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Author
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Topic: Holding your Pluto back
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T
Knowflake Posts: 7009
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 08, 2012 02:17 AM
  
....does this mean anything to other Plutonians, Scorpios, or heavy 8th housers?Do you find yourself having to do this in order not to hurt people...? - restrain yourself because you know it would kill them (emotionally, I mean)? Even when they are being malicious and hurtful towards you? Are you able to hold yourself back? Do you rise above and not sink to their level? Do you find it easy to do, ever have a problem with it, something you grew into, or were born doing naturally? Do you find you take more care with others feelings than your own? All kinds of answers welcome. IP: Logged |
sand
Knowflake Posts: 5205
From: 14.5530° N, 121.0199° E
Registered: May 2011
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posted August 08, 2012 02:38 AM
As much as i want to i honestly cant control it yet. My pluto and asc are both on 0 scorpio.. Sometimes i just feel i have to say and do what i mean because it is my truth. no malice or stooping down though in my case or at least it never enters my mind they could be as such. Really it is more my will against theirs. IP: Logged |
aquaguy91
Moderator Posts: 3889
From: tennessee
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted August 08, 2012 03:13 AM
yes! its hard, i manage to do it though, but i have evil evil thoughts.  IP: Logged |
T
Knowflake Posts: 7009
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 08, 2012 03:54 AM
guys,  IP: Logged |
Belage
Knowflake Posts: 864
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 08, 2012 04:02 AM
Interesting thread. I am curious as well. More answers would be appreciated. IP: Logged |
peachbeigeblue
Knowflake Posts: 1691
From:
Registered: Apr 2012
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posted August 08, 2012 04:15 AM
Yes yes yes yes yes to all of the above.
Sometimes it's easier than others. But in heated arguments, I always have to consciously hold my tongue. I never go "low blows" except once in a great while and I always regret it. My words can be cutting even when I do restrain myself. I don't want to hurt people I care about, but when they hurt me badly - its how I feel like I need to get out sometimes and then all is well. My best friend has a lot of patience. I have been worse than Id like to admit with it with her this year. Just two arguments I have truly regretted what I said. I have a transiting Pluto square natal mars right now so I think that affects me. But I also have a transiting Pluto sextile Pluto at the same time. In general, I hold my tongue and always take the high road but occasionally I slip up. I am a Scorpio Asc with Pluto in my 12th in Scorpio. Venus and Chiron are in my eighth. I'd say most of my life, before whatever transits Im going through right now, I have always put others feelings before my own. IP: Logged |
anno_lucis
Knowflake Posts: 44
From: uk
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted August 08, 2012 08:09 AM
lol not really, no.holding anything "in" doesnt really feel healthy to me - perhaps because of mars opposing. over a period of time it demands transformation and if my partner does not confront the issues pluto is highlighting (usually the more deep seated, psychological, do-not-want type issues that no one in their right mind wants to face lol) sooner or later, for better or for worse, it will be over. it pretty much kills happiness for me on a regular basis but i cant help it lol i think the square it makes to jupiter in 4th means i can over do it especially at home so living with me is what does it lol. it must get draining pretty quick. i guess i enjoy confronting my own issues so didn't really understand people who don't want to become better/more whole. esp in the context of a relationship. i just enjoy uncovering issues and trying to help them/us evolve together. unfortunately, and understandably, the help is not always gratefully received lol but i am conscious of over doing it now. definitely wont make the same mistake again...not after the last one...some things you just cant fix.
IP: Logged |
beckylee
Knowflake Posts: 37
From: japan
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted August 08, 2012 09:24 AM
I have sun , saturn and pluto in scorpio in 5th house.I do hold it back. I don't hold it back with my family. Or with my boyfriend. But other with people, my anger turns into a big disappointment. I end up hurting myself. It's not healthy, I agree  IP: Logged |
frankie2912
Knowflake Posts: 724
From: yep,ks,usa
Registered: Apr 2011
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posted August 08, 2012 09:31 AM
Ohh yes..I have Pluto in Scorpio conj my ASC. I can really put people off if I don't watch it. I freak some people out. Thank gods I have Venus in my 1st house..that really saves my ass sometimes lol IP: Logged |
mir
Knowflake Posts: 828
From:
Registered: May 2009
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posted August 08, 2012 09:59 AM
Holding-yourself-back is (to me) like a tidal wave that is going to grow year by year. You even don't have to be aware of your own 'restraint' is the scary part.
The result can be anything from monumental eruptions one day to cheating or a divorce seemingly out-of-nowhwere.
It's like the energy we keep inside HAS to find its way out. The older you get the more vulnerable and the more you literally feel your nerves connected with such behavior and so finally you do not seem to have any choice left is what I would say.Pluto is only making soft aspects to my Venus/Jupiter/Neptune but it's exactly on my Sun/Moon midpoint.
