IS NOT RIGHT FOR US. And as I have recently summed up this relationship, I said, 'We can't live with each other, nor without.'
As for the 3rd house, yes, we have the same views on life and tend to agree on how one should live life, that's how we get each other. But when it's something within the relationship, we (most of the time) have a hard time understanding one another.
Moon in the 5th house - we have a son together! I was pregnant within 3 months of knowing him. We share a home together, but needless to say, our domestic life is quite turbulent. As for creativity, I feel like my creativity is quite stunted by him. I have never felt so uncreative in my life. So I think maybe what he is attracted to is the motherly aspect of me, the homemaker, etc.
There is alot of grief within this relationship. It goes away and pops up again with a vengeance. So this part is complicated. Yes, I do think I am serious in my thoughts, but on the other side, I am the one who would like to be more childless and care free, and FREE to be who I am. I feel quite controlled and stunted by him, confined only by what he allows me to do. This can also be true that he resents me for not being able to show me his innermost thoughts. But this is a double edged knife. He is an extremely honest person. To an extent. His biggest secrets are ones that I have discovered, and I feel are the reason I am colder towards him. There have been huge trust issues (reguarding other women, and him having a problem sleeping with prostitutes). Now, I think his resentment comes from the fact that I have been to curious and found out his secret things, and my coldness because it's hard for me to come to terms with. (You're right, it's hard for me to process, but I imagine it would be hard for many women to deal with certain issues)
Strangely, he brings out my serious side, where as other people tend to bring out my playful childlike side.
Yes, we have big problems opening up to each other. This comes from years of fighting, and misunderstandings. It seems one of us always takes what the other person says in a wrong way, and ends up in an explosion, way out of proportion.
hmmmm.. I don't know about him not being emotionally receptive for past failed relationships. I will have to think about that and get back to you. It's also interesting that you say the way I love and nurture might make him feel uncomfortable.. I have never really gotten that..
Also, you are quite right, we often get annoyed with each other. The way he does things and I do things is quite different and we tend to grate on eath other. What I do bothers him ALOT more though, than vice versa.
hahaha I have just thought about what it could mean, me b

---

Ahh! I knew it! I actually don't remember putting that in my response, but I was thinking... man, if you two haven't had a child together yet, I'd be so surprised. I'D Moon in the 5th is a biggie for synastry, it's a heavy hitter and I think it increases the likelihood of you having a baby with that person. It makes sense that with such powerful connections you'd end up together and have a family. You both have the compatibility for children, that is very true. Unfortunately some other things are getting in the way of that general compatibility despite it being there.

As we communicate back and forth about this, I'll be able to see more about the situation. I'm really good at doing natal chart readings, but I'm still practicing for synastry. This is good for both me and you, a good learning experience, right?

In your case, it seems to be that, as you mentioned, the 4th house emphasis in your synastry how he is looking for someone who can be more nurturing, mothering or caring to him. Yet at the same time, YOU are also feeling that Saturn-Moon square because somehow, SOMEthing is blocking the creativity in this union. Your Saturn in the 3rd, your mindset and how you feel, is feeling the blockage of creativity due to the square it makes to his Moon in house 5. So yes, I'm not at all surprised to see you actually feel uncreative around him. He isn't someone who is going to bring out your playful side because of the stress aspects. This is probable to cause mutual tension.

I first figured it could be him who was feeling it, since he has the Mars-Neptune conjunction that squares your Saturn also, and that seemed to indicate maybe his was too fanciful or flighty or whatever, but then I can see what you mean about it affecting you. Your Saturn is taking the brunt of it in the 3rd. You've got to be feeling that maybe even more than your partner. Saturn, I always say in readings, is the Old Man... and when we have someone who is bringing something negative to Saturn, who is going to take it heavier in the heart, and more seriously in mind? The Saturn person.

"His biggest secrets are ones that I have discovered, and I feel are the reason I am colder towards him." That makes a lot of sense. In the union, which is the 5th house in general, he is bringing the planet Neptune. Neptune adds a sort of watery unclearness, or a fog to what it touches. It is the point of anxiety for many in the chart. In synastry Neptune in house 5 shows that he IS definitely keeping something from you, or something in general about him or the relationship is just... an enigma to you, or unsettling at least. Or maybe you've found out a lot of his secrets already, as you said, since there is that persistent square between Neptune and Saturn as well.

I think another reason you feel a loss of creativity is from the Neptune-Saturn square. That can add the feeling of being oppressed by the way your partner does things. So maybe I was wrong - maybe he is the more serious partner in the relationship at times? I mean serious in the sober sense - not enjoying a lot of fun at times. But then I see you suffer as well, since he is bringing out that ultra-serious side JUST when you are in this union... appropriately enough, it seems his planets in your 5th house which makes stress aspects to your Saturn, are bringing out the more negative, too-serious thought patterns of Saturn in the 3rd. Even in a natal chart, Saturn in the 3rd can have a tendency towards seriousness to the point of doom and gloom... LOL trust me, I have it as well. So that's not good for you. You don't need the extra work of someone triggering an already illy-placed Saturn, right?

Ah, I see. The Sun-Mars quincunx can definitely cause this annoyance. Hell, even positive Sun-Mars contacts in synastry can be annoying. I was just reading up on that today, and saw that Sun conjunct Mars in synastry can lead to the 'I can do anything you can do better' dance between partners. :S

Hmm... about the Venus-Moon quincunx. Maybe for you, this aspect means that HE isn't understanding the kind of love and attention you need. I think after reading through your response, I might be getting closer with this one. What do you think? It seems what you love, what makes you happy, he is not emotionally giving that to you.

So I see you also have the second chart which I can read... is this another person you feel you're interested in right now? Would you like me to look at it in terms of if you two have a good compatibility?

posted April 17, 2012 11:52 AM            

I can definitely work on reading the 2nd guy's chart today. We can look at why you feel this inexplicable attraction to him. I'm sure it will show up in the synastry somewhere.

Once again, you're very welcome. In such a situation it makes me feel much better to help you knowing how much it means to you.

posted April 17, 2012 01:47 PM            

This is a general reading of your compatibility with the guy who you can't stop thinking of.

