Author
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Topic: Other people are so emotionally shallow from my point of view :(
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RunAroundScreaming Knowflake Posts: 386 From: USA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 02:42 AM
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aquarian/scorpio Knowflake Posts: 205 From: Middle Earth Registered: Apr 2009
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posted January 25, 2011 04:41 AM
I know exactly where you are coming from <3 There are alot of superficial folks out there...Alot of people always ask me 'why are you single?' Well I just tell them just what I said before... But not everyone is like this..I know that can be hard to see sometimes..it's just finding them. Even with just friendships alone I am aware of who I regard as a 'friend' and one of the reason why I do not keep many.But I will say one thing the guy you was seeing sounds young and is young.. If someone wrongs me I don't give them the opportunity to do it again..I just keep them at a distance. You say 'That's why I think a Cancer could only be truly happy with another Cancer' Well it depends on the whole chart..You may come across a Cancer who has alot of Air/Fire in their chart which could just disposition the Water...So just remember to look further than their Sun sign.. IP: Logged |
RunAroundScreaming Knowflake Posts: 386 From: USA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 04:57 AM
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Agent_009 Knowflake Posts: 464 From: Planet Shining Registered: May 2009
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posted January 25, 2011 05:23 AM
RUNAROUND, ["AND I AM NEVER evER trusting someone who is not a water sign EVER again."]--I know how you feel, how people can be so inconsiderate with others. I dont believe this has anything to do with signs as it does with someone's maturity perspective...when it comes to selfishness & empathy for others. Some people are selfish enough even though they acknowledge right & wrong, they still refuse to put themselves in other's shoes. It's a lack of RESPECT & empathy, but being WATER doesnt automatically make one, "empathetic in a respectful way." I find many water signs arent able to distinguish this fact...as I know of many waters who $lut around hurting others to fulfill their own selfish needs too. Also having empathy doesnt necessarily mean one is able to put aside their own selfish needs. I also think it comes down to inherent soul awareness. Perhaps you've already "been there, done that enough," in past lives that you dont need to go around shack'n up & hurting others. There's a reason the Krishnamurti's of the world all stayed celibate for life. Been there, done that, & no need to go there again. IP: Logged |
aquarian/scorpio Knowflake Posts: 205 From: Middle Earth Registered: Apr 2009
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posted January 25, 2011 06:40 AM
Agent makes a very good point..Water is not always positive.. I was interested in a Pisces Sun/Scorpio Moon for a while and he seemed interested in me. He seemed very mature for his age,(he is 19 I just turned 24) seemed to know what he wants ect.. I really saw him as my type of friend as we had alot of the same point of views. But then he started to express traits I didn't appreciate such as not sticking to what he says (breaking promises), always having excuses and just basically plain inconsistent... I was and am still a bit disappointed and I have given up now I even given up considering him as friend potential. He was already causing fraustrations... Also we have pretty good synastry by aspect and house! From what I remember we have: Sun trine Moon/Pluto conjunct Valentine Moon conjunct Moon/Pluto Venus conjunct N.N/Mars Venus trine Venus/Saturn Venus sextile Mercury Venus sextile Chiron Mars opposition Venus/Saturn Mars sextile Mars Mars conjunct Chiron Mars bi-quintile Moon/Pluto This is just an example of some of the aspects we share there are more...but I can't be asked to put then all up to be frank. But my point is that if both parties are evolved enough then it can work no matter how the synastry is.. Also it is good to observe someones natal to before looking at the synastry.. Alot of people do posess the tools (natal chart) but whether they are aware and use them is another thing!
x p.s If there is any spelling errors ect apologies...I am bit all over the place atm.. hehe IP: Logged |
Anglerfish Knowflake Posts: 54 From: Registered: Jan 2011
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posted January 25, 2011 07:31 AM
I'm feeling you Runaround.I'd love to be with a Cancer. I want somebody I can balance all my cappy with. Plus somebody I can bake for and who will be committed to our family. I heard Cancer's make great dads and providers. I love Linda Goodman's Sun Sign's description of the Cancer male... quote: If i tell someone that i like them---i am very serious about that. I have studied your personality and seen how you are, and that feeling is not going to go away ever. It just never has for me...never has happened. I can like several people at the same time, of course, but once i'm with one person there's just no turning back....because it's just so easy for me to forgive people's faults that i will always be there. That is, once again, unless they show that they are scum in some way.....that they have been manipulating or deceiving me and never really cared about me.If someone were to break up with me, i would never ever go back to them. Because i couldnt imagine breaking someone's heart who i truly care about, soooo nope yeah they dont truly care about me, is the way i see it.
