posted August 19, 2009 11:32 AM         

I'm living with my bf of 1 year in a very small town, where he is originally from. We moved here b/c he got really tired of the city, and we thought it might ease my depression (from my last Saturn opp Mars transit 4 months ago). At first it was a very relaxing place, and actually a pretty nice change from the hustle and bustle of the city. However, it has been about 4 months, and I feel like I am slowly stagnating. I'm 19 and I'm a an artist/performer. I act, I sing, I dance. This is what I literally cannot live without, and something that I've been putting on hold, but feel that I cannot hold off on it any longer. The problem is that in the area we are in now, THERE IS NOTHING THERE! He is a chef, and although he does not mind the lack of civilization in the area, he too cannot stay there forever because there's nothing there for him EITHER. (whether he realizes that or not). At the moment, he wants to go to school and just get an associate's degree in culinary studies (eventhough he's already been working as a chef for several years in top city restaurants) b/c he feels that he is not getting the recognition (or the pay for that matter) that he deserves based on his level of expertise. I support him in this, but I just know that I cannot stay here 2 years. I feel like I am wandering around aimlessly at a pointless FOOD & BEVERAGE job, with no point or purpose to my existence.

posted August 19, 2009 11:44 AM         

Our synastry:

posted August 19, 2009 12:49 PM         

You say you are an artist/performer, you act, sing, and dance. I see that your chart ruler, Mercury is very strongly aspected.

posted August 19, 2009 12:55 PM         

Well, no it's not boredom, it's the lack of creative opportunities or being able to accomplish what I need to do. I'm a performer and I literally feel suffocated if I cannot pursue that. Management really isn't my cup of tea. Thanks for the suggestions, though! Mind you, as far as performing goes, I'm not really shooting for super stardom or anything like that... just enough money to live off doing what I love

My dad lives like 40 min from NYC and he has a few connections in the "art" world. A few of his friends are artists, musicians, directors (although not on a large scale). My dad also really believes in me and my dream. He's always been very encouraging of my pursuing it.

I haven't really thought about part time in both places... hmmm I guess that could be an option? Although it would be really hard to work that out with jobs...

My father lives with his wife (who is a vocal coach) ... I don't know if he'd have room for me AND my bf? Plus, from personal experience, living with family and your bf is a REALLY bad idea... it's ruined many a relationship for me in the past...

I'm really hesitant about doing the long-distance thing... Everyone I know that has tried it, it killed the relationship... I feel like that's b/c relationships need constant connection and the distance hinders that quite a bit...

I really do feel like it's rare to find somebody that wants to work on the relationship and stay with it during the hard times as much as I do, and I really care about him so I really don't want to lose that. You know what I mean? Gah! Could that Saturn opp. Mars transit be making me feel so crazy?

posted August 19, 2009 01:07 PM         

Wow, that definitely makes quite a bit of sense! I am very grateful for your insight!

So your advice would be to just stay in the area for like a year or so with my bf and try to hone my artistic skills? Did I understand you correctly? Thank you, that does give me a bit of a different (more mature) perspective on things.

I've got to be honest, I do sometimes feel as if I'm in a hurry. With the industry that I'm interested in, most people start when they are toddlers. Starting to pursue that kind of career at the ripe age of 19, (I've been told) is a bit "old" for that line of business. Maybe this is just a misconception, but I thought "youth is everything" in the show-biz industry!

posted August 19, 2009 01:18 PM         

i waited tables on and off for years. it was only when i started to see it as a performance situation that i realized i was in control, not the company or the customers. they were the audience and the energy of the whole show was really down to me...not only did i make more money than the people around me, but i enjoyed the job so much more from that perspective, and freed up so much energy that had been going into resistance that other avenues opened up outside the job that made life much more satisfying....

saturn transits are about dealing with what IS, and in the first house that is focussed on YOU, your personality, etc...so use this as an opportunity to practice presence and you may be surprised what transpires.

how far are you from the city? is new york the closest one? or is there someplace a bit smaller where you could get involved in a community theatre? my dad was a world-class actor who attained several parts in broadway plays that he never took because his lifestyle demanded more money than they would pay him. but there was NO time in his life when he was not lending his talents to the local theatre, which kept him from going crazy i am sure...

posted August 19, 2009 01:33 PM         

Starkiss!! Your daughter's my age? That's so interesting! When is her birthday? I hope she is doing well!

Katatonic! Your response really opened up my eyes... it's so great to hear from another performer about her experiences... well I live in WV right now... very far from EVERYTHING... and the environment feels suffocating b/c I'm originally from a big city in Russia and and lived in big cities most of my life... but I can definitely understand what you're saying... I'd like to add that I've moved 19 times in my life so that can also account for the feeling of restlessness...

posted August 19, 2009 01:51 PM         

Believe in yourself, and work at it. Become a perfectionist at what you do so that you can be one of the bests.

posted August 19, 2009 02:09 PM         

"You rock!" Aww Belage, you made me smile!!

What you said about the Virgo rising thing does put me a little bit more at ease... A lot of people tell me that I look really young but I act much older... if that makes sense? They say that how I dress and act is more mature and sophisticated...So you really think that my chart has a lot of potential to accomplish all those things??

