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Author
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Topic: Social awkwardness in chart
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britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 02:48 PM
  
I am extremely awkward talking to people, even people I've known for a long time and know personal things about me. When I talk to people, I put on a softer voice, awkward mannerisms, and a childish demeanor. I can't think strait, and I do not feel like myself. I don't do it on purpose, and I would MUCH rather be myself. People tend to think I am weak and silly and stupid, and I am not any of these. Any indication in my chart as to why I am like this, what the blockages are, and how I can get past it? Thank you in advance. This is a huge obstacle in my life.  IP: Logged |
RedScorp
Knowflake Posts: 230
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 02:56 PM
I dunno what thread it was, but I read somewhere Venus conjunct Mars is a sign of awkwardness.IP: Logged |
cancercaite
Newflake Posts: 17
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 02:58 PM
I feel for you cause I do the same, I put on a softer voice, act awkwardly and have dodgy eye contact aswell, I know that I am terribly awkward and I know how it feels, like your acting as someone else but you have no choice, I also have a scorpio moon but I doubt that everyone with a scorpio moon has these traits although I do think maybe it can make you more awkward I don't know why that could be but thats just me maybe everyone elses experience is different. So I don't know hat else it could be but I notice you have a lot of aquarius in you maybe you could look into that My ascendant is aquarius I think it makes me more detached and gives me difficulty in relating well to others, knowing whos my friend that kind of stuff.
CaiteXxx#IP: Logged |
cancercaite
Newflake Posts: 17
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 02:58 PM
I feel for you cause I do the same, I put on a softer voice, act awkwardly and have dodgy eye contact aswell, I know that I am terribly awkward and I know how it feels, like your acting as someone else but you have no choice, I also have a scorpio moon but I doubt that everyone with a scorpio moon has these traits although I do think maybe it can make you more awkward I don't know why that could be but thats just me maybe everyone elses experience is different. So I don't know hat else it could be but I notice you have a lot of aquarius in you maybe you could look into that My ascendant is aquarius I think it makes me more detached and gives me difficulty in relating well to others, knowing whos my friend that kind of stuff.
CaiteXxxIP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 03:11 PM
I know what you mean on the dodgy eye contact also, cancercaite. I feel so uncomfortable with my inability to give good eye contact, that I really overcompensate! A lot of the time, I'll unintentionally just stare someone down and make them feel extremely uncomfortable, visibly so. I don't know HOW to casually do eye contact. Eyes are very intense for me anyway, as they truly are the windows to the soul. I feel a super intense connection to people when I look them strait in the eye, so it makes me uncomfortable. I translate that to people when I talk to them and I come across as really freaking weird. lol I know I do.IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 03:14 PM
Is it the Saturn so close to my ascendant? Could that cause that feeling of inhibition?IP: Logged |
BelligerentPygmy
Knowflake Posts: 326
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 03:14 PM
It's because you have Uranus in the 1st. IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 03:18 PM
Please elaborate, BP. I know Uranus in the first would make my personality in line with Uranus.. weird and kooky and offbeat... but how would it make me so inhibited and awkward, unable to express my true self at all to people?Thank you for the replies so far. IP: Logged |
BelligerentPygmy
Knowflake Posts: 326
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 03:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by britterfly:
Please elaborate, BP. I know Uranus in the first would make my personality in line with Uranus.. weird and kooky and offbeat... but how would it make me so inhibited and awkward, unable to express my true self at all to people?Thank you for the replies so far.
