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Author Topic:   Don't kill me....
charlie
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From: los angeles, ca, USA
Registered: Jun 2012

posted June 29, 2013 10:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for charlie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
...but the older I get the more I think people pair best with their own "mode". Cardinal with Cardinal and Fixed with Fixed etc. It's just some type of a "glue" that binds them together. It might not be "roses and champagne" 24/7 but the glue will solve that.

Discuss!

Should add that I am turning 37 this year so I am not a "duckling"..

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Kerosene
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posted June 29, 2013 10:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kerosene     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I agree, at least with friendships that is.

I guess when you're older companionship is also important, not lust and passion as much?
idk lol.
Don't kill me either.

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charlie
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Posts: 820
From: los angeles, ca, USA
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posted June 29, 2013 10:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for charlie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Kerosene:
I agree, at least with friendships that is.

I guess when you're older companionship is also important, not lust and passion as much?
idk lol.
Don't kill me either.


I think that's what it is; companionship in all types of relationships! It's almost as if when the dust of youth has settled, it's time to come home and be with your own. It's been growing slowly within me the last few years but at the moment I feel very "home" with especially Libra and Aries.

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MsPrism
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posted June 29, 2013 10:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hm. . .

I wouldn't kill you anyways but haha are you talking about your Sun, Moon and/or Ascendant's common "mode" or are you talking about whatever "mode" is most common from all of your planets and angle placements?

I like doing little tests like this. Thank you for posting!

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Odette
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posted June 30, 2013 01:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Actually - I do agre...-ish..

I'm an Aries with a lot of Capricorn (cardinal) energy.
I pair extremely well with Libra men and quite well with Capricorns..
I couldn't see myself with a fellow Aries as more than just friends... and Cancers... *sigh* too emotional for me.. They drown my optimism.. so probably not.

But the men I've always had (and still have!) the best relationships with were Libra - cardinal.

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Odette
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posted June 30, 2013 01:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Although I have a feeling this is a bit like a mirage for people..
I know a bunch of people with Sun Signs in the same mode.. who ended up divorced quite quickly - after enthusiastically running off to the altar very young (including my parents: Leo/Aquarius!)..

These relationships can be exciting and they can last (they are not often short-lived)..
I'm just not sure that they can last forever and a day.. if you know what I mean

Second and third marriages are more likely to be with a trined Sun sign or a semi-sextile Sun sign... as far as I've observed. People calm down later in life.. and want more 'peace' LOL

quote:
I think that's what it is; companionship in all types of relationships! It's almost as if when the dust of youth has settled, it's time to come home and be with your own.

I disagree with this part.. because I've usually noticed a trend that is the exact opposite of what you're saying here.
I think there is more friction with your own mode... and it's easier to be with those of a trine/sextile/semi-sextile mode..
When young - people seem to seek out friction..

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Textbook
Knowflake

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From: Scotland
Registered: Jun 2013

posted June 30, 2013 02:03 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Textbook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
Although I have a feeling this is a bit like a mirage for people..
I know a bunch of people with Sun Signs in the same mode.. who ended up divorced quite quickly - after enthusiastically running off to the altar very young (including my parents: Leo/Aquarius!)..

These relationships can be exciting and they can last (they are not often short-lived)..
I'm just not sure that they can last forever and a day.. if you know what I mean

Second and third marriages are more likely to be with a trined Sun sign or a semi-sextile Sun sign... as far as I've observed. People calm down later in life.. and want more 'peace' LOL

I disagree with this part.. because I've usually noticed a trend that is the exact opposite of what you're saying here.
I think there is more friction with your own mode... and it's easier to be with those of a trine/sextile/semi-sextile mode..
When young - people seem to seek out friction..



This really flies in the face of most of the commentary I've seen here over time, that actually hard aspects in synastry are better than a crapload of trines.

and honestly I hate to admit it but I have to side with the "trines are bad" theory because in my direct experience it always worked out that one or both parties are kind of "nonchalant" and even kinda callous where the other is concerned. The energy exchange comes too easy so they don't value and appreciate the other person very much.

