posted October 29, 2011 01:50 PM            

I had to really be aware and piece things together around me growing up to realize the things I found intriguing/humrous/entertaining, were in actuality, offensive and socially inappropriate and/or unacceptable. I don't mean to be insensitive as well, but apparently I am. I quite often do not understand people's reactions to my ideas or what I say. They often act as if I have shot some figurative leader when all i was doing is bringing up hidden agendas and/or intellectual observations. But my question here is, do air signs especially people influenced heavily by air signs do they find inappropriate things funny and are insensitive? I understand their reaction from a mental point of view.. but I just cannot relate to them hurtful reactions emotionally. Its very impossible and i have tried this many times with no productive outcome. I have had a lot of people when debating "give up on me" because my ideals/ideas are fixed even though they 'offend' others, when I try to ask them to help me understand why it's offensive/subjective they eventually 'give up' on me because I just cannot understand their emotional reaction.

I dont mean to be insensitive. I was at the doctors office with my sister she is a Pisces, and the doctor placed both our folders on his desk. I started laughing softly, that quickly turned into a fit of laughter. She asked "What's funny?" I said, "I just think it's funny that your folder is massive in width compared to mine. Ha ha wow. My folder is tiny. Yours is pretty big. *lol*" I stopped laughing once i saw her face. She looked at me in this hurt way. with her jaw wide open. I asked her "What? Did I say something?" she said "You're a b****. That is so rude. Why would you laugh at that?" I said, "wait what? why are you upset.. I wasn't trying to be mean.. I just think its funny.." (my sister has a lot of health problems and she's been in and out quite a bit, i dont know why i found the chart thing funny.. it just was..) she ignored me that whole day and wouldn't talk to me. I really tried to understand what she was upset about, I wasn't trying to be rude :/

Stuff like this happens all the time, so I kind of grew up introverted because it seems that anything I said, even though I delivered it in a soft light and gentle way, it would offend others and I really don't like people being mad upset with me. But i grew out of that phase regardless.. people still dont like what I have to say/always think its rude or insensitive. Another scenario, I was watching Paranormal Activity, and a bunch of horror films with my boyfriend, (Sun/gemini, cancer moon/venus/mercury) and I started laughing whenever the serial killers would attack people, or when the victims were running helpless, he called me rude and insensitive and he even called me an '******* '.. I wasn't trying to be rude. I just thought it was funny. See this happens 90% of the time.

Im wondering if its an air sign thing.
Heres my chart

posted October 29, 2011 02:10 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by britterfly:
You have aqua ascendant, which is ruled by Uranus. I have Uranus conjunct my ascendant and I come across as very strange. I noticed that Aqua influenced people tend to be very crass and strait-forward, truth-speaking people, which can often be very hurtful. Uranus gives that offbeat vibe, which I am very familiar with. I come across as "weird" and am often accused of saying something inappropriate when I just consider my statements to be usually just truthful, so I sympathize. I can see why your sister would find your remark about her health folder to be insensitive; her health problems are likely a heavy cross she bears and source of much worry for her, so to have her thick health folder compared to your thin one and laughed at may have seemed that you were laughing at her poor health while gloating about your own. That was not what was going through your mind, but given her likely sensitivity on the issue, she must have taken it that way.

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posted October 29, 2011 02:13 PM            

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posted October 29, 2011 02:22 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ami Anne:
Oh My Goodness. I, always, laugh at the wrong time. I have a friend who does the same thing. If she and I are at a funeral or some place where you cannot laugh, I cannot even LOOK at her

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Oh god dont get me started. Funerals for me are hilarious. I don't know.. I always laugh at these things and events. The last funeral I went to, I had to leave the room when I seen someone crying but in a very exaggerated wailing kind of like manner. It was just amusing to me. Of course my mother wasn't okay with that. I wasn't trying to be rude, but I always find especially things like that, people crying especially funny. 2 years ago my sister had some mental breakdown and she was crying, and I laughed a little. Most of it comes from it being a defense mechanism, as I am very uncomfortable with people crying near or around me add to the fact that I don't cry.. at all.. and seeing that makes me VERY uncomfortable so in order to relieve it, I laugh or find the humor in it.

posted October 29, 2011 02:24 PM            

I'm an Aqua rising and Sag Sun. Truth and straight-forward-ness could have been my middle names. My sense of humor is "wicked" but most of the times my Pisces Node, my Nept MC, and my Taurus Moon manage to hold my tongue. I am too intuitive to not sense the other person's reactions and feelings before I even open my mouth. And if I offend, it's very easy for me to get in their shoes and understand why. But yeah it has happened that something I noticed and found hilarious left everyone unimpressed. I don't know many people with my sense of humor.

posted October 29, 2011 02:30 PM            

quote:

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I do care about her and her health even though this is something I have yet to disclose with her.