In comparison to Guy #1, your sexual and romantic compatibility is off the charts! It seems to have more of a sizzle than a dull ordinary quality to it, the latter which seems to describe what's going on with the first guy. Granted although you have this spark, there could be some stormy and difficult passion along the way. Below is more info.

What strikes me right off the bat as totally different from the first synastry is the 1st House emphasis. The intriguing guy you've had your eye on is eliciting a totally different feeling within you, isn't he? It's a compelling attraction, fiery and romantic, most likely… well, we can blame Aphrodite and Apollo for that, because we have a very strong first house stellium with his Venus conjunct your ASC!

Venus in the 1st in a synastry overlay is very powerful. Either he sees you as highly desirable or you see him as highly desirable… it could probably be both. I think this rings true for you, since you said when you look at him, you just feel pulled in. Totally attracted. When you first saw him, your interest was caught immediately and you wanted to know more. That's Venus. I'm assuming he's a pretty handsome guy to you? And I wouldn't be surprised to know that he finds you very attractive as well. In fact, this sort of synastry, if you don't mind me being forward, indicates that he's the 'other man' in the relationship! Since his Venus conjuncts your ASC, when you look at him your heart will probably beat a little faster. There is just something about this guy that you WANT. Venus in the 1st indicates a physical attraction, in the sense that one partner (or both) looks upon the other and admires how beautiful they are, and they know they really want to be with them.

What strikes me as different from the 1st synastry also is how much more inspiring and creative these placements are. 1st House Venus in synastry indicates a relationship where creativity is encouraged and sparked, stimulated between partners. Maybe in this relationship you will feel way more open to express who you are.

I forewarn you though, that looks aren't everything. People born with 1st House Venus are known for their physical grace, charm and beauty. But Aphrodite can be just as cold as Hades. Look at what she did to Psyche! So keep in mind that it's important to get to the root of any guy whose Venus falls in your 1st House before you take a serious plunge and give up everything to be with them. There could be more beneath the surface you need to know. I really feel that his Venus is causing this intense, inexplicable attraction you feel to him. It is literally on top of your ASC! So be careful. Venus in Leo is a big time flirt.

In his natal chart is a strong Mars-Jupiter conjunction in Leo. This guy seems to be more fiery, passionate and forthright than the first guy. Do you feel this way? I say this because Venus in Leo, combined with Mars conjunct Jupiter in Leo is very passionate and very different from what was going on with Guy #1. Guy #2 has a Gemini sun and Capricorn Moon, yet at the same time his love and action nature are extremely hot without his head and his heart being overloaded with feeling. Maybe you prefer a guy who is more bold and forthright with his love and desire nature, but at the same time rather level-headed and intellectual. Maybe that's another reason you're seriously attracted to Guy #2: he seems to put it all out on the table. There is nothing deceptive, you feel, about his feelings or how he presents himself. You two share no mystic, unclear 5th house connections. In fact, the 5th house has zero planets in it, so I'm guessing this relationship will not end up in you two having a child together.

One thing that stands out to me in comparison to Guy #1 is that Guy #2 has a Saturn that does not disrupt and unsettle yours. His Saturn and yours as very compatible, they are connected harmoniously. Guy #2 will not appreciate a short-lived relationship with you. Two compatible Saturns in a synastry indicates that both can be serious about making it work, sometimes long-term. So I don't think you will have to worry about him suddenly departing, or having it be a short-lived union.

At the same time, the Mars-Jupiter conjunction he has is bothering me. A fiery planet empowered by an extremely fiery sign, combined with Jupiter can cause issues for you, since this conjunction makes many stress aspects to your planets from the 1st House. When someone's Jupiter lands in your 1st house and makes many stress aspects to your planets, it might indicate that they're asking of you more than you can give. His fiery, passionate action planet is at odds with your stable, earthy and sensual action planet. Mars in Leo provokes and Mars in Taurus is very stubborn but can blow up just as badly as Leo but over a longer time period. Basically, you might have a clash of egos here… and its most likely his ego that gets in the way. Although your sexual life together would be very passionate, expect unfortunately some intense arguments, ones that he is more likely to start than you. He has the more direct, explosive Mars combo, not you. And with this conjunction in your 1st House, you might be willing to take it for a long time before you throw up your hands because of how attracted you are to him. What do you think about this, any of it ring true?

Venus is also square Mars. This is a famous aspect in synastry that garners a lot of sexual tension. It can make sex great, but when the sexual aspect of the union dies down it can turn into an extremely emotional affair that drains either or both partners. Once again, you have the Earth Mars, which will be impacted from his Fire Mars. According to cafeastrology.com, in this scenario it is highly likely the person with the more volatile Venus will have a greater sexual desire and want more sexually than the Mars person can give. Or maybe for you two it is the other way around? You don't have to answer. I just assumed maybe he is more demanding of you all around due to the afflicted Mars-Jupiter conjunction combined with his fiery Venus square your receptive Mars. I'm worried your Mars is getting the brunt of too much here. And in the end you might go sour and really feel a lot of anger about how he might be treating you in the above areas.

With the stability of the union, I don't see an extraordinary amount of problems… that Saturn-Saturn contact and how his Saturn trines your Venus seems to help increase the chances that you will not cheat on one another or at the least that you'll both take it seriously. It just seems that the sex life could end up a bit stormy or be the cause of some issues here. He needs to reign in his passion a bit to make it work.

His Moon landed in your 4th house. He elicits deep emotions in you, am I right? This appears to be no superficial affair. When you are together, you are emotionally involved totally. This watery house ruled by Cancer is good for the Moon in synastry. Traditionally a woman is supposed to want to nurture and care for her husband or lover, so you will want to take care of this man from this placement. The emotional care you as a woman will give this man is cool, watery and maternal. Maybe he likes that. If he is seeking such care (maybe to cool down those fire planets!) then maybe this also increases the chance of the relationship working out. What do you think?

