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Author Topic:   Venus square Mars-Natal Chart
VenusDiSirius
Knowflake

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posted January 04, 2012 08:58 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have this aspect,and I am interested to find out how it's playing out in your experiences.
I remember when starting to learn astrology,I came on some very dark interpretations.
Even today,when I discuss this,it seems to me that not much understanding is gained,even those with considerable astroknowledge end up dismissing the aspect as very unfavourable and growth lacking,to put it mildly.
One of the recent examples I saw is where one,really good astrologer,upon seeing Venus sq Mars in a man's chart (famous director) very blatantly said that this man CAN NOT love or respect women,and he is probably abusing his wife.

So,I am asking,what's gloomy and what's good about this aspect???

Thanks,Knowflakes

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mintgirl123
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posted January 04, 2012 09:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mintgirl123     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
They just feel really ill at ease with love and expressing it. Cos you know their assertive side clashes with their loving side. It's usually this back and forth energy, and they're not very stable.

I wouldn't want to be with a guy that has this aspect. Would prefer venus conjunct mars.

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 09:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I don't!
The most vital part of this square is,for me,that I can't love with passion and vice versa.

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Mermaid
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posted January 04, 2012 09:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mermaid     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
They can love and hate with the same intensity.I have this aspect in natal,though its 4 dgs wide.I think it would affect both genders in the same way as Venus(males) is squaring Mars (for females)and it would obstruct the easy flow of energy between both when compared to trine or sextile.

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 09:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Mermaid:
They can love and hate with the same intensity.I have this aspect in natal,though its 4 dgs wide.I think it would affect both genders in the same way as Venus(males) is squaring Mars (for females)and it would obstruct the easy flow of energy between both when compared to trine or sextile.

So,it is the interwinding roads of love and hate that makes is so negative?

4 degree is good,inner planets,square genrated loads of energy,even wider orb would work.

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 09:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
dp

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Lonake
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posted January 04, 2012 10:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
VenusDS ~ I hear Venus sq Mars is apt for bad timing issues, you know, just like it plays out in the synastry, one is full on and the other is 'meh, I'm interested HECK YEA but you need to tone it down a bit.'
It also adds sex appeal. So let's not complain here
You may come on too strong to some, even tho they may be interested, and to others it's not enough and you end up blowing the whole deal cos you could've stepped it up a bit.
Yours is in Cancer to Aries, so when over playing the Cancer you may seem too maternal, just interested in sweet feelings, other people offer you care/concern and deep down they want something MORE but your reaction maybe is just a familial sort of response, platonic, and when over playing Aries, well, you might make up for any Cancer tendencies? Do you speak a bit out of line when inflamed, very blunt? I noticed that w.Aries Mars men at least.

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 10:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Bad timing,yes that happened...once or twice
I can be blunt.(I also have H3 Uranus)

Why would conflicting desires and need for affection/love result in aspect widely regarded as marker for bad/unhealthy sexual identity?

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Lonake
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posted January 04, 2012 10:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^ I think it's a valid factor for abuse, but it is just one factor. It can lend to frustrated desires, not getting what you want so in some they feel that they can TAKE IT when they want, regardless of who says what. And in so taking, they may TAKE OUT their frustrations on that person too. So it sounds like one likely factor for rape/violence in relationships.
So I think you can imagine how in some natals it could take a nasty turn.
It's just one possible manifestation.
It does tend to heighten the sexual drive. Sexual needs gone unmet in some can turn dangerous.
This would also be as a result of their bad timing, they come on too strong and the other is not keen on their approach, but the Venus/Mars person in this case would be a bit demented, taking it too far.
Or they could attract people who push their desires on them. People who won't go away when the answer is obv "no." Another possibility. If there's enough of that, then a hostile tone could be taken w.the opposite sex, cos they've generally been annoying lil p!ss ants.

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 10:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You have a strong point there.I have seen it,unfortunately,in few cases,nothing heinous,but native (usually girl) carries very specific provocative energy,similar to Venus/Pluto square.

But,I still find it is alarming how many negative traits are out there,this and the fact that men seem to handle it better.

quote:
People who won't go away when the answer is obv
"no." Another possibility. If there's enough of that, then a
hostile tone could be taken w.the opposite sex, cos they've
generally been annoying lil p!ss ants.

