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Author Topic:   creepy
WychOfAvalon
Knowflake

Posts: 547
From: Los Angeles
Registered: Feb 2003

posted March 12, 2003 01:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WychOfAvalon     Edit/Delete Message
I was in a hospital of some kind and in one of those patient gowns. I was given something in a needle and my face was going numb. I was wandering the hallways but knew I wasn't supposed to be. Everything was going numb and it was becoming difficult to walk.

I was led into this little room I was familiar with and laid on a table. These three men came in the room. I could see everything buy by this point I couldn't move. They were speaking German but I understood them. They were pretty entertained by the idea I could see and hear but not do anything at all.

They pulled out these scalpels and pens. They drew on my body but I don't know what it was. The sliced down the center of my chest and it bled but I think that was just to scare me psychologically. Then they all raped me and I couldn't do a thing about it.

When they were done I was walking in the snow barefoot with a lion. I was still wearing the hospital gowns but they were tattered and black.

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but you visit my sweetest dreams and you kindle all of my phantasies and you're right, it's your name that i scream ..don't you feel it, don't you hear me baby..

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Randall
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Posts: 16464
From: Columbus, GA USA
Registered: Nov 2000

posted March 13, 2003 01:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message

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"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark

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Randall
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From: Columbus, GA USA
Registered: Nov 2000

posted March 15, 2003 06:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message
Lots of symbols in this one. Wish I could help.

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"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark

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WychOfAvalon
Knowflake

Posts: 547
From: Los Angeles
Registered: Feb 2003

posted March 15, 2003 12:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WychOfAvalon     Edit/Delete Message

thank you, Randall

Yeah I'm still thinking about this one days later, too, because it was very vivid and life-like.

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but you visit my sweetest dreams and you kindle all of my phantasies and you're right, it's your name that i scream ..don't you feel it, don't you hear me baby..

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Ra
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posted March 17, 2003 02:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message
Rather disturbing Amber.

You had a similar dream some time ago - hospital/men doctors/needle/injection/paralysis - remember?

This seems to have everything to do with emotional withdrawal and feelings of helplessness. The question is, what is the true source of it?

Are you Okay?

Working on this one ...

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WychOfAvalon
Knowflake

Posts: 547
From: Los Angeles
Registered: Feb 2003

posted March 18, 2003 12:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for WychOfAvalon     Edit/Delete Message
yes I remember the other doctor dream.... it was disturbing although not quite as bad as this one.

Am I okay? I think I am. I am as confused and weird as always Maybe I've been a little more peaceful than usual lately. Just living very quietly and not going out... I've been in hermit mode. And then I didn't have dreams for a couple months that I could remember and now there are lots of them again!

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but you visit my sweetest dreams and you kindle all of my phantasies and you're right, it's your name that i scream ..don't you feel it, don't you hear me baby..

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Ra
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Posts: 2641
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posted March 20, 2003 02:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message
I am getting mixed impressions about this dream. Do you think it is possible that the hospital/needle/doctors/abuse scene is some sort of past-life fragment? Or do you feel it is mostly symbolic?

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WychOfAvalon
Knowflake

Posts: 547
From: Los Angeles
Registered: Feb 2003

posted March 20, 2003 02:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WychOfAvalon     Edit/Delete Message

I just don't know anymore. I'm so lost. It was very vivid, though, too vivid. The parts of me that weren't numb felt everything... in a way that horrified my dream self.

but then the lion would have to be symbolic, wouldn't it?

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but you visit my sweetest dreams and you kindle all of my phantasies and you're right, it's your name that i scream ..don't you feel it, don't you hear me baby..

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Ra
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posted March 21, 2003 04:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message
One thing that strikes me particularly is the way this dream first reads like a story or an experience and then ends in total symbolism. Although there is much that can be read as symbolic in the hospital scene, there is a realistic feeling to it, especially as compared to "walking in the snow barefoot with a lion." The energies of these two scenes feel different.

Looking at this dream from a purely symbolic point of view could go something like this: something about you needs healing (hospital). You may be avoiding emotional energies or responsibility (numbing injection) which results in an uncertainty of direction (wandering hallways) with increasing lack of self confidence or personal energy (difficult to walk). This situation leads you back into some pattern, something lying hidden within your psyche (familiar little room/three men). You are aware of your actions (see and hear) but are unable to take action (immobile). Perhaps there is some advantage taken of you, or perhaps there is the opening of an old wound (sliced down chest) that causes fear and a loss of your personal energy (bleeding), leading to further pain/advantge taking (rape). By the "books", rape is either a representation of an actual rape or a signal of repressed childhood sexual abuse. I hope neither of these is the case, of course. Then it seems that when this crisis is finished, a transformation is made, one in which you are newly empowered (lion) and somehow purified (snow) through the experience. Or it could be that masculine forces (lion) have frozen or forced the emotion (snow) of the experience (tattered gown) into the unconscious (black).

Does any of this strike a chord?

I do have other thoughts which involve past-life experience, and do away with the symbolism, except for the lion/snow part.

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WychOfAvalon
Knowflake

Posts: 547
From: Los Angeles
Registered: Feb 2003

posted March 21, 2003 07:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WychOfAvalon     Edit/Delete Message

hrmmm... well I was sexually abused as a child but it certainly wasn't repressed and I've had good closure with that several years ago.