But what worries me is the 4th house Pluto.
I think this speaks hugely of how he could totally change - since Pluto transforms - your feelings on domestic matters… and maybe that means leaving Guy #1 and being with someone new, starting a new domesticated life with a different person. You seem to be very unhappy with Guy #1; maybe Guy #2's Pluto falling in your 4th house represents how he is shaking up your home life by being around. I'm not sure though. I can really see thought that something about this guy is going to shake up your emotional life. This is an intense and dramatic placement. I have a feeling he is going to change your home life somehow. You are already considering being with him *maybe*, right? That means a total change of home situation. He MAKES you want to consider that. There's Pluto in action. He could transform your domestic situation. This looks like the real deal hun! :')

Hmm… I also noticed his Saturn is quite close to your Descendant. What might that mean? I am guessing that it represents that something a bit unusual (it's in Aquarius) about him or the situation at hand that is unusual could be affecting the union from really taking off. OR, this could mean that since there is an age difference between you to this is slightly large, you are seen as more of the authority figure in the relationship. He respects you. Maybe it is seen as slightly unusual to have a 10 year age gap in society, but you two both don't care, or maybe in the future if you do care, you can stop caring. I don't think it's unusual at all. Because the Saturn conjunct the Descendant is positively aspected, your relationship could be strengthened because you are the older of you two in the union.

One thing that could make this union more difficult to take off is the Sun-Uranus quincunx. The important Sun planet is being thrown off by the planet of radical change, Uranus. This can change things for you two again and again. Maybe it throws you off guard. Maybe it brings unwanted intrusions or sudden surprises both good and bad. Do you find any of this could be true? If so, you'll have to ignore your egos and work to find a way around it. What I think personally could be throwing you off guard is your 4th house Uranus. Maybe at this time in your life your home circumstances or domestic situations are unusual. This could bring those unwanted surprises when he tries to get closer to you or the other way around….

A few other important things.

His Pluto opposes your Sun. This increases the inexplicable attraction factor. When he's around, you come alive… you feel like a totally new person and when he's gone, you think of him a lot. But the opposition is tough because I've read, it's like the two planets can be on opposite ends of the room shouting at one another. This means that you could feel extremely connected, but have the tendency to perhaps fight about the nature of the relationship. Remember the movie 'Fatal Attraction'? That's sort of a good way to describe this one. It would appear that it would be more likely for Guy #2 to be feeling this way - very possessive and maybe aggressive - about the union than you do. He wants to possess you! He wants to know all the little things about you. He might be very jealous that you haven't torn up your family roots already, since Pluto is in H4, and gone with him to start a new life. Do you feel any of this could be true?

That's all I have for now. I hope it has helped, and we can definitely communicate more about it!! All I can say is, I can see why this other guy has such a hold over you... the aspects and placements in synastry I have just observed are much more intense than what you have right now with Guy #1.

posted April 18, 2012 11:22 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by jesuis:
Pfewww.... I don't know what to say at the moment. Hmm, well to start off, I need to seriously delve into studying as much as I can about astrology. Second, I know I'm repeating myself, but thank god there is someone like you in the world who cares enough about helping other people, and taking the time to do that!
Ok,,, guy 1 (my partner).. I never did finish my text yesterday, and what I was saying. You are correct, he is the flighty one in the relationship, and me in the serious one. I feel like the paternal one, and have said many a times when people ask me about having a second child, that I already have 2 lol. He literally wants someone to take care of his every need, and for me we're a little too young for me to get his underwear and socks in the morning because he is too lazy. He has been flighty, he, until about a year ago, always had someone or many other women in his head. I have discovered all of his secrets, things no one knows about him, and he would never tell another woman, either. THIS has erupted many a times into completely out of hand emotional fights, where it has ended with him slapping me in the face. It seems to be his reflex with me and his father, as we're the only 2 people that evoke that response out of him. He is extremely sensitive, but for being so sensitive, I've seen him cry a grand total of 2 times.
What did you mean about him being emotionally unresponsive because of a past failed relationship? Because he blames me for a past failed relationship with another woman? Could that be it?
I also feel that I will hurt more from the loss of our relationship, maybe because of Saturn, and I know that and see that, hence my fear.
He is quite serious in his comportation towards me. He criticizes excessivily what I do and how I do it, and I become quite offended that he can't accept there is more than his way.
He also, yes, would like me to be the perfect housewife - in an old sense, where the woman does what he says, cooks, cleans, stays at home, has his children, and he is free to roam and do what he pleases.
Good to know someone else has a badly placed Saturn, lol. Not that I mind it, to be honest. I do drive myself crazy, but only when I can't find a solution or conclusion to something I'm thinking about. Work is a good outlet lol.
As for the Venus Moon quincunx, this could go in both directions. I really feel that he can't satisfy me emotionally. But all of these realizations, to be honest, didn't erupt, until 6 months ago.. whennnnnnnnnnnn hahahah.. guy 2 entered the scene and totally shook me to the roots and made me question and realize and feel that things were/are seriously wrong.

So, from what I got from your statement, you believe guy1 is a complete failure, outside of having a child together? That we really do love each other, but it has too many negative influences? Looking at our composite, our 7th house is also quite negative :-(

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No problem love. I'm just glad I can be of some help to you. I've been in your shoes before…where it's a highly personal problem nagging you and no one is around to help. It feels terrible so I had to reach out!

OK, I'm glad to see I was right about that. It really does indicate in your synastry with Guy #1 that you are much more paternal, but do not enjoy being this way… because of the stress aspects you have to your Saturn from him, you don't get any enjoyment out of being the 'boss' in the union. It's not a joy when you have to take care of two kids, one of them being them being your S.O.! Like you said, it's sort of funny but…. not. LOL

About the emotional unresponsiveness - well originally I figured what could be the case with the Moon-Venus quincunx is he feels awkward about opening up emotionally to your love and affection. Maybe because of the past failed relationships he has dealt with. Maybe those old relationships did a number on him and made him clam up emotionally in fear of being vulnerable. I really hope he doesn't blame you for any past failed relationships! I don't think that's the case with this aspect though.

