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Author Topic:   Every 35 minutes, a man in the US commits suicide as a result of divorce
venusdeindia
unregistered
posted January 21, 2009 03:41 AM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
http://my.opera.com/khankrumthebulgar/blog/show.dml/77931


quote:

S is for Suicide

This blog entry is based on one composed for MIsForMalevolent on Thursday, August 18, 2005, but which needed revisiting due to the criticality of the subject matter. I have revised the original post quite a bit to make the points clearer, and added a lot of emphasis and even some math. Don't be scared. Just adding, subtracting, and multiplying. ...Take deep breaths... You'll be fine.

If you are moderately familiar with the topic at hand...

...which is the treatment of men by our society...

- you probably have wondered how men can survive the crushing depression that they must feel while struggling with a strongly biased legal system that is eager to enslave them.

Well, many men don’t survive it.

Suicide rates for men and boys are already much higher than those for women and girls – with 75% of all suicides being committed by men - over 22,000 men per year. (The rate is 80% in Canada, perhaps reflecting their system, which is often even more abusive of men. )

And suicide rates for divorced men are even higher than that - divorced and separated men are TWICE AS LIKELY to commit suicide as other men, per the study "Marital Status and Suicide in the National Longitudinal Mortality Study" by Augustine J. Kposowa, Ph.D., at the University of California at Riverside. CBS News covered the report in some detail here.

The study showed that being single versus being married made no difference in suicide rates.
- Simply 'being married' does not provide singificant mental health benefits relating to suicide.

Even more tellingly, for women marital status, married, single, separated or divorced, made NO STATISTICAL DIFFERENCE in suicide rates.


- So somehow, divorce affects men in a much more significant way than women. One wonders what that way could be...

Previous to this study, increased rates of suicide for men had been explained away by claiming that significant mental and physical health benefits were to be had from married life, and by 'congitive differences' between men and women - women purportedly spending more time 'processing' their problems and thinking more 'inclusively' than men, Well Dr. Kposowa's research has exposed that canard, (wait, let me speak plainly that misandrous, shovenist tripe for what it is.

Let's take a moment and really reveiw those numbers, which we will extrapolate using the published rough perecentages in the CBS news article:



Total Suicides: 30,000 per year
Men's Suicides: 22,500 per year
Women's Suicides: 7,500 per year
Divorced/Separated Men's Suicides: 14,850 per year.


Hmm. I wonder how many men committed suicide outside of a divorce/separation.
...Well, I know how to subtract, lets see...


Non Divorced/Separated Men's Suicides: 7,650 per year.
Wait... that's approximately equal to the number of suicides for women.


So it seems reasonable to guess, that if it were not for the way men are treated in divorce, those 14,850 men PER YEAR would still be alive.

One can only wonder what value the approximately 148,000 men killed by divorce over the last decade would have added to our country if they had not been driven to suicide by our country's misandry.

Imagine the hundreds and hundreds of thousands of children growing up over the last decade without fathers, brothers, sisters and parents bereft of their son or brother. Men who died for the crime of getting married to the wrong person.

The total loss is mind-numbing.

Dr. Kposowa's study; the first study that cared enough about men to look at the details of why men kill themselves; shows us that if you hear about a man committing sucide the odds are better than 2:1 that he is either a divorcee or going through a divorce.

Suicide is a dramatic and extreme way out of a very bad situation. -A way out that few would choose.

The significant increase (2:1) in suicides following a divorce for men is very significant.


These men are the canaries in the coal-mine of our family court system. They are literally dying to tell us something, and apparently that something is about... Divorce.

SO NOW COMES THE BIG QUESTION:

What is so terrible about divorce that men would kill themselves to escape it?

