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Author
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Topic: Aquarian men keeping in touch long after breakup
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incognito
Knowflake Posts: 160
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 01, 2014 11:11 AM
  
Why do you do this? Ask how the person is doing and try to get updates on their lives. Is it some sort of perverse thrill you get out of it or just curiosity? Doesn't your new gf mind that you are keeping in touch with your exes or do you just not have feelings therefore don't care about anyones elses feelings? I'd really like to know. IP: Logged |
FireMoon
unregistered
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posted January 01, 2014 11:50 AM
Lol I think it's more of just genuinely being able to stay friends... Although yeah sometimes the feelings are still there and it gets weird. I've stayed in touch with my Aqua ex for many years, my aqua venus conjuncts his sun... At one point things sort of evolved into basically an open relationship although we didn't really talk about it that wayeta: I get what you mean though, it can seem selfish. I don't fully understand it myself lol IP: Logged |
FireMoon
unregistered
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posted January 01, 2014 02:52 PM
Ok sorry to respond again to this thread but I've just been thinking about it and I also keep in touch with another Aqua venus guy who tbh I had sort of a similar situation with. It's nothing sexual or anything just the occasional checking in and updates on our lives sort of thing.. For me at least I guess I just think it's nice to know that even after romance isn't a part of it anymore the bond you had with that person is still there. Like we still care about each other even if it's not in that way.. But I totally get that some people might get suspicious or think it's something more than it isIP: Logged |
incognito
Knowflake Posts: 160
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 01, 2014 04:53 PM
thanks for your response. So it seems like you're saying its an ego thing. You want to know if you mean more to them than just another ex?IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
unregistered
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posted January 01, 2014 04:59 PM
I think it's just an air quality thing all together. I'm Libra dominant and I'm like that. IP: Logged |
summerlite
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted January 01, 2014 05:10 PM
that's dumb.Aquarius do that all the time because they are too emotionally detached hence emotionally insensitive to know where to draw the line. They still want to be friendly with you as a human (that's really what their sign is about) even though relations have strained. They completely forget about that and want back in your life saying "We're good right..." It's fine if you and your ex are not attached. And yes it gets ugly if the current gf is someone who actually minds about ex-gfs. Probably why Aquarius and Scorpios don't get along. IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze
unregistered
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posted January 01, 2014 05:54 PM
Hmmmm..... being on the opposite side - Leo. I really am... well, Opposite They get put behind and stay there.
Occasionally one manages to scratch and crawl back into the "friendzone" but it's never really the same. I keep my distance. I dated one Aquarius woman before and yes, she was like what you describe. (I know it's about men) IP: Logged |
incognito
Knowflake Posts: 160
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 01, 2014 05:59 PM
quote:
Originally posted by summerlite:
that's dumb.Aquarius do that all the time because they are too emotionally detached hence emotionally insensitive to know where to draw the line. They still want to be friendly with you as a human (that's really what their sign is about) even though relations have strained. They completely forget about that and want back in your life saying "We're good right..." It's fine if you and your ex are not attached. And yes it gets ugly if the current gf is someone who actually minds about ex-gfs. Probably why Aquarius and Scorpios don't get along.
Thats funny. So...they are detached when it comes to the way they relate to other people but when someone turns around and treats them the same way e.g. if I start talking to my ex, they cant take it and get mad. In that case they are the biggest hypocrites.
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summerlite
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted January 01, 2014 06:10 PM
That's when his Sun or Moon matters. Or even Venus. A Sag sign can be like that. He'll want his freedom to do what he wants but when you start talking to others, he'll start sulking.Actually most signs are contradicting when you think about it. IP: Logged |
theunknown
Knowflake Posts: 2745
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted January 01, 2014 06:18 PM
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FireMoon
unregistered
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posted January 01, 2014 06:29 PM
quote:
Originally posted by incognito:
thanks for your response. So it seems like you're saying its an ego thing. You want to know if you mean more to them than just another ex?