This happened to me many times,very pushy approach,usually in public places (Dcs Mars)

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Lonake
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posted January 04, 2012 10:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^ How do you see the men handling this sq?

So do you see yourself as quite provocative? The Mars is in Aries H7, sq Venus, I would think so?

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 11:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Since they are men,they can come across strongly without being refused/judged,because it is becoming for men to be the chaser/conqueror. They are often very romantic and love women.
But the woman of this man is very sexual,and some sort of passive main force. And she is lover,foremost.
Interestingly,I have many examples where men are infatuated with one woman for a life time (usually wife),she is their muse,but officially it never passes into strictly love/respect department,as it happens over time. They are always object of desire. (Moon sometimes makes the difference,in making man more tame)
And as such,very attractive and successful.

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Lonake
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posted January 04, 2012 11:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^ O. I forgot.
The old double standard.

Do you think Venus/Mars sq for some women could be termed 'the hot b!tch'?
Sexual allure but w.feistiness added, and the token dismissive quality re:men?
The men want to be with her, but they know she bites and scratches.
That's how you make me think of this one now.
I'll have to think of it for a bit.
I may be confusing it w.Pluto.

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 11:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Lonake:
^ How do you see the men handling this sq?

So do you see yourself as quite provocative? The Mars is in Aries H7, sq Venus, I would think so?


And Venus is also angular,on Mc. (ruler of H1 and H8,most aspecting planet)
Especially when growing up,many,many undesired,overtly sexual attention(in my young mind) although I sexually matured early,I never liked it.

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Lonake
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posted January 04, 2012 11:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^ Seemed crass & offensive, too much testosterone?
I've so been there, but with your Venus H10 you must have felt v.v.exposed it seems.
Hard to hide it, for sure.

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 04, 2012 11:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Do you think Venus/Mars sq for some women could be
termed 'the hot b!tch'?
Sexual allure but w.feistiness added, and the token
dismissive quality re:men?
The men want to be with her, but they know she bites and
scratches.
That's how you make me think of this one now.
I'll have to think of it for a bit.
I may be confusing it w.Pluto.

I feel that any constantly confident woman today can be labelled as b!tch. Maybe because Mars is involved,men along with wanting to be with her,are also very offended,ego bruised,because of her,wearing the alpha code so unabashedly. Pluto is more personal.

quote:
Seemed crass & offensive, too much testosterone?
I've so been there, but with your Venus H10 you must have
felt v.v.exposed it seems.
Hard to hide it, for sure

VERY. It felt disguisting,at times,but no matter how it was unpleasant,I never thought something is wrong with me,so it did have some healthy aspects.
Interestingly,my brothers and I,we all have Venus/Mars sq.

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Betty Boop
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posted January 05, 2012 02:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Betty Boop     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
:edit:

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 05, 2012 03:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I don't project negative experiences onto next ones,I rarely have any emotional baggage,when things are done,they are done,also don't like being slave to a notion or obsession,and this is very fundamental part of my personality,that is impossible for me to dwell on anything bad in the first place; not just that,but good experiences I had are intact even if we end badly.The things that are good about certain person are autonomic,I will remember them only by good things.Having said this,there are some limits I can not cross,and this rigidity may seem as holding onto past/bad,but it never is ! When I notice bag things people mostly experience,it has almost philosophical background to it- I observe something that's happening,but I do not empathize. I don't think 'hey if I act like them same thing will happen to me'. I don't believe I can learn from other people experiences or mistakes.

I attract attention,and many times it has been unpleasant. I am not attracted to bad boys or jerks. In my book,in love there must be respect. You can not love if you don't respect. Futhermore,I also don't think that love has to hurt in order to be love. I never thought after some ridiculous situation caused by a rude man 'Omg will I ever find love/some one decent?' I know I will,I am open to love,adventures= this is significant part of my definition of love,love is exciting!

I have good relations to both men and women. I often gain respect from men quite easily (I have Sun trining Saturn and Uranus). Also Asc ruler on MC that can stand for natural authority,that exudes respect in relation.


