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Author Topic:   Capricorn loyalty?
starfox
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posted March 13, 2011 06:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for starfox     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My loyalty to situations and people is my undoing sometimes.

I should walk away and leave but I stay and it is always me who ends up being hurt more than them.

Is this a common theme for other Capricorns.?

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cappy1277
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posted March 13, 2011 07:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yep....but I don't think its so much loyalty as it is a fear of failure.

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starfox
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posted March 13, 2011 07:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for starfox     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by cappy1277:
Yep....but I don't think its so much loyalty as it is a fear of failure.

Yes that too!

I 'know' things can be better, but the other person is often not prepared to put in the effort I am.

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cappy1277
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posted March 13, 2011 07:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Saturn is representative of reaping the benefits of hard work, so we work,work,work & thinking eventually we'll see the light at the end of the tunnel when all along its been an illusion. To have to do it over again- whether its a job, a relationship- seems hopeless. But us capricorns are late bloomers and it does get easier as you get older.

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starfox
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posted March 13, 2011 08:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for starfox     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by cappy1277:
Saturn is representative of reaping the benefits of hard work, so we work,work,work & thinking eventually we'll see the light at the end of the tunnel when all along its been an illusion. To have to do it over again- whether its a job, a relationship- seems hopeless. But us capricorns are late bloomers and it does get easier as you get older.

Yeah..The times I've built a structure only to have it kicked away like a sandcastle & then to start again..
I'm 42 now and it seems still so far to begin again after the latest crash.

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aethan
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posted March 13, 2011 09:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for aethan     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A close friend of mine is a Capricorn sun and what I notice is she tends to expect people to behave in a certain way and when they (eventually) don't, she becomes disappointed in them. It probably doesn't help that she can't read people well, she's stubborn and one of the most pessimistic people I know (she always insists she's a realist but I gotta lol).

She expects too much of people, she forgets no one is infallible and, above of all, that she isn't infallible either.

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shedevil77
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posted March 13, 2011 09:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for shedevil77     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This has been an ongoing theme in all of my relationships. My venus in aquarius often makes it hard for me to settle down. But when I do, my cancer moon and cappie sun makes me extremely loyal. I've literally stayed in relationships where I felt resentful and almost hating the person. But not wanting to leave because I didn't want them to think I gave up on "us" and because I didn't wanna have to admit to myself that it wasn't working. That partially why I'm so hesitant to get married. If things ever went sour. I would have to be unhappy for an unusually long time to leave IF I leave at all. I'm not weak AT all, but I hate to give up even when there is no other option

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 13, 2011 09:54 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Actually, my best friend is a capricorn and very loyal. Out of all my friends she's the one who's stuck by and always always been there. As a Cancer, I highly appreciate that, and her. No matter how passionate a friendship with my leo friend is, or how fun and playful my friendship with an aquarius is, I know she will always be my BEST friend because I KNOW she's always got MY back and my best interests at heart, sometimes even above her own. Some people don't appreciate that, but I believe the feminine signs do.

I'm a cancer and I also suffer from the same illness lol, I'm very loyal to people but some people could care less, especially air signs (except for geminis, I've found them to be true sweethearts).

The thing me and my capricorn friend have in common is, well, besides everything, that we both like people who are nice and seem to be independent thinkers and not followers of society. We also both have very high moral standards. I know she's at a loss for having the "play it off by making a joke" trait or "making the best of a situation by seeing it as something funny or positive" trait, but I completely trust in her judgement of people because it's always been right in my experience. Whenever she tells me she doesn't like some new friend of mine, she turns out to be right about them! Holy cheese! I feel like she leads the way as far as judgement goes while I help her express her emotions better. Yet, she's actually very passive.

I do feel our friendship can be somewhat stifling sometimes since she is so sensitive and reserved most of the time. And also she speaks in a monotone voice, which makes me feel pretty bored and emotionless lol. But we have a lot of fun together and it's great when she smiles (I feel like I've lightened her up). She is usually somewhat depressed. She can be a hard person to deal with because 1. she is so sensitive 2. she doesn't have much tact or that much social grace and 3. she can be very demanding, stubborn, and bossy. But I know she's a sweetheart and those are all defense mechanisms, and yes she usually is a sweetheart, and she is fun i can tell she is trying to be though she usually seems depressed, the most important thing I need to know is that she really cares.