Moon in Capricorn squaring off Saturn does seem to increase the chances of him being quite critical of you. Moon in Capricorn is NOT a naturally sympathetic Moon combo, having the Moon in such a sign will not make you the stuff of cotton and rainbows on the inside… haha. It just doesn't. So maybe that is why you feel the criticisms can be even worse, since he has a Capricorn Moon AND in the first degree of the sign no less. Why is this important? In astrology it is extremely significant when a planet falls in the 28-29th degree of a sign or the 0-1st degree of a sign. Since Guy #1 has the latter, this means his Capricorn nature can go out of control sometimes, and coupled with the Moon that is not a good combination. This also raises the chances of him being extremely critical or cold. Just because when a sign falls at 0-1 degrees, ALL of its energy is very unharnessed… it's wide open to be used and sometimes people fail to take control of that energy. It's like having a hyperactive kid with all the qualities of that sign and sometimes you just can't control that little kid from going nuts! :[ I failed to notice this about his Moon earlier, this is VERY important for you two. I think this is what is making the emotional aspects even worse. Also, it is a double-whammy that in his natal chart his Moon is in the 12th House. Not good… it is quite a sad and troubling Moon placement for some people.

I totally understand what you mean about how he sees you and wants you to be the 'traditional' and old-fashioned house wife who willingly takes on mundane, difficult house duties without saying a word. His Saturn, coincidentally, also lands in your 4th house, which is probably why that happened. Saturn brings difficulties usually to whatever area it touches. He wants you to take on the seriousness (which is a quality of Saturn) of the household while as you said, he has free range to goof around and do whatever he wants… not cool.

Yep, I certainly do. I') It's a weak spot in my chart, personally, since it makes me prone to depression and questioning my mental sanity. LOL… I don't actually think I'm insane, I mean I just wonder if I have depression a lot, or some mental disorder similar to that. Saturn causes me mental anxiety since it's in the house of the mind. I think I wonder if I have a disorder because quite a few people in my family do so it scares me. But then again it brings me concentration to pore over a wide variety of subjects and very intensely when I need to, and it makes me very serious about work I enjoy. Another kind of sad thing about my Saturn is that it is in retrograde, and true enough, I did not have strong authority figures growing up. I sort of had to take care of myself.

Yes, it is very possible for the Venus-Moon aspects to go either way since they are so emotional and personal.

I'm sorry if I made you feel like Guy #1 is a failure! Oh God, I feel so bad about it. 8'I I didn't mean to make you feel he's a total failure… I just honestly believe that you two are simply not as compatible in other areas that mean so much to you, outside of having a family, like emotional security and a comfort in expressing who you are. If you are not expressing who you really are in a union, then the union ITSELF is verging on failure… I'd like to think of it that way. Know what I mean? It seems like obviously Guy #1 is not doing his part here, but it just seems like the relationship itself is not working out nor is it ANY good for you to be dealing with. A negative 7th house composite is not a good sign I have to admit… were there many heavy planets there like Saturn?

posted April 18, 2012 02:04 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by jesuis:
..Now to talk of the guy I can't stop thinking about :-) Your reading made me extremely joyous, but scares me and confuses me just as much.
First question: Compared to the first guy the compatibility is off the charts, but in general compared to great charts where does it fit?
hahhaha, no, I totally don't mind you being forward. I quite enjoy honesty. Yes, the 'other man' caught my eye 2 years ago, he walked by, and I immediately was drawn to him, without knowing why. And, when, another time not long later, he saw me, he immediately came up and said he just had to introduce himself. This was 2 years ago, and I have seen him just coincidentally come into the local where I work, I was always happy to see him, nothing more. 6 months ago, I went out, and he happened to be in the same bar I was. On this particular night, we collided. And for one night he turned into the other man. What shook me from that, though, was that it felt so right, or so deep, or so something that I shouldn't have felt. I am VERY trustworthy in my relationships, and hadn't looked at another person in 5 years. He was the only one who had EVER made me turn my head.
So, that's the background info lol.
Since then, it's turned my world upside down, and caused chaos in my personal relationship. We don't have a relationship, I am not having an affair, but I see him 'randomly' because I live in a small place and work one night of the weekend in a bar. You're right about creating creativity and being able to express how I am. Not really knowing this person, just through our stupid random meetings and conversations, I feel like I can be who I am and he likes me for exactly who I am. Yes, he is a cutie as well lol. And yes, he is a big time flirt. And yes, I've thought many a times I don't really know who he is, as I have also seen contradictions, as you put it, hot, and when he's cold, he's cold.
It's definite that I am attracted to a fiery person, for some reason. You're right, I don't feel like there is anything deceptive about him, or that he would be deceive me (even if he would).
As for him not being happy with having a short lived relationship with me, he wouldn't even be happy having a friendship with me. There was conversation for months of us going for a coffee together, and us never going because he said 'I don't want to meet someone I can never have something with, one day you'll understand'. He, in fact, had left the relationship he was in. And I, on the other hand, stayed because I am so completely intertwined with my partner that I can't imagine life without him, health or not.
Yes, as well, we have already had a couple of 'clashes'. 2 started by him. The 1st time becasue I said I can't have anything with him, the 2nd because I said I couldn't even go with him and his friends to just hang out. The 3rd was by me - when I blow up I really blow up. He turned from being warm to cold and aloof. That hurt me alot, and I said what I had to say. A month passed by, I avoided him and him me. Then I saw him again, and tried to avoid him, but he confronted me. The next weekend, who shows up alone at my local? Him. Flirty and fiery with one question. What do you think about in the morning when you first wake up? Me?
Oh god this sounds like a sappy romance book they sell for $5 in the grocery store.
On that note, I can't respond to who wants more sexually. It happened once and I've been fighting with every ounce of strength I have in me to do the right thing out of respect for both men.
Good to know though that he might want more than I can give him..
Yes, right again, when we are together, it feels like home. I feel protected and safe (hence me freaking out when he turned cold) and myself. I believe he wants someone like me, as he said that even. I have also read something about where his descendant is and the ruling planet is what he looks for in a mate, and that is taurus. My sun is also in his 7th house, making me believe he thinks I am his ideal mate.
What do you mean it looks like the real deal??? Yes, he is shaking up my domestic life to the core! That's also why I freaked on him when he went cold, I was seriously contemplating how in the world it could work with a 20 year old, a 10 year difference, etc etc. BUT the thought made me happy, because just seeing him makes me happy. If this worries you, this WORRIES ME lol
Yes, 10 years is a big gap, Especially him being so young. I have read as well though about him that he would be happiest with someone who is much older or younger than him.
I don't know about sudden surprises and unwanted intrusions.. could you clarify? For me, it's the fact that I have a family, a partner, a son, a life with someone else.
As for Pluto opposing my sun.. well, yes, to an extent we are always talking about the nature of our relationship without really talking about it. If he is jealous and wants to possess me he doesn't show it, but I know he thought about it. After not seeing him for 1 month, my thoughts resided, and seeing him again just brought everything to the surface. It's this dull wanting feeling I can't shake, but makes me utterly happy just to think about. And yup, I know, without him saying it, that he feels like I am in the wrong for not leaving my boyfriend. Because he has said to me a couple of time, you can't be mad at me because I did everything right, you know you haven't.

