Author
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Topic: Equality in relationships
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meyray Knowflake Posts: 283 From: Registered: Oct 2012
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posted July 04, 2013 11:32 AM
Yes! I completely agree with this. Dominance and submission are fun in sexuality but they should stay there. A good partnership needs equality, balance and respect. To me a perfect partnership is a strong friendship first and foremost – the romantic love and sexual desire come after that.Ughh, I can’t stand the whole drama, seriousness and dogmatism when it comes to discussing relationships. It starts to sound like an ordeal rather than an adventure. Why can’t everything just be fun, easy and happy? Sagittarius DSC/ Scorpio Jupiter (6H) Scorpio Venus (6H) Leo Mars (4H)
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Blackbird Knowflake Posts: 83 From: Registered: Nov 2012
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posted July 04, 2013 08:05 PM
I thought this was a Libra thing -- the sign of balance. I have Mercury and Pluto in the last degrees of Libra.Oh, and about the D/S / BSDM thing... I haven't experienced it, on either side, but I think it sounds appalling. And I am a Scorpio. "lol wut? a scorpio that doesn't want to dominate in bed?" Yeah. That's me. Destroying stereotypes since 1983.
------------------ My natal chart IP: Logged |
charlie Knowflake Posts: 841 From: los angeles, ca, USA Registered: Jun 2012
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posted July 04, 2013 09:11 PM
quote: Originally posted by Blackbird: I thought this was a Libra thing -- the sign of balance. I have Mercury and Pluto in the last degrees of Libra.Oh, and about the D/S / BSDM thing... I haven't experienced it, on either side, but I think it sounds appalling. And I am a Scorpio. "lol wut? a scorpio that doesn't want to dominate in bed?" Yeah. That's me. Destroying stereotypes since 1983.
"Destroying stereotypes since 1983." LOL!! Funny as he11 IP: Logged |
enchantress299 Knowflake Posts: 672 From: Registered: May 2009
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posted July 04, 2013 11:57 PM
quote: Originally posted by Kerosene: yeaaah Me too, I have venus sextile Chiron. I didn't mind because I wanted to help... The relationships ended but at least I got them out of that crap they were in..Idk i felt like a social worker that was making out with my charges, it was kinda weird.
^^^ This. I also have 7th Chiron and Chrion square Sun/Venus. I have been in relationships where I felt like I was the counselor, and because that is also my profession, I just couldn't stay in them. I didn't want to go to work and then come home only to go back to work. It was stupid too, because it was difficult for me to understand why the other person couldn't just 'act like an adult' and deal with their own emotions. That's not a very fair assessment either, but I was tired of having their emotions projected onto me. Now I know how to spot it and I avoid it like the plague. I also want an 'equal' relationship, but I find that it can be difficult to find. I tend to think, in terms of astrology anyway, that mutable signs tend to be more equitable in their relationships. Fixed signs usually like traditional male/female roles. Cardinal signs usually like to be the leader (though not always depending on their Venus, Moon, Mars). That's MY theory anyway. I am highly mutable and I find that other mutable signs are more open minded and flexible like this. IP: Logged |
hikoro Knowflake Posts: 885 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 05, 2013 03:59 AM
i wonder... i must admit; how much of this is also responsibility of a partner who wants to improve and change the other person? or save damaged goods? something that women are more often guilty of, imo i just have to add another version of the story... 
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YoursTrulyAlways Knowflake Posts: 5364 From: Registered: Oct 2011
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posted July 05, 2013 08:27 AM
Of course, I'm the only one to disagree with almost everyone. Or with everyone, period. I absolutely don't care about equality. Relationships are based on mutual understanding, and what works for a couple is defined within the domain of the couple. I believe in the economic theory of comparative advantage. I'm good at cooking, and therefore I do all the cooking at home. She does all the baking. She manages the household and has absolute veto power over all household decisions, such as what the house looks like, the routinely family budget, and what the children wear. I make all the money, and I'm singularly better at it than 99% of two income American familes. I have veto power over all major financial decisions and big ticket expenditures. The marriage is approaching 20 years. On day one of the marriage, we agreed that she shouldn't work. It only messes up and complicates my income taxes and increases my tax liability. So, she stopped working and it improved our lives. IP: Logged |
hikoro Knowflake Posts: 885 From: Registered: Apr 2009
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posted July 05, 2013 08:45 AM
quote: Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways: Of course, I'm the only one to disagree with almost everyone. Or with everyone, period. I absolutely don't care about equality. Relationships are based on mutual understanding, and what works for a couple is defined within the domain of the couple. I believe in the economic theory of comparative advantage. I'm good at cooking, and therefore I do all the cooking at home. She does all the baking. She manages the household and has absolute veto power over all household decisions, such as what the house looks like, the routinely family budget, and what the children wear. I make all the money, and I'm singularly better at it than 99% of two income American familes. I have veto power over all major financial decisions and big ticket expenditures. The marriage is approaching 20 years. On day one of the marriage, we agreed that she shouldn't work. It only messes up and complicates my income taxes and increases my tax liability. So, she stopped working and it improved our lives.
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YoursTrulyAlways Knowflake Posts: 5364 From: Registered: Oct 2011
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posted July 05, 2013 10:30 AM
Having said what I said, it would have been great if I had some sugar mama feed me so that I have to do nothing and can be a beach bum for the rest of my life. It didn't work out that way.  IP: Logged |
Jessica2407 Knowflake Posts: 2693 From: Saturn Registered: Sep 2012
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posted July 05, 2013 10:41 AM
quote: Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways: Of course, I'm the only one to disagree with almost everyone. Or with everyone, period. I absolutely don't care about equality. Relationships are based on mutual understanding, and what works for a couple is defined within the domain of the couple. I believe in the economic theory of comparative advantage. I'm good at cooking, and therefore I do all the cooking at home. She does all the baking. She manages the household and has absolute veto power over all household decisions, such as what the house looks like, the routinely family budget, and what the children wear. I make all the money, and I'm singularly better at it than 99% of two income American familes. I have veto power over all major financial decisions and big ticket expenditures. The marriage is approaching 20 years. On day one of the marriage, we agreed that she shouldn't work. It only messes up and complicates my income taxes and increases my tax liability. So, she stopped working and it improved our lives.