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MsPrism
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posted June 30, 2013 02:06 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
I think there is more friction with your own mode... and it's easier to be with those of a trine/sextile/semi-sextile mode..
When young - people seem to seek out friction..

This makes sense in my case. My first partner, when I was very young, I married and we are both Taurus Suns, Capricorn Moons. It is too much of the same thing to be comforting after years of being together. It might have been nice if our sun and moon were trine instead of conjunct eachother though.

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MsPrism
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posted June 30, 2013 02:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Textbook:

This really flies in the face of most of the commentary I've seen here over time, that actually hard aspects in synastry are better than a crapload of trines.

and honestly I hate to admit it but I have to side with the "trines are bad" theory because in my direct experience it always worked out that one or both parties are kind of "nonchalant" and even kinda callous with each other where the other is concerned. The energy exchange comes too easy so they don't value and appreciate the other person very much.


Actually I've seen a lot of people split about "easy aspects" and "hard aspects." It seems that some people can't stand a lot of squares, oppositions or even conjunctions and want more sextiles and trine action. Though some really dislike too much sextile/trine aspecting but thrive when there are more conjunctions/oppositions/squares.

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Textbook
Knowflake

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From: Scotland
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posted June 30, 2013 02:11 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Textbook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by MsPrism:
Actually I've seen a lot of people split about "easy aspects" and "hard aspects." It seems that some people can't stand a lot of squares, oppositions or even conjunctions and want more sextiles and trine action. Though some really dislike too much sextile/trine aspecting but thrive when there are more conjunctions/oppositions/squares.

I haven't. Both here and on other boards, 80 percent of the time people say hard aspects are better and make for more sparks and that trines lead to complacency and boredom.

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MsPrism
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posted June 30, 2013 02:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Textbook:
I haven't. Both here and on other boards, 80 percent of the time people say hard aspects are better and make for more sparks and that trines lead to complacency and boredom.

*shrug* I have.

80 percent of the time, it works EVERY time!

I think it's all just personal. Sometimes you find that someone conjuncting your Moon with maybe Pluto or Saturn, you dislike but with their Venus or Jupiter, you like. It's all just personal and something that might change depending on the person, the way they exert their energy etc. etc.

I don't think aspects are necessarily "bad" or "good" it's all on how the energy is used based on each individual.

For example, a trine is the ease of movement between the energies present. Though the movement forward could be revealing a secret you wished to keep or it could be finishing up a lengthy legal battle that has been draining you. One is perceived as "good" and one "bad" but essentially, it's the same energy. Only it's use was different.

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LionFish
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posted June 30, 2013 02:28 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for LionFish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Textbook:
I haven't. Both here and on other boards, 80 percent of the time people say hard aspects are better and make for more sparks and that trines lead to complacency and boredom.

This is only if there is too much similarity. Think about it, do you want to be with yourself for the rest of eternity?

If it was a Sun-Sun-Moon grand trine, or even Sun-Sun-Venus..or anything involving both person's sun signs might lead to complacency because it makes it easy to understand where the other is coming from.

The key to grand trines not ending in boredom are harder aspects lending "spark" or "interest" to the chart. Basically things that need to be worked towards or against. Nothing can bring two people closer than the ability to understand each other allowing them to join forces and defeat an intruding obstacle.

A chart comparison with all hard aspects will eventually prove too much for either person to handle. And on the other hand, if a chart comparison has all easy or at least neutral aspects the two people may have no need of each other because neither one presents a challenge.

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LionFish
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posted June 30, 2013 02:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for LionFish     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Also don't forget that we attract people that mirror our own natal chart in some way.. whether it be for good or ill.

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Textbook
Knowflake

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From: Scotland
Registered: Jun 2013

posted June 30, 2013 02:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Textbook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by MsPrism:
*shrug* I have.

80 percent of the time, it works EVERY time!

I think it's all just personal. Sometimes you find that someone conjuncting your Moon with maybe Pluto or Saturn, you dislike but with their Venus or Jupiter, you like. It's all just personal and something that might change depending on the person, the way they exert their energy etc. etc.

I don't think aspects are necessarily "bad" or "good" it's all on how the energy is used based on each individual.

