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Author
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Topic: love and sex in dreams
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mercury05
Knowflake Posts: 15
From: Sydney, Australia
Registered: Jan 2005
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posted August 16, 2005 09:44 AM
 
Hey all, Over the past few weeks ive been having the same dream every night only involving a different person. Im currently in a stable relationship with this guy whom i love with all my heart but for some reason i dream of being in love with a different man everynight.
All these different guys are my boyfriends friends that im friends with as well, only when i have a dream about one of these friends, we make love together and i wake up feeling in love with that same guy. The feeling wears off eventually but i still think its odd. Its like im being unfaithful in my dreams. What is going on? Neek** IP: Logged |
Ra
Moderator Posts: 297
From:
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted August 17, 2005 04:22 AM
Hello Neek  How long have you been with your boyfriend? Have you had many other relationships? How do you feel in the dreams? Do you feel like you're being unfaithful while you are dreaming?  IP: Logged |
mercury05
Knowflake Posts: 15
From: Sydney, Australia
Registered: Jan 2005
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posted August 18, 2005 06:13 AM
Well I've been with my current bf for about 6 months now, but we have been through alot together in this time and become very very close. I love him with all my heart alas i dream of his friends and myself together and no it doesnt feel like im being unfailthful in the dream or even when i wake up...this is only my 2nd serious relationship,( im actually very fussy when it comes to relationships) and i love him dearly, which is why i just dont understand it ant all... thanks
neek** IP: Logged |
sue g
Knowflake Posts: 2090
From: ireland
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted August 19, 2005 02:59 AM
I often have sexual dreams, but of late they involve me making love with my husband..........for Gods sake you'd think I would dream about other men wouldnt ya LOL!!!Mercury, Are you happy with your sex life with your partner, or do you feel you would like to try experimenting with others - maybe its just a sub-conscious message that is coming thro in your dream. Even tho I really love my man, in the past I have dreamed that Ive been in bed with others, and I think it is normal, especially in a long term relationship. Love
Sue xx
IP: Logged |
Ra
Moderator Posts: 297
From:
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted August 19, 2005 04:04 AM
Completely normal. If there were no feelings of wrong-doing or of guilt while dreaming, then I don't really see a major issue. Perhaps it is just your subconscious exploring it's boundaries ... nothing wrong with that. Or it could be serving as a vent for releasing certain energies. What do you feel, Mercury? IP: Logged |
sue g
Knowflake Posts: 2090
From: ireland
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted August 20, 2005 09:32 AM
Now Ra, how do I get the guy (in my dream) I am in bed with to turn into Johnny Depp...........my husband is gorgeous, but you know how fickle we woman can be?Any suggestions? xx IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Moderator Posts: 1418
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted August 20, 2005 01:48 PM
Hey Sue, I think had the same think."I got yer golden ticket right here baby." IP: Logged |
sue g
Knowflake Posts: 2090
From: ireland
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted August 20, 2005 03:42 PM
Isnt it great pix that as soon as we see the word sex in a thread we immediately go check it out.........f****** perverts that we are LOL !!!Hey and hands off Johnny, he is mine!!!! xxx IP: Logged |
spellbound
Knowflake Posts: 19
From: Illinois
Registered: Aug 2005
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posted August 22, 2005 03:39 PM
I often have sexual dreams involving other men and have come to find that these men have "qualities" that I am attracted to or desires within myself that I need to focus on. Sexual dreams do not necessarily mean that you wish to cheat on your boyfriend. It is just a means to discovering your hidden sensuality or qualities that you need to project in your waking time. IP: Logged |
Ra
Moderator Posts: 297
From:
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted August 23, 2005 03:48 AM
Welcome to LindaLand, spellbound You are so very right. IP: Logged |
mercury05
Knowflake Posts: 15
From: Sydney, Australia
Registered: Jan 2005
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posted August 27, 2005 02:50 AM
Thanks all, After reading your msg i had a talk with my boy and we have decided that it would be ok with either of us experimenting with some other ppl but we do have rules. Example is that both of us have to be comfortable with the person either of us will be with, there are other rules too. We realised how much we trust eachother and love eachother when having this talk and by coming to this conclusion we both had a chance to express our sexual feelings. So alot of good came from these dreams i was having and thanks for all your advice otherwise i never wouldve had the nerve to bring it up with him Thanks again, take care
**Neek IP: Logged |
pixelpixie
Moderator Posts: 1418
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted August 27, 2005 05:47 AM
I just want to say uh-oh.I appreciate the many different kinds of relationships and sharing and love.. but it did pop in my head when I read your post, enough for me to go......
Hmmmmmm...
Because in essense, it sounds like the ideal.. and awesome to talk about. But it has been *ahem* my experience that especially when you do love someone, quite often, after the act with another, unbidden feelings come into play. Because of that love.. even with permission, that other one can pop into your mind at the most unopportuine times. *cough* and really take you out of the experience of love, and it sort of takes away tiny bits.
Just a small word of caution I know you are not me and he is not he and that is the truth. But sometimes Universal feelings such as guilt and jealousy and love need to be explored safely.
So I just wanted to say, is all.
That said... if it's something you feel you can handle, make sure your eyes are open and you are safe. Make sure also, that the 'sharing' goes two ways.
If you aren't in a position to settle just yet, go have fun.
Seriously.
Go.
Have.
Fun.
Then when/if you are married you'll maybe feel settled with it.
Maybe. IP: Logged |
geminstone
Knowflake Posts: 407
From: Golden, CO
Registered: Nov 2004
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posted August 27, 2005 03:10 PM
To each his/her own and, more power to you, Mercury05. I agree with PixelPixie and the word of warning she has given. I know a couple, having decided in one nights hours, to do this very same thing... it has ended their marriage. I understand that you are not but months into your relationship but, the termination of their marriage was really very small compared to what wounds have been inflicted, both on these people, in each other and, moreso, themselves. An honest, internal review ... maybe even a few.... could, possibly, be very reveiling. Just be sure, should you both move forward with this decision, that you are both on the same page... Be careful, Be well... All the best to you both...  ~ geminstone IP: Logged |
sue g
Knowflake Posts: 2090
From: ireland
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted August 28, 2005 02:53 PM
Oh I agree with pixie, this happened to me with my first marriage - he ended up running off with her (she was my best friend).........I was not exactly guiltless as Id met someone else....even so it was a kind of messy situation.Please be careful, have fun, but most of all I would be aware of the consequences xxx IP: Logged |
Ra
Moderator Posts: 297
From:
Registered: Jun 2005
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posted August 30, 2005 03:42 AM
I thought the same thing ... uh-oh. I don't know, Mercury, sounds like a pretty shakey path to walk. IP: Logged |
cathy1111100xxx
Knowflake Posts: 43
From: australia
Registered: Jul 2005
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posted September 02, 2005 03:02 AM
Mercury05It may be the mother in me but I will advise ( and I know you should never advise people)Don't do this!!
It is one thing to start a relationship with no commitment and have other partners. It is another thing to be monogamous and then go back to less commitment. This very rarely works (though I do know that it sometimes does but I really wonder if these people really love and respect one another) I too have seen relationships absolutely disintegrate after events like this, I think the people involved did not really think it through. Jealosy, betrayal and pain are not necessarily easy to predict. Let us know how things go God Bless Cathy IP: Logged |
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