You all have made my day a million times better!! Thank you!

posted August 20, 2009 12:11 AM         

some questions are there any acting schools or music theatres where you are. if you try and find something you can go there and pratice. get unwinded.

defintly dont move in with your dad with your bf. my sister is doing this now and its really hard on them. because you know once you move in there your gunna wanna move right back out in two weeks.
but you said your dad has connections you can always call him up and ask him to introduce you then you can like take a flight out to places and meet them and be in the same place where you live and come home at the end of the day. and not have to move at all.

posted August 20, 2009 07:00 AM         

As I see it here are your options

posted August 21, 2009 07:12 PM         

I have talked to him, and I told him that I was unhappy and that I felt stagnated, and he wants to help solve the issue but he says that we just don't have enough money to move anywhere right now (and he's right about that). So he agreed to help me save up

But it's like Belage and katatonic said, right now is more a time of "preparation and learning and MATURING" not necessarily a time for "getting anywhere." Makes a lot of sense!

posted August 21, 2009 08:43 PM         

We should work on something together. I is an ac-tris. Plus i have Mercury in Virgo, so we're both perfectionist. I would understand your craziness!!!

What kinda stuff do you like? From your description of yourself i'd say Cabaret/Musical Theater?

But on a side note, i just wanted to express to you some serious wisdom that my dear PeaceAngel told me a long time ago,

"Obstacles are there for a reason."

posted August 21, 2009 08:59 PM         

the age thing is completely irrelevant no matter how young performers feel pressured to look! when i first saw patti smith she was 31 (shock/horror) in a business where most people started lying about their age at 21!!

you have already started! now is time for homework, character building, practice practice practice.

posted August 21, 2009 11:13 PM         

meta_4 I would pretty much love ANY kind of acting... my goal is to be as versatile as possible... and I LOVE cabaret and musical style especially.... and you're right! I am very perfectionistic when it comes to my craft! But honestly, like I said, for me versatility is key so I'm pretty much up for anything What kind do you prefer?

I understand what you mean by obstacles are there for a reason. Would this kind of go along with the whole "Saturn in 1st" theory? Meaning, just ride the wave of boredom with my bf by my side and prepare for high times to come?

posted August 21, 2009 11:33 PM         

I have pretty much concluded that the only way to make it as an artist is to create. In other words, you can't wait for the work to come to you, YOU have to make the work.

I'm a drama gal. Straight plays, but interested in Independent Film- Art House junk that no one ever sees!

But if you're serious about this, i've you've got "the bug" as they call it, then nothing will keep you from it. It will come naturally.

SO, when i said that obstacles are there for a reason i meant this: This problem is a test. The Universe is testing your will. Challenging you. Right now you need to make a choice about where your life is going to go. Are you going to be a performer? Or are you going to be a devoted significant other? Sometimes you can't have both. Sometimes you choose one, and regret it later. Sometimes you choose one, and cherish the decision. And sometimes, if you make the wrong decision, the Universe grants you another try. There are really so many ways life can go!

I think you need to sit down and be honest with yourself. Because inside you- deep, deep down- you already know the answer to this. You already know what you want. What you will choose. If it's your lover, then be the best lover you can possibly be. If it's performing, then be a show-stopper. You need to admit it, and accept it. No use fighting the inevitable- even if it hurts.

Good luck. I send my best wishes out to you.

posted August 21, 2009 11:55 PM         

I'm going to be blunt! You are at the right age to get in there and start fighting for parts. I am a musician and I've done musical theatre here in New York City and the cold hard truth is that you ARE wasting time if you are not here in the city. There are thousands of women your age who are HERE! You are 19 years old, wanting to be and actress and musical performer. You are the age they are looking for NOW!!! NOW!!! Saturn is quickly moving away from the opposition to your Mars. The stagnation is lifting. What are you waiting for?

I was always told that I had plenty of time, etc. and on and on. It's bull. I moved to the city when I was 23 to go to music school. I think it was a crock. I was ready to get started but took everyone's advice to study. By the time I was finished I was mid to late 20's and life kicks in, all kinds of issues. You're too young to settle down with someone at 19. Why move away from the capital of where everything is happening for you?

In this country, if you want any kind of entertainment industry success on a realistic level, you have to be in New York or L.A. Bottomline, no if's and's or butts about it. I know you love your boyfriend but you are setting yourself up to watch him study for his goals while you, what? Wait tables? WWWWWWWWWHHHHYYYYYYY????

The reality: You have to be here or willing to commute. Not many people have the opportunity to have one of their parents be incredibly supportive of them, to the point of allowing them to stay with them in the city. Do you know how many millions of people all over the world wish they had the same opportunity that you have. They would give anything just to be within the tri-state area. Just to be here, and they KNOW they could make it happen. Proximity is 90 percent of the battle.

Your charts vocational profile suggests that you could be an artist or teach the arts, artistic writing and communication is exceptionally STRONG in your chart. Take it from someone who knows, do it now while you're young and healthy and have the world at your fingertips and network, network, network, DO NOT BE AN ISOLATOR. Go out and socialize and let everyone you meet know that you're looking for professional acting, dancing and musical opportunities.