I'm like that too. But I've got Juno (Sco) sextile Venus/Saturn Cap so that kind of explain it. I agree that most guys just use girls. That why i'm almost 21 and I've never been on a date. Plus cap is fussy. I guess this could be a cap/cancer thing. Or a water sign thing. I have Pisces Sun, Scorpio Asc and Cancer Jupiter(trine my sun) I couldn't be physically intimate with someone without it being serious. Otherwise I'd feel so violated. IP: Logged |
RunAroundScreaming Knowflake Posts: 386 From: USA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 10:55 AM
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Ami Anne Moderator Posts: 5745 From: Pluto/house next to NickiG Registered: Sep 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 11:09 AM
((((RAS)))))------------------ Jesus never put his trust in man cuz he knew what was in man. You must face,touch and feel the dregs of Nessus before you can grasp the pristine beauty of Neptune. Me IP: Logged |
RunAroundScreaming Knowflake Posts: 386 From: USA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 12:09 PM
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Doux Rêve Knowflake Posts: 128 From: Everywhere :) Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 05:46 PM
RunAroundScreaming, I fully relate to everything you have written. There are so many shallow folks out there. Quite sad. Anyway, Scorpios are known for their REAL, deep, intense feelings. They can only be true to themselves. Too bad Scorpio guys are often.. not that good, to say the least.IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve Knowflake Posts: 128 From: Everywhere :) Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 05:50 PM
Oh, by the way, I have 4 planets in water (all in Scorpio), Mars conjunct Pluto and no fire. Earth and Air equally balanced, and Water too.But, I wonder if Moon Chiron aspects play a part in it. I have the conjunction and apparently everything Moon-related, ie feelings, emotions, is of hardcore importance with hard aspects. Do you have any significant Chiron aspects? IP: Logged |
RunAroundScreaming Knowflake Posts: 386 From: USA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 07:29 PM
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RunAroundScreaming Knowflake Posts: 386 From: USA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 25, 2011 07:31 PM
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Lucia23 Knowflake Posts: 1919 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted January 26, 2011 12:47 PM
There are so many ways to look at everything.I have three major planets in Cancer in my chart, I take everything so HEAVILY emotionally, I take rejection so hard. And I'm just sick of those parts of myself, like, oh, boo hoo, woe is me--my Leo Sun wants FUN. I wish all my heavy-duty Cancer stuff would just give me a break already. I think there's a lot that's really GOOD--fun, life-affirming, enjoyable, light--about having the flexibility to explore different kinds of connections, to leave someone you aren't in love with and start talking to/getting to know someone new you find very attractive. I think kissing someone beautiful out of fun and lust/horniness sounds like a great idea...maybe better than obsessing weeks or months later about someone who broke up with me. There's a fine line between emotional depth and being a soggy, needy, clingy wet blanket who ends up demanding all sorts of security and nurturing from other people...when really, it isn't that fun or sexy or exciting or life-affirming for other people to be asked to provide that. If I were a young man, I wouldn't want to be involved with someone who thought I had a heavy-duty emotional obligation to her---as a not-so young woman, I also don't want to be with someone who's all heavy and desperate that way. I want to be with someone inspiring and FUN who makes my heart sing!! That can be deep. Sometimes I feel like all those "shallow" people are off happily making out with each other and making new friends, which is a better way to live than posting about one's ex on an astrology website. IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve Knowflake Posts: 128 From: Everywhere :) Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 26, 2011 02:48 PM
I don't know if Chiron is related to this. But I was supposing that planets touched by it would be very.. "wounded" and therefore would want to protect themselves. With the Moon, I guess it would want to seek emotional security and stability. With the Sun.. there might be a strong need for settled identity and a sense of self-worth.Scorpio guys. Well, I don't know many of them. My dad is one. He seems good on the outside. But he has done lots of awful things to my mum. I have heard many women say they can't be faithful, are too violent, careless, cold and insensitive to their needs. Not all of them are like that of course. But when it comes to romance, Scorpio can be really tough. I think the problems with Scorpio people steem from their intensity and need for exclusive relationships. They want ALL of you. Your time, your thoughts, your actions, your body, your soul. Too much to handle.
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Lei_Kuei Knowflake Posts: 185 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted January 26, 2011 03:08 PM
I love your screen name "RAS", something I do a lot for fun hehe IP: Logged |
racole12 Knowflake Posts: 834 From: the world is my home! Registered: Feb 2010
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posted January 26, 2011 04:15 PM
I don't know if someone has asked this...Are you going thru any major Pluto transits? When I'm going thru a pluto transit I always feel this way (as in thinking people are emotionally shallow or me craving very intense relationships) IP: Logged |
Benedict Moon* Knowflake Posts: 1709 From: Avendesora Registered: May 2009
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posted January 26, 2011 09:07 PM
It must be something in the air because I'm feeling so hypersensitive and melodramatic right now that I only want another Cancer or someone who's just very heavy in water....hahaha. Seriously...sorry about the guy. He sounds like a douche.
