posted December 25, 2003 12:48 AM         

These "conversations" are a bit disconcerting, actually. No, I have not done this before with anyone's dream, at least not to this extent. Like I said before, I am used to getting short phrases and words from this "source" ... sometimes when interpreting dreams, but usually in the context of some sort of prediction (so far 100% accurate). But these moments are never called for, I mean, I never ask for a prediction or answer, I am simply "told" ... and they are usually about relatively unimportant issues.

Anyway, it is disconcerting because I do not have a chance to filter the information through my analytical processes, so the "information" is based on nothing more than what I "hear" ... so I suppose the discomfort is to my ego, or deflation of it due to possible erroneous data. And these "experiments" with your last few dreams are resulting in more information than I had thought possible. Some of these "conversations" feel like they would go on and on if I would allow them. I have only posted the most relevant of it (due to time limitations) so I still have much to say.

I have written responses to a couple of your e-mails, too! I just have not had the opportunity to e-mail you back! ... I will!

FishKitten ~~ the last e-mail I got from you was blank, just like the one before, and I twice responded. Did you get my return mail? Or are you ignoring me.

posted December 25, 2003 08:50 PM         

I can't wait to see what else You and 'You' have to say about this! Well, I can wait but I am looking forward to it.

posted December 29, 2003 12:00 AM         

It is the possibility that it might at some point be incorrect that bothers me. So far, this source has proved always to be correct ... my wife often asks me if what I say is what I hear from the "voice", or is it merely my own opinion, because she is convinced of the accuracy as well. But, so far, the "voice" tells me things which will soon be verifiable such as "within three weeks such and such will happen", or "in three to nine months", or "in three days". But when it comes to past lives there can be no such verification, or at least not so easily. And I have never received this much information before from the "voice".

I am not sure what to think. Perhaps thinking is something I should do less of in this instance! Out with the books?!!?!!? I suppose, for now ...

posted January 05, 2004 03:11 PM         

He was yelling about it to himself as he stood on the sidewalk by the street, staring at the little house with its windows shuttered up and some of the paint peeling. The little boy went to the door near some bushes to get a closer look. It was then the shutters opened and there were four or more people in the windows pointing guns at the Brit. Words were exchanged but I don't know what because it was like I was seeing it from the boy's point of view for a few seconds.

The people in the house opened fire and his father fell to the ground pretty quickly and was obviously dead. They didn't know there was a little boy near the bushes so they closed the shutters again and just left the Brit's body where it was.

This is when I actually enter the dream, I guess because I heard the commotion and I knew there was some sort of trouble about and I wanted to check it out. I found the little boy in the bushes and he looked just terrified to hell. I kept speaking to him in German but he was just staring at me with huge eyes. Finally I was saying "Sprechen Sie Deutsch? Sprechen Sie Deutsch??" and then in English "Do you speak German?"

He shook his head when I spoke English so I said "Oh my god you speak English?" and he nodded so I said "Well you are coming with me then. They can't find you here."

So I took the little boy to my apartment which was essentially a big barren room. There was a dresser and some blankets. It was clean but that was it. I had a couple small suit cases (actually small duffle bags) with my clothes in them. I told him it was better to only have a few posessions so that way when they came after me I didn't have to carry a lot and nothing was ever left behind for them to find. I told him the dresser wasn't even mine but it was good to have some furniture in an apartment sometimes in case they came knocking on your door and caught you there. Then I could actually pretend I lived there and wasn't just living there temporarily.

I gave the boy some food and told him not to worry. He was hungry and was eating what I gave him when it became more dreamlike. Outside I could see planes but they were giant brown eagles. Eagles the size of planes. Some of them had bullseyes on the bottom of their wings and they were fighting with the non-marked eagles in the air. It was just like an airplane fight in the air although they were eagles. I could hear their guns and when they's crash they'd explode and some would blow up in the air. They were fighting and flying over the city and some of them were looking for something.

posted January 06, 2004 04:51 AM         

I take that back! ... something told me to look back farther, and there it was ... I was kind of hoping I had not typed it yet.

