posted May 02, 2012 03:30 PM            

You'd think I was living in the slums, but this is one bad apple in this great neighborhood.

It's been going on for a few years, and although it's clear she's not right in her head (she even looks like a nutcase), it still feels like a knife in my heart.

I've been nothing but kind to her although from the beginning I could see she was going to try to control me, perhaps on behalf of her husband who has her groveling for Scooby Snax. He has free lawn care, free maid service, free cook, and free you-know-what, and that sincerely seems like why he fished thru single's ads to find someone desperate with no self-esteem.

So I truly feel bad for her, but she's a complete bully.

It's as if I'm being punished for not being her friend. Really crazy.

It's not easy for me to ask for help, but i'm posting this to get some feedback. Maybe it's a planetary phase, and usually after a few days, things like this wash over. But when it seems to clog up my Mercury & Mars in Scorpio for too long, it's like a poison in my veins and I'm actually getting physically sick, perhaps due to my diplomatic Libra Sun, and very sensitive Cancer Moon still seeking balance & harmony.

I keep telling myself that people with such hatred as part of their make-up eventually do themselves in, and frankly, it's a huge mystery to me since I would never be capable of doing a tiny percent of what they do and still have a pulse.

posted May 02, 2012 06:30 PM            

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Passion, Lust, Desire. Check out my journal

posted May 02, 2012 06:42 PM            

You described it your self, she thrives on suffering and part of loving her is accepting that she may actually WANT to be miserable. If you want to help her, be an example to her. Be kind to her when you can. When it is time to take care of your self, politely excuse your self. This person's energy is effecting you, because you are being receptive to it. You have no control over her actions, but you do have control over where you are and who you open your self to.

posted May 02, 2012 08:04 PM            

She can say what ever, but you know who you are,and thats what matters.

posted May 02, 2012 08:41 PM            

There's two things that make this especially risky, one that she's a neighbor, and two, that she has mental/emotional problems out of the gate.

I've had an eye on our current planetary Transits. Of course the month of April is the most difficult one for Libra's, since the Transiting Sun is in the Opposite Sign.

That has only passed very recently, and we're still left with the Transiting Mercury in Aries. There's also the Transiting Moon & Mars in picky/dissecting Virgo!

So there's an awful lot of undisciplined shoot-from-the-hip opinions and actions right now. A lot of people on live TV who are normally perfect speakers have been tripping over their words & releasing Freudian Slips galore.

Please keep the feedback coming!

posted May 03, 2012 10:22 AM            

Actually, to be exact, my neighbors 2 houses down from my right are awesome, same as the 3 houses to my left (and a good friend who lives down the street). But most of the rest are nightmares. AND they have sent their kids to do their bidding in the past.

I'd go with Xiiro's advice. Ignore seems to be the best option for your situation. Indifference can drive a bully mad.

Hope the tension eases.

posted May 03, 2012 11:14 AM            

Can you see any one thing leading up to this?

posted May 03, 2012 04:27 PM            

I think the quick answer would be, as others have posted, to just ignore her. But that's easier said then done. You might not be able to ignore. She might use your distance or lack of attention towards her as an excuse to instigate something else. It's a pretty tough situation. People who have issues with other people don't especially like to be ignored. Their like screaming children. Can you imagine how difficult it is to ignore a child that's screaming? You just can't sometimes. Somehow you have to manage the situation so you don't get sucked into this women's misery yet handling the situation so you can be of service to yourself.

I swear Libra's are being tested with these Aries Transits. I've been facing a lot of situations similar to this BackToEarth. One of my coworkers actually reminds me of this woman you've described. I can't ignore her because we handle projects together. And if I get on her bad side she'll proceed to make my life a nightmare. It's a tough call. I'm being as diplomatic as possible and delicate when handling her. I'm aware of her intentions and I've decided to let it go. I won't even try to understand her insanity, I've just let it go and I'm spreading peace in the work environment to alleviate the tension. I'm also being an extra careful peacemaker by not allowing her to control me through her insensitivity and allowing myself to be true to myself by not getting pulled into a pool of hate. I get physically sick as well in disharmonious situations and I have a very delicate nervous system. All that negativity and discord just become too much for me.

Keeping focusing on you BTE. This women might learn a thing or two from your composure if you handle her in a peaceful manner. Maybe she'll even open up to you. I think you're being tested on a cosmic level. A very difficult situation to be in indeed. My advice is, don't go out of your way to ignore her cause that can be incredible exhausting and quite an effort. Just keep your distance and let things unfold as they should. If you have to deal with her, be diplomatic. Use those Venusian traits to show her what it means to be a decent human being. Meditate, find objectivity, and continue being you.

posted May 03, 2012 07:10 PM            

Emotional detachment is best way to go treat her like anyone else you know informally.

posted May 03, 2012 07:27 PM            

Looking at Transits, Mars in Virgo only at 5.53 Degrees? Only "new" thing I see besides the Moon in my Sign at the half-way point (perhaps apropo since Libra is about meeting half-way). But still questioning because it's not at all unusual for me to actually feel these subliminal shifts.

Going back to reading all your amazing thoughts... each is so meaningful to me, be back in a sec. Thank you!

posted May 03, 2012 07:35 PM            

For example:

Them: "how are you?"

You: "ok."

Them: "I saw a nigga down the street today and i think our neighbourhood is under attack."

You: "hmm" - no eye contact.

Them: "so what do you think of niggers"..

You: "hmmm..."

Them: You're very quiet today. What is up with you? Why aren't you talking to me? etc etc..