Because on some level you might be hyper-aware that you're kinda different from most people and so you immediately feel ill at ease around them and worry about how you're coming across and what they might be thinking about you; especially if you've had people actually give you a hard time about being off-beat. IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 03:26 PM
Uranus in the 1st HouseYou actually embody the qualities of Uranus so you give off an electrically charged aura, which can either be stimulating or shocking - depending on your overall personality. Sparks of genius and eccentricity fly off you. You have a sharp awareness of your very existence, which can amount to being a testament to the uniqueness of the individual or to just being downright odd. You can inspire or move the masses; or just be plain awkward, clumsy and disruptive. Your physical appearance is probably unusual or arresting in some way too. Freedom and rights can become a valid or distorting issue for you, expressed as being stubbornly rebellious just for the sake of it, or as a reformer who actually makes radical changes to the world around you. In any case, you should first reform your own attitudes or be prepared to be drastically transformed yourself in the process. You are astoundingly intuitive at times - laying bare pseudo or subtle personality traits in others with great precision and sang-froid. Indeed, your intuition is your leading edge and may well find a fruitful expression in psychology, astrology, science and technology, etc. You are also inventive; in essence, I would say that you are inventing your very self. ^^^ that is definitely me. I suppose I am ashamed of what makes me unusual, and people who get to know me usually have mean things to say to me about being "weird" or strange, even though there isn't anything grotesque or perverted about my personality. I get called "crazy" very, very often, even though I am perfectly coherent and have a fine grasp on reality. I consider myself to have a free mind, something I've noticed most people lack and behave as dumb sheep all their lives. IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 03:28 PM
You're spot on BP. Thank you.IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 03:35 PM
Neptune in the first house also applies to me. I turn in to whomever I am in the company of. Finishing other people's sentences and voicing what people are thinking is a regular habit. When I am dating someone or hanging around them, I just about completely turn in to that person. I felt there was something wrong with me til I read this: sagittarius Neptune in the 1st House The sensitive issue with you is your very identity. The impression that others get from you is the one that they unconsciously fear or wish for. This is because you are adept at moulding yourself to embody whatever they expect of you. Meanwhile, your own sense of identity proves rather elusive. Another pitfall to watch out for is your susceptibility for seeing things as you want to see them. These difficulties arise because you are seeing everything and everyone as an extension of yourself. Consequently, you get caught up in living out the myths of other people. This can take the form of being glamorous and mystical, or weak and submissive, or anything else that appeals to people's fantasies. Your eyes themselves seem to match this by having a mysterious or far away quality, or your sight may be weak, or even non-existent - but in any case you may well have the gift of second sight. Indeed it is your psychic sensitivity that's behind all this confusion and enigma. When you as an individual learn to use this sensitivity to tune into something that is really fine and beautiful - as opposed to randomly taking on everyone else's idea of such a thing - then your identity becomes a channel for your ideals, visions and dreams. But in order to do this you would need to rid yourself of the illusions created by having used your clairvoyance merely to please others and gain acceptance for yourself. You can only be truly accepted by others when you have accepted yourself. In order to do this you must train your acute sensitivity through meditation, self-contemplation, or creative activities such as music, drama and dance, or through giving yourself over to some spiritual cause or healing ministry. The point is that you are naturally equipped to identify with, and find your identity through, one or more of these pursuits. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 20701
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 04:08 PM
Scorpio moon in the 12th.I have not read the other comments,so not sure if someone talked about it.
A 12th house planets trumps all for difficulty, according to Sasportas.
Your moon in Scorpio is one of the hardest moons, anyway.The 12th makes you more withdrawn.------------------
Do You Think This Psychic Is Cute?
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
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Lonake
Moderator Posts: 5529
From: U.S.
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted October 04, 2011 04:36 PM
Ruler of the 7th is Mercury in the 3rd square Moon in the 12th. Loose square to Saturn as well.
Saturn conj Asc. Moon conj Saturn. Sun sq Saturn.
