posted December 09, 2015 08:19 PM            

Try to connect with Ascended Masters and Archangels, even the mermaid kingdom (I saw your other dream). Maybe even fairies and elementals. They will help you rise above this mass consciousness.

posted December 09, 2015 09:04 PM            

I did think your interpretation was quite interesting.I am not really sure what my mind thinks is the true workings of this universe.Although I am open to new opinions and ideas.I am trying to better myself and I have ideas about how I would like start.At the moment I'm starting small like things chanting mantras to deities like Kali,Durga,Shiva,Ganesha,Shakti,Varuna and few others.I have some interst in Egyptian and Greek Deities as well.I probably don't worship properly but I do like chanting the mantras.I may not being able to prove that they are working but I know I would like to continue using them.

Unfortunately I still haven't been focused on meditation.I want to do it but usually I don't get very far.

There Is probably a lot of things I would like to discuss with you.Thank you for offering to help.

I will be back on tomorrow at some point.I would stay and chat a bit more it's just that's late here in Ireland and I need to get up in the morning.I would love to stay and chat since I don't feel tired but if I did I'd regret it in the morning.I just noticed your reply and wanted to answer before I went to bed.

Goodnight Athenegoddess

posted December 10, 2015 11:53 PM            

Here is another viewpoint ...

To me, this dream suggests that mentally/intellectually you are highly capable (top floors/learning procedures) but emotionally there is some issue which can short-circuit your ability (convulsions).

Could it have to do with pressure to perform? Someone's expectation for perfection, that you have since rebelled against? A man that is a monster? Whatever it is, it is likely rooted in some difficult past experience.

How do you feel about this?

posted December 11, 2015 11:37 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Panthera Leo:
Thank you Geminikarat

---

I wish you all the best with your connection!

posted December 11, 2015 11:48 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ra:

---

I just want to say Hi! I am glad.

posted December 11, 2015 01:34 PM            

I would agree that somtimes my emotions do effect my ability to preform.At the moment it may be hard to pinpoint a specific problem because at the moment it would seem like there is a few different issues niggling me at once.
I would also say at times I am a little bit neurotic.I actually do like to like work alone I hate lots of eyes watching me.I may be very capable of doing the job but I hate people buzzing around me like little bees watching everything I do.

In the past there probably have been a few people a may have rebelled against.I do like to do a good job but sometimes I can choose to refuse to cooperate if others are to crictical or demanding.I hate when people make lots of drama over small unimportant things.

If I think back im sure of a few negative men as well as some difficult women.I think the past really has stuck with me even if I have tried to forget it.

posted December 11, 2015 09:06 PM            

I have to say I like your interpretation and I must admit you seem to have similar thoughts to me when I first had the dream.To be honest I don't really know why I was taking the blood and it could have been for a bad reason just as much as it could have been for a good reason.Whatever the reason it was for I am sure I would have taken the blood if I hadn't had the fit.I can certainly understand why you thought of vampires.The dream does have a lot vampiric undertones to it.It is possible I could have been a vampire or perhaps some sort of mad scientist dabbling with something I shouldn't be dabblimg with.I have no problem helping others if I wish to.I don't like feeling like I am being controlled or caged.Sometimes I actually may enjoy helping others and would do so willingly.I sometimes hate if others just demand it.I may have helped willingly if they had just asked nicely but I hate that they sometimes assume that I am obliged to always help them when they just bark an order at me.

I don't feel like I delibrately try to drain others the majority of the time.I don't like to drain others if they haven't done anything to deserve it nor do I get pleasure out of it.
Unfortunaterly sometimes my lower nature may get the better of me and I may be prapered to use vampiric methods to get revenge or defend myself.I am aware that is wrong and I am as bad those who hurt me.I am trying to work on that issue.Sometimes after holding back for so long with all the negativity boiling underthe surface the beast within me just can't be hold held back any longer. I end up feeling like a vampire I want to go straight for my enemies throats.It's like mindless animalistic rage.Sometimes I really can be a good person but the thing is I also be an inhuman monster if I slip up.
I am not really sure how I feel right now it's like I'm in Limbo it isn't heaven and it isn't hell.Last night I felt didn't know what was wrong with me I just felt as if I had so much energy pulsing through me yet I felt so frustrated and numb and I felt I wanted live fast and die young and let whatever happens happen.The thing is even if I lived the wildest most exciting life I probably wouldn't be satisfied.The irony of that just makes me just want freak out.

posted December 27, 2015 04:58 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Panthera Leo:
I could see a red sky and it looked like the sun was setting.There was an older woman beside me who was instructing me on how to prepare syringes and other medical equipment.She seemed to have a very efficent manner about her.I think we were waiting the arrival of a male patient.

