posted February 08, 2011 12:54 PM            

in other words, all your ideas are possible, no one idea is wrong or right.

but the possibility of not finding love ever is very unlikely based on any once ascendant.

posted February 08, 2011 01:28 PM            

i know my lady is a cancer riser, and i'm the one for her.

try to give what i said a chance to sink in, i am not trying to give you the kind of answers you say you don't want, its just the truth. do you consider the possibility that you perhaps want people to tell you the answer that You want it to be? or do you want the truth?

anyway.. the point of my post is that saturn ruling the 7th doesnt mean naything you concern for in regards to not finding the one.

astrology doesnt work in exacts, that is the answer.

astrology works in energies and themes and possibilities within a theme.

one planet doesnt not equal x. a planet is a host of possible outcomes and meanings, in other words,

a theme of a house in a chart offers abcd

a planet can offer xyds

an aspect between two planets can mean dyzl

then what do we do? we have the potential for so many meanings by mixing different parts of the equation, the result could be

dcba

what saturn square venus in one chart means can mean a different up bringing than someone else with the same aspect, but what it will promise is one way ro another, saturn-square-venus energy is playing out in their life, but it doesnt mean because in one persons life, it turned out they had no father and was underloved, means it was the same in someone elses life. in someone elses life thye couldve had a very stable up bringing and two parents happily married, but maybe they dedicated alot of their time to their carreers so much that it left the child feeling under attended to, or lack of time and attention, leaving af eeling of lack of love, leading to feelings that are presented by venus square saturn in their life.

thats juts an example of how astrology works, in my opinion and experience that is.

posted February 08, 2011 01:30 PM            

Sometimes you can be in a relationship with someone who mutually loves you, and still FEEL caught in that trap, as if destiny for lovelessness is your life-story. It feels impossible to get help that really helps (that's the Capricorn), but desperate for help at the same time (Cancer.)

I am Cap rising, Saturn-Moon conjunct in Cancer in the 7th...I am also 36, so a lot of what's going on with us right now has been transiting Pluto-Saturn square putting a chokehold on this axis...I've had Saturn on my Pluto, squaring transiting pluto on my ascendent opposite my Saturn. Pluto wants us to transform and break out of the chains that are hurting us on this axis, I think....so that instead of coming at relationships (or lack thereof) from a place of neediness or pain, we will manifest the positive aspects of it--long-lasting relationship (Cap) and nurturing (Cancer.)

That FEELING--"everyone else has love and all my loves are one-sided and I'm the loneliest kid in the playground"--is all about Cap-Cancer.

Lots of people could be in the same situation as I am and not attach that emotional quality to it.

posted February 08, 2011 02:02 PM            

Some info on cap dsc (various sources, sorry - it's from a former group on msn):

The opposite sign of Capricorn will be found on the 7th house cusp, and evokes those
qualities which balance the extremes of Cancer. Those with Cancer rising may be
flooded and swept away by upsurges of emotion and feeling, but maintaining a
relationship demands that they discriminate between which emotions are appropriate
and useful and which should be filtered or kept under control. Through partnership, a
structure (Capricorn) is built, into which the otherwise random and chaotic feelings
of Cancer can flow. They may enact their own need to achieve in the world through
helping another person to become successful and established (Capricorn on the 7th).
With this placement, a partner who will offer security, strength and stability is
sought. At some point, however, Cancer rising will need to find these qualities from
within, rather than importing others to provide them.

Childhood is a tremendously traumatic time for one with Cancer rising. The rising
sign is related to the 'orphan' complex. Whether the individual was really orphaned
or not is irrelevant; he feels orphaned and abandoned early on, and his emotional
coloring starts right then. He feels a distinct lack of mothering and tender loving care
from childhood. My Cancer-rising daughter Diane recalled an incident during a
regression session that clarified many of her childhood reactions. In that session, she
went back to the age of five months, when she was sick and in the hospital. She
recalled seeing me standing above her, seeming to ignore her fears by not picking
her up and holding her close. She said she was scared and needed to be held. When I
kept my distance, she decided right then that I didn't love her. She felt, and decided
to act, like an outsider in our family for much of her childhood. The recollection of
this incident was a revelation to both of us, and I was grateful for an opportunity to
present the 'facts' of that moment. Her grandfather was the Chief of Staff of the
hospital and the fashion of his day was not to let mothers stay with their babies. His
words were: 'Hysterical mothers have no business being around sick children'. That
moment she recalled took place when she was in the nursery undergoing a blood
transfusion. I was behind a plate-glass window, with my heart in my mouth, watching
her, aching to take her in my arms to comfort her. There was no fighting the boss,
however, and I was sent home, knowing it was the wrong thing to do. What Diane
didn't photograph was my feelings. She only saw my actions. Her behavior during her
childhood certainly reflected the decision she had made about my love. Fortunately
she has no doubts about that love now, but her childhood was made more difficult
because of this early reaction. I, in my state of unawareness, did not think to talk to
her, at five months, to explain what was going on. She said that many times after
that, when she felt particularly alone or abandoned, she would think of that incident
and feel better almost immediately. The deprivation of touch at that critical and
traumatic time of life has affected her whole life. It is interesting to not that the
sensitive area for one with Cancer rising is the stomach and digestion. Diane was in
the hospital because she was having trouble digesting food and was not receiving
enough nourishment. The actual first memory of feeling abandoned could have come
with my inability to nurse her for very long. Again, an example of oral needs
connected with this rising sign.

