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Author
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Topic: today is the day, my friends
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missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 01:12 AM
  
When you cry in the backseat of the car
Without even making the slightest hint of a sound...
I'm not saying this for pity at all my loves, I know I am strong and this will only make me stronger... But these lessons are hard and they hurt and sometimes you just need to let it out
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ILovePoems
Knowflake Posts: 4217
From:
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 07:37 AM
Is everything okay? I saw your other post and just wondering.IP: Logged |
dustib
Knowflake Posts: 1555
From: USA
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 01:20 PM
Something to think about and might make you feel better....if his feelings with this JLo person then why doesn't have have the full name on his phone? Makes me think he may be seeing or talking to a few different people and in order to not get in trouble, he's putting them in like that. Which to me means no feelings. Now I know it sucks thinking of him with others...trust me, I know!, it's easier knowing there are no feelings. I shuffled and pulled asking how he felt about JLo and got the child card which means he thinks of her in a small way and she's not important. Keep your chin up! Maybe he is nice and kind because he knows the other way didn't work and he's grown up a bit! IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 02:33 PM
Thanks so much my friends, it literally made me cry seeing how supportive you are to be there for me! Thank you so so much.
Part of me knows that he's not really capable of developing a relationship deeper than ours, because he is still so hurt and hasn't done any healing, so how could he have something deeper? I don't even think he is capable, right now, of opening up to that level.
It's so interesting how I'm given only little bursts of info and then I'm left to deal with the emotions that brings out in me! I see how I am so ruffled by thinking of him with another women.. It may not even be true, but thinking of the reaction it brought out shows me I still have a lot of healing to do! I can't even tell what he thinks of me, but he's been very nice. He heard me snuffling my nose and asked if I wanted him to go to CVS for me? (Last trips he treated me awfully, so even a gesture like this feels huge). He also offered to watch our daughter to let me have a nap.. These things don't feel huge but they are huge in comparison to before! IP: Logged |
dustib
Knowflake Posts: 1555
From: USA
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 02:55 PM
Sounds like those little things are huge things based on the past with him. I'm always told to look for the things someone does and not what they aren't doing. IP: Logged |
ILovePoems
Knowflake Posts: 4217
From:
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 03:07 PM
Thats good thats hes being nice! Thats like a first step. Hopefully he will continue doing that. We all hear for you Miss!IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 03:41 PM
Thank you guys so much...
I have no idea what any of this means as of now, I think it will take a few good meditations. My insecuritIes paint a story and my hopes paint another IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 22, 2016 07:32 PM
So I asked him "who is Jlo"And he said "it's just some girl I know" I asked, "are you in love with her?" And he said "no I'm only in love with our daughter" So I have no idea if that's true or what but yea IP: Logged |
neptunicity
Knowflake Posts: 850
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted April 24, 2016 01:25 AM
It feels like reading a page from a love novel!  There is drama and suspense! I'm so glad that things are turning out good and he isn't interested in J.Lo. She probably has a big booty, hence the code name J. Lo. As long as there are no feelings and interest then the future seems bright! I see a happy ending!
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missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 01:50 AM
hehe, since you are enjoying the saga I will addSo yesterday I asked, "so do you have a girlfriend?" he said, "no, look, this is just what is working for me in my life right now. if she were to ever give me a hard time about anything I would tell her never to contact me again. If she was my girlfriend, I would fit my life around HER, but she just fits in right now to the spare moments in my life" then he said "it's not deep" then he went on to say that his only true love was my daughter and that he may very well never be with anyone ever again the thing is, his and my relationship may have been messed up at times, but it was certainly deep. one of those things where we wanted to get married and have babies week 2. lol. We were in jail together week 3. Made it through deaths, miscarriages, jail, probation, all sorts of craziness... I really don't know how things will work out, but I will keep the saga updated lol... He does still pay for my food and stuff whenever we go out. And he sometimes calls me by my nickname that only he calls me. IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 01:56 AM
overall, this trip was really difficult! I am taken aback by how much I was affected by this. I have done SO much work since last trip, and don't get me wrong, things were a LOT better, but i still have so much healing to do!IP: Logged |
neptunicity
Knowflake Posts: 850
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted April 24, 2016 04:57 AM
Wow, I see progress! I think when he said that he will very well never be with anyone again, that is a hint that his heart is already closed to anyone new! Because if a guy wants to give the message that they aren't interested, they will say that they are dating someone new. So I think he is still testing the waters first and maybe he is waiting for some similar verbal hints of interest from your side! Try to do the same next time and see how he reacts! You guys must have some Sun-Pluto or Moon-Pluto contacts in synastry or composite for your bond to be that intense! I'll look forward to see how this saga will unfold! IP: Logged |
dustib
Knowflake Posts: 1555
From: USA
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 08:55 AM
I agree with neptune....I think he is still interested as well but maybe right now he knows he can't be what you need. There is definitely progress though and I would look at it that way. IP: Logged |
Orange
Knowflake Posts: 4395
From: Georgia
Registered: May 2009
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posted April 24, 2016 09:47 AM
it's definitely an interesting story, MissB
I can feel your pain too. So much love there..btw, I posted a feedback for your short reading you did for me yesterday in my Questions thread, on page 2.