Pfewwww... so. hahah I don't know how I feel at the moment. Like everything I felt inside of myself is true and there are concrete reasons for each relationship being what they are. So I feel better, because I can stop obsessing about finding these answers. (Is that the same for you because of Saturn in the 3rd house?)
But I still have no idea what to do. I'm quite good at blocking myself and not letting my emotions take over, and I don't want to ruin the life I have because there is also my son involved. But the thought of being able to be MYSELF and be happy and free..
I would hug you if I could see you!

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I'm glad to hear that! Right, of course with some happiness comes anxiety… that's natural.

I think your compatibility is pretty good in general. But yes, I meant to the chart you shared with Guy #1, the compatibility and chemistry was MUCH improved. But in general, you and Guy #2 share quite a few powerful synastry aspects that indicate a serious relationship. Haha like I've said, this is one of the first serious synastry readings I have done so I don't have many others to compare yours to unfortunately.

Hmm… there's Pluto-Sun in action! You were immediately drawn to him in an ordinary life situation. Even though it didn't turn into something immediately, which would probably have been indicated by some close Venus-Mars aspects or something, it DID end up turning into something more serious…eventually. That's how Pluto seems to work. It takes time but it is there, it is always lingering in the background waiting to emerge. Like a dormant volcano waiting to erupt. Your life force, who you are, is totally impacted by his Plutonian force here. Although it has lead you to have a possible new love interest who you connect with more, as you said Pluto's dark side came out through having him around causing chaos with your life circumstances. That's how I best see the Pluto-Sun opposition causing issues with you two. Especially since his Pluto is in your 4th.

"I feel like I can be who I am and he likes me for exactly who I am". That is great! That is definitely what I saw in your synastry. I'm not surprised to see his Venus Leo does make him a big flirt. But thankfully as I've said, you guys don't have a one-night-stand synastry going on where he won't take you seriously. Saturn conjunct Descendant is a very serious aspect in itself, and other things in the chart pointed to long-term love. I am also glad to see you feel he isn't hiding anything from you… that is the worst with a guy. It's better to have a guy open to sharing and expressing himself than hiding skeletons in the closet and leaving YOU to open the door and find out about them!

Hmm, not surprised. I totally saw that in your chart. Especially because of the Saturn-Descendant thing. With Saturn here, the relationship is meant to be a serious and stable one, and most likely NOT just a friendship especially since it trines your Venus. His rejection of doing simple activities or casual meetings together is definitely a mix of his Saturn placed near your Descendant, and his Pluto opposite your Sun. He really does want a place in your life, in your domestic and personal life. He wants a lot out of you. But then, here's where the squares from his planets landing in your 1st come in. His Venus and his other personal planets like Mars and Jupiter squares your Mars. He is urging you to leave your current life, rip up your roots to be with him and just make the decisions, right? Well, your Mars in Taurus is stubborn and does not want to move just yet; and you're probably feeling agitated that he's asking so much of you, to make those kinds of choices, right? That's what I thought originally. I can finally see how it's coming into play.

Aww, it's not bad like a cheap romance! I actually find your story very intriguing and very romantic but not in a sappy, cheesy way. It's intense. I found that throughout your synastry with Guy #2: intensity. Nothing superficial about it, so trust me, this is too deep to be a 5-dollar romance!

I'm not surprised to see you feel comforted and safe around him due to his Moon in your 4th. Emotional and physical detachment from him after feeling this comfort must be hard to deal with then… But like I said, it's important to see that he is REALLY, REALLY into you… and therefore feels too lonely not to have anything BUT total smoldering intensity and a stable life together before he takes the plunge. As aforementioned, this is a guy who will wait and wait for some time before he withdraws in a Scorpionic fashion because he can't have what he wants, and seeing what he can't have is too painful to bear.

Sun in the 7th is a BIG indicator of a romance between two people, and as you said, being seen as the ideal mate of the other person. This only increases your chemistry!

"I don't know about sudden surprises and unwanted intrusions.. could you clarify? For me, it's the fact that I have a family, a partner, a son, a life with someone else." Yes, I think in your case this is what is the unwanted intrusion, AT LEAST it is in his eyes… since I fee that with this aspect he is the outsider looking in. He wants to possess you and have his own life with you… but the life you already have is ruining the chances of this happening. Also, it can go both ways: you might feel that he's a GOOD kind of intrusion in your unhappy lifestyle! I didn't mean to scare you and make you feel something weird might happen, not at all. I just think for you this might mean that you two started off with difficult background circumstances and he might feel like the outsider looking in.

Pluto can be very secretive. Unless it's connected to your Venus in a union he'll probably be more secretive about wanting to possess you romantically and sexually. I think when you see him every feeling comes back to the surface again because the Moon and Pluto both ended up in the 4th house… strong emotions will come up when you two are around one another physically.

Haha, yes, Saturn in the 3rd can make you obsessive about certain problems in life, that is true. It can make you hesitate because you can over-analyze or have mental anxiety about them. But try not to let it take over. You admit that you do not let your feelings take over - well that's Saturn in the 3rd in action, in part. You sometimes need to ignore your mind and go with your heart. Of course, your son is a very, very important part of your life and it's wonderful that you are considering him first and foremost in the life situation and how it will change. (My parents never did that for me concerning their new boyfriends and girlfriends, ever. It really sucked.) But as you said, you need to do the right thing for your future, and maybe if you went with Guy #2, you could all have a beautiful future together. There is no doubt that this new guy will be faithful to you. It's in the stars! Hehe JK. But seriously, he has been thinking of you, and you of him for so long… you're obviously very important to each other and have very good compatibility.