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posted October 29, 2011 02:39 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by anongrl10:
Do you understand why that joke would hurt her?
If so, please apologize.
Things like these stay between siblings forever and mark relationships.

I'm an Aqua rising and Sag Sun. Truth and straight-forward-ness could have been my middle names. My sense of humor is "wicked" but most of the times my Pisces Node, my Nept MC, and my Taurus Moon manage to hold my tongue. I am too intuitive to not sense the other person's reactions and feelings before I even open my mouth. And if I offend, it's very easy for me to get in their shoes and understand why. But yeah it has happened that something I noticed and found hilarious left everyone unimpressed. I don't know many people with my sense of humor.

If I were you, I would apologize to my sister. I know it was not your intention to hurt her but you were at the doc's office, she was anxious and concerned about her health and there is no way in that context she would ever "get" your joke about her health folder. Instead of laughing and then brush it off when it hurts others; just explain you didn't mean it that way and (sincerely) apologize. Then promise yourself to consider the context next time you blurt the next joke. All it takes is perspective.
You are smart enough for that.

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posted October 29, 2011 02:40 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by anongrl10:
Please, disclose it. Stop damaging a relationship with a loved one. Tell her you care. Tell her you did not mean to hurt her. Apologize. Once you get that message across, she might even laugh WITH you about those folders!

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posted October 29, 2011 02:55 PM            

[QUOTE ]Originally posted by lindisfarne:
I don't feel at all comfortable telling her I care about her. It makes me feel very vulnerable. I dont think I will verbally express it with her physically either. Maybe I will write her a letter. I do find that I often dont need to tell people how i feel about them. If i am with them thats more than enough proof that I like them. Right?[/QUOTE]

posted October 29, 2011 03:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
I don't feel at all comfortable telling her I care about her. It makes me feel very vulnerable. I dont think I will verbally express it with her physically either. Maybe I will write her a letter. I do find that I often dont need to tell people how i feel about them. If i am with them thats more than enough proof that I like them. Right?

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Actually what your describing is why Air signs and Fire signs get labeled as being insensitive and insincere. I know it's not something you do intentionally but it could be considerate to take into account other people's feelings when dealing with situations like the one with your sister. I am a Libra, and I always want people to be happy so I'll even sacrifice my own happiness for their well being. I'm too aware of the effect actions and words can have on people so even though I've got a twisted sense of humor and a dirty and morbid mind (Mercury in the 8th), I keep those thoughts to myself out of consideration for other people. Having a twisted sense of humor is fine but there's a time and place for expressing that. Be true to yourself but think about other people. You're not that different from your sister considering you have 2 personal planets in Pisces, meaning you can empathize.

posted October 29, 2011 03:16 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by NativelyJoan:
Actually what your describing is why Air signs and Fire signs get labeled as being insensitive and insincere. I know it's not something you do intentionally but it could be considerate to take into account other people's feelings when dealing with situations like the one with your sister. I am a Libra, and I always want people to be happy so I'll even sacrifice my own happiness for their well being. I'm too aware of the effect actions and words can have on people so even though I've got a twisted sense of humor and a dirty and morbid mind (Mercury in the 8th), I keep those thoughts to myself out of consideration for other people. Having a twisted sense of humor is fine but there's a time and place for expressing that. Be true to yourself but think about other people. You're not that different from your sister considering you have 2 personal planets in Pisces, meaning you can empathize.

But to answer your question, I'm a Libra with dominant Air in my chart and I've got a bitingly sarcastic sense of humor. My twisted thoughts come more from my Mercury in the 8th house and less from being an Air Sign.

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posted October 29, 2011 03:46 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
You think Air and Fire signs are insensitive?

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No, I don't. The scenario you described could be labeled as an example of why Air and Fire signs appear to be insensitive. It's a common generalization, I'm an Air sign and I'm not calling myself insensitive. But by laughing you failed to take into consideration how that reaction might make your sister feel.

posted October 29, 2011 03:49 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by lindisfarne:
I have been this way ever since I can remember. I don;t think I can "change" what entertains me, add the fact that I have a very dark and twisted sense of humor, very sarcastic and witty.

