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Author Topic:   today
leo_on_fire
Knowflake

Posts: 120
From: Heiskell, TN 37754
Registered: Dec 2004

posted June 09, 2005 02:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for leo_on_fire     Edit/Delete Message
I cried today.
I cried so many tears.
I shed my soul.
And my broken heart bled through my eyes.
I feel the brick and ice packs its way.
Hardening me inside and out.

I yelled today.
I yelled so loud.
I released my mind.
And gave into the madness inside.
I feel my brain closing down.
Driving me to a land of la la.

I tore up the picture today.
I tore it to so many pieces.
I ripped out the newly placed parts.
And shred it into something unrecognizable.
I feel myself changing.
Turning me into someone I've never been.

I mourned today.
I mourned the only way I knew how.
I stuffed down practical sensible.
And I gave up the fight for once in my life.
I feel like I'm losing this.
Making that hole so recently filled, open up again.

I wrote today.
I wrote so many words.
I spilled myself onto that page.
And I fell into every word I wrote.
I feel like it's all over for me.
Seeming like I've lost all I've ever wanted to know.

I hated you today.
I hated you so much.
I vented my rage into all of this.
And realized how much I did not hate you.
I feel that I could never hate you.
Fighting to keep from loving you more, I wallow in this mess I made.

I hurt today.
I hurt so badly.
I screamed, and raged, and broke.
And I am left here broken, shattered.
I feel like my heart is in a corner crying too.
Crying to keep me from losing my mind.

I lost it today.
I lost it in a way I never meant to.
I ran from myself and kicked all the time.
And now I'm exhausted from wanting you so much.
I feel like I'm shutting down.
Trying to save what I haven't destroyed.

I stomped my heart today.
I stomped it into the ground.
I hated myself for being weak with you.
And I hated myself for falling in love too.
I feel like I made a mistake in doing so.
Searching for a logical reason to make me believe that it was a mistake.

But I can't find one.

I died today.
I died a horrible death.
I was filled with such pain and despair.
And now I feel no peace, I feel nothing but emptiness and sorrow.
I feel everything and nothing.
Feeling every touch, kiss, caress, breath, word spoken between us, everything.

And nothing.

kt

------------------
love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove.
William Shakespeare

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Bluemoon
Knowflake

Posts: 1069
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted June 09, 2005 04:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bluemoon     Edit/Delete Message
Wow KT!!! I just don't know what to say. Just WOW! Powerful! :bheart!

Beautifuly written. Sorry you are in pain. I feel you!

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leo_on_fire
Knowflake

Posts: 120
From: Heiskell, TN 37754
Registered: Dec 2004

posted June 09, 2005 04:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for leo_on_fire     Edit/Delete Message
*digs out bag of m&ms*
bad...bad bad..lol now look..i'ma od on m&ms....grr..lol

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Bluemoon
Knowflake

Posts: 1069
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted June 09, 2005 04:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bluemoon     Edit/Delete Message
chocolate is good for you! I think I will pull out the Chocolate chips! no need for cookie dough!

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Heart--Shaped Cross
Knowflake

Posts: 1466
From: north of Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004

posted June 09, 2005 08:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Heart--Shaped Cross     Edit/Delete Message

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sweetlibra
Knowflake

Posts: 411
From:
Registered: Oct 2004

posted June 10, 2005 04:37 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sweetlibra     Edit/Delete Message
leo_on_fire, this is awesome..
i can feel the passion.
he must be really lucky to be loved like this

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pixelpixie
Moderator

Posts: 178
From: Ontario Canada
Registered: Jun 2005

posted June 10, 2005 10:19 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for pixelpixie     Edit/Delete Message

*pass the M&M's this way please?

Even better.. ever have Skor bites?

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Sheaa Olein
Moderator

Posts: 2192
From: Laaandon
Registered: Jul 2004

posted June 10, 2005 11:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sheaa Olein     Edit/Delete Message
Mmm.. Skor bites? Sounds potentially tasty..

Ahh.. Skor bites

leo_on_fire ~ how very deep you've really portrayed the depths of rawness that someone can feel. I feel that! I write my best when emotions take over. Especially love

------------------
"The best of love, peace of mind and happiness I wish for you." Jimi Hendrix

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Bluemoon
Knowflake

Posts: 1069
From: Stafford, VA USA
Registered: Feb 2005

posted June 10, 2005 03:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bluemoon     Edit/Delete Message
I love skor bars, i didn't even know they had bites. Pass them this way!!!

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leo_on_fire
Knowflake

Posts: 120
From: Heiskell, TN 37754
Registered: Dec 2004

posted June 11, 2005 12:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for leo_on_fire     Edit/Delete Message
sweet libra...i don't think he knows.
Luck has nothing to do with it anymore.
its all inside of us..we just have to find the right path...right?
Today,i heard his heart break...wow....

gimme those skor bites..i'll share my m&Ms

------------------
love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove.
William Shakespeare

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