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Author Topic:   Do Virgos Ever Forgive and Forget ?
beckylee
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From: japan
Registered: Jun 2012

posted April 17, 2013 10:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for beckylee     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Like I wrote here earlier, we only spent 6 days together, we had known each other only for a month, he didn't seem that serious to me so I dated another guy and when I told him this he was very upset, he almost broke up with me.

We will meet again next week, and these are texts he sent me today

'i was so happy with you too

i really wanted you to be my wife - no joke
now i need time to trust you again

but the truth is simple - you dont care and never cared about me. you just liked spend time with me, thats all. your love was coming with me and leaving when i closed the door.'

What am I supposed to do or say to make him know I do care A LOT ? I'm a scorpio and he is a virgo with gemini moon and a lot of virgo..

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Doux RÍve
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posted April 17, 2013 10:55 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Doux RÍve     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
And you are the Scorpio, here?!
Sounds like guilt-tripping.

I'm sorry, but if you've only known each other for a month.. how can he even speak about love or marriage? A bit hasty, in my opinion.

Also, he has a Gemini Moon which usually makes people eloquent and very easy with words - he can express himself easily through words but don't automatically assume that his heart is 100% in it. Plus some of them fall in love very easily. I'm not saying he is a liar, but Gemini folks can say something one day and genuinely mean it, and then change their minds completely, very fast. They are usually sincere people, really, but they do live in the moment and their moods change easily.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is this: he may like you a lot, and of course he's hurt by what you did, but don't take it too seriously and just kindly explain him your situation. If you really like him, tell him that you'd like to spend time with him but that you need some time to get to know each other better before moving forward.

One guy I know who has a Virgo Sun and a Gemini Moon had no trouble telling one of his friends that he loved her and wanted to be with her and when the girl backed off, he got over it very quickly and actually fell in love with another girl and is now chasing her. Some people can be quite flighty, so be careful with your own heart. People who play the victim are not that easily broken!

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Doux RÍve
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posted April 17, 2013 11:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Doux RÍve     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh and, to answer your original question: yes, yes they do. All the ones I've known can forgive (not really forget though) if they care enough.

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beckylee
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From: japan
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posted April 17, 2013 11:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for beckylee     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thanks for the advice

You are right about gemini moons. Maybe he is not as heart broken as he says.

I don't trust people easily. I assumed when he told me he felt I was the one on the second day that he was just saying this to be kind and to make me happy. And he told me a bunch of other stuff, and made promises.. But we never had a serious talk.

He says if I really loved him, I wouldn't date another guy whether we were serious or not. In fact, I dated someone else to make sure that I wasn't getting carried away this guy. I was falling for him and I was scared.

Do you think I suck at romance ?

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Doux RÍve
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posted April 17, 2013 11:47 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Doux RÍve     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Aw, of course you don't, honey! Why would you say such a thing!

Have you told him about it? That you were falling and got scared? And that's why you went out with someone else?

I know it sounds a bit weird but what can you do, it's done now, and maybe it wasn't a very "smart" move so to speak, but we all act in strange ways sometimes and it's okay as long as you learn something from it.

Also, keep in mind that manipulating someone in order to get a reaction out of them is not good news. And that's what your guy is doing. That's not cool of him, because it makes you feel bad and the power all goes to him.

If you are already feeling anxious/bad about it all, take time to think about it in more depth and decide whether or not this is something you really want to throw yourself in.

And remember that people should be adding value to your life, so try to befriend people who bring the best out of you and make you want to grow and be happy.

For now, I'd advise you to try and talk to him seriously and clear things out. If it works and you guys get together, make it clear that you won't put up with accusing/manipulative behaviour.

Good luck!

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depth
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posted April 17, 2013 12:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for depth     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I say similar things to my partner to make him feel guilty & apologize for hurting me & shower me with more attention and affection.
A few romantic assuring words, hug and quality time would do.

But it's different if I catch you with someonelse & you're new in my life. I'd forgive but it would take a lot of work & time to regain the trust! I might assume you're playing & not worth investment.

Talking things out in person helps the most. I guess there's nothing more you can do. virgo moon.

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Xiiro
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posted April 17, 2013 12:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Xiiro     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Sounds like the Gemini Moon getting its jollies out of torturing you.

Virgo is a generally forgiving sign in my opinion. She bases her decisions on evidence and if the evidence of you liking him overcomes the evidence of you being interested in others, he will eventually come around.

That Moon though is prone to playing emotional games just to get emotional reactions. With some Gemini Moons, drama is an indication of emotional connection.