It appears that what one with this ascendant is looking for in a marriage is security.
His own emotional swings keep him coming and going, so when he finds a person
who appears to be stable, reliable, and responsible, that person represents the
security he feels he needs. If Saturn is well aspected in the chart, it will be a serene
and stable marriage, but if Saturn is badly aspected, the likelihood is that the
marriage can be heavy, restricting, and limiting. Many times, a heavy Saturn in the
chart can indicate an inherent fear or marriage. It is as if the individual sense the
restrictions connected with partnership. It is especially important to examine the
relationship to see where the limitation will end and the sense of stability will begin.
If it is well-aspected, Saturn is the planet that indicates responsibility, practicality,
and steadfastness. It can represent the parent type, who is there to give a solid base,
be supportive and responsible. In its positive sense, the one with Cancer rising can
act as the mother and the partner will assume the father role, the disciplinarian. If
Saturn is not well aspected, however, it represents one who is insecure, overly
cautious, and judgemental instead of supportive. The Cancer rising can find himself
in a limiting, restrictive partnership with someone cold and unresponsive, hardly
what he needs to ensure security.
The Kabbalists liken Saturn to the 'playpen' Mother Nature puts her children in. That
playpen can be important for the safety of the child early on, but later it can be
restrictive and limiting. Safety can also be fun, so the person with a Cancer
ascendant must be sure there are plenty of toys in his playpen to keep him happy. He
needs to look for someone who is responsible without being overly conservative. A
'proper' person, but fun-loving. He must be careful not to let the prospect of a sturdy
family tree keep him from looking at the realistic potential of the individual. He wants
a heavyweight, but one that will act as a supportive agent, not a limiting one.
The most important facet of the partner to be aware of is a strong sense of self-worth.
If that person is sure of himself or herself, the support in the marriage is fantastic. It
will be long-lasting and comfortable - a 'forever' situation. But if the partner has
insecurities, he will tend to keep the one with Cancer rising tied to the limitations he
feels in himself. He will convince the Cancer rising that he can't live without the
partnership, whereas in fact it is the partner that can't live without the energy of one
with Cancer rising. This person, the partner, will act like a rock, stuck in the mud at
the shoreline, keeping one with the Cancer ascendant tied up, rather than acting as a
stabilizing anchor. A rock creates its own little whirlpool, pulling things to its own
stuck place. Unless he is very careful, the one with Cancer rising is sometimes easily
pulled in by negative strokes, negative messages, and negative situations. Since he is
so sensitive, he needs to be aware of the first judgemental message he hears from
one he is interested in. He will never be able to do anything about anohter person's
feelings of self-worth; all he can do is take care of his own. He needs to understand
what he has to give in a partnership situation and look for someone who truly
appreciates him. He must guard against a desire to rescue; a rock will remain a rock
as long as its behavior produces the desired results. The Cancer rising will have to
deal with his mothering instincts most carefully in this instance. He may have to
consider that marriage may be his own way of keeping himself safe and in the
playpen. If he is willing to assume responsibility for his own happiness and life, he
ultimately attracts to his side one who is protective and who is desirous of fulfilling
the same sense of destiny and duty on a humanitarian level as Cancer rising.
Together they can act as 'mother and father' on a profound level, being mutually
supportive and nurturing to each other and to mankind.

posted February 08, 2011 02:36 PM            

One Cancer rising has Saturn between 5th/6th house cusps, Saturn sits on her Sun. She started noticing guys pretty late too, I think she was 19 at the time when she realized... "Huh?.. someone has a crush on me? I didn't notice lol." She's currently married with kids.