I had to really be aware and piece things together around me growing up to realize the things I found intriguing/humrous/entertaining, were in actuality, offensive and socially inappropriate and/or unacceptable. I don't mean to be insensitive as well, but apparently I am. I quite often do not understand people's reactions to my ideas or what I say. They often act as if I have shot some figurative leader when all i was doing is bringing up hidden agendas and/or intellectual observations. But my question here is, do air signs especially people influenced heavily by air signs do they find inappropriate things funny and are insensitive? I understand their reaction from a mental point of view.. but I just cannot relate to them hurtful reactions emotionally. Its very impossible and i have tried this many times with no productive outcome. I have had a lot of people when debating "give up on me" because my ideals/ideas are fixed even though they 'offend' others, when I try to ask them to help me understand why it's offensive/subjective they eventually 'give up' on me because I just cannot understand their emotional reaction.

I dont mean to be insensitive. I was at the doctors office with my sister she is a Pisces, and the doctor placed both our folders on his desk. I started laughing softly, that quickly turned into a fit of laughter. She asked "What's funny?" I said, "I just think it's funny that your folder is massive in width compared to mine. Ha ha wow. My folder is tiny. Yours is pretty big. *lol*" I stopped laughing once i saw her face. She looked at me in this hurt way. with her jaw wide open. I asked her "What? Did I say something?" she said "You're a b****. That is so rude. Why would you laugh at that?" I said, "wait what? why are you upset.. I wasn't trying to be mean.. I just think its funny.." (my sister has a lot of health problems and she's been in and out quite a bit, i dont know why i found the chart thing funny.. it just was..) she ignored me that whole day and wouldn't talk to me. I really tried to understand what she was upset about, I wasn't trying to be rude :/

Stuff like this happens all the time, so I kind of grew up introverted because it seems that anything I said, even though I delivered it in a soft light and gentle way, it would offend others and I really don't like people being mad upset with me. But i grew out of that phase regardless.. people still dont like what I have to say/always think its rude or insensitive. Another scenario, I was watching Paranormal Activity, and a bunch of horror films with my boyfriend, (Sun/gemini, cancer moon/venus/mercury) and I started laughing whenever the serial killers would attack people, or when the victims were running helpless, he called me rude and insensitive and he even called me an '******* '.. I wasn't trying to be rude. I just thought it was funny. See this happens 90% of the time.

Im wondering if its an air sign thing.
Heres my chart

ASC - aqua
sun - aqua house 12
moon - pisces house 1
mercury - aqua house 1
Venus - pisces house 1
jupiter - libra house 8
saturn - aqua house 1
mars - cancer house 6
pluto - scorpio house 9
chiron - leo house 7
ceres - pisces house 1
lilth - pisces house 1
fortune - aquarius house 1
node - sagittarius house 11
mc sagittarius
Uranus and Neptune in cap house 12
pallas - aquarius house 1

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I am thinking it is that you have so much stuff in the fist house and maybe this makes you impulsive so you end up laughing before your mind gets the chance to put yourself in the other person's shoes. I think this is why even though you have a lot of Pisces in you, you are not very sensitive, the dominance of first house placements.

I ALSO THINK YOU FIND THINGS FUNNY THAT ARE INAPPROPRIATE BC YOU DONT WANT TO DEAL WITH IT IN AN EMOTIONAL LEVEL. IT SOUNDS LIKE A DEFENSE MECHANISM AS WELL.

posted October 29, 2011 04:07 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by amelia28:

I am thinking it is that you have so much stuff in the fist house and maybe this makes you impulsive so you end up laughing before your mind gets the chance to put yourself in the other person's shoes. I think this is why even though you have a lot of Pisces in you, you are not very sensitive, the dominance of first house placements.

I ALSO THINK YOU FIND THINGS FUNNY THAT ARE INAPPROPRIATE BC YOU DONT WANT TO DEAL WITH IT IN AN EMOTIONAL LEVEL. IT SOUNDS LIKE A DEFENSE MECHANISM AS WELL.

I am thinking as you grow older this tendency will become more balanced.

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posted October 29, 2011 04:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by britterfly:
You have aqua ascendant, which is ruled by Uranus. I have Uranus conjunct my ascendant and I come across as very strange. I noticed that Aqua influenced people tend to be very crass and strait-forward, truth-speaking people, which can often be very hurtful. Uranus gives that offbeat vibe, which I am very familiar with. I come across as "weird" and am often accused of saying something inappropriate when I just consider my statements to be usually just truthful, so I sympathize. I can see why your sister would find your remark about her health folder to be insensitive; her health problems are likely a heavy cross she bears and source of much worry for her, so to have her thick health folder compared to your thin one and laughed at may have seemed that you were laughing at her poor health while gloating about your own. That was not what was going through your mind, but given her likely sensitivity on the issue, she must have taken it that way.