For example, a trine is the ease of movement between the energies present. Though the movement forward could be revealing a secret you wished to keep or it could be finishing up a lengthy legal battle that has been draining you. One is perceived as "good" and one "bad" but essentially, it's the same energy. Only it's use was different.



Well we've seen two totally different things cuz I've seen the exact opposite stated on here a zillion times and on other astrology boards, too.

and having been in a synastry situation firsthand with someone where most of our planets trined each other I can tell you...I didn't want to agree but I have to agree with the typical view on this that they're bad. He was pretty much like "Whatever" toward me and felt like he could pretty much say or do whatever he wanted and seemed to be pretty nonchalant when it came to me as a person and making time for me. And it's not that we had "bad" planets trining each other I'm talking stuff like Moon-Venus, Moon-Sun, and a laundry list of other trines on top of Venus conjunct Mars.

Maybe that was a one-off freak incident I don't know, but until I can say for sure otherwise, I'm saying that I have to agree that trine-heavy synastry isn't all it's cracked up to be. Best relationship I had was with someone where there were a lot of conjunctions in the synastry, and the composite chart was riddled with squares. I should say here though that, when it was good, it was very good, but when things went south it got kinda...psychotic. On his end, mainly (his pluto lands on my Venus).

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Kerosene
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posted June 30, 2013 02:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kerosene     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yeah I end up friend zoning people I have too much trines with. Especially sun/moon trines & conjunctions.

I like them but don't really feel anything.. It's not electric.

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MsPrism
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posted June 30, 2013 02:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by LionFish:
A chart comparison with all hard aspects will eventually prove too much for either person to handle. And on the other hand, if a chart comparison has all easy or at least neutral aspects the two people may have no need of each other because neither one presents a challenge.

THIS. We all need to find that individual balance between easy and difficult.

Gotta get all Libra up in here!

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Textbook
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From: Scotland
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posted June 30, 2013 02:43 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Textbook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by MsPrism:
THIS. We all need to find that individual balance between easy and difficult.

Gotta get all Libra up in here!


I got four planets in Libra for what it's worth and I'm still coming down on the other side of the fence lmao.

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MsPrism
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posted June 30, 2013 02:50 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Textbook:
I got four planets in Libra for what it's worth and I'm still coming down on the other side of the fence lmao.

I only have my Descendant in Libra haha. I was just making a joke about the Libra scales.

I would dredge up the posts I've read to show my evidence but I honestly don't remember which threads they're in so it'd be a big job. Sorry about that. I kinda feel lazy now that I say it but oh wells!

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MsPrism
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posted June 30, 2013 02:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MsPrism     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by LionFish:
Think about it, do you want to be with yourself for the rest of eternity?

I LOVE how you made it seem like every relationship is eternity hahaha. You're the best!

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Textbook
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posted June 30, 2013 02:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Textbook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by LionFish:
This is only if there is too much similarity. Think about it, do you want to be with yourself for the rest of eternity?

If it was a Sun-Sun-Moon grand trine, or even Sun-Sun-Venus..or anything involving both person's sun signs might lead to complacency because it makes it easy to understand where the other is coming from.

The key to grand trines not ending in boredom are harder aspects lending "spark" or "interest" to the chart. Basically things that need to be worked towards or against. Nothing can bring two people closer than the ability to understand each other allowing them to join forces and defeat an intruding obstacle.

A chart comparison with all hard aspects will eventually prove too much for either person to handle. And on the other hand, if a chart comparison has all easy or at least neutral aspects the two people may have no need of each other because neither one presents a challenge.


Actually our suns square each other. His Saturn opposed my Venus, and other than that? It was one trine after another after another, with my venus conjunct his mars. I think there were more than a few trines in the composite too. Including both the sun and the moon being in water signs.

Similarity is more of a conjunction phenomenon. Trines mean harmony between the two planets involved. I actually had a conjunction-heavy relationship with someone like I mentioned in the last post, and, when it was good it was a sense of being on the same page without it feeling too similar or being boring. I didn't feel like I was dating myself at all. As I said though the composite was some nasty ish though and it did ultimately play out just like the composite indicated.

