posted February 09, 2009 04:46 PM            

1) Those people we fall in love with, and fall out of love with. They touch us for a while and then it's over. It's over like we're done with each other for good. They never touched us for real, they never reached our soul even if we might have thought so when we were in love with them.

2) Those people we fall in love with and we sense something familiar about them, we feel a strange instant trust. It feels like coming home. We recognize each other, maybe from a previous life. We touch each others souls, for real. We SEE each other, and we know that this feeling never will fade no matter what happens. They will always be special to us. And it might not even be easy, it's probably insane because of all the deep stuff going on. Just intense. And painful. We have something to learn, some karma to sort out together...

posted February 09, 2009 05:06 PM              

-Someone that makes you feel more miserable than you could ever imagine, and who's very existence is a soul-crushing burden that makes you beg for death......SOULMATE

posted February 09, 2009 06:07 PM              

Is the one with whom you can share your intimate self,with all the love you can.

posted February 09, 2009 08:45 PM            

I think there's too much wrapped up in terminology, though I do think there is something as a karmic mate, which is something that now makes me run for the hills SCREAMING
So I don't know what a soulmate 'is'. I think it's a process of elimination. I know what a soulmate is not:

-Someone who abuses you in any way.
-Someone who abuses your trust.
-Someone who doesn't accept you as you are
-Someone who is scared of their own darkness, and in turn, scared of yours.
-Someone who does not respect you. There's no way around that one.
-Someone who expects you to sacrifice your own happiness and passions for them, even though they know it would make you miserable.
-Someone who does not believe in you.
-Someone who allows themselves to be consumed with jealousy regarding your gifts.
-Someone who wants to save you from yourself, and/or demands you to do the same.
-Someone who makes you more miserable than at peace and happy.
-Someone who doesn't care about your dreams and aspirations, and/or belittles them.
-Someone who abandons you in your hour of need.
-Someone who keeps you from growing in the direction you are meant to grow.
-Someone who is not able to be your friend.
-Someone who will not work with you on the relationship, who keeps fighting your progress.
-Someone who takes, and never gives.
-Someone who doesn't see YOU as you truly are (I guess acceptance is a theme here)

I'm sure there's a lot more. I think sometimes to define what something is, it's helpful to define what it's *not*.

Maybe even in the greatest relationships there are moments when a couple of things like in the above list come out a bit here and there over the long term (life gets in the way sometimes), but I think if these things become a dominant theme in a relationship, then that person is probably not a soulmate, or even a decent person for a relationship to begin with.

I've had love in some forms, sexual and non-sexual. I'm going to include sexual for me because it's extremely important in my life (though I don't think this would be important for everyone necessarily)...I think it's someone who you can be vulnerable with and they don't use it as ammunition against you....you can see each others' darkness and yet still see beyond it (in a realistic way).

I read somewhere that when you look at the person, even during the darkest hour, you can still see the god/dess aspect of them, and can see past the darkness, and so you aren't scared to go through it together...

I wonder because I'm not scared of my own darkness or shadow, and I'm not scared of others' darkness either...I feel like I can turn it to light. I always see past it, so it's very hard for me to distinguish the bond which is 'special', since I feel everyone is, and I can always shape-shift myself into what they need/want, which makes it hard. So I want to say that maybe it's a relationship where I don't need to shape-shift, though this is very hard for me - I do it constantly, and very, very easily...I daresay it's part of who I am. But I hate that I know exactly what someone needs sometimes and find myself giving it, even though sometimes I know I shouldn't.
I know what a Karmic mate is. I don't want to know who a twinsoul is. I don't need that kind of pain in my life anymore. Trying to figure out if they've incarnated or not, finding out they might be attached, or whatever. Who needs it.

I'd just like a solid bond which is not corrosive to my soul for once in my life, yet doesn't feel like Novocaine to my soul either...something that grows mutually, and is open yet rooted in reality as well as spiritually...someone who I can remove my armor with at the end of the day, not someone who makes me feel like I need to add to my armor. I can shed it at the end of the day and not worry about them trying to use my own strength or weakness against me. Someone who I can laugh with, and travel with, and yet also feel home with. Who's multi-faceted like me, and who's ready for that kind of bond.

Hey, I can dream....

posted February 10, 2009 06:09 AM              

quote:

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Someone that makes you feel more miserable than you could ever imagine, and who's very existence is a soul-crushing burden that makes you beg for death......SOULMATE

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LMAO aloof
hahaha yeah l can def relate to this one! lol

posted February 10, 2009 06:10 AM            

quote:

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In fact...the moment the woman I KNEW ex#2 secretly pined for became free...
I subtly brought them together. They married each other some 11 years ago and seem very happy!

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posted February 10, 2009 08:00 AM            

Luckily I know a whole lot about what I don't want (found out the hard way...maybe not so lucky )

"My children are my soulmates. And Mr Angel may not be "the eternal one" but I wouldn't want to spend my lifetime with anyone else. It's not ideal - but it's perfect."

PeaceAngel, I think this is just lovely ....it sounds like a slice of heaven to me.