posted June 23, 2013 02:52 AM            

That is just a tendency , or else pluto /venus manifest in a different way to change oneself.

posted June 23, 2013 01:29 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aquacheeka:
Sagittarius moon guys are your best bet if you want a guy who likes interracial relationships. Taurus and Cancer moon guys are best if you want a guy who wants a curvy woman.

I think you should go for Sag moon, it works nicely with your Leo moon.

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Thanks. I mean i did go for a Sag moon(Leo guy), he started being shady(Moon opp Venus) so idk now,

posted June 23, 2013 01:41 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by HannieBananie:

Also i feel threatened by other models and the society prefers VERY light black girls, ones who look Latina. That's not the case with me, even though my dad was biracial.

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my post will have nothing to do with astrology....
so, here it goes:

first, you may want to avoid judging your worth based on the media and western standards of beauty...because, it is not going to change, lighter women have/will always be considered as being more beautiful than darker-skinned women in western society....that's just the way it is.
so what to do? ignore it, and find the worth within you, work on your confidence and self-esteem.
this also means...avoid certain topics that seem to make you a victim or victimize you, i come across plenty of sites....about how dark-skinned girls are less attractive, at the bottom of the food chain, how nobody wants them... and so on. this is not positive either, imo, it actually builds an inferiority-complex, and aggravates issues of colorism where the light-skinned blacks are pitted against the darker ones, not good.
on the other hand, never feel that you need a light-skinned man to make you feel validated. do you understand what i mean? because there are plenty of minority women who do this...it is like, "if he dates me, then, i am beautiful/as beautiful as (the ideal beauty) white woman"

my best friend is like you, im asian, we've argued...sometimes horribly about this topic, whereas she is relegated as being masculine, loud, dumb...even though she is gorgeous and extremely intelligent, im the one who is judged as the perfect model minority because apparently, asian women are automatically smart and traditional-submissive china dolls, and...oh my...have i been fetishized/objectified by certain (usually white) men, and...even expected to serve them...because, apparently, we know how to make (white) men feel like men *cough*

so, even though i dont understand her experiences, i can still comprehend the discomfort of your skin color/ethnicity being the default determinant in terms of attractiveness, behavior, etc...which is something that all non-white women understand very well.

posted June 23, 2013 01:44 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hikoro:
my post will have nothing to do with astrology....
so, here it goes:

first, you may want to avoid judging your worth based on the media and western standards of beauty...because, it is not going to change, lighter women have/will always be considered as being more beautiful than darker-skinned women in western society....that's just the way it is.
so what to do? ignore it, and find the worth within you, work on your confidence and self-esteem.
this also means...avoid certain topics that seem to make you a victim or victimize you, i come across plenty of sites....about how dark-skinned girls are less attractive, at the bottom of the food chain, how nobody wants them... and so on. this is not positive either, imo, it actually builds an inferiority-complex, and aggravates issues of colorism where the light-skinned blacks are pitted against the darker ones, not good.
on the other hand, never feel that you need a light-skinned man to make you feel validated. do you understand what i mean? because there are plenty of minority women who do this...it is like, "if he dates me, then, i am beautiful/as beautiful as (the ideal beauty) white woman"

my best friend is like you, im asian, we've argued...sometimes horribly about this topic, whereas she is relegated as being masculine, loud, dumb...even though she is gorgeous and extremely intelligent, im the one who is judged as the perfect model minority because apparently, asian women are automatically smart and traditional-submissive china dolls, and...oh my...have i been fetishized/objectified by certain (usually white) men, and...even expected to serve them...because, apparently, we know how to make (white) men feel like men *cough*

so, even though i dont understand her experiences, i can still comprehend the discomfort of your skin color/ethnicity being the default determinant in terms of attractiveness, behavior, etc...which is something that all non-white women understand very well.

i hope this helped you somehow...
and, get to travel, not all countries and men are the same.
in terms of women and skin color, for example, i find north american men (especially american) far more racial and prone to racialise (sp?) and being influenced by the media...
western european men, not as much.
also...you may want to go to italy and eastern europe....with your looks, you will need a men repellent over there. lol

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Thanks, but now i found love with a Canadian Taurus.

posted June 23, 2013 05:09 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hikoro:
first, you may want to avoid judging your worth based on the media and western standards of beauty...because, it is not going to change, lighter women have/will always be considered as being more beautiful than darker-skinned women in western society....that's just the way it is.
so what to do? ignore it, and find the worth within you, work on your confidence and self-esteem.
this also means...avoid certain topics that seem to make you a victim or victimize you, i come across plenty of sites....about how dark-skinned girls are less attractive, at the bottom of the food chain, how nobody wants them... and so on. this is not positive either, imo, it actually builds an inferiority-complex, and aggravates issues of colorism where the light-skinned blacks are pitted against the darker ones, not good.
on the other hand, never feel that you need a light-skinned man to make you feel validated. do you understand what i mean? because there are plenty of minority women who do this...it is like, "if he dates me, then, i am beautiful/as beautiful as (the ideal beauty) white woman"