You kinda contradicted yourself too because at one point you say that trine-heavy relationship astrology can lead to a feeling of being too similar and complacency...but then half a sentence later you say it's good and that it unites people to keep outside forces out.

I will say this though - in the composite that was all squares, other people were able to easily get "in" the relationship and cause problems between us. Having said that, I'm not coming down in agreement that all trine synastry or composites are good either, because in that case...no one had to come in between us because he was doing it all on his own. I think at the end it had degraded to him saying to me in front of other people that he thought my breasts were asymmetrical and that I probably wouldn't give good b****s because, in his opinion, my mouth was too small.

So much for "trines are good". lmao

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Textbook
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posted June 30, 2013 02:55 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Textbook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by MsPrism:
I LOVE how you made it seem like every relationship is eternity hahaha. You're the best!

I didn't get that "Would you really want to be with someone exactly like yourself for eternity" comment honestly because the only way it would really feel like being with yourself for eternity anyway is if they were born in the same time and place as you and on the same date, thus giving them the exact same natal chart.

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Odette
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posted June 30, 2013 05:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
I hate to admit it but I have to side with the "trines are bad" theory

I think it really depends on age.

What I've noticed is.. people might get married or end up in a long-term relationship early-on in life.. in their 20s.. Often these relationships are with a partner who has planets in the same mode (and there is friction but also attrcation! mainly when it's the opposite sign).. These relationships last maybe.. 5-10 years. They are not short as I was saying - but they are not everlasting either.

When those same people are in their 30s or early 40s they may end up in a second relationship (or marriage) - which is *again* one of these "same-mode" types of relationships..
And again - it lasts maybe around 5 years (less than the first rel, because they are no longer as patient with the same BS).

Then finally when people get towards the later part of their middle-age years... or old age... like 50s, 60s, 70s and 80s... they are much more likely at those ages... to fall in love with a person they have trines/sextiles (and sometimes semi-sextiles) with and feel like that person was the love of their lives/their twin soul etc. - and then wonder WHY they didn't meet them when they were younger..

Although ^ this is ironic.. because - if they had met them when younger, they wouldn't have wanted the relationship at all (out of boredom.. because nice aspects seem too easy and 'meh' for a lot of young people).

Anyway ^ this is really just one pattern I noticed..
Different people have different patterns in life I guess.. But I have met a *bunch* with this kind of pattern... I'm not sure if it means anything. I didn't exactly research this lol

quote:
In my direct experience it always worked out that one or both parties are kind of "nonchalant" and even kinda callous where the other is concerned.

But were they in their 20s/30s... or in their 50s/60s?

The reason for the callousness is that they take the person for granted, when young... because they are too similar - and things are too easy.

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hikoro
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posted June 30, 2013 05:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hikoro     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^
@ odette..

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charlie
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Posts: 820
From: los angeles, ca, USA
Registered: Jun 2012

posted June 30, 2013 12:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for charlie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
Although I have a feeling this is a bit like a mirage for people..
I know a bunch of people with Sun Signs in the same mode.. who ended up divorced quite quickly - after enthusiastically running off to the altar very young (including my parents: Leo/Aquarius!)..

These relationships can be exciting and they can last (they are not often short-lived)..
I'm just not sure that they can last forever and a day.. if you know what I mean

Second and third marriages are more likely to be with a trined Sun sign or a semi-sextile Sun sign... as far as I've observed. People calm down later in life.. and want more 'peace' LOL

I disagree with this part.. because I've usually noticed a trend that is the exact opposite of what you're saying here.
I think there is more friction with your own mode... and it's easier to be with those of a trine/sextile/semi-sextile mode..
When young - people seem to seek out friction..


I have mostly dated signs trine my own up until now and they all ended because I felt there was no growth or progress. I am not old but I am over my infatuation period so I can safely say that trines bore me to tears.

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theunknown
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posted June 30, 2013 12:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for theunknown     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
when I was younger, I'd prefer fiery people (aligned with my moon sign) but as I get older, i prefer fixed, earth people (ascendant and sun sign).

This differs on individual basis because some people don't just have on predominant mode/element in their chart.

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