Aw, that's sweet of you *virtual hugs!* I'm glad you're feeling a little better… but I wish I could help you resolve it fully.

posted April 19, 2012 06:53 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sweet-scorpion:
No problem love. I'm just glad I can be of some help to you. I've been in your shoes before…where it's a highly personal problem nagging you and no one is around to help. It feels terrible so I had to reach out!

OK, I'm glad to see I was right about that. It really does indicate in your synastry with Guy #1 that you are much more paternal, but do not enjoy being this way… because of the stress aspects you have to your Saturn from him, you don't get any enjoyment out of being the 'boss' in the union. It's not a joy when you have to take care of two kids, one of them being them being your S.O.! Like you said, it's sort of funny but…. not. LOL

About the emotional unresponsiveness - well originally I figured what could be the case with the Moon-Venus quincunx is he feels awkward about opening up emotionally to your love and affection. Maybe because of the past failed relationships he has dealt with. Maybe those old relationships did a number on him and made him clam up emotionally in fear of being vulnerable. I really hope he doesn't blame you for any past failed relationships! I don't think that's the case with this aspect though.

Moon in Capricorn squaring off Saturn does seem to increase the chances of him being quite critical of you. Moon in Capricorn is NOT a naturally sympathetic Moon combo, having the Moon in such a sign will not make you the stuff of cotton and rainbows on the inside… haha. It just doesn't. So maybe that is why you feel the criticisms can be even worse, since he has a Capricorn Moon AND in the first degree of the sign no less. Why is this important? In astrology it is extremely significant when a planet falls in the 28-29th degree of a sign or the 0-1st degree of a sign. Since Guy #1 has the latter, this means his Capricorn nature can go out of control sometimes, and coupled with the Moon that is not a good combination. This also raises the chances of him being extremely critical or cold. Just because when a sign falls at 0-1 degrees, ALL of its energy is very unharnessed… it's wide open to be used and sometimes people fail to take control of that energy. It's like having a hyperactive kid with all the qualities of that sign and sometimes you just can't control that little kid from going nuts! :[ I failed to notice this about his Moon earlier, this is VERY important for you two. I think this is what is making the emotional aspects even worse. Also, it is a double-whammy that in his natal chart his Moon is in the 12th House. Not good… it is quite a sad and troubling Moon placement for some people.

I totally understand what you mean about how he sees you and wants you to be the 'traditional' and old-fashioned house wife who willingly takes on mundane, difficult house duties without saying a word. His Saturn, coincidentally, also lands in your 4th house, which is probably why that happened. Saturn brings difficulties usually to whatever area it touches. He wants you to take on the seriousness (which is a quality of Saturn) of the household while as you said, he has free range to goof around and do whatever he wants… not cool.

Yep, I certainly do. I') It's a weak spot in my chart, personally, since it makes me prone to depression and questioning my mental sanity. LOL… I don't actually think I'm insane, I mean I just wonder if I have depression a lot, or some mental disorder similar to that. Saturn causes me mental anxiety since it's in the house of the mind. I think I wonder if I have a disorder because quite a few people in my family do so it scares me. But then again it brings me concentration to pore over a wide variety of subjects and very intensely when I need to, and it makes me very serious about work I enjoy. Another kind of sad thing about my Saturn is that it is in retrograde, and true enough, I did not have strong authority figures growing up. I sort of had to take care of myself.

Yes, it is very possible for the Venus-Moon aspects to go either way since they are so emotional and personal.

I'm sorry if I made you feel like Guy #1 is a failure! Oh God, I feel so bad about it. 8'I I didn't mean to make you feel he's a total failure… I just honestly believe that you two are simply not as compatible in other areas that mean so much to you, outside of having a family, like emotional security and a comfort in expressing who you are. If you are not expressing who you really are in a union, then the union ITSELF is verging on failure… I'd like to think of it that way. Know what I mean? It seems like obviously Guy #1 is not doing his part here, but it just seems like the relationship itself is not working out nor is it ANY good for you to be dealing with. A negative 7th house composite is not a good sign I have to admit… were there many heavy planets there like Saturn?

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No, don't feel bad! You didn't make me feel like it's a failure, you only pointed out exactly what is going on. And like I said, I LIKE honesty, more than anything else in the world. My friends that know both of us tell me the same thing.. he's not giving you what you need. And in my opinion, it's vice versa. I can't give him what he needs either!

Yes, in the 7th house there are the moon and uranus. 6th house jupiter, saturn and pluto. 4th house sun, mercury and venus. In the 8th neptune and the 10th mars.

posted April 19, 2012 07:13 PM            

There is one thing though.. no, he hasn't urged me to leave my boyfriend. He hasn't said a single word, he hasn't sent me a single text message, he's actually done the opposite about not forcing me to do anything.

I realize I've hurt him tons. I realized that before, but now things are alot clearer. The first time he got angry with me, he introduced me to his uncle as the woman he was going to marry. At my work. And then tried to kiss me and I said I couldn't do it. He stormed out. The second time he became angry was because I wouldn't go with him and his friends to hang out, after I accused him he just wanted to sleep with me and that's it, he said no, I just want to spend time with you. And he stormed off.
Then he became cold and distant. He came into my work, and walked right by me, pretending he didn't see me. I blew up. I told him that I couldn't believe I fell in love with an ******* and that my life was such a mess because of it Then he told me, 'what, you think I'd get together with you?' Then I stormed off. lol. And we avoided each other for a month.

And then 2 weeks ago the run in. He called me over, and said that I really hurt him. I apologized. He said maybe it was love, but better just friends. I said ok, fine. Me at this point standoffish. He said, hey, we could go drink that coffee, but that's it. I laughed. That coffee we have been talking about for 5 months now. I left and went home.