The answer is simple: Slavery. To quote Adrian Banks' article on suicide and divorce:

So what is the main cause of [divorced male] suicide? […] The answer to this question is not that difficult, but before someone can accept the truth of the main causes of suicide, one must first accept the truth that slavery is just as much an institution today as it has been throughout history. The more oppressive and cruel the enslavement, the more suicides there will be among the enslaved classes of society. Why do you think that, in pre civil war times, slaves were kept in the holes of ships and not allowed on the decks? Simple, it kept the slave trader's precious cargo of labor from jumping into the ocean. As Winston Churchill stated during World War II, "it is better to perish that to live as slaves." […] In a divorce situation today, there need not be any legitimate grounds thanks to no fault divorce. A man can be a hard working fellow who supports his family and loves his children, but if his wife decides to divorce him, there is nothing he can do.

Kposowa cites "financial obligations," in explaining the preponderance of divorcees amongst male suicides noting that "The courts in the United States are in a position now whereby money is given to the woman, or the man is forced to pay alimony, child support. The man is also asked, in some [perhaps most] cases, to vacate the house."

Kposowa also notes: "If a man loses custody of the children and the woman keeps those children, there are situations whereby she may not allow the man to see the children, and that causes some depression." -No kidding.

Suicidal divorced men are merely slaves leaping from the decks
– consider the facts:


Most marriages end in divorce – over 60% by my numbers.

66% of these are initiated by the wife and few of them for abuse or any real fault. -No-fault divorces are initiated by women three times as often as by men.


The courts award physical custody to the man about 3% of the time – the odds are 40 to 1 against the man winning physical custody.
Truly shared custody is so rare that the courts don’t even know how to calculate support for it – their spreadsheets don’t support it. They have to fill out one for the father as primary, and one for the mother, and then average the two. - I believe that loss of access to one’s children and alienation are key factors in male suicide.


Women commonly interfere with the visitation rights of the ex husband. 75% of men complain of this behavior, and 40% of women admit it.

If one assumes complaints are lower than the actual number of abuses, the numbers must be staggering.

Add the loss of the vast majority of the marital assets and the house, and everything that the man has worked for, financial contributions being where men are expected to excel, and what they are supposed to judge themselves by, and you have taken away a lot of the reasons that men have to live.
Add alimony and child support, all while not being allowed to co-parent your own children.
Add to all this the fact that the state’s machinery grinds very finely – loss of a job, ‘underemployment’, and bankruptcy are good enough reasons to lose almost any debt, but not alimony and child support, no, these continue unabated, plus penalties and legal fees.


And if our poor man is unlucky enough to lose his job, or become ‘underemployed’, then the legal system in many of our states, including NJ, will take 60-65% of his income, even unemployment, irregardless of what his spouse is earning. Imagine, a spouse with a $150,000 salary, collecting 65% of the income of a man scratching by on $405 per week unemployment, or a $40,000/year job. NJ would do it in a


So divorced men have good reason to be casting themselves from the decks.

Having lost their wives, their children, their assets, and finally their ability to earn a living, and being relegated to permanent poverty, divorced men are killing themselves in record numbers - over 15,000 men per year, killed by divorce.

[/b]



Our job is to support them, and encourage our government to notice, and care.


[/quote]

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Dervish
Knowflake

Posts: 625
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted January 21, 2009 05:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dervish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Interesting, the slant you give the depressed men here, and the depressed women in your other thread. Not to mention your empathy for one and hatred for the other.

I suppose if there's ever a twisted way to pin it on women, the numbers of children, elderly, cops, and native americans (very high for all) who commit suicide will also be put up.

If you're a healer, I sincerely and DEVOUTLY hope that you let clients know in advance, "MEN ONLY."