I am not a marriage person,I don't like the idea of being held down. I come from very traditionalistic society,where being married is a status symbol. As if woman has no value if single. But,down the road,if I find the one and only,I could easily make that step. Also,having a Cancer Venus,boys somehow always want to marry me


As I said,I hail from traditionalistic society,and I have been attacked,as a female. I am not flawed if I am woman. I fiercely stand up for everything that need to be acknowledged. Many a time,this 'incidenta' are offensive to my intelligence. But I won't address anything to one man what I have heard from another. I find these situations very awarding,the moment when all truth is shown or when masks fall is catharsic to me. I don't care how hard something can hit me if it can open my eyes,when deceived for example. (funnily,I have been deceived twice -See how Cappy Moon counts - but both time it was a friendship,not love relationship.)

I have met some really whorish women. But,as general personality,not sexually whorish. I often feel that my propensity to meet lower types rather than higher (everyday life) is Mars Dsc. Challenging karma. This is very lesson-like,I am not involved with these people but I observe them intensely. When I make some general conclusion,it is never because of the gender.


I love boys


^every new paragraph is for one of the quotes.

Lonake,BB,thanks

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Neptune'sDaughter
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posted January 05, 2012 06:21 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Neptune'sDaughter     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have Venus in Aqua Square Mars in Taurus.

"You may come on too strong to some, even tho they may be interested, and to others it's not enough and you end up blowing the whole deal cos you could've stepped it up a bit."

YES YES and YES!!!


"Attracting jerks... Dating jerks... Being a jerk to the jerks that you are dating (hence, perpetuating the jerky-ness)... Focusing on jerks.. and spending time and energy thinking about jerks - thereby helping you attract *even more* jerks"

OY! (reluctantly) Yes..

"Many people in this world can be friends with individuals of both sexes..... If X is not one of them.. This isn't because they are all bit*chy... It's because - X has issues."

Yes..and no. I have venus aqua in the 11th house and a 7th house moon. I am truly prone to have all women friends and love them very deeply -but also prone to attracting that female jealousy. (venus square mars = sex appeal, esp, since venus in aqua = glamour when with a pisces sun and mars in taurus = sensuality; moon in 7th = sex appeal -it's the 'Marilyn Monroe' placement) So it IS possible to really NOT have the problem yourself but for who you are (or what you look like) to trigger others' insecurities!!

I've even gone so far as to gain alot of weight, dress schluppy and down-play myself to avoid 'triggering' 'b!tchiness'from females because female friendship means so much to me! -but I usually end up getting confessions from even my closest friends that they are jealous of me and envy me :-( -even after all that!

On another note I will ALWAYS choose a good female friend over a dude ANYDAY!! HOWEVER... if a female friend screws me over over a guy.... OH.IT'S.OVER!! OOOO-VEER!! I don't play that ****!

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"You may say that I'm a dreamer but I'm not the only one..."

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Neptune'sDaughter
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posted January 05, 2012 06:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Neptune'sDaughter     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
"I attract attention,and many times it has been unpleasant. I am not attracted to bad boys or jerks. In my book,in love there must be respect. You can not love if you don't respect. Futhermore,I also don't think that love has to hurt in order to be love. I never thought after some ridiculous situation caused by a rude man 'Omg will I ever find love/some one decent?' I know I will,I am open to love,adventures= this is significant part of my definition of love,love is exciting! "

Although I have had my problem attracting jerks (which can be from other aspects) I DO agree with what you've said. I can't believe the prejudice and misinterpretation of this aspect! Aspects are ENERGIES not concrete viewpoints!If channeled properly they can be worked out and use in phenomenal ways.

I read that this aspect means the person probably means a person hates small animals -NOT TRUE!!!!! Actually, when I feel down I want to HELP others and I VOLUNTEER AT THE ANIMAL SHELTER! I've adopted two bunnies and I've even CPR'd my Goldfish! lol So, yes this shows an intense conflict between certain types of energies but NOT a set viewpoint or lifestyle!

A funny note: the bunnies I adopted? She's Taurus and he's Aquarius -just like my Venus in Aqua Square Mars in Taurus! At first they had friction because he ignored her lol. But now they are PERFECT for each other. Whenever I feel conflicted (esp. over how I have trouble expressing attraction to the guy I'm attracted to, like lately) I just watch them together and see the outer representation of what is healing in me internally with this aspect ^.^

Oh another interesting (to me) note: My venus and mars are both in the 17th degree which equals KARMIC POSITION.

------------------
"You may say that I'm a dreamer but I'm not the only one..."

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Lonake
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posted January 05, 2012 06:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
(Venus sq Mars here)
I am sooo not attracted to jerks.
I like the nice respectful boys. Sweet + super masculine.
That's it (!)