Ruler of the 3rd Uranus in the 1st can point to wanting to be known for how you communicate in a unique interesting way so it can feel like a hurdle. Sun in the 3rd also points to communication being emphasized, writing too.IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 04:40 PM
it's my life long dream to be a published author. every time i sit down to write something, i am overwhelmed by huge expectations i put upon myself to be great at it.IP: Logged |
Lotis White
Knowflake Posts: 125
From: USA
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 06:15 PM
Britterfly, I’m surprised no one has even touched on the fact that you have an exact Sun/Moon square yet… conflict between the inner emotional state and the outer mode of self-expression… you identify with being detached, and mentally oriented like an Aquarius but you have a hyper-sensitive, emotional Scorpio Moon… there is a strong undercurrent to you… and it’s like the Aquarius part of you may feel at odds with how intense you can really be…. Squares usually imply tackling a huge challenge in life, but they can be worked with and eventually mastered… perhaps there are some self-help books you can read, or maybe you can join a drama/acting class to help learn how to get your mannerisms and speech tendencies under control… or even something like visualizing yourself as a character in your mind while you are talking or interacting with others may help… like if you do feel too weird about yourself… pretend in your mind that you are Joanne Average for a while and just act accordingly… the more you practice the better you get. A thing that I do when I’m about to do something uncomfortable is think of an aspect in my chart that I like and focus on that in my mind, and think of it operating in my life…like my Saturn/Jupiter sextile for instance… and how it makes official things run smoothly for the most part in my life. In your chart you have a Mercury/Uranus sextile which means that you can be a very interesting conversationalist once you get going (Mercury/Uranus apects are an excellent placement for a writer by the way, and makes for an original writing style that‘s able to capture people’s interest). You also have Jupiter sextile/trine your Asc/Dsc axis, which means you have a pleasant, likeable demeanor which can work in your favor in relating towards others if you take advantage of it. You may be more likeable to some than you realise. And lets not forget your Venus/Mars conjunction… contrary to what was mentioned above I never heard anything about this aspect being connected with awkwardness… it usually tends toward someone having a lot of charisma, and an attractive ’energy’ about them. In your case the Venus/Mars conjunction is quincunx Pluto in Scorpio which again points to feeling uncomfortable with your own intensity at times, but it certainly doesn’t cancel out the charisma of the aspect, and the quincunx is not especially tight anyway. You mentioned Satrurn conjunct your Asc from the 12th house, and it’s true that this placement can create the general feeling of be held back by some bearly understood force… but Saturn also represents high achievement, maturity and dignity… so if your Uranus in the 1st is making you feel too odd somehow, focus on this Saturn energy in your mind to bring about a ‘mature’ demeanor, rather than a child-like one… just think to yourself… this energy is in my chart so it CAN be done, I CAN act ‘mature’ and ‘normal’ and be ‘casual’ with my speech and mannerisms.
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NativelyJoan
Knowflake Posts: 76
From: Boston, MA
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 06:16 PM
quote:
Originally posted by britterfly:
it's my life long dream to be a published author. every time i sit down to write something, i am overwhelmed by huge expectations i put upon myself to be great at it.
With all that Air and Fire in your chart you could do great things. Uranus in the 1st gives you infinite access to a plethora of creative new ideas. You are an idea genius, people might be intimidated by you because you are all kinds of quirky but that's not your problem. Know that whatever you choose to do, if that includes publishing or writing you'll be outstanding at it. I'm dominant Uranus and trust me, once you believe in yourself and stop concerning yourself with the way other people perceive you'll accomplish great things. You'll even be surprised to have developed followers, which is the way those things always go. IP: Logged |
NativelyJoan
Knowflake Posts: 76
From: Boston, MA
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 06:23 PM
Just be careful who you share those ideas with. People always and I mean ALWAYS steal my ideas. I've learned a hard lesson about keeping my Visions to myself. I've indirectly assisted in the growth of many peoples careers by telling them my visions of and for the future. And, it was always the people who thought I was weird who actually ended up stealing my ideas. Interesting, huh. And the funny thing is I would have gladly given them good ideas if they had kindly asked. I have so much going on in my brain with Uranus zapping me every five seconds with a zillion ideas I don't always know what to do with all of them. I'd much rather just share them with people.