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filly Knowflake Posts: 57 From: Ipswich,UK Registered: Nov 2010
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posted January 26, 2011 10:02 PM
Many times I thought exactly same way as you. Many people are really shallow, they may not have depth but they sure take it easier...The time we spend studing, observing and feeling with all intensity, they are enjoying themselves with simple thoughts on their minds. It's said that the doors of heaven are always open for fools! If someone doesn't realise the other side of things they can't be sinning, worring, suffering. Even if they don't have the rewards of an intense life, full of meaning and purpose. Different karmas I guess! I'm on my own coz nothing or no one can satisfy me, I wish I could be satisfied with a little less! I have Pluto in the 12H opposit venus in Aries conjunct Mars! And can be very intensively obsessive... Gladly I have other aspects to lighten up coz many people can't handle such intensity and run away. So I've learned to express it in a creative way naturaly. Every time I have to opiniate about something I go through with a comical drama My sense of humor allows me to make fun of myself, so deep as I am I undertand when I'm being too much! Melodrama suits me well...LOl I've learned to accept that peoples lives change, good friends we make, good friends we loose...along the way We all have to follow our destiny and learn new lessons... The friends that must say, they will... If not, I'll always remember them with foundness and thank that they made a chapter of my life richer! Learn to live and let live without judging and learn to let go freely- is my Motto (and this when what I really wanted was to keep them forever of course even if I had to lock them somewhere! ) I noticed that people like us can bring a deeper level of conscienceness in other people without even realizing... Maybe we are here to teach them something too. It's all in our expression to make them feel confortable enough and say: Give me your hand and come to see my world! I think this was one of my lessons, I'm able to let go now. And I'm able to communicate in order to get a satisfying answer... But still comes to hunt me the insatisfaction of not finding someone more often who can dive with me in the deep waters of Poseidon... xx IP: Logged |
RunAroundScreaming Knowflake Posts: 386 From: USA Registered: Oct 2010
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posted January 27, 2011 12:08 PM
Filly...so ur a pisces.Funny how all of what u said describes how i feel. But, i dont think that we water signs need to accept that all friends come and go. Some friends come and go---the ones that are incompatible with us. But certainly not all! Very few will remain--that's true...but im sure u will find at least one person who will never leave. Ur absolutely right. In the "legend of the zodiac" the feminine signs are put on this earth to fill others up with SUBSTANCE. For water it is to fill them up with deep lasting emotions to make them CARE about things. For earth it is to fill them up with the need to complete projects and to make things last, whether that be a relationship or a project in the material world. What happens is that masculine signs are extroverts. Extroverts seek outer stimulation to reinforce their pride in themselves--they want others to admire them for their abilities....so they're kind of attention ****** . I'm sure they would make out with someone casually because to them, it's showing off their making out abilities and their attractiveness or sexuality. Do u really think we could get along with someone whothinks like the leo who posted above for example? No, we would see them as shallow. However, i dofind that water signs are less judgemental. Of we are friends with an attention seeking ***** , we are more likely to stick around because we see their good qualities and try to accept them as they are---with understanding. the masculine signs alsodont want to focus ontheir vulnerabilities. They want to feel proud and admired at all times. So thats why they dont want to give advice to someone who needs a lot of it. They may even have those feelings themselves, but they dont want to FOCUS on their feelings! Theyd rather avoid the truth and just go with superficialities until they forget about their feelings. Earth signs are kinda similar in this way...but they do not have a problem saying their vulnerabilities as long as they dont think they will be judged for it...and since water signs are nonjudgemental, they will most likely open up to us. The feminine signs appreciate vulnerability....because it doesnt hurt their image of themselves like it does the masculine signs. Masculine signs always want to be perceived as strong (fun people, to be admired) whereAs feminine signs are more concerned about being seen as good people (who are vulnerable from time to time and who have substance and meaning). Dunno if i can trust earth signs yet, tho..anybody want to helpe understabd earth signs better? Lol. Are theyreally superficial or not? Do they avoid vulnerability like the masculine signs or not?