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This was really interesting to me. Personally, I would amend it to say, "Don't feel like you need a man, period, to make you feel validated" and leave out the ethnic portion.
I don't really like the notion or implication that a woman of colour who dates a man lighter in skintone is automatically racked with self-hatred. The reality is that if you are living in a country where your ethnicity is 2% of the population, you have to be open to dating men of all types, so it's actually a huge disservice to put that on a woman, you know?
That's not to say that it's necessarily healthy to exclusively pursue one type of guy, but I don't think it's any healthier to exclude one type, either.

posted June 23, 2013 05:28 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Aquacheeka:
This was really interesting to me. Personally, I would amend it to say, "Don't feel like you need a man, period, to make you feel validated" and leave out the ethnic portion.
I don't really like the notion or implication that a woman of colour who dates a man lighter in skintone is automatically racked with self-hatred. The reality is that if you are living in a country where your ethnicity is 2% of the population, you have to be open to dating men of all types, so it's actually a huge disservice to put that on a woman, you know?
That's not to say that it's necessarily healthy to exclusively pursue one type of guy, but I don't think it's any healthier to exclude one type, either.

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i never implied that it was self-hatred, you're the one jumping into that assumption...

just as there are people who unconsciously use others because of their status, money in order to gain validation...there are also people who unconsciously use others for their skin color in order to get validation...it happens...and more so, by those who have very low esteem and lack confidence about their looks and socio-economic background...

posted June 23, 2013 05:30 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by HannieBananie:
Thanks, but now i found love with a Canadian Taurus.

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posted June 23, 2013 05:45 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hikoro:

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Yee just he always says that if i was thinner[ i only got curves] i'd be hot . What's with white guys and skinny girls? TF.

posted June 23, 2013 06:19 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by HannieBananie:
Yee just he always says that if i was thinner[ i only got curves] i'd be hot . What's with white guys and skinny girls? TF.

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dump him and find yourself someone who appreciates your body :P...but, to explain and this is my theory...

he is still externalizing/projecting the standards of beauty that he is used to, onto you...
it is like, the white men, who to black women say something like: "you're so pretty, you have a "white nose", not a "black nose", you're like european"....get what i mean? as a friend told me: 'it is like they find white women looks dipped in chocolate pretty'.
or, they salivate over angelina jolie's lips and jessica biel's arse, but in a black woman, these qualities are not judged as attractive.

posted June 23, 2013 06:58 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hikoro:
dump him and find yourself someone who appreciates your body :P...but, to explain and this is my theory...

he is still externalizing/projecting the standards of beauty that he is used to, onto you...
it is like, the white men, who to black women say something like: "you're so pretty, you have a "white nose", not a "black nose", you're like european"....get what i mean? as a friend told me: 'it is like they find white women looks dipped in chocolate pretty'.
or, they salivate over angelina jolie's lips and jessica biel's arse, but in a black woman, these qualities are not judged as attractive.

maybe, he is still having a hard time seeing you from being a 'black chick' to 'a chick that happens to be black, smart, funny, etc'
when he sees you as the latter, a lot of his preconceived ideas as to beauty and race should be gone, when he learns to love you for who you are in the inside...

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Yeah Thanks so much Hikoro!. I'm Part Belgian plus i'm born there but i live in Canada sine i was a baby so yeah

posted June 23, 2013 08:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by hikoro:
dump him and find yourself someone who appreciates your body :P...but, to explain and this is my theory...

he is still externalizing/projecting the standards of beauty that he is used to, onto you...
it is like, the white men, who to black women say something like: "you're so pretty, you have a "white nose", not a "black nose", you're like european"....get what i mean? as a friend told me: 'it is like they find white women looks dipped in chocolate pretty'.
or, they salivate over angelina jolie's lips and jessica biel's arse, but in a black woman, these qualities are not judged as attractive.

maybe, he is still having a hard time seeing you from being a 'black chick' to 'a chick that happens to be black, smart, funny, etc'
when he sees you as the latter, a lot of his preconceived ideas as to beauty and race should be gone, when he learns to love you for who you are in the inside...

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Thanks, but he still finds me hot and all it's just that he prefers thin girls because he's thin, he said that curves were okay but i still felt sad when he said he wanted a thin girl.