IP: Logged |
starcrossedleo
Knowflake Posts: 324
From:
Registered: May 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 07:05 PM
My thought is Chiron in Gemini in the 7th house. Emotional wounds surrounding Communication in relation to others might produce the social awkwardnessIP: Logged |
freebrainstorms
Knowflake Posts: 204
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 07:35 PM
Try to force yourself to go places alone and talk to strangers, make small talk whenever you can to give yourself practice at it, and talk to someone about your life and what makes you feel awkward. It'll be hard at first but there are people that can really help you with this. Anxiety or social awkwardness is a real thing and luckily there are many things that help it. There's books that can really help, try mediation, things that increase your "mindfulness". You just need time, everything's there for you especially with the double fire venus and mars.IP: Logged |
Moonfish
Knowflake Posts: 385
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 07:40 PM
Sun square Moon
Moon square Mercury
Sun square Saturn
are definite signs.IP: Logged |
vertiver
Knowflake Posts: 1467
From: Firey Jupiter
Registered: May 2009
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posted October 04, 2011 09:29 PM
Okay I see a couple of things that might pinpoint it. I always come across as kinda awkward myself and I also have Sag. ASC. with Uranus in the 1st. I think SAG. can be very awkward, think Woody Allen. And Uranus just adds to the nervousness, plus you've got Saturn conjunct the ASC. so people's approval is very important.IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 09:53 PM
I am astonished by the wonderful, kind, extremely helpful and insightful responses you folks have given me. My initial reaction was just "WOW" and I didn't know what else to type. You should understand how much I needed to read what was posted here, as they are all ideas of myself that I would believe in if I had more self-esteem, but rarely do I come across anyone that sees these qualities in me. I am very frustrated, VERY frustrated, because 99 percent of people I befriend or interact with accuse me of all kinds of weirdness. Whatever weirdness or cruelty I am being accused of always seems to be a direct reflection of the accuser. By the time they bust out with the accusations, I already know what they're going to say because I've gotten to know them well enough to know what is sick about them. One girl, who was in her mid twenties and fully supported by her parents, living with them, having her nights out drinking completely sponsored by them, even every pack of cigarettes she smoked was purchased by them, and she was a very mean-spirited person all around, got on the phone to me after several months of friendship to accuse me of having money "pumped" to me by my parents, when I was 19 years old and struggling to maintain a studio apartment on my wages. I'll never forget it because it was the most ridiculously hypocritical, petty accusation. A few months ago, this other girl who I had made friends with who was just a HUGE user - I was constantly finding her doing sneaky little maneuvers and using lots of sweet talk to manipulate people, absolutely BLEW UP at me accusing me of taking advantage of people and taking way more than I give, which I found particularly hurtful as I credited myself in that particular group of people as being extremely generous, giving of my every resource to them, buying food for people who were hungry on a regular basis and going out of my way to get weed just so I could share it with everyone even though I was poor, and I'm a massage therapist and I gave free massages to everyone in that group. My sister is constantly accusing me of exactly things she is doing, and she has been guilty of this for years. She hates me now and refuses to talk to me because she keeps seeing herself in me, even if I have very little to do with her. All she has to do is look at me and the well of accusations springs up. It's easy to tell what's going on in her life by whatever she accuses me of. I am convinced I am a mirror to other people. And it is seriously wearing on my self-esteem. If people are sneaky and in my presence, they accuse me of being sneaky. If they're conceited, I'm conceited. If they're being manipulative, I'm told I'm manipulative. People very often work up huge plots in their minds that they think I am up to. Personally, I am just trying to feel comfortable wherever I am and maybe make a friend. I have to have some serious reasons to be manipulative and mess with people. It's not something I naturally do. I am married to a loving, intelligent, wonderful guy, and I rarely leave our apartment any more because I feel so beat up by people. I don't even want to have friends any more as it's been nothing but hurtful, no matter how much of myself I give and how kind I am. Is it that Neptune so close to my first house???IP: Logged |
