posted November 03, 2014 02:01 PM            

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Originally posted by GoingDutch:
My insecure Pisces traits always at work, lol

next to neptune,
See, the problem is you trust your Libra 100%, I don't trust my Libra, and he has NOT done anything to make me insecure. I don't know why I get insecure like this.
I think it because I grow up seeing my father cheats on my mom, cheats and have children with other women outside marriage.

and next to neptune,
I wish my love life was simple and easy like you. At least you and your Libra both are European, you guys have same culture and everything in commons. So that less tress for you 2, and you 2 can concentrate on build your relationship stronger.
You don't have to deal with the pressure and hardship of being in an interracial relationship like in my case. This add more stress to our relationship, and one day he will snap or I snap.

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I wish I could say that was true, but just because we both raised with the same culture, doesnt make it easier... I think an interracial relationship would be just as easy - and ten times more interesting. You would always have something interesting to talk about... and something exiting to find out about the other. With the same culture everything is kind of known, maybe we agree on more things, but not nessesarily. There is always some small detail to disagree about:P With so many things that is NOT common, I guess smaller details wouldnt matter that much. You would really feel a strong bond, because you chose to be together despite of that?

posted November 03, 2014 02:17 PM              

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Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
^^^
Truth!
Several of us have tried to name this point about placements, and Libras.
I guess we just keep trying to get it into people's heads.

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posted November 03, 2014 08:59 PM            

I have to wonder because Libra tends to be friendly to everyone regardless of gender, and too much bad romance advice is if a man (or woman) so much as smiles at you then he wants you when that's not necessarily true.

Granted, even many guys who are genuinely friendly to women will take what's offered, if say a woman mistakes his kindness for romantic interests and starts seducing him (in his mind she started it, in her mind he did), especially if he's single. He may not even want to but feels compelled (especially when single) as otherwise his friends might think he was gay or something.

posted November 03, 2014 09:21 PM            

Unless the other party also has air and fire placement, she will not get it.

That said, there are quite a few Libra players out there. And I understand not all libras are like that but you have to admit you have a separate breed of players who claim "friendliness" when you realize you've taken the game a bit too far.

posted November 03, 2014 10:00 PM              

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
how old are you and what is "a bit" unfaithful to you?:P I think a bit unfaithful is when you might talk and write together with someone else while in a relationship (from the opposite sex) or maybe have a one-night stand, but other than that is completely loyal to your partner at the same time

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posted November 04, 2014 02:17 AM            

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Originally posted by KarkaQueen:

How is having a one-night stand [a full blown sex act with a completely different person] just a "bit" unfaithful? I suppose that would make sense if I compared it to me stabbing someone in the chest and they surviving would be "a bit" of a criminal act because they still lived.

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posted November 04, 2014 02:58 AM            

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
I wonder how many are mistaking being friendly for flirting?

I have to wonder because Libra tends to be friendly to everyone regardless of gender, and too much bad romance advice is if a man (or woman) so much as smiles at you then he wants you when that's not necessarily true.

Granted, even many guys who are genuinely friendly to women will take what's offered, if say a woman mistakes his kindness for romantic interests and starts seducing him (in his mind she started it, in her mind he did), especially if he's single. He may not even want to but feels compelled (especially when single) as otherwise his friends might think he was gay or something.

And that could be even more true for Libra men given that I've heard of more than one actually abused for being gay by the ignorant just because the Libra was inclined to be nice for the sake of being nice and to look nice. Though even in the best of times Libra sometimes takes a long moment weighing the scales on someone and might let a woman who had suddenly come on to him (the woman thinking the Libra had come onto her by acknowledging her existence) think he was interested while he spent some time trying to wonder if he really was. (That said, when Libra does finally make a call with certainty then they're likely to stick by it and will only "reopen the case" if there's a compelling reason to do so.)

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posted November 04, 2014 05:44 AM            

I'm gemini sun libra moon, and many of male friends seems to believe that I flirted with them which i wasn't. Like Xodian and PixieJane pointed out in above posts, I'm just being friendly. I like to smile to people, even to stranger, and make them feel at ease. It's on my nature to do so. I like to making conversation, doesn't mean I want to pursue a relationship or fling.

posted November 04, 2014 08:20 AM              

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
I wouldn't say a one-night stand is a deal-breaker in a relationship, but that is just me maybe... if I'm in a relationship, I'm willing to go far. And I think you can work through a one-night stand if the partner was drunk while he did it... sober is not so good no... I think it IS a really stupid thing to do and it is very close to a final deal-breaker, but the fact is that this happens in many many relationships and it doesn't have to mean anything serious or be the end. It's not as serious as if the partner had a flirt with someone totally sober for a long time and then acted on it too, that's 10 times worse in my book, because thats being emotionally unfaithful...

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Same crime, different way of executing it.

posted November 04, 2014 09:42 AM            

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
I wonder how many are mistaking being friendly for flirting?

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posted November 04, 2014 03:37 PM            

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
I'm starting to get a little bit too skeptical about them… haven't really met a libra who was completely loyal, but still they are very good to be in a relationship with?
How to really explain the behavior of libra men? They seem very stable in relationships and really "care for their women" and rarely creates conflicts, but then they also have their outbursts where they are unfaithful or have some secret (but mostly short?) affair with another?

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Sun in Libra is in its 'fall' position in which the Sun's strength is softened by appreciation of surface level beauty. This appreciation of beauty from an objective (usually visual) focus is good for initiating connections when seeing the beauty in others, but the visual distraction has to be counter-balanced -- within self or by the partner.