So, now the question is, could this small aspect of the dream (English in Germany) have occured because of an impression made by my comments? Or is this possibly a bit of confirmation? Or is it just co-incidence?

I am looking forward to getting back to this dream series of yours!

posted January 12, 2004 03:17 PM         

Here is one example of what I mean by too much detail ... "From the Alpine country to Nourembourg was the destination of that flight, which indeed found necessity for emergency landing due to mechanical overheating, or a failure of the mechanics for the lubrication of vital engine motivations."

See what I mean? Where did THAT come from? How can I be sure this information is accurate? Or can I? I must say that I am finding myself in some very new territory, so self-doubt is running rampant.

I will keep you posted!

posted January 14, 2004 12:50 AM         

Helena and Ethan? hrmmm... can't say they ring any bells but I've always had name amnesia. AWFUL with names. HORRIBLE, really. I don't know if I was in that life but in this life I certainly am! In fact, I have a bit of a problem with faces in this life, too. I can meet someone several times and LIKE them quite a bit and then meet them again and not remember their name or face. Very odd. If I am walking down the street I'll rarely see someone I know because I don't SEE people. They really have to get in my face and stop me and sometimes that's confusing if I'm not expecting to see them. I'll remember whole conversations but not who I had them with.

I don't know why I just typed all that out but there's a reason for everything so I'll leave it

Anyway, thank you so much for everything!! If you are ready to share again please do and if I have any related dreams I will share it, too.

posted January 14, 2004 05:08 AM         

About your "problem" ... my first thought is that, even though you may not remember or recognize, there is no doubt that the information is there, in your mind, somewhere. The subconscious records everything, including those things that we are not consciously aware of. The question is, why would this recognition information be resting closer to the subconscious level, or at least just below the consciously aware level? What is the cause, the reason? Or is there one?

Perhaps you are just ADD and need some of that medication that helps you focus. Of course, just kidding.

I will get back to this as soon as I can. I would first like to see what results from re-writing.

posted January 14, 2004 07:27 PM         

FOr instance I'll remember what shoes someone is wearing when I meet them but won't remember their face! When we meet again if they are wearing the same shoes I'll know who they are but if they aren't then they are out of luck!

At a concert recently a girl came up to me. Now I've talked to this girl several times at several different shows and I talk to her online quite a bit. I actually like her and everything. At the show, I had no idea who she was because her hair looked like a friend's hair in England and I knew my British friend wasn't supposed to be at the show. So I was just confused when she was hugging me because I kept thinking she wasn't supposed to be there!

And, well, you know how much I love Duran Duran. I have ten zillion pics of them and have met them countless times. There have been times Nick has walked right by me and I didn't know who he was because he had his hair different or was wearing something different or - worse - was wearing a HAT.

posted April 27, 2004 02:24 PM         

Hopefully we can get some more guidance from your own subconscious, through more dreams, pointing the way.

posted April 29, 2004 05:00 AM         

Okay, here is the complete description of the very first dream, including the segments I have already posted.

"the little girl (the one that was telling) is Amber, and in that incarnation, at that point in her life, she received a shock to her very core that has not yet been completely healed, manifesting as a karmic influence, an energy pattern, in this life. That experience was to begin a series of experiences, in that life, which are now only beginning to emerge from within her unconscious. The impression made was deep, and although Amber made progress in that life through service to her fellow man, because of this excruciatingly painful experience, an aspect of herself was split, remaining now as an undeveloped, incomplete portion of herself, as symbolized by the little girl. The "little girl", or that aspect of self as represented and the energies contained therein, remains confined within an experiential energy field in time-space.

"Amber did not manage to hide her little brother. He was taken, and so was she. Her punishment was to witness the brutal killing of her brother. Her conscious mind could not tolerate this experience and created a more symbolic, and thus less painful "memory" ... to the stars indeed he went. This experience constituted her first split.

"The experience set the course of her life to one of service, sacrifice, and compassion. At certain times she assisted in covert operations that smuggled the innocent into safety. Main contacts were British and American operated intelligences. Interestingly though, it is found that there were also periods of service to her native country and government. We find that there were certain influences within the sphere of her government which took advantage of the split in her personality, even fascilitating this separation of self. The experiments were only partially successful, however, resulting in a complex tangle of conscious awareness and physical activity. The final scene of the dream is a re-creation of part of the method used to induce the desired state of consciousness in the experiments.