You were very accurate! IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 11:58 AM
oh my friends, I just love you guys so very much! thanks for the support!!I meditated last night and am actually feeling a LOT better about things. I went on this trip on the tail end of a sickness, where I had stopped my meditations for a few days... so I don't think my mindset was totally clear.. but after last night I see a lot more clearly... The fact of the matter is that he was being nice to me, there was a noticeable difference in how he was offering to help me and do things for me. When I was sniffling in the back of the car he said "do you want me to run into CVS for you?" He wouldn't let me take an Uber, he took work off so that he could drive me home. Also, he demanded that he pay for both me and my daughter's things while we were up there- even though he doesn't have very much money. I think my expectations were different because in the past he always tried to "hook up with me". But to be honest, I think I was testing him in the past to see if he would by being more open to it. This time, it would have been a big leap for him to have done that based off of my body language and clothing.. I think he was playing a bit of games with me, not really too much, but a little bit trying to make me jealous... Because I was not centered and grounded, I was being played by the games essentially.... It worked! It did make me jealous and sad. But, after my meditation, I can see through his intentions a bit more and see that he was TRYING to make me jealous, really because he wanted my approval. IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 12:27 PM
quote:
Originally posted by neptunicity:
Wow, I see progress! I think when he said that he will very well never be with anyone again, that is a hint that his heart is already closed to anyone new! Because if a guy wants to give the message that they aren't interested, they will say that they are dating someone new. So I think he is still testing the waters first and maybe he is waiting for some similar verbal hints of interest from your side! Try to do the same next time and see how he reacts! You guys must have some Sun-Pluto or Moon-Pluto contacts in synastry or composite for your bond to be that intense! I'll look forward to see how this saga will unfold!
I will just leave our pluto aspects here LOL Pluto conjunction Pluto orb -4°53'
Pluto square Saturn orb +1°02'
Pluto sextile Uranus orb +1°08'
Pluto sextile Neptune orb +1°00'
Pluto trine Venus orb -3°48'
Pluto trine Moon orb -5°54' Pluto conjunction Pluto orb +4°53'
Pluto sextile Moon orb -1°20'
Pluto sesqui-quadrate Venus orb -0°52'
Pluto square Ascendant orb +5°39' IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 12:31 PM
Also his mars falls in my 8th house and my venus in moon are in his 8th house.IP: Logged |
ILovePoems
Knowflake Posts: 4217
From:
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 12:36 PM
I wonder what will happen next. o: Please keep us updated.Also did my reading make a bit of sense? IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 01:00 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ILovePoems:
I wonder what will happen next. o: Please keep us updated.Also did my reading make a bit of sense?
Yes it did! The cards, to me, showed that a mutual energy of each of us holding on to a bit from the past, but at the same time hiding it and not showing it.. I think the devil part shows how we DID show it, with trying to subtly make each other jealous IP: Logged |
ILovePoems
Knowflake Posts: 4217
From:
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 01:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by missblyss:
Yes it did! The cards, to me, showed that a mutual energy of each of us holding on to a bit from the past, but at the same time hiding it and not showing it.. I think the devil part shows how we DID show it, with trying to subtly make each other jealous
The devil? o: I use lenormand lol IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 01:04 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ILovePoems:
The devil? o: I use lenormand lol
oops! lol, i am thinking of the wrong reading! what cards did you pull again/ where can I look at it? I am not sure i saw it IP: Logged |
ILovePoems
Knowflake Posts: 4217
From:
Registered: Feb 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 01:08 PM
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum11/HTML/019399.html Here IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 02:44 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ILovePoems:
http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum11/HTML/019399.html Here
yeah it did for the most part. it was a good time, but my emotions got in the way somewhat IP: Logged |
neptunicity
Knowflake Posts: 850
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted April 24, 2016 09:22 PM
quote:
Originally posted by missblyss:
I will just leave our pluto aspects here LOLPluto conjunction Pluto orb -4°53'
Pluto square Saturn orb +1°02'
Pluto sextile Uranus orb +1°08'
Pluto sextile Neptune orb +1°00'
Pluto trine Venus orb -3°48'
Pluto trine Moon orb -5°54' Is that composite or synastry? From my experience, Pluto aspecting Venus and moon can be intense, whether the aspect is positive or negative!
Pluto conjunction Pluto orb +4°53'
Pluto sextile Moon orb -1°20'
Pluto sesqui-quadrate Venus orb -0°52'
Pluto square Ascendant orb +5°39'
IP: Logged |
missblyss
Knowflake Posts: 1113
From: neverneverland
Registered: Oct 2015
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posted April 24, 2016 11:43 PM
that is synastry!IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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