That is why the Libra male is often best paired up with a partner who is a Sun/Moon/ Asc in Aries type or who has generally a cardinal fire signature (4+ planets in cardinal signs and fire signs). This type of fire keeps the relationship focused in action that creates its own momentum, rather than getting sidetracked.

However, it is the male ego that typically has some aversion to the female 'prodder' or initiator, preferring instead a bit of roundabout false affirmation from the woman that plays 'pretty, demure' lady, wallflower/poser. The self-esteem needs to be solid enough to handle the challenge from such partners.

Sun in Libra emphasizes pleasure, a relaxed laissez faire approach, and objective appreciation of beauty. Generally an artistic outlet of some kind is needed. Music is not enough because in spite of the visual emphasis, touch needs to be involved. So when you can't put your hands on a lovely, put it on your instrument -- I mean a musical instrument.

Typical compensation
This is psychological concept I developed that indicates patterns, particularly with Sun/planet emphasize in certain signs (fall, detriment in particular). It indicates patterns of common responses and unconscious posture taken.

With the Libra type typical compensation shows physically very often as an unconscious backward pull of the derriere from a desire to protect one's 'vulnerabilities' (the organs of pleasure). This creates an effect of the butt sticking out a bit from the lower spine curving rearward more than typical for human anatomy. It tends to exacerbate lower back problems and issues with the pelvis.

Psychologically, the typical compensation of the Libra type shows as a tendency for paranoia, usually anxiety or suspicion of others' motives or intentions. So there is a built-in tendency for some responses of introversion for protection when these are triggered.

I have put this description in terms of 'male :female' to emphasize the typical principles involved. I acknowledge that there are some similar, yet some different dynamics in same sex relationships involving Libra types.

posted November 04, 2014 07:49 PM            

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:
If people keep having such misunderstandings maybe they should modify their behavior.

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posted November 04, 2014 07:52 PM              

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
OTOH, if most don't have such misunderstandings but a few consistently do then those few are the ones who need a clue, be they male or female. I see no reason to make life simpler for the village idiots, especially if it means you can't be nice to people unless you're interested in sex or marriage.

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posted November 04, 2014 11:01 PM            

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Originally posted by GoingDutch:
so what do u libras means by getting mistaken by being nice and flirt? smh

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First, it's not just "you libras." Many are nice and it gets mistaken for flirting, smh.

Being nice includes smiling, asking how someone is, and the like, even just acknowledging their existence. Unfortunately, too many "experts" tell you what to look for to see if they're interested in you romantically/sexually, and it includes looking someone in the eye, smiling, and the like. One guy praised by many women as a guru on what men think even said that if a man so much as looks at books next to you in a bookstore that he was obviously into you, smh (apparently he believes no man would read a book if he can help it, smh). If that's true then all my friends and many of my family are into me, smh. Furthermore, people who believe that such nice behavior can only mean some ulterior motive like seduction are obviously people who won't give you the time of day unless they want something from you, that is their smiles and friendliness are all fake because they want something from you (be it money, job, sex, manipulate them into marriage, etc) as they can't imagine any other reason to be nice to someone, smh.

Extreme example, though not unique: I volunteer to prepare an office for Halloween along with other volunteers. Knowing this might get messy I wear coveralls and plenty of clothing and also tie my hair back. I'm all about getting the job done yet I'm acknowledge the people around me, smile at them, etc. One man is friendly back, asks questions, and I answer friendly, just being friendly. Do I really have to explain what friendly means? SMH. It means nodding, casual smiles, looking him in the eye when I can, showing I'm paying attention and that he's someone who matters. It does NOT mean licking my lips suggestively at him or anything like that, it's basically treating him as I would a relative helping me out.

When he comes onto me I ignore it, change the subject as gracefully as possible hoping to let the awkwardness pass and him to give up without losing face, but he just pushes the envelope. I take a break from him, he calls me back for help with some rods that he turns into a sexual joke (has me hold one while he inserts the other, going back and forth a little while moaning and saying "baby, feels so good"). I don't say much because I don't want to get my friend fired but after several minutes of this I say politely but firmly, "That's enough, thank you." He stomps off and then I get thrown out for "leading him on" apparently because I smiled at the jerk and wasn't Queen ***** from the go, smh.

I've experienced worse. Polite behavior has gotten me yelled at to the point I feared for my safety because a guy thought I was leading him on. Most guys have better sense, thankfully, but the few village idiots sometimes make a lasting impression.

posted November 04, 2014 11:38 PM            

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I'm not surprised as it can basically be summed up as "if he notices you exist then he's into you," smh.

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That pretty much sums up my experience on the matter. Since we are doing anicdotes, here is what I had to deal with (and I'll let you guys decide if this counts as just being nice or flirting.)

So our R&D department usually gets Administrative interns that help us out around the office. So being the lead Manager, I have to establish a friendly but professional working environment. So we had a new intern come in once and I introduced myself, told her that her resume was quite impressive and she had an amazing fashion sense (she was dressed really nice but she was dressed professionally.) Naturally, the Administrative staff needs to be in touch with me at all times so she had my personal e-mail address with her.

2 days after she started working at the office, I started getting e-mails from her asking VERY personal questions. And keep in mind, she knew VERY well that I was married (from day 1 infact.) When I told her that she shouldn't be doing these kind of things in a professional environment, she told me that I should have kept things professional with her from the start.

Like really? Being told that you have a great sense of fashion and an impressive resume traslates to "I want you!" ?!?!?