Then a week later he randomly comes into my work by himself. And asks what I think about in the morning. I replied work, and he replied so you don't think about me? I said, who knows, and then he laughed. He knows. But I couldn't help being distant.
lol. In the stars. I like that. But what worries me, is you said it showed that he was the 'other man'.. and I also read about I think it was the Sun Uranus quincunx, that this points to extra marital affairs...
It's a really difficult situation. I don't want my son to suffer. It's not right what your parents did to you and I'm sure you suffered alot as well. What's also not right is that my son has seen alot of fights between us though as well. But the thing is, I live on the other side of the world. My family is far away, my best friends. My partner's family has become my family. I live in a place I'm also not happy living in. My partner is extremely intelligent and vindictive. I know his deepest darkest spaces, and trust me, he's not someone to reckon with. Can you imagine if I left him for a 20 year old? I don't think this 20 year old is even ready for something like this! He can't solve my problems, only I can. But I'm afraid that in the end, I will only have more problems, and lose / hurt my son. And to boot, be completely alone.

posted April 21, 2012 01:56 PM            

Ah, I see. So maybe because his Pluto is in your 4H, he is being more covert and behind the scenes about it, like he wouldn't openly urge you to leave? Maybe he's just sending you hints with his behavior. It seems because his personal planets including Venus are squaring off your Mars, some of his more... brazen behaviors could be a way of forcing you to act. Like how you said he's being a player? That's his Venus squaring off your Mars in such a scenario, I'd think. He's trying to get you to act by being obnoxiously flirtatious to the point of you questioning his ability to remain faithful. The biggest challenge to face I think is: can he reign in the Leo a little bit? Although it'll be challenging, he can't act like an obnoxious Leo as a means of getting you to do something, like being with him in the relationship. He's taking the wrong approach when with you, a Taurus Mars. Taurus Mars won't be urged to act based on these Leonian behaviors: they'll grimace and stand their ground, refusing to move and feeling turned off by the brazen Leo behaviors. Do you see any truth in this for you two? I think for him, the lion in him needs to be chained in a little, if he wants to win your heart.

Honestly though, I think with any Leo person, a very Leo-ish person will act obnoxiously and very emotionally at times as a means of getting your attention. And that's what he seems to be doing. I know a Leo Moon in my family who will be that way to me when I am acting like a Virgo Moon and withholding emotion from them: they'll giggle, tease me, poke me (!), joke at me when I'm not laughing, throw things at me and laugh when I get annoyed, make weird funny noises, and they're FIFTY YEARS OLD. LOL. So as you can see, a Leo never really grows up. I') Haha, just kidding. Moon in Leo can act like a big kid sometimes, but the point is, when they're emotionally insecure that side of them comes out. So it seems with Guy #2, he's romantically insecure about the whole situation with you and his more negative Venus Leo traits are coming out. For Leo, that's their way often of alleviating tension or solving the problem. It seems like in this case, your new love interest is trying to rile you up by being a big Leo-esque flirt. He's using that against you, maybe to make you jealous even! Leos are often all about jealousy factors in the relationship... they love teasing and making their partner jealous, I've read. Except the issue is, that's not going work easily with a Taurus type like you. What do you think? Maybe I'm wrong, but maybe not.

I can definitely see the bratty Leo coming out with him ignoring you too. Don't worry - that's their way. They will do things like that to you, and it's infuriating. The Leo Moon person I was talking about earlier? They'll dramatically ignore me and breeze on by like they're in a lifetime movie or something (LOL I just get that vibe from them, they'll even have a painfully melodramatic face on) when I say after an argument with them, 'So you're never going to talk to me again?' And they purposefully ignore me, even refusing to say a simple no. They do the same thing! And for earthy types like you and me, it's not so easy to get into the dramatic mode that Leos oft operate on with relationships, especially with fighting and emotional withholding. Guy #2 might be acting this way because you haven't gotten together yet. It's almost like Leo-dominant people will act like the scorned, Byronic hero when they don't get what they want and expect the earthy types to come crying to them and keep them from walking away by clinging to their legs. 8'D But the truth of the matter is, they just... do that without really MEANING to hurt feelings. They aren't trying to push you away, they're trying to pull you in with these tactics. But the problem is like I said, more earthy types won't play into the dramatics, they'll just be like, OK I'm not dealing with this ******** , see-yah. And then the Leo is like, WAIT! Don't leave me, I actually did that because I love you. So, yeah. It's very muddling and emotionally confusing when you're dealing with a Leo-dominant person and you're quite earthy. You don't get their emotional nature at times... that's what *seems* to be going on with you and Guy #2. And it's definitely not the lack of attraction, it's more the confusion about what he wants. Do you agree? It makes sense that eventually because you refused to give in, he gave in first and admitted how much his feelings are hurt... that proves me theory a bit.

I agree, that this is a lot to take on. It's very difficult to deal with. I actually have never been in such a situation like what you have, only with my parents have I ever been torn. But thank you so much for offering to listen! No one has ever done that for me when I've given a reading, it is very sweet of you. <3 I was torn because of my parents and what happened with their new partners. Like my mother refused to take into account my hurt feelings over her weird new husband and left me with my grandparents because I refused to live with him. And I was right - I have a very well developed intuition, and he ended up unbeknownst to my mother being a real freak, a real strange guy who ended up committing suicide and leaving her alone. I never felt bad for her about him, because she ruined my life with what she did with this new guy. But I think in the case of you and your son and Guy #2, you won't do as much damage. If Guy #2 is normal, and not carrying baggage like strange habits and drug addiction (that was my stepdad, nice huh), and if he is ready for such a comittiment then I see no issue with it. I think what is missing between you two right now is a solid, logical conversation JUST about what could possibly go wrong if you decided to take the plunge and be with him. Discuss your fears openly if you're ready. See what happens. I feel you NEED to tell him these fears about your partner... Leo dominant guys can be surprisingly protective about these kinds of things, trust me, he's not going to turn you away about it. You should open your heart to him and express this if you have not already. Say the truth - that's why you haven't gotten together with him yet. Your partner seems to be a cold and more vindictive person and that's scary for you and especially your son. Just talk about it with him, IF you are ready to. I don't know what you two have talked about yet, so I hope I am not imposing.