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Lucia23 Knowflake Posts: 1919 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted January 27, 2011 12:55 PM
I think signs of all four elements, masculine and feminine, can be deep. Or, can be shallow.There are different kinds of depth. In this thread it seems like clinginess, emotional attachment, and passive-aggressiveness are being confused with depth. To me depth often involves a deep, rich spiritual practice...intense intellectual rigor...making plans and decisions in life consciously and conscientously...asking deep, hard questions. I guess a lot of those things are about intellectual or spiritual depth more than emotional...but I see emotional depth as a practice of open-heartedness and compassion. If you're very young and you like someone enough enough to date them very briefly, but then decide you aren't really that interested in them--you aren't in love with them, thrilled by them, craving lots of time with them and getting to know them more deeply--and then after you let them know that you aren't interested, you start pursuing someone else you're interested in--why is that shallow? I don't understand why that would make the young man shallow or a jerk. Or a "douche." Being resentful about a romantic rejection is completely human and deeply understandable, but not a sign of depth. Wanting to keep someone with you forever is arguably just as shallow as wanting to get away from someone. quote: However, i dofind that water signs are less judgemental.
Calling someone else "emotionally shallow" is the very definition of judgmental! Not that judgmental is always bad.... IP: Logged |
swirl-kitt Knowflake Posts: 256 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted January 27, 2011 01:26 PM
ORlol after what lucia said it's hard to add anything but anyways, maybe this teaches you a lesson. if you feel like you have a vulnerable ego (most of us do), just don't get physical with a guy for 2-3 months after you begin dating. See if he likes spending his weekends with you, introducing you to his friends etc Some men will deny this, but if you are honest about what you want, they will tell you the truth. If they really like you, they will wait. They will make plans with you and treat you like a princess, no matter how slow you want to take things, or no matter how jealous you are. Still, they might change their minds in the 4th month, or the 10th year of the relationship !!! but it's worth giving it a try !!! good luck IP: Logged |
swirl-kitt Knowflake Posts: 256 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted January 27, 2011 01:36 PM
I used to think that I would never put pressure on someone when it comes to relationships.Why not get physical anyways ? If it's gonna work, it's gonna work. But then I realized that either I would feel like I don't like the guy- in which case I would break up with them and it wouldn't be a nice memory, or I would fall in love and if it ends just because they want to end it, I got seriously hurt. So by trial and error, I learned that taking things slow might work better for me. and I'm a water sign so you can trust me IP: Logged |
blugrey Knowflake Posts: 270 From: Portland, OR USA Registered: Nov 2010
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posted January 27, 2011 01:47 PM
quote: Originally posted by Lucia23: I think signs of all four elements, masculine and feminine, can be deep. Or, can be shallow.There are different kinds of depth. In this thread it seems like clinginess, emotional attachment, and passive-aggressiveness are being confused with depth. To me depth often involves a deep, rich spiritual practice...intense intellectual rigor...making plans and decisions in life consciously and conscientously...asking deep, hard questions. I guess a lot of those things are about intellectual or spiritual depth more than emotional...but I see emotional depth as a practice of open-heartedness and compassion. If you're very young and you like someone enough enough to date them very briefly, but then decide you aren't really that interested in them--you aren't in love with them, thrilled by them, craving lots of time with them and getting to know them more deeply--and then after you let them know that you aren't interested, you start pursuing someone else you're interested in--why is that shallow? I don't understand why that would make the young man shallow or a jerk. Or a "douche." Being resentful about a romantic rejection is completely human and deeply understandable, but not a sign of depth. Wanting to keep someone with you forever is arguably just as shallow as wanting to get away from someone. Calling someone else "emotionally shallow" is the very definition of judgmental! Not that judgmental is always bad....
This is amazing! <3 Thank you so much for writing this! People in the astrological community seems to only have one view of "depth". As a Gemini, I often notice how we are put down as shallow simply because we have a variety of interests, and also shallow because we have difficulties staying in a relationship for a long time. I felt very sad, because while those things can be true, I do have depth in other areas - such as writing and be able to understand people from all different backgrounds and helping people come together. I think ALL signs have strengths and weaknesses and there shouldn't be just one definition. Also, to the OP. I think many people are very scared, men and women. We are surrounded by images of who we should be, and I argue that some of those people who seem "So shallow" are probably just very desperately lonely and hurt individuals who have conformed to what society says is good in order to be liked. Maybe there are some bad people in the world, but I bet most of them were created by this world, and not from some bad place inside themselves. Or maybe they are simply private in a different kind of way and don't wish to share those things openly and so they seem to gloss over the important things. In my mind, I always wish to go deeper with people, but it's often uncomfortable, but that doesn't mean those deeper feelings and thoughts don't exist. With Water and Fire signs usually, their emotions are much more accessible on the surface. Air and Earth tend to hold on to theirs more and distrust them more. It's a different way, but each one is special in it's own way. IP: Logged |
Frozen Queen Moderator Posts: 108 From: 11th Dimension Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 28, 2011 06:34 AM
It's the North Node that tells more about a soul's level of evolution than the element of their Sun.______________________ Ah! To be a fly on God's wall... IP: Logged |