Author
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Topic: I've Got To Be Honest- I'm Unhealthy, and I Need Help
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meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:13 PM
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meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:13 PM
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meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:14 PM
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Lara Knowflake Posts: 1847 From: aspideronmars Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:23 PM
oh geez Meta.you are saturn, 1st. He is moon, 7th. No aspect. Co significators. He is mars and you are venus. His mind (his 3rd ruler) is venus. His mind is on you and you are in his 7th. Your mind (your 3rd ruler) is mars. Your mind is on him and he is in your 6th house of health. Mars and venus no aspect. not sure what to say... ! IP: Logged |
popcorn Knowflake Posts: 370 From: Registered: Aug 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:26 PM
Feelings are not easy. I have read your story you write here for long time ago here so i remember little from that. I don´t know if you told the man your feelings for him. If i remember right you don´t told him nothing about that. I think you should be true to your self. Told him the feelings you have for him and after that go on... You have nothing to lose. IP: Logged |
meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:28 PM
I'm not sure what to do. Does that mean i should, or shouldn't go?If we make no aspect to one another- no Moon/Saturn, or Mars/Venus- then i should... try to move on without discussing with him? What do you think, personally? I'll take any advice i can get. IP: Logged |
meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:40 PM
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popcorn Knowflake Posts: 370 From: Registered: Aug 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:45 PM
Yes. Take a discuss whit him. In right occasion. If you tell him your feelings for him you never regret you taken wrong decison.He must take the choise in his hands. You can allways say to your self. I do all i can and i am tru to my self and listening to my feelings. What can happend if you talk to him? You must be tru to your self. IP: Logged |
venus in gemini Knowflake Posts: 153 From: Florida Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:47 PM
Meta, I remember your thread about this man. I'm so sorry that it is still causing such pain. It is grief, plain and simple. I can relate. Here is this meditation, for when you are ready. (( hugs ))Mastering The Art of Letting Go Over the course of my lifetime I have had many friends, family and one exhusband whom I had to say goodbye to. Sometimes I was the one being left behind, such as when my sister died. Sometimes I did the leaving such as occurred with my ex. Sometimes we both did the leaving such as with some of my friends. The pain of letting go is not imaginary. It’s physical. Even when both parties agree it’s time to let go, the pain is still there. Letting go is tough because the mind with its discernment of “it’s time!” can be out of sync with the heart which loves without judgment or reserve. There are two aspects to master when letting go of someone. The first is an emotional/chemical aspect. Just because the other person that you’ve loved has turned into an abusing ******* the heart doesn’t flip a switch and stop loving. This can be a physically painful time. The brain has been creating chemicals associated with the feelings of love generated with an energetic link to the loved one. When the energetic link is severed, the brain stops creating that chemistry and the cells of the body go through withdrawal symptoms. Hence, the physical pain of it all. This of course doesn’t include the anguish and grief of the heart. Grief is a group of emotions that has it’s own sense of timing. Your task is to be mindful of feelings of grief and fully experience them. Like the waves of an ocean, grief will rise at certain times and then recede. Breathing through the most potent part of the feelings will help the waves recede more quickly. Below is a meditation that you can use to support the body as it goes through physical changes when letting go. If you’re with someone who’s willing to do this with you as a ceremony for saying goodbye, please share it with them. Bring your awareness into your body with your breath. See the person you are letting go in front of you. Acknowledge that person and express appreciation to her or him for all the gifts they have brought you. Take your time with this. When you are ready state, “I choose to release our energetic, karmic, physical, and emotional/mental bonds of relationship in the vibration of love.” Send yourself and the person a heartfelt blessing for the next stages of your journeys. Now, tune into the feelings of love that you first felt for the person. With your perceptions and intention, shift that love link from