---

In real life, do you have an elderly female relative who might be trying to teach you something or help you learn something before she passes on (sunset)?

posted December 30, 2015 07:13 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Panthera Leo:
Thank you Geeky

I had never really thought about the dream like that.

---

That is why we're here.

Sorry to hear about the loss in your family.

posted January 16, 2016 07:39 PM            

I had done some posts there around Thanksgiving and for around the Christmas week for people who were very sad at this time of year. So many losses .... sorrows.

That's probably why you responded so kindly to me about missing my Scorpio Grandmother. (I always miss her around Thanksgiving here, and the Christmas Holidays.

Consoling Hugs and many condolences to you... Oh, what a really hard time to have to lose a Loved one like that.

posted January 16, 2016 11:26 PM            

You did help soothe me a bit Mirage29 with the music.The the song by Karen Carpenter was so fiiting.It was so unbelievable that you posted that song especially without knowing about my grandmother.I know that you were think about your own Scorpio Grandmother but it is a strange coincidence that we were both thinking about our Scorpio Grandmothers at the same time.When I listened to it the lyrics really made me think of her.I am feeling better now.To be honest I think I started grieving a little bit before she died.She wasn't herself because had dementia and the cancer was taking it's toll on her.I knew it was coming so I guess I thats why I didn't feel like someone I loved had been taken from me.I did feel a emotional but I tried to think of it as a blessing because she wasn't suffering anymore and was in a better place.I am sure there will be times when I think back and I will miss her though even though time passes by.I feel little strange though at the moment I feel sorta stronger and more positive even though there are still flareups of negativity within me.I thought I would miss her more because we used to be really close but I think her death may have hit some other relatives harder.Maybe I didn't feel it quite so much because I am sort of used to being lonely or familar with the feeling of being left behind.perhaps I just know that I have to just keep moving forward enough make my life better regardless of who is or isn't in it anymore.Although I do believe she is still in my life ecause I believe the spirit lives on after death.

posted January 18, 2016 01:11 AM            

I'm so sorry. Please forgive me.

Reading over your dream(above) now makes more sense. Red sky, and looking like the sun was setting (death was imminent, a part of you knew she was going, and the time was getting closer. You were preparing for an eventuality).

You dropped into the convulsion, then the scene with the zombie.... There are some things in life we can control, and others we cannot-- like people getting sick, getting dementia, having cancer, and dying.

It's all a matter of time. Death is a part of Life. Our sickness and troubles are part of the alive-walk yet zombie-corpsing world we live in. Sometimes it can seem as though we walk as half-and-half: part of us living, with part of us also in the process of dying, as the natural part of life takes its course.

It's hard when we want to take care of someone we love, and we fall down short and helpless... There is nothing we can do. There was nothing we did wrong there. Some things we have no control over. All we can do is 'be present'....

Panthera, you were blessed to be around her in her final weeks-- even if she didn't really 'know' you (her dementia?). Her spirit knew you were among those who had cared for her. That counts a great deal, to your credit.

Story....
I was invited to go see my grandmother before she died. I had a new husband, a two-month old baby. We had a small economy car without air-conditioning. My husband didn't want to take the 8-hr road trip. (I had a low thyroid condition where I was almost ready to go into shock and didn't know it yet, so I wasn't feeling the best.)...

So I made an excuse and said we weren't going to go visit. That was my last communication. She was dying and hadn't told anyone except my cousin and aunt who lived next-door to her. She collapsed turning jaundiced end of June that year. The doctor wanted her in the hospital.

On her way out of the house (for what was to be the last time), she told my aunt to wait a moment. She took out the skeleton key to unlock the old wood and glass door, went in, took her prayer book OUT of her purse and set it in front of my picture on her dresser. I was the only grandchild who's picture she kept on that dresser. ... In her final moments in her house, she had thought about ME.

Before the week was over, she was dead-- July 4th at 2:00am. The woman sharing her hospital room said the atmosphere in the room was very very nice and peaceful when she let go her ghost.

.... ..... I still feel really sad that she never got to hold her first great-grandchild in her arms.

I did make the trip (with my baby) to go to her funeral. There were many many people and relatives there. The church was full!

Panthera... that was 1984. I still miss her terribly. I think she was the only person in my life whom I ever felt truly unconditionally-accepted me, just as I was. No one else ever made me feel that way.