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GemNymph
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posted April 17, 2013 12:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GemNymph     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
No offense, but I think you need to let this guy go and move on. This sounds manipulative: "I really wanted you to be my wife"--has he asked you at all about what YOU want in life? Did he express this to you before? Yet he's already shaming you with the "You could have been my wife" thing and telling you that YOU lost HIS trust. He's playing with your emotions and fears of social rejection to try to keep you an available option for him. Unless he expressed his feelings BEFORE this, just assume whatever he's saying is insincere. I know that's harsh but trust me on this. Virgo with Gem moon with a lot of Virgo? I'm a Gem, with a lot of Gem, a Pisces moon and Virgo rising. I understand how people with a lot of mutable energy are. They are fickle, unreliable and prone to be very shallow, and in turn, treat people in very superficial ways. Don't trust this guy unless he can show you he's more than that. And don't let him shame you! He hardly knows you!

I don't want to presume too much, but your profile says you're from Japan and I understand that in Japanese culture, there's a lot of pressure on women to fit certain roles and to please men--not that we American women don't deal with that (we certainly do. all the time) but my experience with Japanese friends has taught me that for a Japanese woman, these pressures can be pretty harsh, leaving the woman feeling like she doesn't have many options. I worry this guy is trying to use these cultural norms against you, to make you fear that you just missed out of a chance to get married and that you should feel worried about that. Please don't. Maybe you did miss out on a chance to get married--to the wrong man! That he says he wanted you to be his wife is nice, but it doesn't mean he's the right guy for you. He doesn't seem to care about your feelings or whether he would be a good husband to you, and that is worrisome. Has he said anything like "I want to show you I would be a good husband for you" or "I want you to know I care about what you feel too"? No? Then forget about him!

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jellyfishtry
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posted April 17, 2013 01:36 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Beckylee....as someone with a lot of Virgo in them to (though no Gemeni at all...) this is my perspective from my experience.

Sometimes it takes just a day for me to feel something intense with someone, even if i know they're only available for a short while, as sometimes the higher self and your own intuition do know better.
At other time i spent a whole year with someone and the feeling with very mild and bland, nothing special at all.

so in other words, we can fall in love so easily and so quickly...but if we don't feel anything, then good luck trying to get us to change our minds/feeling, it's not something anyone can control.

however after saying all that, this guy is mad!! like cuckoo mad....i would not want to be with someone who was so much quicker at showing anger than he was at showing compassion!! there's something really off about it! just remember that his 'feelings' and 'thoughts' are not your responsibility and no reason for him to make it seem like it is!
ps(yes forgive...forget...tougher than one would think...if you forget it's as if you are asking the universe to teach you whatever karmic lesson again)

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themischievousone
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posted April 17, 2013 07:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for themischievousone     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by beckylee:
Like I wrote here earlier, we only spent 6 days together, we had known each other only for a month, he didn't seem that serious to me so I dated another guy and when I told him this he was very upset, he almost broke up with me.

We will meet again next week, and these are texts he sent me today

'i was so happy with you too

i really wanted you to be my wife - no joke
now i need time to trust you again

but the truth is simple - you dont care and never cared about me. you just liked spend time with me, thats all. your love was coming with me and leaving when i closed the door.'

What am I supposed to do or say to make him know I do care A LOT ? I'm a scorpio and he is a virgo with gemini moon and a lot of virgo..


This sounds a lot like my ex.

But first to answer your question, do virgos ever forgive and forget? Being a virgo sun (and gemini moon) - forgive? yes forget? nope.

One of my exes (Leo sun, gemini moon but virgo asc, mars, mercury, venus - so lots of virgo) pulled that crap on me (key word- *crap*). It didn't seem serious, he wasn't around much. We went out a few times, that's it. After a while, I decided to trying the dating scene....for him to get very upset and tell me things along the same lines. The similarities in signs and words are quite odd lol.

Personally, I would run far, far away.

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StarlightSmileSupreme
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From: neptune
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posted April 17, 2013 08:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StarlightSmileSupreme     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by beckylee:
Like I wrote here earlier, we only spent 6 days together, we had known each other only for a month, he didn't seem that serious to me so I dated another guy and when I told him this he was very upset, he almost broke up with me.

We will meet again next week, and these are texts he sent me today

'i was so happy with you too

i really wanted you to be my wife - no joke
now i need time to trust you again

but the truth is simple - you dont care and never cared about me. you just liked spend time with me, thats all. your love was coming with me and leaving when i closed the door.'

What am I supposed to do or say to make him know I do care A LOT ? I'm a scorpio and he is a virgo with gemini moon and a lot of virgo..



Just let him know and send him emails or instant messages everyday. Talk to him on the phone. Stay in touch with him. He will realize you are serious! Virgo can be very serious about stuff like this and not want to play around. It is the sign of everything pure and true so Virgos can feel lost when someone they love goes out with someone else and Virgos can fall in love early on, too.

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mir
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posted April 17, 2013 09:01 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mir     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Just let him know and send him emails or instant messages everyday. Talk to him on the phone. Stay in touch with him. He will realize you are serious! Virgo can be very serious about stuff like this and not want to play around. It is the sign of everything pure and true so Virgos can feel lost when someone they love goes out with someone else and Virgos can fall in love early on, too.

Yess.