Scorpio-Moon/IC/Jupiter also btw. IP: Logged |
geea
Knowflake Posts: 124
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted August 16, 2012 02:02 PM
yes and no. I do it with my close ones but with people who deserve it, i'll make no effort to hold it back. I have pluto in my 1st house scorp, mars in 8th house gem/scorpio duad.IP: Logged |
anonymidarkness
Knowflake Posts: 35
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 02:12 PM
Scorpio ascendant,pluto in first,moon in 8th here,also have plenty of squares to my pluto.I can hold it back.I also dont really show my anger to those I am not close to.Most of the time if I have to be harsh with a person I already plan it before hand.I can be pretty harsh with my words as well.I do have that ability to really hurt the person with few words.Most of the time I feel quite guilty if I sink to their level. IP: Logged |
hannaramaa
Knowflake Posts: 2088
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 16, 2012 02:31 PM
The most direct aspect I have is moon opposition pluto. Moon at 9.55 degrees, and Pluto at 14 something in the 5th house. I don't hold back Pluto with my family at all, but everyone else yes. I don't think my words can hurt my family anymore, I've said everything you can possibly say to your parents and then some and it just doesn't shock anybody anymore. Plus, I'm older and more educated and able to verbalize my emotions better. IP: Logged |
Aeline
Knowflake Posts: 325
From:
Registered: Jun 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 03:11 PM
I do most of the time. I have so many things to say that would hurt that person, and i know it. But something stops me. I haven't turned it down, however, with my parents and i regret it.Pluto in Scorpio, conjunct POF, square Moon, a water singleton. IP: Logged |
ail221
Knowflake Posts: 811
From: Mary Margaret Blanchard's home
Registered: Feb 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 03:35 PM
Pluto in Scorpio 6th house, Uranus and Neptune in 8th house, Mercury Square Pluto and MC, Pluto trine Jupiter and Chiron, Pluto sextile Neptune, Pluto descendant, BML in Scorpio 6th house trine Sun, Opposite Moon and ASC, and Juno in Scorpio 7th house.Sometimes yes, I know exactly what to say to people close to me if I REALLY want to hurt them. When I was younger I use to hold back or not say anything at all but keeping those emotions in can make you yourself feel ill. I just have moments when I just explode on people not consistently though just when I can't take it anymore. IP: Logged |
CRCRINCON
Knowflake Posts: 41
From: CA, USA
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 03:44 PM
Sun in 8th
Venus in 8th and depending on the style chart, Mars and Mercury in 8th. Mercury conjunct Mars. I can argue forever when I feel like it. But I'm rarley malicious. I am extemely expressive and don't hold back and this can be hurtful to people. I don't think before I speak often. But there is something in me that is intrigued by those who are very dark and malicious...it can draw me in... IP: Logged |
teasel
Knowflake Posts: 4723
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted August 16, 2012 04:33 PM
I never really had anything to hold back in the past. I do now, though, and I don't do so well with it. I sink to their level, and then feel guilty when they cry - even if they've taken great joy in digging at me.Pluto is transiting my 3rd. You would think that Neptune on my planets would lessen the urge, wouldn't you? It doesn't. IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 3635
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted August 16, 2012 04:42 PM
I do hold anger in and keep it to myself (at least, in public). I HATE conflict. I have to really feel secure with a person to bring up an issue if I have one: I have to feel like it will be worked out and like I can word it the right way, and also like the other person is open to meeting me halfway. It's rare that I will just say what I think.One of my personal goals is to be more assertive, but I also have a need to be liked and accepted: those two goals come into direct conflict. In all honesty, if I had my way, I would be able to talk to people when there is a problem and fix it. I've been lucky to be able to do this with some people. I hate conflict, though. Negative conflict (i.e., when things can't be made right) is like having a rare, precious, expensive, beautiful vase, and it gets cracked. Even if you can glue it back together, it will never have value again. You could never resell it for what it was originally worth; you'd have to take a loss. You can't display it, because it's ugly and broken and falling apart. It will never be the same as it was before no matter what you do. My preferred state is just to get along with everyone and have everyone be happy. IP: Logged |
Sorcha
Knowflake Posts: 350
From:
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 08:23 PM
quote:
Originally posted by anno_lucis:
lol not really, no.holding anything "in" doesnt really feel healthy to me - perhaps because of mars opposing. over a period of time it demands transformation and if my partner does not confront the issues pluto is highlighting (usually the more deep seated, psychological, do-not-want type issues that no one in their right mind wants to face lol) sooner or later, for better or for worse, it will be over. it pretty much kills happiness for me on a regular basis but i cant help it lol i think the square it makes to jupiter in 4th means i can over do it especially at home so living with me is what does it lol. it must get draining pretty quick. i guess i enjoy confronting my own issues so didn't really understand people who don't want to become better/more whole. esp in the context of a relationship. i just enjoy uncovering issues and trying to help them/us evolve together. unfortunately, and understandably, the help is not always gratefully received lol but i am conscious of over doing it now. definitely wont make the same mistake again...not after the last one...some things you just cant fix.