the person to the Divine Source of love. This Divine Source is known as the Beloved in Sufi teachings. Allow your feelings of love to link to this Beloved. Feel yourself receiving the love from this source and expressing your love to this source. Affirm that all your relationships now and in the future are infused with the Beloved energy. Affirm that you aren’t losing love or the connection to the Beloved, only shifting the form. In the beginning process of letting go, repeat this meditation several or more times during the day. Sometimes, you are ready to let go but the other person isn’t. This can cause pain for both of you, as you feel his or her pain as well as your own. Or the other person is perhaps mentally unbalanced and isn’t going to let you go in a healthy and perhaps even frightening way. What’s being asked for here is a karmic intervention. The Lords of Karma are a group of beings who, with your request, can bring a karmic intervention. This involves not only releasing all karmic contracts and energetic connections, but balances the energetic scales between you and the other person. When you withdraw your energy from another person in any state but love, it creates a rebound affect that can snap back and affect you. Karmic intervention brings in energy in the vibration of love for both sides. There’s no judgment about right or wrong. It’s a blessing for everyone. This also works if someone has left you abruptly, and you are finding it hard to move on. Before beginning make sure you’ve done the energetic healing above with the person involved. Follow your breath and bring your awareness into your body. Ask to connect to the Lords of Karma. Ask for a karmic intervention with (name of the person) in past, present and future. Wait for the energy to quit shifting before you move on. Next ask for a karmic intervention with anyone else who might have been affected by the break up. If you know who these people are say their names one by one (such as your children, coworkers, etc.) After each name wait for the energy to move through you completely. You may get intuitive insights at this point to ask the Lords of Karma. Make your request. If it isn’t accepted, there’ll be a nonresponse. Complete by expressing gratitude to the Lords of Karma and all the people you are letting go. As the initial physical and emotional responses of letting someone go balance out, you can begin to turn toward the future and open your heart to future possibilities. http://scienceofenergyhealing.com/mastering-the-art-of-letting-go/ IP: Logged |
popcorn Knowflake Posts: 370 From: Registered: Aug 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 06:49 PM
Sorry i do not saw your replic after that i write before you.Im really sorry for you. IP: Logged |
meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 09:55 PM
Thank you very much.But i'm very hesitant to just jump into an impulsive decision... because this situation is so delicate. And i admittedly am working on many different things right now within myself. I just don't want to show up and try to talk to him, and be met with anything but sensitivity. That's why i turned to horary. To see what the Universe suggests. To see, also, whether HE is ready for me to come into contact with him. It's not just about what's best for me. IP: Logged |
Belage Knowflake Posts: 198 From: California Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 11:18 PM
In that chart, the sun and venus are conjunct which is nice, but this conjunction is opposed by Jupiter (lack of good judgement, wisdom, benevolence), Neptune (illusion and deceit), and Chiron (heartbreak).I totally understand that you love this man. I totally understand that this is making you sick. I went through something like that once, so my heart goes out to you. IP: Logged |
MyVirgoMask Knowflake Posts: 1631 From: Bay Area, CA Registered: May 2009
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posted August 18, 2009 11:38 PM
Significators are Saturn and the Moon, not Venus and Mars.Is there another woman involved, Meta? IP: Logged |
DepTaurus Knowflake Posts: 920 From: canada Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 12:15 AM
aww im sorry your going threw this. but im happy for you that you relaized it was time for a chnage and you got help yaya big hug.IP: Logged |
Diana Knowflake Posts: 855 From: Registered: May 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 12:18 AM
I hate to do this to you, but that chart is unreadable. You made it for the wrong day. It should've been dated for the 18th, not the 19th. You should redo it. I would take it as a sign I wasn't supposed to see him, but that's just me. What do you hope to accomplish from seeing him? IP: Logged |
popcorn Knowflake Posts: 370 From: Registered: Aug 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 12:49 AM
He know how you feel. You can not do any more to that. You have do all you can already.Maybe you can hope you come togheter so you can talk to each other like a friend and se what is happend. Your progresse chart?