You: "Just tired.. *yawn*" - and walk away.

posted May 03, 2012 07:39 PM            

quote:

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I've been nothing but kind to her

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posted May 04, 2012 01:40 AM            

You wrote:

quote:

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I would approach her next time and ask her what she hates so much... Up to you and good luck... I ignore my neighbour's but sometimes they'll say hello and I'll say it back

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She's quite a stalker, so I'll never approach her. Stalker! I'm a great sport & a great forgiver, giving people like this all the benefit of the doubt. She's bottled up in her house 24/7 just festering. I'm not easily coaxed into denial & I don't play around. Or, as Zak Bagans would say, "You've never come across guys like us before."

Ami Anne -

You wrote:

quote:

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IF you can do it( and it is very, very hard) show her love. Sometimes I can do this. Sometimes, I can't but it is very powerful and that would be the only way to come to a resolution, I think.

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Have you ever stopped going thru the motions because you realize the overall dynamics of your make-up can't follow through? It's like that. It's not something I have complete control over, but sort of God's will coming thru me, providing a mirror to the other person, which they either appreciate or their mirror shatters. It's something I've always struggled with, until I read it in my Chart, and I was like OH! It's not a bad thing!

Xiiro -

You wrote:

quote:

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I would leave her alone and phase her out as much as possible... she may actually WANT to be miserable

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I've been in longterm relationships with people who aren't happy unless they're not happy. I'd leave it to her husband, but he strikes me as someone who doesn't appreciate her at all & is using her. Her being phased out seems to be all she knows, so yeah.

Desiring Shadows -

You wrote:

quote:

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If shes bad energy, maybe stay away, because shes obviously bringing you down... I agree with what Xiiro said!

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Bad energy, and it's permanently next door. I've been brought up to keep a respectable distance from neighbors, it's a golden rule. Some are oblivious to common sense.

Lioness -

You wrote:

quote:

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try to not let this person phase you, or have this power of anger over you

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You said it. But it doesn't hit me like "anger", it really is more like hurting my heart. I'd rather feel intense hurt than contemplate serious revenge for even a second. Yes, I take action when I know she hopes to specifically cause hurt, but it's never giving in to anger. "Luke, give in to your anger". When someone commits an insincere act towards me, I offer them a "dummy" version of my heart to see what they do. She crushed it & BarBQ'd it. Is it any wonder she's still obsessed?

Alma Sun -

You wrote:

quote:

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Indifference can drive a bully mad

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You got it! She's itching for some kind of fight. Get a rise out of me. She's always been very intrusive, and ultimately, hostile. Within the first 2 min's of meeting her, I wanted to walk away. Indifference is worse than hate, and they hate that.

juniperb -

Ah! You quoted our very own Dee. The part about:

"Moon in Libra is going to join Saturn as her last aspect suggesting a finality, ending and a new beginning on Friday afternoon."

That's exactly what it feels like, but there's this exhaustion left behind!

Also, the part, "Make them fire you. which is based on Dee's analysis of current Transits is spot on. It's like, you want some of this? Come & get it. Bring yo big bad self. And it's common knowledge that bullies are tremendous cowards.

You mentioned where my Mars & my Virgo Cusp is. I had such a strong feeling my Mars was involved because it required mountains of INaction. My Mars is in the 6th (which Rules Virgo), and my Virgo Planets are in my 4th House, which Rules Home.

Nothing is Transiting my 3rd House of Neighbors & Siblings. But Transiting Mars is right smack on top of my Pluto in Virgo in the 4th. Wonder if this made a super intense test.

NativelyJoan -

You wrote:

quote:

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I swear Libra's are being tested with these Aries Transits... One of my coworkers actually reminds me of this woman you've described... don't go out of your way to ignore her cause that can be incredible exhausting... let things unfold as they should...

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Yes, the Aries Transits have been super harsh on Libra's this go-round. Struggling with that Empty Aries Space in my T-Square in the 12th House, which when the Apex Mars in Scorpio breaks down, it's been a Wild Card type situation in the past.

You having a similar person at work, that's one of the reason's I don't do too well in typical work environments. Seeing the same negative people and having to put on that "work" face in closed quarters. No can do. I don't even know where to start, to help you with that. You seem to be helping me more! Ha Ha.

I know what you mean by not exerting too much energy to ignore her, it's like the laws of attraction. The more you try to repel, the more you attract, etc. So yeah, I'm there. In fact, I think she feels even more disarmed and confused when it seems as if I'm not avoiding her at all...

Letting things unfold as they should is the only reason we're here on Earth, and where she fails miserably. The kind of person who thinks, "she's only doing that to make me (blank blank)", or "to make me feel (blank blank)". Nooooo... that's YOUR modus operandi. I'm just being me.

Thefish -

You wrote:

quote:

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rule of thumb is don't invite trouble to your doorstep... getting involved merely creates unnecessary drama for you...

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I'm such a huge "no more drama" person. Aren't those always the moments we look back on with huge regret and embarrassment? But people who are controlling bring it onto themselves over & over, like they never learn at all!

Betty Boop -

You had me balling out laughing at your pretend script, not funny because it's funny, but because it's actually extremely close to how her end of the conversation went and you matched the absurdity. In fact, that was the very last time I allowed her to say a word to me. I literally wanted to throw up.

She used the "spic" word too, and I wonder if her daddy/husband talks this way too, because there's all kinds of races proudly serving the US Military, and I wonder how they can justify putting out their American flag on Veteran's Day.

Thank you so much everyone. I'm just left with exhaustion, and wouldn't be surprised if she privately failed this Cosmic test.

I was thinking of Junior Seau, the football player who recently died, supposedly due to a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the chest. Wondering if this last test got to him. So it's not something we should take lightly.

We're so lucky to have each other here at Lindaland, and so fortunate to be on this path of self-understanding through the beautiful artform of astrology.

Any feedback is still greatly appreciated.