I think what's worrying you is the security issue. You care even more about it for your son. Maybe if you and Guy #2 talk about this more, you will be able to find closure about it. I think it's certainly possible to do if you haven't already. I'm sure he'll understand, that's what's been holding you back. I think it could be more hurtful to him for you to say outright, 'Well you're basically just a kid, how can I count on you?' If I were you, I'd say, 'I want you to feel like you can still have fun in your young life... 20s are a big time to explore the world and get to know yourself better. So if you really want to do this with me, there is no backing out like 6 months later to go 'find yourself' like your friends, which is very unfair'. Or something along those lines!

LOL I hope I don't seem like a nosy agony aunt giving bad love advice! X'D I just really want this to work out for you. Because I feel if you two can work something out for the security issues, you could do well together. But you seem to have good intuition, so it's your call. What do you feel about it right now, and about what I just said?

posted April 22, 2012 08:46 AM            

I have been reading the story unfolding and the interpretations of the charts by Sweet Scorpion and felt as if I am there and can feel your frustration and anxiety. The way your heart and mind are torn between those two men ...I do unfortunately so well know how you feel.
Therefore I do sincerely wish you to find the right path in your heart and have the power to follow it!

Dear SweetScorpion, I do not want at all to troll in Jesuis topic so do PLS take a quick look into the one I made for you:
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum11/HTML/003240.html

posted April 22, 2012 03:53 PM            

I feel quite connected to you as well, to be honest you're a big support for me right now, I feel quite alone, and your words are giving me strength at this time.

I am quite confused, however. I saw him Friday night, and immediately we collided. We left the bar together.. and so there was also the chance to understand the situation a little better. I asked him if he thought about me in the morning, and his response was yes, but not everyday. He also told me he was seeing another girl, and that she made him so nervous by being the way she was (rich, beautiful and over talkative) that he told her to leave and that there wasn't anything between them, not even a friendship. He asked me why girls always fall in love with him, and I told him it's because he pretends a little too much and they think that they'll have more with him. Somewhere during the meeting, he said to me, 'You know we can't be any more than this'. I didn't answer him. He later asked me if I am in love with him.. and I said maybe a little bit.

He was in love with me, at the beginning 6 months ago. I know this much to be true. And now I think he's done what I did, pushed the possibility, and the feelings, far away. But yet we collide every time we see each other. I do question his ability to remain faithful based on our conversation Friday night.. he just seemed so young all of a sudden, a 20 year old sowing his wild oats. And that makes me feel like that's exactly the right thing for him to be doing, and I would somehow take the beauty of being 20 and free away from him. And you are right, him trying to make me jealous does turn me off and make me grimace. By now though, in my opinion, he should know how I feel about him, but then, today I called him because he'd hurt his shoulder that night.. and he asked me why I care, and I told him because I'm not heartless. I don't think he's trying to win me over, or maybe you're right, I just don't realize it because of his behaviour.

I'm okay with big kids :-) I hope when I'm 50 I still act young :-) The problem with him acting like a flirt though, is me being a Taurus, I am quite jealous as well! My partner now is also a big flirt, and I hate it, but somehow have managed to learn to deal with it. But not completely lol. To be honest it was strange him coming out with this story of the girl he was seeing or had something with. It was like he was complaining because girls fall in love with him when he doesn't want anything serious. And the way I felt was like without him realizing it, he was telling me this story because he was saying she didn't have any substance, as rich and beautiful as she was. Compared to me was what my intuition told me.

Yep, it's definitely NOT the lack of attraction, lol. But it is confusing. He'd come into my work on Friday for 2 seconds with friends, like you said, walked in, said hello, and walked out without saying a word. Now, if I do this to him. oh boy!! He hates being ignored, that's when he really does start chasing after me hahha. But this time I just took it with a grain of salt, and when I finished work and ran into him, it was different, to say the least! :-) There is confusion, because I think he's convinced himself now that we can never be together. 10 years age difference is quite large. It's taken me 6 months to get to the point where it's starting to not really matter to me, what matters more is how I feel. And that, when I see him, is happy.

Nope, as far as I know there aren't any strange habits, and definitely no drug addiction, although he's 20 and drinks alot, the same as I was when I was 20 ;-) I get the feeling though there is something in his family. Something to do with his mother. But I don't know what. And I don't think he's ready for committment, from our conversation Friday. A solid logical conversation would be great. But to be honest I am extremely scared to tell him how I feel. I don't know how he would react if I said to him that I would love to be with him. 4 months ago that's what he wanted. But now it seems different. But that's what I told him 4 months ago, that I love my son, and I care about my partner, and things are difficult. He knows I have a lot of problems, and I think that maybe that also might be too heavy for him to deal with. YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT IMPOSING!!!! Feel free to say anything and everything you want!! Please! :-) He made a joke about hitting me on Friday night, and I almost burst into tears and said that wasn't funny, seeing that my partner has hit me on more than one occassion. His response was that's your **** to deal with, and I would never ever lay a hand on you. He hates to hear about my partner, it's by now forbidded for me to talk about him. He doesn't want to hear about it, and he doesn't want to be in the middle of it.

Hahahaha, you're being a great aunt! I definitely don't feel like you're being nosey or agony to me! It's a relief to be able to talk about it, to have some support, and it gives me confidence to believe that I deserve to be happy. And from the beginning you didn't believe in my partner, and maybe you're giving me the pushes that I need. I just am so afraid. His family is my family, he is my family, and literally without them I'll be missing a big chunk in my heart as well. I feel like I am going to hurt everyone for my own selfish needs.

How do I feel? I feel like I could be extremely happy with this guy. But also that he isn't a simple person either, and could be quite complicated, but that we would be good FOR each other, like we would support each other and also be each other's safe place of nurture and love. I feel like he's got a lot going on inside of him, like he pretends he's this super confident guy, but got deep things inside of him that he doesn't let anybody touch.

I guess I'll have to see where this is all going. Maybe things are working their way up to having a serious conversation or actually thinking on both sides that life is better with each other than without each other. Things with my partner at the moment are stable but without any actual relationship. He is away at the moment and wrote me a text saying we don't have sex and we don't even talk to each other, that it's going to end in a friendship like this. And another text, that he feels it's not right that I can't be myself when he's here, and it's only when he's gone I can be.

Pfewwww. I believe though, at the end of the day, that there is some force taking care of me, and that things are going to work out how they are supposed to. :-)