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katatonic
Knowflake

Posts: 6024
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted January 21, 2009 07:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for katatonic     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
venus i am still trying to figure out where you come from (and i don't mean mumbai)...if the following sounds one-sided to you it is because it is a rebuttal of sorts. many men are great fathers and - did you know? - if a voluntary agreement is reached between divorcing parents the law has no business getting involved?

while it is true that some men suffer such fates, there are a large number of men who do NOT want custody of their kids, who do NOT pay child support, and who move quite easily onto the next marriage. and many who claim to be focussed on their children think that means taking them to the movies and filling them up with junk for a few hours...or leaving them in their girlfriends' care while they take care of more important business..

i think the main reason women do not get suicidal after divorce is because they have children who depend on them for physical, emotional and every other kind of support! i myself have had moments when had i been childless i would not have bothered another step...

this report sounds like a man who has been mistreated and is angry about it. if a woman with custody of the kids is making 150K a year then she is paying a minimum of 40K for childcare, 50K for taxes and the rest for rent/mortgage, clothes, food and activities etc. in any case if she is making that much more than the dad, his burden is not expected to match hers...

my daughter's father contributed to her upbringing...no one had to take him to court for it, but it was never much and every month i had to ask him for it. at least because it was a voluntary arrangement i didn't have to pay taxes on it!

in another of your articles is mentioned the solution to the breakdown of society being a return to patriarchal system where the man earns the money and makes ALL the decisions about how to spend it, giving some to his wife IF she sleeps with him when HE says so!

and if such a wife divorces him it is not considered she suffered any serious abuse. and you talk about slaves...?

marriage is a two-way street and it gets jammed up if EITHER side has the upper hand!

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Mannu
Knowflake

Posts: 45
From: always here and no where
Registered: Apr 2009

posted January 21, 2009 08:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mannu     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
There are in general more men born than woman. For example for every 100 woman there might be 112 men. It must be natures way to kill those men, rather than those bloody court systems

Keeps both sexes in balance.

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Azalaksh
Knowflake

Posts: 982
From: New Brighton, MN, USA
Registered: Apr 2009

posted January 21, 2009 09:14 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Azalaksh     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
wait, let me speak plainly, that misandrous, shovenist tripe for what it is.
"Shovenist"???
quote:
Why do you think that, in pre civil war times, slaves were kept in the holes of ships and not allowed on the decks?
I doubt I'll give much credence to the intellect, grasp of history and reasoning ability of someone who doesn't know that it's the *hold* of a ship, and not the *hole*.....

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sunshine_lion
unregistered
posted January 22, 2009 04:39 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
survival of the fittest - Natural selection conceived of as a struggle for life in which only those organisms best adapted to existing conditions are able to survive and reproduce.

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amowls
Newflake

Posts: 4
From: Falls Church, VA, USA
Registered: Apr 2009

posted January 26, 2009 08:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for amowls     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Lol.

My best friend CeCe never knew her father. He has contacted her ONCE in the 21 years she has been alive. He has never once paid her mother child support or even sent my best friend a card on her birthday. She has made repeated attempts to get to know him, but he wants nothing to do with her.

My roommate doesn't know her biological father very well either. And neither does my friend Teo. He's never tried to contact his father because he knows that he's a lowlife.

My friend Whitney's parents divorced when he was 9. Since then his father has found a new wife and has 2 children with her. Even though he lives less than a mile from Whitney, he never wants to see him. Whitney hasn't seen him in 2 1/2 years. Before that he would only visit him on holidays.

The Libra Stellium/Leo Rising guy I dated had a deadbeat dad too. He was addicted to crack and hid it from my ex's mom. The way my ex describes his mother is lovely. His father, not so much. His parents divorced when he was a freshman in college. For a long time he and his mom suffered because his father couldn't stop doing drugs. They lost their house and became deeply in debt.

My friends' father and mother divorced before I met them. They moved to VA from Florida because their dad raped a 15 year old girl. Their mother divorced him and moved away because she didn't want her children around a predator. My friends never forgave him.

My boyfriend's father and mother separated amicably in Lithuania but he moved to Chicago. My boyfriend tried to live with his dad, but his father didn't have a good job and couldn't support him. My boyfriend had to work the night shift being a janitor in HIGH SCHOOL (meaning he'd go to work at night and wake up early in the morning for school.. sounds like hell imo). Eventually he gave up and moved back in with his mom because his father couldn't take care of him.

Yeah... always the woman's fault.

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