Her birthday is Nov 20th. ...She spoke fondly of Karen Carpenter, and she would tell me that every time she heard Karen sing, she'd think of me (timbre of her singing voice, and her general coloring is similar to me).

I was in my city one Christmas time. It was late at night, I was at the bus terminal waiting. There had been a light rain that had wet everything, and holiday lights everywhere looked mirrored and enhanced as they reflected off the wet/icy-ness.

Then one of the buses flashed its bright gold-orange number, "20" before me and I had a 'sense' come over me. Like it was my grandmother 'being' with me in the warmest way. The experience must have lasted half an hour. This Karen Carpenter song started playing through my head... and it was like we were embracing each other's spirit and saying this to one another--

(music) Merry Christmas Darling (Karen Carpenter) [3:35] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lV5ENWOQ6d8

Here is the story of a "lucid" dream I had of her. It was the third of 3 special dreams of her, all close together. Then after this dream, she never visited me again. http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum15/HTML/003119.html

It is good that you are able to let go of your Grandmother, Panthera Leo. Layers of sadness or sorrows may float up from time to time. ... That's normal. Let yourself process this. Holding back tears too much, and you'll wind up like me. I was soooo busy in my life. Always busy busy busy.

Take time to Mourn those people you lost during the time you lost them. Don't be too busy. And don't hold on to them... Release, set them Free, and let YOU be Free.

posted January 18, 2016 01:07 PM            

I do agree that seems that we do walk through life half of us living and half of us dying.The universe is a complex and has a wonderful duality to it.

I do feel a little bit guilty because I wasn't exactly there with her near the end.It was my mother and grandfather and some others who where there near the end.
I was still in her life but I was at a distance even though I was close.It's hard to explain. Alot of the time other family members were arguing and I didn't want to cause more trouble or get in the way.I missed opportunities to be close to her because I was so distracted by my own life.I have Aspergers and sometimes I shut off from the world.Sometiimes I also wonder if at times there is something more or if i'm little unstable.I have been trying to change my life and had been caught trying to make the changes and improvements happen.I have been feeling really trapped,sad and angry about my life and things that have happened and the fact I am at times bordering on being a recluse without an education who doesn't have much to show for the 25 years of my life.At the moment I am dependant on my mother but I really am trying to change it all, get educated,get a job,live by myself.I got distrcted and missed spending time with my grandmother.Part of me knows there are things I don't need to feel guilty about but I do realise I did miss some quality time with her.Part of the reason I also stayed away was because I didn't want to add my drama to situation.I also felt isolated from certain family members who probably assume I didn't care at all or think I am useless or that I am a selfeless waste of air.

I am air an void so I find it hard to get the words out or express things properly although my Moon is in the 11th,Mars in the 7th and Retrograde and Intercepted Saturn,Uranus and Neptune in Capricorn in the 3rd.I really do need to communicate.I have an unaspected Leo Mercury which doesn't help and when I do say something people just look at me like I have just killed somebody.

I could have been with her the morning it happend but I couldn't sleep that.I had went up to bed around 5.30am finally trying to get to sleep.I think my mother got a phone call around 6.30am telling her that my grandmother was dying.I was going to get out of bed but I just didn't.I assume my mother thought I was asleep and didn't go into to tell me.So she went to the hospital.I feel bad.I do feel bad but I also feel like during the night I felt like something was going to happen.I wasn't exactly thinking about my grandmother but I was thinking about changes,about life,about death,about winter,about fate.It was wintertime and I am sure it was a windy rainy night.I didn't exactly feel happy or sad it was like I was going through all sorts of feelings they all mixed togther.I don't think I am pyschic or anything but in a strange way I do feel I was picking up some sort of vibes or sort of energy.My mind was racing and I just couldn't get myself together in order to get up and go to the hospital.

I can't imagine how it felt for you when you lost your grandmother because I am not you.
I hope I don't upset you by saying this but in a way I feel like I think I know where you coming from.Perhaps it's because we both missed opportunities and because bad circumstances worked against us.

The story about was beautiful.I love momments where you feel like you are been given signs,answers and love.

I would love to see her in a dream.I would love to see her in all heavenly glory in a dream that feels like I am surrounded by love and light of the universe.I know that she knows this.I think the reason I haven't had one like this is because she and the universe know that I am going to be ok and that I have enough faith and strength to get through it.I may not have have splendid visions but I know the that part of the universe exists even without seeing it.