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MyVirgoMask Knowflake Posts: 1631 From: Bay Area, CA Registered: May 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 01:38 AM
To be honest, Meta, the question itself is weird ... 'Should I see him?' is strange for something as black and white as horary. 'WILL I see him within X amount of time' would be better, or 'Does he want to see me', etc.Saturn makes an applying aspect to the moon. It's not major, but it's there. But it would be a potential answer to the question 'should I', which feels odd to me... unfocused. I think you're in a difficult situation... I think it's hard to determine whether or not you should see him. Whether it's good for you or not, etc. I am concerned about the Venus in the 7th, and the other woman (DUH, I just realized I asked this before and you said he was married... D'OH. Sorry, Meta. That was super-moronic on my part lol). Anyway... I think rephrase the question if possible. Make it more about outcome, etc. I also think it's totally your call on what to do here with this situation. Your own conscience is what is most important... having it feel clear is the most important thing, IMO, even if it means seeing him, resolving whatever. And I don't think it's the Universe which will not let the issue rest, I think it's the unconscious which won't, so it keeps sending the issue back to be wrapped up (and you are wise enough to know this already). And maybe it's never going to be 'resolved' in the conventional sense. Maybe it will just need to be messy until time heals... Maybe he is also symbolic of something deeper at the moment as well .... IP: Logged |
MyVirgoMask Knowflake Posts: 1631 From: Bay Area, CA Registered: May 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 01:39 AM
apologies, DPIP: Logged |
AcousticGod Knowflake Posts: 1678 From: acousticgod@sbcglobal.net Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 02:02 AM
Meta, what do you mean when you say he keeps popping up in your life? Does that mean you see him around town, and it tortures you, or do you mean that you keep having periodic interactions with him? IP: Logged |
Diana Knowflake Posts: 855 From: Registered: May 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 03:02 AM
This chart was made for the wrong day -- it can't be read as is....IP: Logged |
iQ Knowflake Posts: 682 From: Chennai, India Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 05:41 AM
I can help with some Visualizations that have helped myself and many many others. Pls send me a mail to tsaied@rediffmail.com------------------ Soul Mate Love Calculator http://tamsoft.co.in/articles.html IP: Logged |
aka Kat Knowflake Posts: 169 From: Cleveland, Ohio Registered: Jun 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 07:09 AM
Meta , I think you are asking the wrong questions. If you truly want inner healing and to move forward with your life the questions should revolve around -what do I want for my future? How do I visualize my life? Avoid asking questions that focus on the past and what you do not want. What we focus on expands. Thoughts in mind produce like in kind. Instead try on ( with your therapist) why did I get involved in a difficult, non-reciprocal relationship(married man) to begin with. Why do I feel hesitant of letting go? What are my fears about choosing a loving, reciprocal relationship? Explore if you have any feelings about deservability and being lovable. Do you feel you are worthy of true love? How can I better react in the future? What are my strengths in all areas of your life? How will I feel when I have healed this relationship? Make a list of 100 positive traits you have. If you have PTSD from a broken relationship ask yourself why you truly want to go back to see him. PTSD is usually found with military. Saying you want to go back to see him is like a soldier wanting to go back to the frontline of war. Your still wounded - give up all notions of wanting to see him to heal this situation, try on the possibility that you want to go back to see him for the sake of just seeing him. No, don't do that to yourself. What else do you want for yourself? do you want to learn French? Travel to a particular destination? Overcome your fear of heights by climbing a mountain. Eat healthier? Start focusing on you, not anyone else. If you want to heal you, think of no one else. Your future is waiting for you to step up to the plate, release all thoughts of then and live in the now. Right now you are healed and whole if you drop the idea that you are carrying what has happened back then. In reality only your mind still carries this weight. Drop it and see how much lighter and freer you will be. IP: Logged |
Cheshire Kat Knowflake Posts: 369 From: Wonderland Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 08:08 AM
Everyone has given some really good advice. I wonder though, do you really have to meet with him personally to heal or for closure?It sounds heart wrenching that you have to go through this but thank goodness your not alone though with the help of the older LL members.<3 IP: Logged |
meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 10:44 AM
quote: I hate to do this to you, but that chart is unreadable. You made it for the wrong day. It should've been dated for the 18th, not the 19th. You should redo it. I would take it as a sign I wasn't supposed to see him, but that's just me. What do you hope to accomplish from seeing him?
Wow. Can't believe i typed the wrong date. But i did redo the chart, AND the question. So i shall post that in a minute... I hope to accomplish closure. I hope to make piece with this part of my life, and move on. I feel like this situation, this person, is hindering my growth. quote: To be honest, Meta, the question itself is weird ... 'Should I see him?' is strange for something as black and white as horary. 'WILL I see him within X amount of time' would be better, or 'Does he want to see me', etc.
I hear you MVM. I redid it. This time i really chewed over the question before i asked it. Hopefully the answer is more "clarified". Though i've heard asking the same horary question over and over kills the chart? quote: Meta, what do you mean when you say he keeps popping up in your life? Does that mean you see him around town, and it tortures you, or do you mean that you keep having periodic interactions with him?
I mean "popping up" as in, i'm sitting at the mechanic's, and his car is there. And then i go inside and he calls on the phone and says he's on his way and i panic and leave. Or i park my car at Wal Mart and i see him exitting the store, and i speed away because i feel like i'm in mortal danger. Or that people in my life- some who are friends, other just strangers- bring him up. It's just trigger, after trigger, after trigger. ... And i think that may be accurate. I mean, I'M going places. I'm trying to grow. I've left him. And i'm still trying to do that now- and have been trying all summer. So maybe i'm unable to move on because he won't let me go...? IP: Logged |
meta_4 Knowflake Posts: 382 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 19, 2009 10:49 AM
Corrected Horary:
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