Other Cancer riser with Saturn Singleton in 7th has been dating since she grew breasts. Lol, the power of breasts has drew many guys to her till she met her now long term bf. Happily together with a daughter.

Another Cancer riser has Saturn in 4th, squaring Venus in 7th. He dated lots of women, especially older, currently settled down and has a kid with his gf.

posted February 08, 2011 04:18 PM            

But why not try to be friends first with some women? Not just ones you're attracted to, but ones you like and respect in a friendship way. That'll help you get used to being intimate and open with women and deepening a connection, and may change the vibes you respond to. It's not about the "level" someone's at...each human is a completely unique individual. It's about finding someone who really fits with you and inspires you.

My ex thought I was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen (he wasn't just flattering me, he talked to other people about it after we split up), and that he would never have anyone that beautiful. And lots of people would not see me that way at all...it was just the way I fit with *him* that made him feel that. (0 degree conjunction of his Venus to my Sun, among other things.) People aren't in leagues or levels.

posted February 08, 2011 04:31 PM            

Just briefly, I am also a Cancer rising, Cap on the Descendant, with Saturn squaring my Sun in the 5th (which has so far sucked the fun out of everything 5th house represents, including the fun side of relationships).

A good astrologer once told me that Cappy on the descendant means that on a subconscious level, you keep your ideal relationships as something that is always 'in the future', a goal to strive for, something to work towards, an ambition of sorts - but never in the present. You basically don't consider where you are at in life right now to be 'worthy' of a happy relationship. It's something that will come along when you feel great about yourself one day and all your dreams will have come true and you'll be exactly who you want to be, and THEN conveniently at the time suitable to you, your perfect soul-mate will magically slot into your life. I know it doesn't feel like this to you because you want that good r'ship now, but what we manifest around us speaks VOLUMES, and it's not based on our intentions at all. In reality, people come into your life when you're f***ed up, and hate yourself, and that person usually exposes you to yourself, and you blame them somehow, and off it goes....

I understand you, because I share the same tendency for thinking this way, but I've also realized is that with Cappy on the Descendant, we want to feel those bells and whistles, but our lesson astrologically is that even that is tied to CHOICE, and it will not come to us without some difficulty. We may not be astrologically destined to see 'the one' and have 'the one' see us, and then just be one of those happy soul-mated couples that never had a doubt and bounced into the perfect relationship. Astrologically, we have to work harder, I really do believe that, so don't resist your nature in that respect, but build your character through awareness and choices.

Maira was very right with: "If Saturn is badly aspected, the likelihood is that the
marriage can be heavy, restricting, and limiting. Many times, a heavy Saturn in the
chart can indicate an inherent fear or marriage. It is as if the individual sense the restrictions connected with partnership."

This was totally my relationship with someone who was crazy about me and could have perfectly well been my life partner, but I just felt soooo heavy and restricted and am looking (and still looking) for that spark that I want to feel.

So yeah...I totally get you, but understand that you're not doomed to never find the one, but you are being astrologically asked to work harder within yourself around the area of relationships, and take your 'awareness' as a blessing, not a curse.

posted February 08, 2011 06:46 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by A_L_F:

I've noticed that yes I attract women, but I don't attract 'the one'. Everyone else seems to have the one. Why not me? Is it Saturn. Whenever a girl really likes me I'm not so into her, and whenever i'm really into a girl she's not so into me.

---

I once dated a Cancer ASC. and this was exactly the dynamic, in fact he told me I just wasn't the "one."

posted February 08, 2011 08:01 PM            

Somewhere down the yellow brick road between your Cancer AC and Cap DC --- you seem to have forgotten who you are.

Sort out the beef - you'll be happy.
Be happy - you'll attract love.

posted February 09, 2011 12:04 AM            

Betty Boop is right...it's not the Cancer-Cap axis in and of itself, it's the incompatibility between being a happy, lusty fire sign and the watery seriousness of that ASC-DSC axis.

In your case, your enormous Sag stellium probably doesn't even want to settle down--it just wants to romp around getting laid. And then your Leo Moon is very status-conscious, in a different way than your Capricorn DSC is status conscious. The status-consciousness doesn't go that well with the adventurous Sag, which likes all flavors.

That Leo/Cap combination is hard (I have it with Sun/ASC)--your mate has to totally impress you and live up to your status ideals. I'm trying to follow my Sag NN and be more adventurous and open-minded, seeing who I really feel attracted to whether or not he has all the fancy qualities I usually go for. In your case, the Sag is a huge stellium.