Wait what? Imo deciding someone is never worth talking to again just because things didn't work out romantically would be more of an ego thing... Staying friends doesn't automatically mean they're trying to get you back or are looking for an ego boost I think Aquas are just able to take a step back from intense situations which some ppl consider "cold", but really it allows us to keep connections with people through thick and thin, and I don't think there's usually an alterior motive. But I get that it's not how everyone does things. For me I've mainly stayed in touch like this with ppl who have aqua placements themselves, so it might be weird but it works for us I guess. So basically I do agree it would be selfish if the aqua person is dating someone new who has a problem with it, or if the ex still has hurt feelings and doesn't want to keep in touch or be friends. In which case I'm not insensitive at all and would respect their wishes. It's also not hypocritical if the aqua person is ok with their s.o. doing the same, which personally I don't have a problem with majority of the time...
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paulflo
Knowflake Posts: 73
From: uk
Registered: Sep 2012
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posted January 02, 2014 11:51 AM
This is a tough one.I find as an aquarian guy it takes alot to get a decent connection with someone and once its been achieved i find it hard to let go.It may be a perverse thing, a yearning for something we won't have again.It may be issues of closure or lack of..Maybe just needing to talk to someone who knows you intimately. For us aquarian guys it can be our achilles heel.
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Canadiangirl
Knowflake Posts: 883
From: Canada
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 02:13 PM
OMG, this is all so very true. I had to respond to this even though my ex was an Aquarius moon with Gemini venus. He was always very distant emotionally which I could never understand. My ex wanted to stay good friends and is also friends with all his ex's. He didn't understand why this was a problem for me as a cancer sun and leo venus. He had the emotional sympathy of a cement block. Strangely enough, he was a cancer sun.I don't think he means it in a harmful way and its more remaining friends with someone who shared his life for awhile. I don't mean to bad mouth him but what was written *really* hit home. Naturally, not all are like this but this guy had it in spades. IP: Logged |
LovelyAries86
Knowflake Posts: 2212
From: Pluto-Venusia
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted January 02, 2014 02:54 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Canadiangirl:
OMG, this is all so very true. I had to respond to this even though my ex was an Aquarius moon with Gemini venus. He was always very distant emotionally which I could never understand. My ex wanted to stay good friends and is also friends with all his ex's. He didn't understand why this was a problem for me as a cancer sun and leo venus. He had the emotional sympathy of a cement block. Strangely enough, he was a cancer sun.I don't think he means it in a harmful way and its more remaining friends with someone who shared his life for awhile. I don't mean to bad mouth him but what was written *really* hit home. Naturally, not all are like this but this guy had it in spades.
Cancer Sun, Aqua Moon, Leo Venus? So what was his Mars? I haven't dated anyone w/ this placement but a girl I used to be friends w/ had this. She was definitely all-over-the-place. She was emotional at dumb times, detached at times that called for emotion. WTF? She wouldn't stick to any plans you made. Soaked you up for all the sypmathy & help YOU could give but NEVER thought to extend that same help & compassion to her friends when the shoe was on the other foot! She changed over time. She went from being innocent, kind & genuine...to jealous, superficial & moody. Ruined our friendship! Not sure if your guy was like thiis or not. IP: Logged |
incognito
Knowflake Posts: 160
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 02:58 PM
Thanks for the responses. I feel that when its over its over. Its very black and white for me. It hurt like a b**** but I let go after the breakup. He did say he had feelings for me still and hinted at getting back together last year, but in that case he should have thought before ending it and moving on to another girl. i never end a relationship unless im sure and have given it my best. Thats why I never feel the need to go back. Hard for me to understand aquarians indecision or breakup/makeup cycle/contacting exes.  I think I will make it a new years resolution and just never respond again even though i cared for him a lot. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9168
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted January 02, 2014 05:10 PM
The worst thing is when you hear about them dating someone else and they want to tell you all about it blah blah blah. Too painful unless I am with someone else, too.IP: Logged |
incognito
Knowflake Posts: 160
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 05:54 PM
Ya, its painful for me even if I am with someone else. Wish I wasn't born with a moon-pluto. It makes everything feel so intense and painful even though I know it doesn't have to be and isn't for other folk. A simple e-mail from an ex makes me shut down some days. Then I will bottle it up but in the evening I will cry for hours. And the next day I will cry more because I feel bad for not being able to hold it all in.  Can't control these stupid emotions and it takes me forever to get over things!!!I need a better outlet. I envy air moons. IP: Logged |
Canadiangirl
Knowflake Posts: 883
From: Canada
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 05:58 PM
LovelyAries86: Cancer Sun, Aqua Moon, Leo Venus? So what was his Mars? She was definitely all-over-the-place. She was emotional at dumb times, detached at times that called for emotion. WTF? She wouldn't stick to any plans you made. Soaked you up for all the sypmathy & help YOU could give but NEVER thought to extend that same help & compassion to her friends when the shoe was on the other foot!