I can really relate to this a lot. I can do it if I am not living with someone, but if I am in a relationship, then it feels almost impossible. I too have learned from my mistakes, but one of those mistakes is not to fall in love with someone (and consequently move in with them) if they are not as interested in personal transformation as I am - in their own way, of course. To clarify, as long as you are doing your work and I am doing mine and we support one another in that, fabulous. Otherwise, I am going to end up a crazy cat lady for sure.
IP: Logged |
redshift
Knowflake Posts: 184
From:
Registered: Jul 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 09:32 PM
Scorpio sun. Pluto has the most strength in my chart. I hold myself back all the time, endlessly. My whole life I have, since I can remember. My first memory of childhood is feeling like I needed to throttle back the intensity and it is a great source of sadness for me. It finds its way out, usually turned inward. I end up hurting more than anyone else. One day, I will figure out how to let it out and use it for good.ETA the holding back I must say, is not holding back being evil, it's just holding back being too intense. It really seems to make people uncomfortable. And holding back reactions: love, anger, hurt...I have to be careful to modify and lighten them for everyone. I don't feel evil or dangerous at all. In fact I bend over backward not to be. IP: Logged |
alaz7200
Knowflake Posts: 264
From:
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 10:11 PM
I believe it takes a lot to truly "hold your Pluto back". That would call for some 12th House action in your chart.However, as someone with Venus conjunct Pluto in Scorpio, I can certainly attest to feeling that the only ones on this Earth capable of comprehending my emotional depth are fellow Plutonians. Therefore, I don't waste my time "entertaining" the hodgepodge most non-Plutonians seem to project onto me, for I simply render it beneath my "Pluto Code of Conduct", if you will. Plutonain energy is quite simply too intense and overwhelming to those without a prominent Pluto. This could be seen by some as "holding my Pluto back", but it's actually just choosing (and very selectively, in true Pluto fashion!) when and with whom to allow my Pluto its full wrath. Do you, or anyone else here, concur with this? IP: Logged |
anonymidarkness
Knowflake Posts: 35
From:
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted August 16, 2012 10:36 PM
quote:
Originally posted by alaz7200:
This could be seen by some as "holding my Pluto back", but it's actually just choosing (and very selectively, in true Pluto fashion!) when and with whom to allow my Pluto its full wrath.Do you, or anyone else here, concur with this?
I agree with that part,its choosing rather than holding back.IP: Logged |
popcorn
Knowflake Posts: 2972
From:
Registered: Aug 2009
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posted August 17, 2012 03:53 AM
So good all of you are. Ive problem hold pluto back. My moon in wide orb in square to pluto which also in exactly parallel to my moon. My feelings moon in square challenge my mind mercury conj uranus conj pluto all the time. I cant hold back. My feelings and mind always explode out on events. Im always on my mind on an bigger and bigger project. My feelings trigg me. My saturn in square and opp help me so I atleast think two times before I start anything new..IP: Logged |
Faith
Knowflake Posts: 2080
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted August 17, 2012 08:19 AM
quote:
Originally posted by mir:
Holding-yourself-back is (to me) like a tidal wave that is going to grow year by year. You even don't have to be aware of your own 'restraint' is the scary part.
The result can be anything from monumental eruptions one day to cheating or a divorce seemingly out-of-nowhwere.
It's like the energy we keep inside HAS to find its way out. The older you get the more vulnerable and the more you literally feel your nerves connected with such behavior and so finally you do not seem to have any choice left is what I would say.
IP: Logged |
anno_lucis
Knowflake Posts: 44
From: uk
Registered: Mar 2012
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posted August 17, 2012 11:54 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Sorcha:
I can really relate to this a lot. I can do it if I am not living with someone, but if I am in a relationship, then it feels almost impossible. I too have learned from my mistakes, but one of those mistakes is not to fall in love with someone (and consequently move in with them) if they are not as interested in personal transformation as I am - in their own way, of course. To clarify, as long as you are doing your work and I am doing mine and we support one another in that, fabulous. Otherwise, I am going to end up a crazy cat lady for sure.
haha, yes. lesson learned the hard way, for me. much more selective in my choice of partner especially now i have the knowledge of astrology behind me - no one escapes the zodiac test!! with the last i fell for him over a period of time (i was blindsided by his taurus, slow and steady approach - my mars is in taurus) our saturns were opposing (which feels like getting drawn into an unavoidable black hole) so i'm hoping there were some valuable lessons learned for us both, even without my unwarranted plutonian prompts. i have the foresight of astrology now, thankfully. so conscious evolution with a partner who isn't a total wing-nut would be a preferable start for me, but failing that: cats ftw. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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