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k e p h x i
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From: St. Paul, MN, USA
Registered: Mar 2013

posted April 17, 2013 09:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for k e p h x i     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
No.

------------------
Rising: Virgo
Sun: _____
Moon: _____

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Kerosene
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posted April 17, 2013 09:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kerosene     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Most virgos are able to forgive if they are mature enough.
Even thou Virgo is an earth sign its silled ruled by mercury which is light hearted energy.

I've never had problems with virgos in that department, virgo influenced by planets other than mercury are well debatable.

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StarlightSmileSupreme
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posted April 17, 2013 09:19 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StarlightSmileSupreme     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by k e p h x i:
No.


She might have not been sure at first but I think she is sure about him now and hopes he will give her another chance. No one is perfect.

We should all learn the valuable lessons of forgiveness. Of kindness. Of mercy.

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DrewMann
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posted April 17, 2013 10:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DrewMann     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Speaking as a virgo, scorpio moon the answer is: NO!!!!!!!!

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beckylee
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From: japan
Registered: Jun 2012

posted April 18, 2013 08:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for beckylee     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you for all the advice guys !

We talked on the phone for 1.5 hours. He says our relationship was serious enough for me not to be dating or kissing another guy. I explained him my point of view, but he says although he still likes me, he has too much pride and ego to let it go. I think I understand him I did the same thing to someone I loved out of my pride once in the past. Maybe it's karma.

He is a bit manipulative, but overall a sweet guy. We will still be seeing each other, try to keep things lighter. I asked him if he was planning a revenge but he said he would never do that kind of thing. Actually I don't know if I can keep things light because I still have strong feelings for him. I guess we will see.

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beckylee
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posted April 18, 2013 08:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for beckylee     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
It's very very sad for me though. I was quite obsessed with him. I thought he was just my type, maybe because my mars was conjunct his venus and sun.

He just went on and on about how much he thinks about me, and how he had told about me to his friends and family, showing my pictures before he found out I dated someone else .. He was complimenting me the whole time we were on the phone. And yet he said how it couldn't be the same. I told him to stop. This was bringing me down, but I don't know, I think he is sweet, and has a good heart.

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mir
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posted April 18, 2013 10:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for mir     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yes this is verrry sad. And a big lesson for the next time when you meet someone you really like. I completely understand your guy, my trust would also be gone. Not because I *want* it, but just because it's a feeling that you can't wipe away.
Relationships/love.. an area where you have to be soooo careful, which normally takes a few hard lessons before you become truly aware of it and only those are truly worth your love.

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neilthecellist
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posted April 18, 2013 03:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for neilthecellist     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by k e p h x i:
No.


Actually yes. Underdeveloped Virgos say no. As it has been stated, Virgo is governed by Mercury and is light hearted energy. It can be restructured at will to grow and develop. Failure to develop means the subject/native is too focused on the basic individual rather than the higher self.

To the OP: Tell him to MAN UP, JEEZ. MARRIAGE after dating you for less than 30 days? Seriously? Or better yet, walk away, he's clearly not in the best state of mind (or heart) to be dating.

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StarlightSmileSupreme
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posted April 18, 2013 03:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StarlightSmileSupreme     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by neilthecellist:
Actually yes. Underdeveloped Virgos say no. As it has been stated, Virgo is governed by Mercury and is light hearted energy. It can be restructured at will to grow and develop. Failure to develop means the subject/native is too focused on the basic individual rather than the higher self.

To the OP: Tell him to MAN UP, JEEZ. MARRIAGE after dating you for less than 30 days? Seriously? Or better yet, walk away, he's clearly not in the best state of mind (or heart) to be dating.


That's what I thought, too. It's so early. Why not forgive her and she sounds nice, too.

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neilthecellist
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posted April 18, 2013 03:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for neilthecellist     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by StarlightSmileSupreme:
That's what I thought, too. It's so early. Why not forgive her and she sounds nice, too.

Forgive who and why? The OP is a female, the person she's talking about is male.

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StarlightSmileSupreme
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posted April 18, 2013 04:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for StarlightSmileSupreme     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by neilthecellist:
Forgive who and why? The OP is a female, the person she's talking about is male.

Oh, sorry, wasn't clear. The Virgo guy forgive the Scorpio girl for going out on a date when they first got together.

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neilthecellist
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posted April 18, 2013 04:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for neilthecellist     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by StarlightSmileSupreme:
Oh, sorry, wasn't clear. The Virgo guy forgive the Scorpio girl for going out on a date when they first got together.

Oh, ok got it. Thanks for clarifying!

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Nine
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posted April 18, 2013 06:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nine     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I had a budding relationship with a Virgo once. Sadly they found themselves on the wrong side of a vicious political battle in the workplace.

"Whatever I did I'm sorry," said the Virgo-Capricorn/Scorpio Asc. This after I'd ground 'em down in a long & drawn out cold war. "Not accepted!!" said this Gemini.

To answer your question, Yes - Virgos can forgive and forget.

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