---I was the one with the leo venus. He had a leo mars and gemini venus. I don't know, maybe its also a leo vs leo thing too. lol
He definitely was all over the place with his emotions. Sometimes he showed a restricted form of affection and other times when it was called for he didn't have it. He did expect emotion when he needed it but not he other way around. I don't think we really understood each other despite our cancer suns. He was also military and English so maybe *that* played a factor too.
IP: Logged |
summerlite
Newflake Posts: 0
From:
Registered: Jun 2014
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posted January 02, 2014 06:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by paulflo:
This is a tough one.I find as an aquarian guy it takes alot to get a decent connection with someone and once its been achieved i find it hard to let go.It may be a perverse thing, a yearning for something we won't have again.It may be issues of closure or lack of..Maybe just needing to talk to someone who knows you intimately. For us aquarian guys it can be our achilles heel.
Aquarians are like robots. They wouldn't forget the person who made them "feel something called emotions". I suppose that's why they can be stubborn to let go when it comes to relationships. IP: Logged |
Canadiangirl
Knowflake Posts: 883
From: Canada
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 06:04 PM
summerlite: Aquarians are like robots. They wouldn't forget the person who made them "feel something called emotions". I suppose that's why they can be stubborn to let go when it comes to relationships.--lol, again so true. I used to say he was a robot. IP: Logged |
incognito
Knowflake Posts: 160
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 06:08 PM
 IP: Logged |
Canadiangirl
Knowflake Posts: 883
From: Canada
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 06:11 PM
incognito: I feel that when its over its over. Its very black and white for me. He did say he had feelings for me still and hinted at getting back together last year. Hard for me to understand aquarians indecision or breakup/makeup cycle/contacting exes. ---Again, I understand where you are coming from here. I'm the same way about breaking up. It would be like opening a slowly healing wound by remaining in contact. My ex would hint at getting together at a later date too and its just not something I wanted. Just out of curiousity, what are your placements? I'm sorry, you're going through so much pain right now. It sounds like you are experiencing something I did not too long ago. If he is like the guy I dated and you want someone more emotional, I would look elsewhere. I found it very difficult to deal with and also spent many a night crying. IP: Logged |
incognito
Knowflake Posts: 160
From:
Registered: Dec 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 06:15 PM
THanks, I know maybe I should go for Cancer guys. IP: Logged |
StarlightSmileSupreme
Knowflake Posts: 9168
From: neptune
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted January 02, 2014 06:17 PM
quote:
Originally posted by incognito:
Ya, its painful for me even if I am with someone else. Wish I wasn't born with a moon-pluto. It makes everything feel so intense and painful even though I know it doesn't have to be and isn't for other folk. A simple e-mail from an ex makes me shut down some days. Then I will bottle it up but in the evening I will cry for hours. And the next day I will cry more because I feel bad for not being able to hold it all in. Can't control these stupid emotions and it takes me forever to get over things!!!I need a better outlet. I envy air moons.
Same here, too emotional but I have improved. Are you a Scorpio moon or Pisces?nvm I just looked at your chart...looks like a Capricorn moon?
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Canadiangirl
Knowflake Posts: 883
From: Canada
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted January 02, 2014 06:19 PM
incognito: Heres my chart. me inside. Synastry and composite with the ex. Feel free to comment and analyze.--I don't want to coldly analyze your chart, you sound like you're in pain over this. I don't want to make things worse for you. I was just curious because it sounds very very similar to my not to distant situation. I was curious if you had a water sign or leo in your chart. The only thing I can suggest is try to break through the thick shell or find someone more emotional. I'm sorry if I came across as cold, its just shocking how similar it is to my old situation.
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Lindaland
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