I agree. I don't believe in equality in relationships either. What the heck does it mean?  I have my strengths and weaknesses, a perfect relationship for me would be relying on my hubby who is good at something that am weak at doing. A woman can't be good at everything neither can a man. IP: Logged |
Kerosene Knowflake Posts: 2856 From: Mercury Registered: Dec 2012
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posted July 05, 2013 01:55 PM
Are you two kidding me...?You obviously don't know what equality and balance means, right? I don't disagree with anything you guys say.. That's called a MARRIAGE. Of course someone has to take care of children... You even admit helping your wife... sooo what's the problem lol Lol people arguing for the sake of arguing. If you're specifically for someone to take care of you than that's wrong. Relationships aren't about that... You have to take care , you can't depend on anyone else. It's kinda pathetic, really. You need someone do things you can't? Just learn how to do it.. IP: Logged |
YoursTrulyAlways Knowflake Posts: 5364 From: Registered: Oct 2011
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posted July 05, 2013 08:38 PM
I can't give birth. That's what I can't do. Everything else, I can do. What you consider equality is a product of naïveté. Unless you are still griping about paying for some flipping lunch, and going Dutch is what you call equality. IP: Logged |
Textbook Knowflake Posts: 44 From: Scotland Registered: Jun 2013
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posted July 05, 2013 08:44 PM
I always wind up with people older than me whose Pluto lands on my luminaries or my inner planets. Always. My relationships are NEVER ever equal. They usually have the upper hand in multiple respects and gladly exploit it...then when it's over they complain that I was too controlling or wanted to control them.And I'm always like, "Okay, when was I EVER the one in control? It was always what you wanted, how you wanted, when you wanted it." IP: Logged |
Kerosene Knowflake Posts: 2856 From: Mercury Registered: Dec 2012
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posted July 05, 2013 08:46 PM
quote: Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways: I can't give birth. That's what I can't do. Everything else, I can do. What you consider equality is a product of naïveté. Unless you are still griping about paying for some flipping lunch, and going Dutch is what you call equality.
What does biology have to do with social relations?... Did you know, girls can't get boners either? lmao. I'm kidding.. I know what you are trying to SAY, without actually saying it, because it's sexist. A men and women have to follow their societally decided gender roles... These roles are NOT natural. Just say it, don't be a wuss and call me naive. Your argument is ignorant, begone now. IP: Logged |
page one Knowflake Posts: 62 From: USA Registered: Jun 2012
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posted July 05, 2013 09:03 PM
quote: Originally posted by YoursTrulyAlways: I can't give birth. That's what I can't do. Everything else, I can do. What you consider equality is a product of naïveté. Unless you are still griping about paying for some flipping lunch, and going Dutch is what you call equality.
If you are divvying up what needs to be done with your wife, dude, that *is* equality. Complementarity. You're sharing responsibilities. You could say you're spending your lives together "going dutch", because you've both got your respective jobs to do, contributing to the strength of the whole that is your relationship. IP: Logged |
Jessica2407 Knowflake Posts: 2693 From: Saturn Registered: Sep 2012
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posted July 06, 2013 02:18 AM
LOL @ KeroseneI understand what kerosene is saying,AND what YTA is saying. I agree to both. But I wouldn't use equality as an apt word, rather like page said complementarity between a woman and a man,like enzymes and substrates lol  IP: Logged |
Kerosene Knowflake Posts: 2856 From: Mercury Registered: Dec 2012
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posted July 06, 2013 03:08 AM
Nah I don't agree with him at all.. Patriarchy can suck a big one. No ambition of a man can triumph a mothers, that's for sure.  Hehe I have asteriod lilith conjunct asc & venus exact she represents "Rebellion, feminist, prostitution, exile, freedom fighter, confrontational, equality, impulsive, innovative, unconventional, asexual, instinctual, hands-on healing. she is hands on with her energy as represented by the hand like glyph. Earthy and practical, she reflects the part of the creation myth where she protests to God about having the “lay beneath” Adam and not being treated as his equal." I also have Black Moon Lilith on my dsc exact "Magic, animal magnetism, kundalini, creative force, tantric sex, seduction, intuition, psychic ability, imagination, poetry, psychic healing, hypnotism, charisma, glamour, shamanism, mushrooms, psychedelic drugs, matriarchy ." "When Lilith is conjunct the descendant, natives who desire relationships with strongly Lilithian women- women who are confident, authoritarian, and fiercely autonomous. This is because natives are driven to use the arena of partnership to explore Lilith's power, and only a mate who can keep up with her, as her equal[b]" Black Moon in the 7th is also a factor to attract people of great independence and originality to you, people with the qualities of Lilith: full-on passions and emotions, rebellious nature, dislike of patriarchal establishment and a need for absolute perfection "Lilith is found in Sagittarius a deeply rooted, fierce independence appears which permeates into the native's every day life. These individuals, as a result, will have very few truly close, personal commitments to others. [b]They are driven by both an insatiable wanderlust and a spine tingling fear of any kind of dependence.' I think with bml on the dsc symbolizes we are "reinventing the romantic" ...to knock it off its socially-accepted course towards marriage, procreation, and buying furniture. lol. I'm actually doing a series on lilith, right now I'm painting Lilith dominating Adam. I love this series a lot.. IP: Logged | |