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Honestly I have an Aqua ascendant and Uranus on an angle, and I can't relate to the OP at all. My sense of humor is controversial in the sense that I like what's considered 'blue' comedy, swear words, bathroom humor, dirty humor, shocking humor, that type of thing - and yes, I am a 'weird' person, but it's not that I find inappropriate things humorous and I can actually see why the OP's sister was so upset.

posted October 29, 2011 05:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by BelligerentPygmy:
Honestly I have an Aqua ascendant and Uranus on an angle, and I can't relate to the OP at all. My sense of humor is controversial in the sense that I like what's considered 'blue' comedy, swear words, bathroom humor, dirty humor, shocking humor, that type of thing - and yes, I am a 'weird' person, but it's not that I find inappropriate things humorous and I can actually see why the OP's sister was so upset.

This reminds me of the time I was in a chatroom recently and myself and another member were discussing cancer of all things, and while I was in the middle of talking to her about my granddad's death from lung cancer...a third member on webcam started laughing.

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posted October 29, 2011 06:14 PM            

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posted October 30, 2011 04:37 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Delilah:
Kind of both. Jupiter is about happiness, good fortune, and laughter. The word jovial comes from Jupiter: "of or pertaining to the god Jove, or Jupiter." The aspects to this planet and its placement shape our sense of humor. Jupiter in the 1st house can mean that a person often laughs before the joke is over, can laugh at themselves, or laughs quite a lot. In the 8th, it's almost like a rebellion against the norm. No matter how bad life or a situation is, not much can stop the "church giggles" if something ridiculous happens. Like I said, I'm just skimming the surface with this.

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posted October 30, 2011 01:34 PM            

quote:

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No, communication is paramount.
Esp. when there are misunderstandings.
Writing her a letter would have the same effect as talking to her, so if it makes you feel less vulnerable please go for it.
Remember, you're not the only one who feels vulnerable, she feels vulnerable (and probably humiliated) too!

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quote:

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I am thinking it is that you have so much stuff in the fist house and maybe this makes you impulsive so you end up laughing before your mind gets the chance to put yourself in the other person's shoes. I think this is why even though you have a lot of Pisces in you, you are not very sensitive, the dominance of first house placements.

I ALSO THINK YOU FIND THINGS FUNNY THAT ARE INAPPROPRIATE BC YOU DONT WANT TO DEAL WITH IT IN AN EMOTIONAL LEVEL. IT SOUNDS LIKE A DEFENSE MECHANISM AS WELL.

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I agree with what these people said.

I can actually relate to you Lindisfarne, because, especially when I was younger, I used to laugh very inappropriately. Now, the thing about me is that I have LOTS of earth and fire, and very little air. However, I do have three planets in the first house, and my Moon in Aries, so I think that contributed. I also have a strong Uranus.

As for you, I think that it's a combination of being surrounded by water sign influenced people (they've taught me A LOT), being a fixed sign, having several planets in the first, 8th house Jupiter, AND being heavily air influenced. It's kind of like an 'all of the above' type of scenario.

Laughter can definitely be a defense mechanism that distances you from having to FEEL and deal with strong emotions. I know that I often don't even realize when I'm doing it on a conscious level. I just start laughing in a bad situation (I laugh when I feel like things just can't get any worse). This might come across as rude and insensitive, when in reality, it is a way to cope with strong emotions.

Also, I read somewhere that, from a biological/psychological level, the reason that we laugh is because we see/hear something that could potentially be fatal/harmful to us but then the 'danger is avoided' and this is why laughter occurs (they always used to say in my theatre class that the only difference between a tragedy and a comedy is that, in a comedy, the danger is avoided). Perhaps on a biological/unconscious level, your laughter at your sister's situation is because you see the inequality of harmfulness in the situation (you avoided it, and she doesn't- due to poor health) AND ALSO you have strong emotions about your sister's health.

I really don't know how it is for you, but for me, I've had to learn over the years to consider the impact of my words and actions on others. Can laughter be misconstrued into insensitivity? Absolutely. For this reason, communication IS very important to express to others that you aren't actively trying to HURT them.

Water signs are truly the best teachers in this. I've learned how to gauge the insensitivity level based on their reactions and that's when I take a step back and try to figure out how to balance my words/actions.