posted June 25, 2011 03:22 PM            

Anyway, when I think about it, there could be various reasons as to how someone is a player. First of all, it is always my impression that those men are players but the question is are they really? They could be using me and playing me around, but they might be completely in love with the next girl and would not think about hurting her. Does that still mean they are players, then? To me it doesn't, if that is the case I will just write it off as a subjective, one-off personal experience which has probably more to do with our synastry than with the man's own personality.

If the "playing" seems to be recurrent, then of course the man is a player. But in all fairness, I usually don't know certain men long enough to gather information about his pervious relationship habits (few exceptions excluded, of course) so I really can't be the judge of whether or not those men are players.

I know... I think too much. On the other hand, I do know that I am very vulnerable to attracting players or men who aren't sincere with me. I might have my Venus/Neptune conjunction to thank for that. Among other things, it makes me a hopeless romantic and/or a romantic idealist. So I tend to attract players, but I think that if something in the man's chart aspects my Venus/Neptune, he can become a one-off "player" and only with me... because I allow it to happen. It is quite easy to fall into behavioural traps like that, people often behave the way that others expect them to, or behave in a way which they started off the "relationship" (any kind of relationship, that is, not just romantic) and find it hard to deviate from that path. So if a man's Sun conjuncts my Neptune and I aquire an idealized image of him despite the fact that he might not treat me as well as I should be treated, that might signal to him that it's okay to play me around and even if it's not in his nature, he might not be able to change that once it's established.

Right... I hope that still made sense, because I'm sensing I'm becoming quite the verbal waterfall again.

posted June 25, 2011 03:52 PM            

The last "affair" I had was with a man whose Mercury was on my Venus/Neptune. Interestingly, my Mercury/Uranus/Asc was on his Neptune, which also meant that his Neptune was opposed to my Moon. Throughout the affair I had the feeling that he had no idea what he wanted and/or that he was just playing with me. Side note: I consider being involved with someone all the time not knowing what you want only to come to the conclusion afterwards that that person is what you wanted, "playing" as well. It hurts the other person and it plants some bad seeds in the ground of the "relationship".

Eventually he decided he wanted someone other than me, again giving me the impression that he was just leading me on and that he either really didn't know what he wanted from me at that time or was just lying about what he said he felt. Either way, I think it's a good example of how the synastry can cause for a "one-off" "player" (I'm using quotation marks here because the terms one-off and player are both relative, but in different ways - the person could be a more-than-one-off player but not constantly, and it could be my impression that he is a player, but since my impression is inherently subjective, it doesn't mean he is a player). There were clear signs that this was not a healthy relationship, and Neptune might have had something to do with it. But as you say, it can work both ways. Neptune is the planet of deception as well as idealisation or imagination and dreams. It could as easily have been an ideal connection rather than a deceptive one.

On the other hand, in this man's case, I had been able to gather some information of his previous relationships and it does seem as though he had made a habit out of playing women around - not necessarily in terms of sleeping around with others in the mean time, but he did seem to have a habit of acting inappropriately and still being able to blame the woman for his behaviour, which is exactly what he did with me as well. In that respect, I think I could safely call him a player, just not strictly in the sense that he sleeps around.

But that's just one example. Of all the other men who had clearly been playing me, I don't really have charts, and it is also very hard to ascertain whether they were chronic players or whether it was just one-off and with me. The above example was the only one I knew off the top of my head because it was recent. The other men whose charts I know very well, I simply never had the impression that they were players... rather that in some of the cases, that I was the player rather than the man in question (two exes spring to mind there, both had a connection between their Asc/Dsc axis and my Pluto, by the way... ) and with most men... well, I simply don't know.

There are a few cases which could arguably have been players, but I'll have to look at their charts and our synastry again. So bear with me

posted June 25, 2011 04:57 PM            

I can easily give a lot of examples where both planets can work both ways towards being played/player (I'm looking at the synastry between my ex and I now, where it was really a game of back-and-forth playing. He played me, I played him, he took advantage of me, I took advantage of him, all in different ways), but could I suggest that Saturn plays a role, too? Saturn in synastry could suggest a disappointment, which could point to being a player who disappoints the one who's being played?

posted June 26, 2011 09:59 AM            

Well I guess they kind of are the same thing.

This is rare, but some players are open about being a player...like my friend's older brother.

And then there are those other guys that are lame that think 'if I have a girlfriend, that means that she is obligated to give me some' Well thats the game technique they use for girls that look like "good girls"

I can't stand guys like that. It's useally very easy for me to see through them.

posted June 26, 2011 01:43 PM            

However, I have only cheated on someone twice in my life. In fact, it is amazingly tiring for me to have two men in my life at the same time and I'm just very likely to "trade one in for the other", in a sense.

So, what I want to share is that even when someone has a certain "cheating" placement, it doesn't mean they are cheaters - or even players. I don't believe that every man who has Uranus square Venus, or a mutable Dsc, or even Jupiter conjunct Venus, is going to be a cheater without fail. I think it's perfectly possible to not give in to any "cheater"-placement if for some or other reason, you don't feel right doing it. Even if it is in your nature.

posted June 28, 2011 01:19 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aya_and_baby:
Jupiter in the 7th could suggest multiple partners

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posted June 28, 2011 02:44 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aya_and_baby:
I'll be honest... With a Sagittarius venus and a Gemini 7th house, not to mention all the other mutable influences I have and a Sun which is supposed to be über-loyal hidden away in the 12th house... you can imagine I'm inherently not the most loyal of people. Even though I don't exactly have Uranus square Venus

However, I have only cheated on someone twice in my life. In fact, it is amazingly tiring for me to have two men in my life at the same time and I'm just very likely to "trade one in for the other", in a sense.

So, what I want to share is that even when someone has a certain "cheating" placement, it doesn't mean they are cheaters - or even players. I don't believe that every man who has Uranus square Venus, or a mutable Dsc, or even Jupiter conjunct Venus, is going to be a cheater without fail. I think it's perfectly possible to not give in to any "cheater"-placement if for some or other reason, you don't feel right doing it. Even if it is in your nature.

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I don't see cheating on sb 'only twice' is sth to be proud about? Whether someone cheats once, or 10 times doesn't matter, clearly you fall under the 'not very loyal' category lol.

posted January 18, 2013 11:41 PM            

quote:

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Anyway, when I think about it, there could be various reasons as to how someone is a player. First of all, it is always my impression that those men are players but the question is are they really? They could be using me and playing me around, but they might be completely in love with the next girl and would not think about hurting her. Does that still mean they are players, then? To me it doesn't, if that is the case I will just write it off as a subjective, one-off personal experience which has probably more to do with our synastry than with the man's own personality.

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posted January 18, 2013 11:44 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DayandNight21:
Ok
I love Joss Stone's song 'The Player' it really keeps a female sane! Also Flashdance song (not the one what a feeling!).
So what do you thing makes for a relationship player, aspects, signs, patterns, stelliums? Do you have any examples? There are players so it may help to pinpoint the 'elements' (play on words) involved.

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