So just know that some people will not appreciate you as a capricorn, but others will, particularly the water signs and especially other earth signs.\

However, just to let you know, I wouldn't choose an earth or air sign for a relationship because I would want a relationship to be passionate, and don't appreciate the constant brake that earth signs put on expressing emotions

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cappy1277
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posted March 13, 2011 10:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
i have come to realize though that when you keep going through the same things, there is something that you are missing- a lesson that needs to be learned that you keep passing up. I remember watching Oprah one day a while ago and while I can't exactly remember verbatim what she had said- You keep jumping over hurdle over hurdle to get to that lesson and when you keep missing that lesson, eventually you hit a brick wall. I can totally relate...when I feel like a failure has occurred I've learned to slow down and think about it...it may be my gemini moon but I am not as impulsive as I was when I was younger.

As far as earth signs not being as passionate- i disagree....
My SO and I are both capricorns & I have to say that we are a very passionate couple. More reserved on the outside to people looking at us but deep down inside- its volcanic.

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 13, 2011 10:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
not saying earth signs arent passionate....guess it's kinda hard to explain
but yeah you gotta admit you guys do keep a reserve on expressing your emotions. I think you guys are very passionate on the inside, but my experience is i don't have the patience to break through and get them to lose their reserve and be as passionate as i want. It's easier to go for a fire or water sign where i don't have to work at it lol.

I learned in my life though that you shouldn't analyze so much. You shouldn't be like "uh-oh, there is a lesson i need to learn, this is why this keeps happening to me." You should be that way when it comes to life decisions and such but not when it comes to people. People will stop liking you whenever they want, and it's not something you're doing wrong. As long as you're trying to be a nice person you shouldn't worry about it and just have fun with the people you are friends with, even if they're few. And eventually trust me you'll make more, and besides most friends arent friends forever anyway.

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cappy1277
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posted March 13, 2011 10:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by RunAroundScreaming:
not saying earth signs arent passionate....guess it's kinda hard to explain
but yeah you gotta admit you guys do keep a reserve on expressing your emotions. I think you guys are very passionate on the inside, but my experience is i don't have the patience to break through and get them to lose their reserve and be as passionate as i want. It's easier to go for a fire or water sign where i don't have to work at it lol.

I learned in my life though that you shouldn't analyze so much. You shouldn't be like "uh-oh, there is a lesson i need to learn, this is why this keeps happening to me." You should be that way when it comes to life decisions and such but not when it comes to people. People will stop liking you whenever they want, and it's not something you're doing wrong. As long as you're trying to be a nice person you shouldn't worry about it and just have fun with the people you are friends with, even if they're few. And eventually trust me you'll make more, and besides most friends arent friends forever anyway.


I agree with what you are saying but sometimes when you keep going through the same thing over and over and over again...you have to wonder what is keeping this cycle going? You shouldn't over-analyze every situation you get you get yourself into but if its the 4th or 5th time...its time for some self analysis and self help. You don't always want to be attracting the loser or working the dead end job with low prospects. You have to make some changes with in yourself to make things happen.

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 13, 2011 10:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That's true.

I'm just saying as far as loyalty and people go (which is what the original thread topic was about) this is my opinion:


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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 13, 2011 10:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
And you can't change yourself, as much as you may think you can.

Trying to change yourself will only bring frustration lol.

Life experiences will change, you, not yourself. You can't force something that life experience hasn't taught you. Just live life.

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cappy1277
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posted March 13, 2011 10:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
thats what I meant...not in the sense that you compromise your personality...lol

that's the best quote and I can relate to it. But sometimes you wonder why that person appeared in your life. like this quote:

"when the student is ready, the teacher will appear"

great article explaining the quote- http://hubpages.com/hub/When-the-student-is-ready-the-teacher-will-appear

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JohnFKennedy
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posted March 13, 2011 11:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for JohnFKennedy     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Whoa, shedevil77, would you mind expanding on your view of relationships a little bit more? I'm currently dating a Capricorn sun/Cancer moon/Venus in Aquarius.

He was in a relationship for 3 years, and EVERYONE thought they were going to get married, their families loved each other, they would throw parties for the couple together, etc. But one day he just brutually left her, and it was obvious that resentment had built up for the longest time that all that adoration turned into a long standing hatred, and he hasn't been in a relationship since!

I feel that being ruled by Saturn is such a burden for Capricorn folks. That is a planet with very little mercy and rarely does it offer any down time for some fun unless you got some significant fire in your chart. It really is a tireless sign in every sense of the word.

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 13, 2011 11:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think we are definitely drawn to people from whom we have something to learn from. I can clearly tell you what I've learned from the people I've chosen to make friends with, and even if the friendship eventually ends because they get tired of me for whatever reason (which is usually the case by the way when two very different people who have much to teach each other come together, one grows tired of the other because they are just so different and have different needs and outlooks).