britterfly
Knowflake Posts: 521
From:
Registered: Jul 2010
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posted October 04, 2011 10:03 PM
^^^ that sounds super whiney. I guess it is whiney. I just unleashed what I wanted to say to people on to you guys. Basically, I just wanted to thank you guys for the wonderful, beautiful responses. They are seriously going to be helpful to me in my personal development. I am going to write tomorrow.  IP: Logged |
NativelyJoan
Knowflake Posts: 76
From: Boston, MA
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted October 04, 2011 11:56 PM
quote:
Originally posted by britterfly:
I am astonished by the wonderful, kind, extremely helpful and insightful responses you folks have given me. My initial reaction was just "WOW" and I didn't know what else to type. You should understand how much I needed to read what was posted here, as they are all ideas of myself that I would believe in if I had more self-esteem, but rarely do I come across anyone that sees these qualities in me. I am very frustrated, VERY frustrated, because 99 percent of people I befriend or interact with accuse me of all kinds of weirdness. Whatever weirdness or cruelty I am being accused of always seems to be a direct reflection of the accuser. By the time they bust out with the accusations, I already know what they're going to say because I've gotten to know them well enough to know what is sick about them. One girl, who was in her mid twenties and fully supported by her parents, living with them, having her nights out drinking completely sponsored by them, even every pack of cigarettes she smoked was purchased by them, and she was a very mean-spirited person all around, got on the phone to me after several months of friendship to accuse me of having money "pumped" to me by my parents, when I was 19 years old and struggling to maintain a studio apartment on my wages. I'll never forget it because it was the most ridiculously hypocritical, petty accusation. A few months ago, this other girl who I had made friends with who was just a HUGE user - I was constantly finding her doing sneaky little maneuvers and using lots of sweet talk to manipulate people, absolutely BLEW UP at me accusing me of taking advantage of people and taking way more than I give, which I found particularly hurtful as I credited myself in that particular group of people as being extremely generous, giving of my every resource to them, buying food for people who were hungry on a regular basis and going out of my way to get weed just so I could share it with everyone even though I was poor, and I'm a massage therapist and I gave free massages to everyone in that group. My sister is constantly accusing me of exactly things she is doing, and she has been guilty of this for years. She hates me now and refuses to talk to me because she keeps seeing herself in me, even if I have very little to do with her. All she has to do is look at me and the well of accusations springs up. It's easy to tell what's going on in her life by whatever she accuses me of. I am convinced I am a mirror to other people. And it is seriously wearing on my self-esteem. If people are sneaky and in my presence, they accuse me of being sneaky. If they're conceited, I'm conceited. If they're being manipulative, I'm told I'm manipulative. People very often work up huge plots in their minds that they think I am up to. Personally, I am just trying to feel comfortable wherever I am and maybe make a friend. I have to have some serious reasons to be manipulative and mess with people. It's not something I naturally do. I am married to a loving, intelligent, wonderful guy, and I rarely leave our apartment any more because I feel so beat up by people. I don't even want to have friends any more as it's been nothing but hurtful, no matter how much of myself I give and how kind I am. Is it that Neptune so close to my first house???
Friendship issues, lets look at the house of friendships, the 11 house. You've got Pluto there. Here's a brief description about this placement from CafeAstrology: "With Pluto in your 11th House, you may meet many of your power issues within the social sphere, particularly around special interest groups or when dealing with political processes. You're not the women who enjoys sitting on the sidelines if you're part of a group, especially if something could be done more effectively. If you have not developed a strong sense of your own ideals and beliefs you can fall under the influence of others who would usurp your power in order to boost their own. But once you've awakened to your own ideals, drives and directives, you can be a highly influential leader and instigator of social change. The extent of your efforts depends upon you and the choices you make for yourself." IP: Logged | |
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