The pendant - "A momento of her brother worn in that experience, though the appearance in the dream is more symbolic. The tear-drop shape is found to symbolize the sadness, the emotion, connected with her brother. But this is inverted so as to symbolize the inversion of her emotion and this experience with her brother, an inversion of pain and sadness to service ... more to the point, her pain was 'turned' into a precious gift (especially to others)."

"Another facet to this pendant symbolism is related to the throat chakra. In the present life, it is found in this energy center residual vibrations from this past-life. As the opening and clearing of this center progresses, more of the creative forces will be released on a more conscious level. It is through this center, due to this past-life and others, that much of Amber's creativity presently manifests, albeit from an unconscious level. ...(pause)... Does not every great artist hold some insufferable pain in his or her soul?"

posted April 29, 2004 02:56 PM         

"From the Alpine country to Nourembourg was the destination of that flight, which indeed found necessity for emergency landing due to mechanical overheating, or a failure of the mechanics for the lubrication of vital engine motivations. We find Amber, then Helena (?), in the shelter of the airfield with others of the flight.

Some combination of atmosphere and conversation, as well as stress, inadvertently activates a subconscious trigger which links Amber's acting personality with one existing on the other side of the split or fracture (psychological). The two personalities cannot co-exist. The darkness of supressed emotion, symbolized by the black woman, awakens momentarily and replays the horrific experiences which set her course in those times. As the opposing forces within self activate, the resulting internal confliction turned to physical shock, she becoming catatonic for a time. She had to be carried back to the plane."

This is the second part of the dreams for December 19 ...

"In this dream we find [Fishkitten] with the correct perspective. The new house is this body, this life, and the landlord is the Oversoul. Symbolized here is the activity in the current life of exploring, discovering, and cleansing energies from the past, from past-lives. Four symbolizes the foundation, the bedrooms symbolize the unconscious, and the bathrooms cleansing. So, we find here symbolized the cleansing of those unconscious foundations affecting her in the present.

"Amber's sense of the 'strong' ghost is literal and correct. He was one of the doctors, and with him she had much contact. Much of the conflict of that life is epitomized by him ... this the reason he appears in the dream ... an energy to be cleansed, a 'ghost' from the past.

"The book is triple in meaning, the translating triple in meaning. An actual book, or rather more of a note-book, was possessed and held tight by Amber in that life. Contained within were personal momentos, journal entries, codes, and other information crucial to her functioning in those times. It also symbolizes knowledge, and this knowledge is power, the power of Self. In the context of the present, it (the book) is the unconscious, it is the untapped potential, the answers to her questions, it is her dreams. A translator indeed! And this is the reason, the cause of concern, the anger, of the ghost/doctor/Nazi. Within secrecy he was then shrouded with always the threat of revealment like a cloud surrounding him - paranoia. There came a time when Amber embodied this threat. And now, this energy threatens to be revealed agian, as a portion of experience held by the unconscious self. This energy is difficult, and it fights to remain hidden.

"The man in the bathroom represents the conscious self, logic, thinking, rationale. The conscious self is "controlled" by the unconscious, the past "controls" the present, there is a division. Without the division the unconscious, and in this case the past experience, has no power to control the conscious, they become one. The wrists are cut, the arms are cut, the hands are cut ... an attempt at maintaining division, at keeping separate, keeping Amber from embracing, from handling the energy/experience, from cleansing it (bathroom).

"The 'ghost' does not want Amber to have the 'book', but the book is being opened."

Weird stuff, huh?

posted April 30, 2004 04:13 AM         

I see that I never answered your question, Amber -- you wrote:

she provided a degree of comfort on a personal level as well Do you know what this means?

My impression was that you were able to speak with them at times, and you would console them, tell them about what was going on with the war, news from home, etc. It meant much to them to be able to speak with someone from the "outside", and being a woman was a special bonus.

posted April 30, 2004 02:27 PM         

You are so fabulous for writing all of that down for me!!