I am always drawn to people who have a lot to teach me and who as a result, are very different from me (air and masculine signs usually), and eventually, when they're tired of teaching me and see that i don't change the way i am, and that we really are very different (they see i'm emotional and insecure and that cramps their style and their need for freedom) but in the end i come out a much better person...much less insecure, and much more able to handle my emotions because i learned valuable skills from them. I learned to become more like them through all their advice and through getting to hear and see from them how they think and approach things.

So, I don't think it's so much that a teacher shows up when the student is ready, but just that we are attracted to people who we admire, and we admire them because they have some important skills to teach us. Usually relationships are somewhat one-sided and one person is more loyal than the other because one deeply admires the other and the other appreciates it and likes having someone around who can appreciate them and join in the fun.

Eventually, I think you become more and more the person you want to be in this way.

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cappy1277
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posted March 13, 2011 11:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think we are saying the same thing but differently...lol

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 13, 2011 11:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think so, too! Lol. Nevermind.

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 13, 2011 11:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I just think it's kinda confusing to say the teacher shows up when the student is ready because the teacher has always been there. That makes it sound like it's hocus pocus law of attraction nonsense mumbo jumbo lol. So i like the teacher shows up when the student notices, and they notice when they are ready to learn. LOL !

::facepalm:: nevermind. haha.

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cappy1277
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posted March 13, 2011 11:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@runaroundscreaming:
cthu...lol!!

JFK- I don't have an cancer moon but I do have an aquarius venus...we make detachment an artform. we can go through all the motions but never really be there which makes it easy for us to walk away. Emotional investment is hard for us.

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 14, 2011 01:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Lololol jesuschristsupastaw
Just one of those things lol

the law of attraction = blegh.

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AcousticGod
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posted March 14, 2011 01:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for AcousticGod     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Still pondering on this. I do think it's a reasonable possibility for Capricorns.

I guess I feel a bit removed from this idea, because I don't get too wrapped up in situations or people for the most part. I'm very social with my Gemini Rising, and Sagittarian stellium, but I guess I've gone fairly long without any sort of codependence/intimacy that the idea of my loyalty undoing me seems faint. If I were on more intimate terms with someone, then, yes, I could see it happening, but I do try to be realistic, and I do try to keep an eye on the writing on the wall. I guess I watch my expectations. Keep them in line with what I think is reasonable to expect.

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starzy54
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posted March 14, 2011 03:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for starzy54     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I can't speak for other cappys,but i can speak for myself.I have a cap sun and cap rising.

I am loyal to a fault.I stick around and help people for way too long.You know the term "teach a man to fish?" Well I taught them all to fish,but still wake up early and fish for them myself.I take the blunt of all the responsibility around me,and leave very little for everyone to do.Eventually they forget how to take care of themselves and i am stuck to help them even longer.

I mother my own mother..take care of my siblings like they are my own children,and put aside all my emotions and needs.(makes my fiance very angry,since he needs me,but i am always unavailable helping the ones who don't know how to fish.)
I balance in my mind and calculate who needs help more..my fiance always comes last to me
which is not good,and i prioritize who needs love and advice and leadership the most.those people get the blunt of all my loyalty.and its really taking away more happiness than it gives me,but i do it anyway

Saturn..boy oh boy

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RunAroundScreaming
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posted March 14, 2011 04:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for RunAroundScreaming     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Awww...tear!!
That is too sweet

Wow....

But "Teach a man how to fish" and he will be able to do it all by himself! It is not healthy for u to make people dependent on you either, you know? Think of whats better for both you and the other person. Everyone feels much better when they can do it themselves. And if you are babying them, constantly and over and over, they could very well just be thinking you enjoy it, if they are good well-meaning people who are not just using you. They might enjoy being babied but it will hurt them to find out u actually RESENT them for it!

Nobody wants to use anyone when they dont wanna do it....at least nobody with a good heart (which most ppl have a good heart). They would prob feel somewhat betrayed to find out u didnr actually wanna help em. So, think......what is best fr both u and for them? What would u BOTH want....? The answer is that you teach them how to fish ...you give them the tools to do it and let them fall on their arse themselves and make their own mistakes because that is the learning process! Nobody can be happy without learning from their mistakes too once in a while...it's what makes anyone feel independent, wise, and strong. You gotta realize, it's neither healthy for you nor for them.

Making mistakes is also a part of experiencing joy! You cant have joy without knowing what pain is first!

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cappy1277
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From: philadelphia,pa
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posted March 14, 2011 06:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for cappy1277     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
And that's one of the lessons in life I have learned. Not to have expectations or at least keep them to a minimum so that I can't be disappointed. I'll let you all know how that works out for me in the future...lol

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