BTW BB, VDS has Venus at MC,
which strengthens the planet.
Teasel and I have Venus conj a luminary, does the same thing.
So I guess now I'm wondering if the people you quoted have Venus strengthened in their charts?
And if maybe Venus in Taurus/Libra/Pisces might also be exceptions, cos it would be strengthened in those signs?

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VenusDiSirius
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posted January 07, 2012 03:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for VenusDiSirius     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
bumping

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Betty Boop
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posted January 07, 2012 07:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Betty Boop     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Venus! Thank you so much for explaining this in detail! I can relate a lot to what you have posted - even though I have the trine. I'm glad that you don't project one person's mistakes onto their entire gender. Anyway - I'm sure this attitude is not confined to Venus sq. Mars. It's just that the people I know with the aspect - are always pretty negative about male/female relationships.
Sorry about the late reply but I've been working on something literally from 9 am to 10 pm. I'm finally taking a break on Sunday!!

Neptune's Daughter - I think sometimes it's not a conscious choice at all - but rather what you end up attracting. Maybe this aspect has a very -strong sexual- vibe - a vibe that seems unsettling or threatening to men.. so the only ones who are not afraid to approach you, might also be more 'aggressive' or jerky.
I'm glad you do have female friends and I do partially agree to what you're saying (that some girls are just insecure and nasty).
But imo it always takes two to tango. Even if a girl was very attractive and others who have low self-esteem would react by feeling threatened... or by being bit*chy towards her... there is always a choice as to how the girl *deals* with this.
My reaction to a situation like this is to try to calm/relax the insecure person - and make that person understand that I'm human and have just as many flaws and problems as everyone else. I would try to inconspicuously boost their self esteem.. if this was a person I had to interact with. And this works for me. No one manages to stay bit*chy towards me for longer than a week.

But Venus sq Mars women sometimes have the reaction that if another woman is bit*chy... they kind instantly hate her and they perpetuate a war-like situation, instead of neutralizing it.

Lonake -

quote:
BTW BB, VDS has Venus at MC,
which strengthens the planet.
Teasel and I have Venus conj a luminary, does the same thing.
So I guess now I'm wondering if the people you quoted have Venus strengthened in their charts?

This is a really good point Lonake! Maybe it's the people who have Mars stronger in their chart - who are more aggressive.
So if Venus is strengthened, these people would be stronger in Venusian attributes - like being able to compromise and seeing things for the others perspective - and having a better view of relationships in general.
I'll check the charts of the ones I quoted, but I didn't think they had anything conjunct Venus.

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Betty Boop
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posted January 07, 2012 07:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Betty Boop     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
the bunnies I adopted? She's Taurus and he's Aquarius -just like my Venus in Aqua Square Mars in Taurus! At first they had friction because he ignored her lol. But now they are PERFECT for each other. Whenever I feel conflicted (esp. over how I have trouble expressing attraction to the guy I'm attracted to, like lately) I just watch them together and see the outer representation of what is healing in me internally with this aspect ^.^

That's very cute! I love bunnies.. Actually when I was at the dog park about a week ago, there was a girl with a little bunny and she wanted her bunny to meet my dog.. I was wary just in case.. he jumps or anything - BUT actually they really liked each other and the bunny didn't even get scared. My dog was just besides himself - wagging away in sheer happiness. He didn't attack at all.
I should've asked her when her bunny was born. My dog is an Aquarius lol - so I guess he is naturally the 'humanitarian' version of a dog. I doubt he'd kill anything even if he was starving.

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Neptune'sDaughter
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posted January 07, 2012 08:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Neptune'sDaughter     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Betty boop

If any woman can be humble, understanding, supportive, and backseat taking/non competitive to her female friends then a pisces with a 12h sun and a 11th venus in aqua. When my friends tell me they're jealous, etc. it is not a knock down drag out fight. It's usually an embarressed mention or an exasperated egging on for me to take for myself something in my life (guy, job, etc) because they're already envious about how that sphere of my life Is good in their eyes.

I handle b*tches in 3 ways:
1., ignore them if they're irrelevant to my life.
2. Be my natural caring/empathetic self until they have to accept it -usually because everyone around thinks well of me and knows my character (as you mentioned you also do)
3. Address it in a firm no-nonsense and detached way

------------------
"You may say that I'm a dreamer but I'm not the only one..."

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