The rest of it is a great interpretation... hrmmm.. I guess I should think on it. I don't think I've been too miserable lately but if it's in my subconscious how would I know? heh!

I'd love to hear you past life thoughts if you're up for it

*hugs*

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I like to watch you in your sleep ..I’d give a million if I knew your name ..And all I need is to be with you ..In a state of dreams ..That’s where I wanted to be ..With you in a state of dreams

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Randall
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From: Columbus, GA USA
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posted March 22, 2003 09:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message
Good job, Ra.

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"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark

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Ra
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posted March 23, 2003 07:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message
Thanks Randall!

Amber, I am always up for it, I just have to find or make the time for it!

Okay, the other scenario, which is what first occured to me, involves this past-life in which you were the victim of some sort of ritual abuse. I would usually prefer the symbolic approach, but there are elements in your description that are classic in cases of ritual abuse. In fact, the whole of the first part of this dream reads in very much the same way as many descriptions of ritualistic, "satanic", abuse cases.

There is the immobilization by drugging in which one is still consciously aware, which is followed by various methods of envoking fear in the victim, to "scare you psychologically". One method involves the drawing upon the body of various symbols and the letting of blood. Rape is then commonly reported as the final act, for both male and female victims.

The last scene of this dream, not doubt symbolic, makes me think of something karmic, something sacrificial, something which you have carried forward into this life which could be a source of great power. It feels like that through the experience of this past-life, some sort of purity has been gained, some sort of grounding and freedom, something through which strength and power can manifest for the greater good of those for whom you have incarnated this time to assist.

And I feel like this could be the same nazi/WWII lifetime you so often dream about.

These are mostly just perceptions and could be totally off, coloured by my own thoughts.

What do you think?

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WychOfAvalon
Knowflake

Posts: 547
From: Los Angeles
Registered: Feb 2003

posted March 25, 2003 03:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WychOfAvalon     Edit/Delete Message
thank you, Ra...

*huge massive hugs*


Thank you for taking time out when I know you must be very very busy... and TIRED! Are you getting any sleep? I didn't sleep more than 3 hours at a time for the first 6 months Hunter was with me!

I think your second explanation of the dream seems to talk to me more than the first although both do make really good sense. mostly because it was just so vivid in some areas and very life like... and that stuck with me for days and days after I had it.

thank you thank you thank you

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I like to watch you in your sleep ..I’d give a million if I knew your name ..And all I need is to be with you ..In a state of dreams ..That’s where I wanted to be ..With you in a state of dreams

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Ra
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Posts: 2641
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Registered: Apr 2001

posted March 26, 2003 03:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message
You are welcome! I get some sleep.

The dream you posted on the 11th seems to have been a prelude to this one, but totally symbolic. I am getting to that one. Sense can be made of dreams from many different perspectives but that does not necessarily mean the interpretation is correct. It is the "ah, ha!" or the recognition factor that is most important, usually.



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WychOfAvalon
Knowflake

Posts: 547
From: Los Angeles
Registered: Feb 2003

posted March 26, 2003 06:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WychOfAvalon     Edit/Delete Message
The dream you posted on the 11th seems to have been a prelude to this one

really?? That's funny, I probably would not have seen that at all! I'm going to reread it and see if I can see what you mean.

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Ra
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Registered: Apr 2001

posted March 27, 2003 02:21 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message
There are certain distinct similarities:
-Cat as a prelude to Lion
-drunk/numb
-evil stuff/evil? men
-Rammstein-"Feuer frei"/speaking German
-fire/transformation

There may be more, I am still trying to get to it.

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WakeUpMaggie
Knowflake

Posts: 38
From: America the Beautiful
Registered: Jan 2003

posted April 04, 2003 12:41 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for WakeUpMaggie     Edit/Delete Message
Ra,

I was glancing through this thread and something you said really jumped out at me:

"By the "books", rape is either a representation of an actual rape or a signal of repressed childhood sexual abuse."

Up until nearly a year ago, I was having a recurrent dream in which I was raped. The dream always started the same. It was sexual, but pleasurable, and very very real. I could almost feel a person/presence in my bedroom. Then this presence would all of a sudden turn evil and violent, and whatever sexual feelings I was experiencing became feelings of extreme terror and fear...feelings so vivid and lifelike it ALWAYS made me wake up. The presence of this "person" was so strong, I couldn't fight it. Sometimes the dream was so powerful, I could actually have it twice in one night! Very scary. I remember once it was so real, the presence, that I thought someone had broken into my apartment! It was like I was hearing and feeling something that wasn't even there...

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Ra
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Posts: 2641
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Registered: Apr 2001

posted April 04, 2003 01:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message
This could be connected with the doll dream you posted. I just wrote a response there, and then read this. Do you think?

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WakeUpMaggie
Knowflake

Posts: 38
From: America the Beautiful
Registered: Jan 2003

posted April 04, 2003 03:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for WakeUpMaggie     Edit/Delete Message
Ra,

Thanks for your replies. Yes, I did read your other message and yes, I think that the two dreams could be related. I will wait to hear more from you...

BTW, that smiley face icon with the eyes bulging out is just hilarious!

Maggie

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